Foreigner hangs himself, burns house down next to final message to wife: "You have stolen everything from me"

[kotsak]

And the problem persists since more are coming fresh from the boat.. oblivious to their own demise.

[Odysseus123]

1 minute ago, theguyfromanotherforum said:

 

It would have been more effective if written in Thai.

No.

 

The message got thru'..it certainly would not have done so if written in Thai.

[TallGuyJohninBKK]

12 minutes ago, ajarnmarc said:

At the end of the day, I too have thought about taking my own life, 

as it seems like I have no solutions to the problems laid out before me.

 

 

Leave???

 

Divorce her for fraud and theft?

Edited March 29, 2018 by TallGuyJohninBKK

[JMonroe]

How did he handcuff himself behind his back? Doesn't that seem a bit suspicious?

[IamNoone88]

Why would any-one in this state of mind think to handcuff themselves with their hands behind their back? 

[theguyfromanotherforum]

3 minutes ago, Odysseus123 said:

No.

 

The message got thru'..it certainly would not have done so if written in Thai.

 

She probably didn't even understand it or too lazy to read.

[dotpoom]

So so sad. Nobody kills themselves because they want to die. they feel it is tho only way to stop the suffering in the head.

   I once heard it put this way....."Hell, is being trapped in a body with a brain that has turned against you".

  I myself have been in that place during my 38 yrs. of active alcoholism  If one has never been there, it would be impossible to imagine what it is like.

PS. It has absolutely nothing to do with "will power".

[TallGuyJohninBKK]

11 minutes ago, Odysseus123 said:

 the horrendous problem of raising loans-not authorized by the foreigner-and the huge debt which ensued.

 

 

What's the legal situation about that here?

 

If one spouse takes out a loan/loans without the knowledge or permission of the other spouse, and the funds are not spent/used for marital purposes, my understanding is the other spouse is not legally responsible.

Edited March 29, 2018 by TallGuyJohninBKK

[harrycallahan]

If you're going to end it all might as well [redacted]. 

[TallGuyJohninBKK]

4 minutes ago, IamNoone88 said:

Why would any-one in this state of mind think to handcuff themselves with their hands behind their back? 

 

To restrain the instinctual response to try to save one's self, once they proceed with the hanging.

 

[chrisinth]

2 hours ago, kalidescopemind said:

How do Thais still get away with this?    How can you buy a property that you can't have in your name, and not know you are being screwed?

 

Its a little thing called love, spelt l-u-s-t  and pronounced something completely different for many a visitor to this fine country...............

[Odysseus123]

2 minutes ago, theguyfromanotherforum said:

 

She probably didn't even understand it or too lazy to read.

I don't think he wrote it for the wife..

 

This is posterity speaking-very sad.

[trianglechoke]

I cant believe the lack of empathy here. Thai visa sure never changes

[lucjoker]

very understandable.......

but why hang yourself ?

Just burn down the house ,car motorcycle .....empty the bank and take a plane .......

Sent her a christmas cart each year , with a picture of your new family........

 

[ianf]

3 hours ago, ChrisY1 said:

Just another victim of the perils of Thailand!

Poor guy..RiP.....But why neck yourself for this?

This kind of thing happens all the time. The Thai system is such that women are allowed to steal everything from their husbands. My ex tried the same thing. She got away with quite a lot but I didn't lose my house. The lawyer we had made it difficult because she played a double game. Trust no one.My friend is involved in an argument with his ex girlfriend and she has threatened him with death, jail, the police etc etc all over 65000 bt. Another friend lost his house which was bought with his life savings. On and on it goes and the government turns a blind eye by not allowing foreigners to own property. Believe me, Thailand is a scammers paradise.

[jenny2017]

8 minutes ago, ajarnmarc said:

My girlfriend since 2005, who I have two children with, has apparently decided to do something very similar to me. We have a business we made together, yet the paperwork is in her name, since the company isn't a Ltd. just private owner business. We bought a truck together, where I paid the initial deposit of 150,000 bht, and thereafter we paid the monthly payments together, yet when the truck was finally paid off in 2014, the misses waited just two months to go about taking out a private loan for 500,000 bht bank in 2015. I never knew a loan had be placed against the truck I believed was paid off, until October of 2017, when the loan agency came to retrieve the truck. 

Loan agency informed me that most of the payments were made late, sometimes up to four months without making a single payment, so they were left with no options but to come to retrieve the truck.

