Thai womens' attitudes to money in relationships

[garyk]

A little off topic i guess but thought I would throw this in. I keep a small home in America. Where I live several months a year. ALONE... I personally find it nice to get out of Thailand for a while each year.  

 

My neighbor living across the street from me brought his Thai wife back, and her kids. What a total mess that turned out to be. 

The neighbors are calling the police on them constantly for fighting and having junk thrown in the yard. I kid you not before I left this last time they were fined 2500 dollars. The city brought in a huge dumpster and demanded they clean up the mess in the yard. The kids ended up marring dead beats. It is a scene from a disaster movie... crazy.

 

 

[OneMoreFarang]

5 minutes ago, garyk said:

A little off topic i guess but thought I would throw this in. I keep a small home in America. Where I live several months a year. ALONE... I personally find it nice to get out of Thailand for a while each year.  

 

My neighbor living across the street from me brought his Thai wife back, and her kids. What a total mess that turned out to be. 

The neighbors are calling the police on them constantly for fighting and having junk thrown in the yard. I kid you not before I left this last time they were fined 2500 dollars. The city brought in a huge dumpster and demanded they clean up the mess in the yard. The kids ended up marring dead beats. It is a scene from a disaster movie... crazy.

Probably they have a successful YouTube channel: Living in America ????

[garyk]

11 minutes ago, OneMoreFarang said:

Probably they have a successful YouTube channel: Living in America ????

 

Haha, good one.

[baansgr]

12 hours ago, OneMoreFarang said:

Wrong!

 

It's nice to have some money to spend - not just in Thailand.

It's also important to set boundaries right from the beginning. If you meet a girl and give her all the money she wants then don't be surprised if she get's used to that and demands later all the money she wants.

 

The better way it to make it clear from the beginning that money is limited. Personally it's not that I don't help at all. But I do it seldom and with low amounts. I.e. if a sister wants to borrow 2,000B for the new school year I give her that money. But if she asks again maybe a year later then I ask her when she plans to pay back the money I gave her last time...

Over the years I spent maybe 5,000B like that per year for the family. It doesn't leave a big hole in my pocket.

 

If the beloved girlfriend thinks she wants a guy who pays more money all the time then she should for look somebody who is willing to do that. I won't!

 

Better way is to make it clear they earn their own money...why go lending Sisters money, let them budget, learn economics that they must work to buy things. If you dont mind as many others dont giving away money you worked hard for up to you, it aint for me. Stop paying your Mrs her stipend, see how long it is befor she leaves, dont say it aint about the money as it certainly is.

[ndfdjnd]

OP I'll be blunt.  You married a gold-digger.  

[ndfdjnd]

On 9/24/2018 at 4:58 AM, NCC1701A said:

And under stand this, a young Thai man has to pony up something on the first date. It is just not Farang. That is how Thai woman define themselves. The conversation with her friends about your first date is "What did he give you?"   

Not all Thai women are like this.  The easy answer to avoid these women is to insist on them paying half.  If they refuse, walk away and onto the next one.  I've had many girls get angry with me for doing this, the last one I can recall parted with "have fun with your shit life", which was nice.  But I've also had 2 girlfriends and lots of other casual partners who I did not have to pay for everytime we went anywhere.  And I knew they were only with me because they wanted to be with me, not because they wanted money or free meals.  If we all refused to pay for lazy, demanding Thai girls, they would not be so lazy and demanding.

[baansgr]

3 minutes ago, ndfdjnd said:

Not all Thai women are like this.  The easy answer to avoid these women is to insist on them paying half.  If they refuse, walk away and onto the next one.  I've had many girls get angry with me for doing this, the last one I can recall parted with "have fun with your shit life", which was nice.  But I've also had 2 girlfriends and lots of other casual partners who I did not have to pay for everytime we went anywhere.  And I knew they were only with me because they wanted to be with me, not because they wanted money or free meals.  If we all refused to pay for lazy, demanding Thai girls, they would not be so lazy and demanding.

Its the Foreigners fault for paying now???...Nuremburg springs to mind 

[ndfdjnd]

Well yeah, unless they were robbed at gunpoint.  Who else's fault is it?  It's your money, you choose how you spend it.

[baansgr]

4 minutes ago, ndfdjnd said:

Well yeah, unless they were robbed at gunpoint.  Who else's fault is it?  It's your money, you choose how you spend it.

So Thai girls are lazy because foreign men will spend money on them...? yeah, Nuremburg

[Hummin]

5 minutes ago, baansgr said:

So Thai girls are lazy because foreign men will spend money on them...? yeah, Nuremburg

No, they are just lazy, because that is how it is for some of them. Sit, look, and wait rice will grow. Fruit and food grow all year long, and they really do not need to work hard to get some food, and even better, when the stupid falang come and feed them, and make their life easier without doing nothing else than give them a release or two and say I love you to mutt. Do not need to be Einstain to figure that one out. 

 

Please read Thai Feever once more, and if not read yet, read it ????

[ndfdjnd]

7 minutes ago, baansgr said:

So Thai girls are lazy because foreign men will spend money on them...

Thai girls seeking out men who will spend money on them are lazy, yes.

[Hummin]

[sanemax]

She should be content with a bowl of porridge , but be careful not to spill any on the teak door

[samsensam]

On 9/24/2018 at 12:35 AM, BritManToo said:

The Thai government doesn't make so many 'fake' jobs for women as the USA, it doesn't give welfare payments for single moms either. So the man has to provide.

