Is raising children in Pattaya irresponsible parenting?

[RichardColeman]

 

19 hours ago, dfdgfdfdgs said:

For example I wonder if living in Pattaya as a young female, you are more likely to engage in prostitution later in your life,

 

As for women and girls more likely to become prostitutes, I'd have to say that I have never met a prostitute that grew up in Pattaya or been influenced by it ! So assumption is way off there.

[Thian]

15 hours ago, geriatrickid said:

It's like the residents of Amsterdam. They have the laughable redllight district and  mugging zone near the train station. Normal well adjusted residents avoid it.

Normal well  Amsterdam residents moved out 10 years ago already mate. 

 

And what's so laughable about the redlight district? Loads of Londoners go there for the weekend...

[Hummin]

I voted yes, but then again, it is all up to their parents how they are going to turn out. If they are simple people living typical pattaya bar life, then of course it is not good. Then again, living a country life is no better option going to the local school there. It is all about the parents, how much resourches they have to give their kids a good start in life. 

 

Growing up in the rural village full of yaba and lao kao? Where police give kids yaba and control the sale? 

[reenatinnakor]

I don't think innocents, by which I assume you mean adults, coming to Pattaya to make their fortune has any relevance. Central Pattaya from the roundabout to the end of walking street, I think it is not unfair to say, is one massive brothel. So it's not about whether your kids are aware of it or not but why one would choose to raise children there and expose them to that environment? Thai families that work there have far fewer choices than those foreigners  who choose to reside there. I had my Pattaya days and thoroughly enjoyed them. Two things I knew early on were one, I knew I could never live there and two I could never marry a hooker. I mean I guess that some pickled foreigner that marries a bar girl and knocks out a couple of tin lids really doesn't care much about where his kids are raised. But how could a caring, responsible parent, in good faith, want to raise a child anywhere near the joint? I realise that you wouldn't be hanging around in beer bars and such with your children. Though I have seen that too. But kids aren't stupid do they really need to see all that when they are growing up?

So if you lived near a hospital, all your kids will grow up to be doctors or nurses? If you live near an airport your kids will be pilots? Lol. 55555.

Sent from my LG-H990 using Thailand Forum - Thaivisa mobile app

[Peterw42]

Its just a ridiculous premise, living in a city that has a red light area, your kids will become hookers.

 

I lived, and raised my kids, living for a while in Kings cross/potts point in Sydney Australia, the red light area, bars, strip clubs, brothels, street walkers etc. Also in this suburb are some of the most exclusive private schools, Rupert Murdochs house, and some of the most expensive real estate in Australia. Many international consulates/residences are in the same suburb.

 

Australia also has legal brothels in most suburbs, and hookers advertise in the phone book.

 

I guess I am lucky that my kids didnt become hookers etc, given their exposure.

[Hummin]

27 minutes ago, Peterw42 said:

Its just a ridiculous premise, living in a city that has a red light area, your kids will become hookers.

 

I lived, and raised my kids, living for a while in Kings cross/potts point in Sydney Australia, the red light area, bars, strip clubs, brothels, street walkers etc. Also in this suburb are some of the most exclusive private schools, Rupert Murdochs house, and some of the most expensive real estate in Australia. Many international consulates/residences are in the same suburb.

 

Australia also has legal brothels in most suburbs, and hookers advertise in the phone book.

 

I guess I am lucky that my kids didnt become hookers etc, given their exposure.

It is also your locals you hang out with who will form your kids, and their standards as much where you live. 

[starky]

1 minute ago, Hummin said:

It is also your locals you hang out with who will form your kids, and their standards as much where you live. 

You can't reason with unreasonable people 

[starky]

53 minutes ago, reenatinnakor said:

So if you lived near a hospital, all your kids will grow up to be doctors or nurses? If you live near an airport your kids will be pilots? Lol. 55555.

Sent from my LG-H990 using Thailand Forum - Thaivisa mobile app
 

Is that what I said or even anywhere near close to what I said chuckles? But if I had an option of my kids living near a hospital an airport or the world's biggest brothel guess which one comes in third?

[Hummin]

59 minutes ago, reenatinnakor said:

So if you lived near a hospital, all your kids will grow up to be doctors or nurses? If you live near an airport your kids will be pilots? Lol. 55555.