As a result this 500,000 bht loan placed in 2015, is now not due to expire until 2020, for a 2010 model truck.

The loan payments on the truck is higher than we initially paid, when we originally bought the truck, but what makes it even worse, is the misses never invested the 500k she received from this loan, 

back into the family in any way, so there were no signs she had come into a large sum of money.

At one point in 2017, she decided since I had never found out about the loan she took against the truck, she would try her luck again, and take the Honda Forza to the bank to take out a loan against that. This I paid for in cash, yet the book was in her name, due to me not having a work permit at the time of purchase, I later had planned to place the Motorcycle in my son name, since he's now 11 years old.

After she fell behind in both the Truck payments and the Motorcycle payments, she decided to convince my son to open my safe box; he was the only one who knew the combination, in the event something happened to me. She took out all the gold garments I had purchased for myself during our relationship; the ones I bought for her, she had sold already.

Went down to the local gold store and sold everything, this all happened before the loan agency came knocking for the retrieval of the truck. 

I just never had any reason to put it all together, yet the pieces were slowing falling into place...

When I ask her what she did with all the proceeds from any of the moves she made, 

it always responded with silence...no response at all coming, other than she knows she made a mistake.

I had very little, yet she has managed to take it all.

This lady was a room maid when I met her, I was the manager of the hotel she worked at.

She was hired as a part time staff, after we started to see each other after working hours, 

I spoke to a friend of mine who worked at another hotel near by, to see about getting this new interest in my life a full time position, so we might be able to pursue a long term relationship.

After she secured the new position, she proceeded to move in with me back in 2005.

 

Because we have so much time invested into this relationship, plus two children, 

and our business, it's hard to break free. Even as I try to make any new business or job of my own, 

she tries to find a way to lean onto that as well. Asking me for money to help pay her debts, or coming to my place of work, if I secure a position in the public sector.

 

At the end of the day, I too have thought about taking my own life, 

as it seems like I have no solutions to the problems laid out before me.

So I can totally understand this mans situation, and relate to his decision, 

as I attempt to remain strong for our children, but at times it's very hard indeed.

    You're not the only one who thought about taking his life, but you'd only run away from something. How much do you actually know about your wife?

Is she drug addicted, does she gamble?

 

   Taking your own life wouldn't be fair to your kids, even if you wouldn't have kids, it's not a wise decision to take your life.

 

   Even if it might sound very difficult, you should think about going back, moving to another province, starting over, even if that sounds impossible for you now.

 

   I hope that you've got some friends you can talk to, some people who can be there when you need them. If not, please feel free to send me a message/ 

 

  Don't do anything stupid, leaving kids without a daddy can't be the solution.

 

  

[chrisandsu]

21 minutes ago, ajarnmarc said:

My girlfriend since 2005, who I have two children with, has apparently decided to do something very similar to me.

We have a business we made together, yet the paperwork is in her name, since the company isn't a Ltd. just private owner business.

We bought a truck together, where I paid the initial deposit of 150,000 bht, and thereafter we paid the monthly payments together, yet when the truck was finally paid off in 2014, the misses waited just two months to go about taking out a private loan for 500,000 bht from a loan agency in 2015.

I never knew a loan had be placed against the truck, I believed it was paid off, until October of 2017, when the loan agency came to retrieve the truck. 

Loan agency informed me that most of the payments were made late, sometimes up to four months without making a single payment, so they were left with no options but to come to retrieve the truck.

As a result this 500,000 bht loan placed in 2015 against the truck I believed was fully paid off, is now not due to expire until 2020, at the earliest, for a 2010 model truck.

The loan payments on the truck is higher than we initially paid, when we originally bought the truck, but what makes it even worse, is the misses never invested the 500k she received from this loan, 

back into the family in any way, so there were no signs she had come into a large sum of money.

At one point in 2017, she decided since I had never found out about the loan she took against the truck, she would try her luck again, and take the Honda Forza to the bank to take out a loan against that. This I paid for in cash, yet the book was in her name, due to me not having a work permit at the time of purchase, I later had planned to place the Motorcycle in my son name, since he's now 11 years old.

After she fell behind in both the Truck payments and the Motorcycle payments, she decided to convince my son to open my safe box; he was the only one who knew the combination, in the event something happened to me. She took out all the gold garments I had purchased for myself during our relationship; the ones I bought for her, she had sold already.

