Worst Joke Ever 2024

[isaanistical]

11 minutes ago, doctormann said:

I think that earthworms - if that's what they are - are hermaphrodites so it probably wouldn't matter.

Whoah!! “wouldn't matter”? That's not a very inclusive remark, is it? The alphabet activists will get you cancelled in a heartbeat.

Anyway, I thought they were giraffes.

 

[scottiejohn]

39 minutes ago, doctormann said:

I think that earthworms - if that's what they are - are hermaphrodites so it probably wouldn't matter.

If so are they all at sea without seamen?

[WorriedNoodle]

[WorriedNoodle]

[WorriedNoodle]

[WorriedNoodle]

[ravip]

During  Sermon at a Mass, the Priest said: "If I had all the Beer in the world, I'd take it and throw it into the river".

And the congregation 
cried, "Amen! "
 
"And if I had all the Wine in the world, I'd take it and throw it in the river".

And the congregation cried: "Amen!"

 

"And if I had all the Whiskey and Rum in the world, I'd take it all and throw it in the river". 

 

Again the congregation 
cried:  "Amen!"...

 

The Priest  sat down. 

 

The Junior  Priest then stood up and said: "For our closing Hymn, let's turn to page 126 of our Hymn books and sing,  "We shall drink from the river".

 

The whole Congregation SCREAMED 
     "HALLELUJAH"!!

[ballpoint]

14 hours ago, scottiejohn said:

I was dying to say I don't usually like to "blow" my own trumpet but some times it causes my spirits to sink when things to crash about and onto you!

I see Zero return in continuing with this increasingly bombing topic, which is frankly nose diving in a downward spiral.  To do so would just be plane suicide.

[ballpoint]

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[dcsw53]

[dcsw53]

[Zyxel]

[Zyxel]

[Zyxel]

[Zyxel]

[roo860]

[VBF]

6 hours ago, ballpoint said:

Can't see it for that price ????

[Crossy]

I am of such massive age that ...

 

[Gandtee]

2 hours ago, Crossy said:

I am of such massive age that ...

 

Me too. I love the smell.

[ravip]

2 hours ago, Crossy said:

I am of such massive age that ...

 

Me too! Had two Colts complete with holsters.

[ballpoint]

[ballpoint]

A woman was sure that her husband was cheating on her, and having an affair with the maid. So she laid down a trap.

One evening she suddenly sent the maid home for the weekend and didn't tell the husband.
That night when they went to bed, the husband gave the old story: Excuse me my dear, my stomach aches, and went to the bathroom.

The wife promptly went into the maid's bed. She switched the lights off. When he came in silently, he wasted no time or words but quickly got on top of her...

When he finished and was still panting, the wife said: "You didn't expect to find me in this bed, did you?"

And then she switched on the light...

"No madam," said the gardener.

[ballpoint]

This year's Asthma Marathon will be held on the 3rd-4th-5th-6th-7th and 8th of July 2023.

[ballpoint]

To prevent anyone from desecrating his grave, Rolf Harris has been buried at sea.
The exact location is not yet known, but apparently it's between two little buoys.

[ballpoint]

Finally I have proof.
The earth is 80% water, and none of it is carbonated.
So that means the earth is flat.