Sent from my LG-H990 using Thailand Forum - Thaivisa mobile app
 

I guess it would be higher chance they becoome doctors and nurses and even pilots, than being hookers ;-) 

 

I got in to aerial activity becouse being exposed to it when young. Love at first sight I would say ;-)

[starky]

47 minutes ago, Peterw42 said:

Its just a ridiculous premise, living in a city that has a red light area, your kids will become hookers.

 

I lived, and raised my kids, living for a while in Kings cross/potts point in Sydney Australia, the red light area, bars, strip clubs, brothels, street walkers etc. Also in this suburb are some of the most exclusive private schools, Rupert Murdochs house, and some of the most expensive real estate in Australia. Many international consulates/residences are in the same suburb.

 

Australia also has legal brothels in most suburbs, and hookers advertise in the phone book.

 

I guess I am lucky that my kids didnt become hookers etc, given their exposure.

Again with the false premises kings cross is like potts point is like there are only a couple of sois with hookers in Pattaya. I grew up around the cross too mate. I wouldn't want my kids to have the same childhood I did. What relevance does a legal brothel in a residential neighbourhood or a hooker advertising in a newspaper have to do with what you can see in Pattaya on a daily basis. I am not saying your kids will be better off for growing up there or worse or will get on the game but if you had a choice why would you raise them there. Trying to alter my argument to fit your opinions is pointless. I'm out. Your arguments make very little sense.

[manarak]

19 hours ago, dfdgfdfdgs said:

maybe they just end up with a more liberal view about sex. 

and that would be very bad, wouldn't it ...

 

[trianglechoke]

20 hours ago, johng said:

In short ...no I dont think its irresponsible...
Many thousands of kids raised in Pattaya turn out "perfectly normal"

Normal.... Quantify that.

[johng]

6 minutes ago, trianglechoke said:

Normal.... Quantify that.

Normal as in  not  drugged up,prostitute,psychopath murderers.... you know  normal like most others.

[trianglechoke]

Basic sociology and psychology people.

The human brain copies and gravitates towards similarity in some way.... This is really basic stuff.

 

Humans often copy behaviour and habits of those around them for life. Religion, smoking, drinking, hobbies and more.

 

The likely hood of liking and wanting to do certain things because of repeated exposure is so easy to prove. Literally millions of papers on it, google away.

 

The more desensitised  to behaviour which might otherwise be considered dangerous or something like that, plus peers doing it and having what seems like more reward over problem=, the more likely that behaviour is no considered out of bonnds......... And this behaviour which parents tried to steer kids from, becomes something not so bad and doable.

 

People here will argue saying i know someone who..... a zero proof example that may or may not exist. 

 

I know someone who didn't grow up a smoker.... but waaaaaaaaaaaay over 60% of young people who smoke were raised by smokers. There are so many behavioural examples to back it, papers galore... I am amazed this isn't common knowledge.

 

Finally........... Every girl I met who has lived in Pattaya and avoided to part-time hooking..... Which I only have their word at................ was a really c.o.c.k. hungry s.l.u.t. which a disproportionate need for sexual contact.

 

Argue away............. What a question... Is is irresponsible to raise kids, daughters in particular in a whote city... yes.... does it increase likelihood to certain behaviours... yes...... is it 100%... no.. is it high... yes 

[newnative]

   One of the dumbest threads posted on Thai Visa.  

[Hupaponics]

Parenting is not an easy task anywhere in the world. I will give my reflection on personal experience.

 

I asume OP is a god father/mother and live in a healthy relationship with intentions to make the best out of their children. Although the intentions are there, it is difficult to "control" what kind of friends the kids choose to play with. 

 

There are very goodhearted kids decending from a poor family, as well as there are bad kids from hi-so families and vice vers. Based on that we (parents) can not buy ourselves out to believe an expensive school is a guarantee for making better friends to our kids.

 

It's really not to the location (city) you are living in, nor the school you put them in. Look at any mayor city in the world. Kids turn up both bad and good. The key is to monitor ones kid to see who he/she is playing with. Low grades does not mean that the kid is stupid. Often does this relate to that he/she hangs out with other students that do not study.

 

So to my experience. This was not in Pattaya, however is applied to every major city.

To make long story short. She was doing well in school and at age 14 changed school (in US i think this is called high-school?). Different countries different school systems, anyhow she came to an new class.

New classmates and after a while I noticed strange behavior in her (not the normal teenage revolt hahaha) and with dropping grades.

Fast forward...

We decided to move to an other city to brake her bounds with this trash people she started to hang out with. So from her being close to drug addiction and not care about studies, she now have a bachelor degree and a well paid job she loves.