 

We've got to the situation where women in the west no longer need men, so we come here where they still need us then complain we have to pay for everything. You have two choices, pay for her, or live alone (just like the western women).

 

maybe true of your experience but certainly not true of any western woman, i or my friends, have ever dated or married and certainly not true of any thai lady i've dated. no woman i have dated has ever asked for or expected payment for being my friend or gf. i have dated some amazing thai women; doctors, lawyers, business owners,  professional business women, lecturers, i could go on.

 

just because some men, for what ever reason; they are lonely, gullible, lacking basic socila skills or whatever, are unable to attract women in the west or thailand  without having to pay them to be their gf/wife it does not mean all women; western or thai are like that.

 

if you have never dated anyone without paying them then you are missing out on some amazing women and amazing experiences in the west and thailand. quite sad really.

[sanemax]

3 minutes ago, samsensam said:

 

maybe true of your experience but certainly not true of any western woman, i or my friends, have ever dated or married and certainly not true of any thai lady i've dated. no woman i have dated has ever asked for or expected payment for being my friend or gf. i have dated some amazing thai women; doctors, lawyers, business owners,  professional business women, lecturers, i could go on.

just because some men, for what ever reason; they are lonely, gullible, lacking basic socila skills or whatever, are unable to attract women in the west or thailand  without having to pay them to be their gf/wife it does not mean all women; western or thai are like that.

if you have never dated anyone without paying them then you are missing out on some amazing women and amazing experiences in the west and thailand. quite sad really.

Its quite easy to see why you are such a big hit with the girls , you sound like quite an amazing guy .

  Do you go to the gym , look 15 years younger then you are and still have a full head of hair? 

[Hummin]

23 minutes ago, samsensam said:

 

maybe true of your experience but certainly not true of any western woman, i or my friends, have ever dated or married and certainly not true of any thai lady i've dated. no woman i have dated has ever asked for or expected payment for being my friend or gf. i have dated some amazing thai women; doctors, lawyers, business owners,  professional business women, lecturers, i could go on.

 

just because some men, for what ever reason; they are lonely, gullible, lacking basic socila skills or whatever, are unable to attract women in the west or thailand  without having to pay them to be their gf/wife it does not mean all women; western or thai are like that.

 

if you have never dated anyone without paying them then you are missing out on some amazing women and amazing experiences in the west and thailand. quite sad really.

With knownledge of so many amazing women you dating, how come you still chasing women? When you first meet a amazing woman, I mean AMAZING, you should keep her, but it seems you play a game here? Explain

[BritManToo]

1 hour ago, samsensam said:

i have dated some amazing thai women; doctors, lawyers, business owners,  professional business women, lecturers, i could go on.

And when you didn't finance their lifestyle they left, no surprise there then.

 

[tifino]

falang man marry thai wife - to make her life better

thai wife marry falang man - to make her life better

[Hummin]

7 minutes ago, tifino said:

falang man marry thai wife - to make his life better

thai wife marry falang man - to make her life better

You take care of me, I take care of you,,,,

 

fixed that for you

[tifino]

5 minutes ago, Hummin said:

You take care of me, I take care of you,,,,

 

fixed that for you

Editing the quoted loses the whole point behind what was quoted

[Hummin]

47 minutes ago, tifino said:

Editing the quoted loses the whole point behind what was quoted

Even a Falang man merry to make a better life, not to make her life better solely. Her life gets better as a bieffect of his lifes improves. 

 

Well, in some cases it goes only one way, but intention is to have a better life even for the falang! However some fails even that

[YogaVeg]

On 9/24/2018 at 6:55 AM, Hervey Bay said:

And no....I don't understand  "different" .  That is why I am posting here.....to learn the parameters.

You would be hard pressed to find a more cynical place to seek advice than here. I'm sure you've got that loud and clear by now.

 

Sheryl's advice in #24 is solid and worth serious consideration. 

 

I find many of the other posts disheartening, yet pessimism that only reflect the poster's personal experiences, judgements, and worldview. 

Noone here can possibly claim to know the color of your woman's heart. Take it all with a grain of salt.

[billd766]

On 9/24/2018 at 10:34 AM, beau thai said:

Have you read it?? Or are you another poster who doesnt like to be confused by knowledge and facts? Seems likely.

 

I read it years ago and had a good laugh over it.

 

Then I threw it away and got on with real life with my Thai girlfriend and now wife of 18 years.

 

Sure there were facts in it but remember it was written to make money and not all of it was true then or now.

 

Yes there was knowledge in it, but from the time I met my Thai girl who was then 28 until we married 7 years later I also had my own facts and knowledge and I based my life on what I knew and not what somebody else wrote in a book.

[SuperTed]

My wife is 41, and I am 20 years older, but look only 10 years older (really !).

Ok....here is part of the individual problem...she has left me, using a spurious reason, and now refuses any counselling or possibility of a reconciliation. It's awful.

 

It sounds like she has stayed with you long enough to get a green card? Go to the bookstore and look at ALL the how to books on the mechanics of divorce in your state. Once you have read that, get a lawyer and file against her for abandonment (if the lawyer agrees that is what you should do).

 

Once you have protected yourself legally, invite her to reconcile on your terms. You must assume that whatever she is doing now is part of a calculated plan taught her by a bitter single Thai gold digger with experience in US courts.

 

 

If you reconcile, read Thailand Fever with your wife. It is in English and Thai. It covers all the issues and will be enough to get you talking. It is also enough to get a “bad girl” to shut up and go away.

 

 

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