Went down to the local gold store and sold everything, this all happened before the loan agency came knocking for the retrieval of the truck. 

I just never had any reason to put it all together, yet the pieces were slowing falling into place...

When I ask her what she did with all the proceeds from any of the moves she made, 

the responses were always meet with silence...no response at all coming, other than she knows she made a mistake.

I had very little, yet she has managed to take it all.

This lady was a room maid when I met her, I was the manager of the hotel she worked at.

She was hired as a part time staff, after we started to see each other after working hours, 

I spoke to a friend of mine who worked at another hotel near by, to see about getting this new interest in my life a full time position, so we might be able to pursue a long term relationship.

After she secured the new position, she proceeded to move in with me back in 2005.

 

Because we have so much time invested into this relationship, plus two children, 

and our business, it's hard to break free. Even as I try to make any new business or job of my own, 

she tries to find a way to lean onto that as well. Asking me for money to help pay her debts, or coming to my place of work, if I secure a position in the public sector.

 

At the end of the day, I too have thought about taking my own life, 

as it seems like I have no solutions to the problems laid out before me.

So I can totally understand this mans situation, and relate to his decision, 

as I attempt to remain strong for our children, but at times it's very hard indeed.

Please go talk to someone . You wouldn’t want your kids to end up with her . I hope you pull through and keep going mate . Those little ones rely on you. 

[BEVUP]

15 minutes ago, ajarnmarc said:

My girlfriend since 2005, who I have two children with, has apparently decided to do something very similar to me.

We have a business we made together, yet the paperwork is in her name, since the company isn't a Ltd. just private owner business.

We bought a truck together, where I paid the initial deposit of 150,000 bht, and thereafter we paid the monthly payments together, yet when the truck was finally paid off in 2014, the misses waited just two months to go about taking out a private loan for 500,000 bht from a loan agency in 2015.

I never knew a loan had be placed against the truck, I believed it was paid off, until October of 2017, when the loan agency came to retrieve the truck. 

Loan agency informed me that most of the payments were made late, sometimes up to four months without making a single payment, so they were left with no options but to come to retrieve the truck.

As a result this 500,000 bht loan placed in 2015 against the truck I believed was fully paid off, is now not due to expire until 2020, at the earliest, for a 2010 model truck.

The loan payments on the truck is higher than we initially paid, when we originally bought the truck, but what makes it even worse, is the misses never invested the 500k she received from this loan, 

back into the family in any way, so there were no signs she had come into a large sum of money.

At one point in 2017, she decided since I had never found out about the loan she took against the truck, she would try her luck again, and take the Honda Forza to the bank to take out a loan against that. This I paid for in cash, yet the book was in her name, due to me not having a work permit at the time of purchase, I later had planned to place the Motorcycle in my son name, since he's now 11 years old.

After she fell behind in both the Truck payments and the Motorcycle payments, she decided to convince my son to open my safe box; he was the only one who knew the combination, in the event something happened to me. She took out all the gold garments I had purchased for myself during our relationship; the ones I bought for her, she had sold already.

Went down to the local gold store and sold everything, this all happened before the loan agency came knocking for the retrieval of the truck. 

I just never had any reason to put it all together, yet the pieces were slowing falling into place...

When I ask her what she did with all the proceeds from any of the moves she made, 

the responses were always meet with silence...no response at all coming, other than she knows she made a mistake.

I had very little, yet she has managed to take it all.

This lady was a room maid when I met her, I was the manager of the hotel she worked at.

She was hired as a part time staff, after we started to see each other after working hours, 

I spoke to a friend of mine who worked at another hotel near by, to see about getting this new interest in my life a full time position, so we might be able to pursue a long term relationship.

After she secured the new position, she proceeded to move in with me back in 2005.

 

Because we have so much time invested into this relationship, plus two children, 

and our business, it's hard to break free. Even as I try to make any new business or job of my own, 

she tries to find a way to lean onto that as well. Asking me for money to help pay her debts, or coming to my place of work, if I secure a position in the public sector.

 

At the end of the day, I too have thought about taking my own life, 

as it seems like I have no solutions to the problems laid out before me.

So I can totally understand this mans situation, and relate to his decision, 

as I attempt to remain strong for our children, but at times it's very hard indeed.