 

Bottom line.

I don't think Pattaya (although i personally don't not like this city) is a bad place to raise children IF they hang out with the good kids. No need to curl the kids in cotton, they can learn everything about Walking Street and all the "bad" things. It really comes down to how well parents can observe the changes in their kids if they start to go the wrong path and being able to take action.

 

Read between the lines, English is not my native tongue.

Cheers

[thailand49]

I don't think there are any real statistic or experts regarding this topic and that includes me.  I'm Asian and live pretty much with the Thai population on the Darkside what I do know is we all are a bit bias because one concludes what they have experience and just because people haven't doesn't mean it doesn't exist we experience and conclude in general terms. 

 

What I seen first hand and experience myself and through family members who alive here and have kids of their own or has taken in or actually adopted them. 

 

I firmly believe that any Thai family that has a expat involved in the raising of the child has so much advantage compare to a Thai family that doesn't have much contact with foreigners.  You read it and see the comments the general success given are exact that a foreign influence. A high % of the Thai children in my village it is like playing a CD,  they have been taught one way to raise the children the same manner it was handed down.  They have not been educated or given any type of alternative although I also believe no society has the correct answer but we are educated in alternatives.  A good example as to what I just said in how they drive here and why the problem can't be fixed. Those who want to fix it have no authority and those that have the authority because they haven't been given or won't accept outside help or suggestion so the wheel keeps spinning.

 

As noted, it is what the Thai parent is the priority regarding education and without going into facts and figure you one opens their thinking every education expert even Thais have express negatives regarding government run schools. For myself, my village I see children that have grown up and now playing parents only think of school as a baby sitting service going through the motion. 

 

Foreigners have that alternative so communication and providing structure is very important I see the success stories posted here but like the kids playing at my house now I never see their mother, who words the bars at night and sleep all day.  She is only 19 years of age I remember her when she was 9 playing as soon as she started to develop 12-13 I can see the look from the men then the kids starting to come around the outcome was obvious. 

 

Living here in Pattaya, you see kids playing at times in bars etc.. it can't be avoided but you can't try to hide it. It is just best to communicate and provide the best education and provide alternatives so they don't have to which is what many on this board have done.  But if you are like me it is a overwhelming task since outside of our homes especially my village every friend my son has had family missing a parent there is no parental control based on our standard and their friends look at me like WHAT?   say to my son why is your father like that so strict so when he walks out the door there isn't any re-enforcement what so ever. Friends don't understand simple stuff we take for granted, like a curfew, dinner time we all eat at the same time?  Now that school is out, I have a half dozen kids playing at my house/shop  they are as young as 5 years old hunger, dirty, all will most likely become just like their mother or father.  

 

To me there are good and bad Thais but you got to have a real education to know you are getting a bad deal.  Sure it is all relative to this country 9000 baht a month minimum wage and I salute Thais being able to live off it. I see kids go to school for 10 plus years to get a education but if you are a boy and your grades are low government high schools won't accept you the reason to me at least why so many are out riding their bikes at night.  Places like 7/11, Lotus, Big C majority foreign own companies cashiers all young pretty I wonder where are all the old ladies it seems after a few years they get replaced? 

 

A first hand Thai family before my cousin came into their lives,  mother worked in a bar,  all her kids work in bars or go go's it was accepted as if it was everyone going into the family business because they knew no other way and taking the easy way out was how they were taught.  So not everyone but it happens and more often that we care to think it is tough at times for another foreigner to even consider because they have done their job put in their influence as to how they grew up, many Thais in general don't have the luxury of a foreigner in their life. 

 

I can go on and on with true stories the affect of their education system is far greater I believe outside of Bangkok and Pattaya since their is less foreign influence so the assembly line of girls will continue to Bangkok and Pattaya will continue. Real opportunity just isn't there compare to how we know it but it doesn't mean Thailand is bad, there aren't a lot of rags to riches stories like a Obama being able to be President, Bill Gates, Steve Jobs etc.. research will show you those that have it the most powerful in this country many were given a hand up.  You read about the up coming election and see if you are a outsider you aren't going to make it very far at all.  

 

That is my long 2 cents on this matter. 

[trianglechoke]

Simple probability with some knowledge of neurology.

 

[Mac98]

There seems to be a lot of rich kids raised in "ideal" neighborhoods and they turn out to be horrid people. Why is exposing kids to the inside of swindling the masses out of their last dime somehow more honorable than them learning that people have sex? Maybe if the wealthy didn't grab so much for themselves there wouldn't be so many girls selling it. (Of course the guys would still want to buy it.)

[The manic]

2 hours ago, starky said:

I don't think innocents, by which I assume you mean adults, coming to Pattaya to make their fortune has any relevance. Central Pattaya from the roundabout to the end of walking street, I think it is not unfair to say, is one massive brothel. So it's not about whether your kids are aware of it or not but why one would choose to raise children there and expose them to that environment? Thai families that work there have far fewer choices than those foreigners  who choose to reside there. I had my Pattaya days and thoroughly enjoyed them. Two things I knew early on were one, I knew I could never live there and two I could never marry a hooker. I mean I guess that some pickled foreigner that marries a bar girl and knocks out a couple of tin lids really doesn't care much about where his kids are raised. But how could a caring, responsible parent, in good faith, want to raise a child anywhere near the joint? I realise that you wouldn't be hanging around in beer bars and such with your children. Though I have seen that too. But kids aren't stupid do they really need to see all that when they are growing up?

It not one massive brothel. 

[kannot]

I wouldnt raise any in Thailand with their view of the world.

[trianglechoke]

I would like the voting to be done with 100 men who live in pattaya and 100 women who live in pattaya..... I am certain the men's sexual factors would influence them and the women would generally say its a bad place to raise kids,

[NoshowJones]

21 minutes ago, Mac98 said:

There seems to be a lot of rich kids raised in "ideal" neighborhoods and they turn out to be horrid people. Why is exposing kids to the inside of swindling the masses out of their last dime somehow more honorable than them learning that people have sex? Maybe if the wealthy didn't grab so much for themselves there wouldn't be so many girls selling it. (Of course the guys would still want to buy it.)

Excellent post, I could not agree more. 

[newnative]

2 hours ago, starky said:

I don't think innocents, by which I assume you mean adults, coming to Pattaya to make their fortune has any relevance. Central Pattaya from the roundabout to the end of walking street, I think it is not unfair to say, is one massive brothel. So it's not about whether your kids are aware of it or not but why one would choose to raise children there and expose them to that environment? Thai families that work there have far fewer choices than those foreigners  who choose to reside there. I had my Pattaya days and thoroughly enjoyed them. Two things I knew early on were one, I knew I could never live there and two I could never marry a hooker. I mean I guess that some pickled foreigner that marries a bar girl and knocks out a couple of tin lids really doesn't care much about where his kids are raised. But how could a caring, responsible parent, in good faith, want to raise a child anywhere near the joint? I realise that you wouldn't be hanging around in beer bars and such with your children. Though I have seen that too. But kids aren't stupid do they really need to see all that when they are growing up?

     Umm, no.  Central Pattaya from the roundabout to Walking Street is not 'one massive brothel'.  About as dumb a comment as the original post.  In the area you mention, you will find some of the nicest hotels in Pattaya, including Amari, Hilton, Dusit, Mytt, Siam@Siam, among others.  Amari is adding an even more luxurious hotel to its site.  Centre Point Hotel is also being built.  The massive Terminal 21 is nearing completion, to add more nice shopping and restaurant choices to the malls already in place, including Central Festival, Marina, and Royal Garden.  Several large, nice highrise condos have recently been built--Centric Sea and The Base--to join the very nice Northshore and View Talay 6.  Sansiri is in the process of adding another large, luxury condo, The Edge, as well.  I could also mention a large hospital and several live performance theaters also in the mix.  You need to get out more--or refrain from commenting on something you know nothing about.

[trianglechoke]

4 hours ago, Blackheart1916 said:

If, in a city the size of Pattaya, you can't manage to keep your kids away from Soi 6/WS/Bukhao et al, you are not fit to be a parent.

You think that's all Pattaya has?

[jenny2017]

  Not the ideal place for kids in a city with too many child molesters, ladyboys, and naked girls. On the other hand, the police force is breathtaking and crimes are almost impossible. 

   One day they'll be old enough to go out alone, I think there's the problem. 

I'd never let kids play alone in such a fun city......

[Ridler]

Thousands upon thousands of children are growing up in Pattaya, Thai and foreign, rich and poor and it is just like any other city around Thailand, people are just trying to get on with their lives. Maybe the OP thinks that Pattaya is nothing but Walking Street and Beach Road

[Peterw42]

So logically speaking, most bargirls and hookers come from issan, they were raised in issan. Therefore isnt it irresponsible parenting to raise your children in issan. The place where many go on to be hookers.