Sounds similar to me 

& I would say it may have contributed to the mans death

In my case I know exactly where it went. To my wifes so called family (i don't recognise them anymore )

I didn't know all this was happening (but with Thais having a Mai Pen Rai attitude ), there wont be a problem.

There certainly was a problem when the so called family member wasn't making payments & didn't have the balls to say

Then wife got bluffed again (the old "you will get a parcel of the land when we split it), had nothing to show for it & had to pay the excessive interest on the car hock as well 

[Justfine]

2 hours ago, robblok said:

If you say so, I am not expert on knots so I am not going to dispute what your saying.

Try it with string. That way you can escape if it does work.

[Katipo]

1 hour ago, geriatrickid said:

We do not know. What we do know is;

- Emotional distress that culminates in suicide is not a sudden event. It occurs over a period of time and often has signal events prior to the suicide.

- In the absence of knowing the person's mental health history, family situation, drug  including alcohol use patterns and criminal history it is  unfair to assume that the woman is responsible.  

 

Yes, it's fun for some to blame the Thai woman for the failures of the foreign male, particularly if the  people blaming have a history of failed relationships, but I suggest that it is prudent to wait for all facts to be established.

 

Does anyone know who this man was? Seriously? Was he nice guy or was he a brutal drunk or a mental case? My experience has been that there are  other factors involved and sometimes they are not pretty. No one sane kills himself over a domestic dispute. Thhre is always a long standing history of domestic abuse, or threats or confrontation prior. The former police officers on the forum will tell you that.

What I see here are people allowing personal bias to corrupt the process. Who is the deceased? The fact that no one may know him in Thailand suggests plenty.

The facts won't be established. Suicide... book closed.

 

Based on the writing on the wall, his Thai wife played a pivotal role in him taking his own life.

 

The number of otherwise sane (and naive) western men that come here and get lied to and screwed over in a way that they did not know was even possible, is quite alarming. The level of deceptiveness involved simply pushed them over the edge because they simply comprehend the duplicity.

 

Now, not everyone handles this by taking there own life, but based on the what we know, it's fair to say this man wouldn't be dead today if it wasn't for this woman.

[Odysseus123]

8 minutes ago, TallGuyJohninBKK said:

 

What's the legal situation about that here?

 

If one spouse takes out a loan/loans without the knowledge or permission of the other spouse, and the funds are not spent/used for marital purposes, my understanding is the other spouse is not legally responsible.

Try proving that in a court of law.

 

Most foreigners I knew just accepted the inevitable and departed.

 

Thankfully none of them had small children to tear at the heartstrings..

[Cereal]

Brutal. I wonder why he decided to go it alone. If I ever got pushed to a point of no return....well....

[talahtnut]

Male suicide is on the rise in the UK too.

The basic universal rules are Never trust a woman.

Dont put all your eggs in one basket, and be prepared to

walk away at a moment notice.

Understand that women can not love men..its an illusion.

A sad case indeed, RIP.

[cardinalblue]

She might not remember him as she had moved to other fish to fry...

[Borzandy]

RIP. Sad for his daughter, but the wife don't care about his message.

[InMyShadow]

We have all seen or heard of Foreigners parted from everything they have by the GF and family, but that is truly tragic. RIP.
 

Usually ex prostitute. Why do idiot farangs keep taking them on?

Only one person to blame..

[Ejjeje]

If he loved his daughter, he would not have left her alone...

[holy cow cm]

Tremendous amount of pain he had. People need to be better emotionally prepared. At least he only took his own life. 

[NCC1701A]

every day I have a budget of so much baht, which can include a huge amount of debauchery.

 

Easy to stay on budget if you don't get emotionally involved.

 

Ironically it is the debauchery and my very valuable freedom that keeps me from going broke here in the land of scams.

 

and after four years in Thailand the girls know you know the score when you say you don't have a girlfriend.

 

and if you think Thailand is bad try getting divorced in California.   

Edited March 29, 2018 by NCC1701A

[BEVUP]

5 minutes ago, InMyShadow said:

Usually ex prostitute. Why do idiot farangs keep taking them on?

Only one person to blame..

Not in all cases

The problem is the the husband doesn't know of the pressures the family put on the daughter until it's to late.

Then there's only 2 options 

1 - Try & solve the mess at a cost that you were not expecting (if you can ) & Tighten the belt into your favour

2 - Walk away depending on situation