[jenny2017]

50 minutes ago, thailand49 said:

I don't think there are any real statistic or experts regarding this topic and that includes me.  I'm Asian and live pretty much with the Thai population on the Darkside what I do know is we all are a bit bias because one concludes what they have experience and just because people haven't doesn't mean it doesn't exist we experience and conclude in general terms. 

 

What I seen first hand and experience myself and through family members who alive here and have kids of their own or has taken in or actually adopted them. 

 

I firmly believe that any Thai family that has a expat involved in the raising of the child has so much advantage compare to a Thai family that doesn't have much contact with foreigners.  You read it and see the comments the general success given are exact that a foreign influence. A high % of the Thai children in my village it is like playing a CD,  they have been taught one way to raise the children the same manner it was handed down.  They have not been educated or given any type of alternative although I also believe no society has the correct answer but we are educated in alternatives.  A good example as to what I just said in how they drive here and why the problem can't be fixed. Those who want to fix it have no authority and those that have the authority because they haven't been given or won't accept outside help or suggestion so the wheel keeps spinning.

 

As noted, it is what the Thai parent is the priority regarding education and without going into facts and figure you one opens their thinking every education expert even Thais have express negatives regarding government run schools. For myself, my village I see children that have grown up and now playing parents only think of school as a baby sitting service going through the motion. 

 

Foreigners have that alternative so communication and providing structure is very important I see the success stories posted here but like the kids playing at my house now I never see their mother, who words the bars at night and sleep all day.  She is only 19 years of age I remember her when she was 9 playing as soon as she started to develop 12-13 I can see the look from the men then the kids starting to come around the outcome was obvious. 

 

Living here in Pattaya, you see kids playing at times in bars etc.. it can't be avoided but you can't try to hide it. It is just best to communicate and provide the best education and provide alternatives so they don't have to which is what many on this board have done.  But if you are like me it is a overwhelming task since outside of our homes especially my village every friend my son has had family missing a parent there is no parental control based on our standard and their friends look at me like WHAT?   say to my son why is your father like that so strict so when he walks out the door there isn't any re-enforcement what so ever. Friends don't understand simple stuff we take for granted, like a curfew, dinner time we all eat at the same time?  Now that school is out, I have a half dozen kids playing at my house/shop  they are as young as 5 years old hunger, dirty, all will most likely become just like their mother or father.  

 

To me there are good and bad Thais but you got to have a real education to know you are getting a bad deal.  Sure it is all relative to this country 9000 baht a month minimum wage and I salute Thais being able to live off it. I see kids go to school for 10 plus years to get a education but if you are a boy and your grades are low government high schools won't accept you the reason to me at least why so many are out riding their bikes at night.  Places like 7/11, Lotus, Big C majority foreign own companies cashiers all young pretty I wonder where are all the old ladies it seems after a few years they get replaced? 

 

A first hand Thai family before my cousin came into their lives,  mother worked in a bar,  all her kids work in bars or go go's it was accepted as if it was everyone going into the family business because they knew no other way and taking the easy way out was how they were taught.  So not everyone but it happens and more often that we care to think it is tough at times for another foreigner to even consider because they have done their job put in their influence as to how they grew up, many Thais in general don't have the luxury of a foreigner in their life. 

 

I can go on and on with true stories the affect of their education system is far greater I believe outside of Bangkok and Pattaya since their is less foreign influence so the assembly line of girls will continue to Bangkok and Pattaya will continue. Real opportunity just isn't there compare to how we know it but it doesn't mean Thailand is bad, there aren't a lot of rags to riches stories like a Obama being able to be President, Bill Gates, Steve Jobs etc.. research will show you those that have it the most powerful in this country many were given a hand up.  You read about the up coming election and see if you are a outsider you aren't going to make it very far at all.  

 

That is my long 2 cents on this matter. 

True words. Education is more important than many people think. You only have to take a look at the little general with his being too small complex, his way of interacting with other people as they were all little kids. 

[jenny2017]

7 minutes ago, Peterw42 said:

So logically speaking, most bargirls and hookers come from issan, they were raised in issan. Therefore isnt it irresponsible parenting to raise your children in issan. The place where many go on to be hookers.

4

Isaan is home to one-third of Thailand's population. Most taxi drivers in Bangkok are also from Isaan. Are they bad people, because they were born there?

There's absolutely no logic in your post. 

 

  Of course are Isaan girls the biggest population of hookers, but that doesn't make all of them to whores, does it?