Worst Joke Ever 2024

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No collar. 

Found this poor guy eating a dead rabbit on side of road. 

 

He's a little snappy struggled getting him into my car think it’s some kind of husky..…………..Please share this so we can find his owners.

[still kicking]

 

[chickenslegs]

A monkey is sitting in a tree smoking a joint when a lizard walks past and looks up and says to the monkey, “Hey! what are you doing?”

 

The monkey says, “Smoking a joint; come up and have some if you like.”

 

So the lizard climbs up and sits next to the monkey and they smoke a few doobies. After a while, the lizard says his mouth is dry and that he’s going to get a drink from the river.

 

When he gets to the river, the lizard is so stoned that he leans too far over and falls into the water.

 

A crocodile sees this, swims over to the lizard, and helps him to the side, then asks the lizard, “What’s the matter with you?”

 

The lizard explains to the crocodile that he was smoking a joint in the tree with the monkey, but that he got too stoned and then fell into the river while taking a drink.

 

The crocodile decides to check this out. He walks into the jungle and finds the tree where the monkey is sitting, finishing a joint, and he looks up and says, “Hey, you!”

 

The monkey looks down and says “Duuuuude … how much water did you drink?!”

[still kicking]

5 minutes ago, chickenslegs said:

A monkey is sitting in a tree smoking a joint when a lizard walks past and looks up and says to the monkey, “Hey! what are you doing?”

 

The monkey says, “Smoking a joint; come up and have some if you like.”

 

So the lizard climbs up and sits next to the monkey and they smoke a few doobies. After a while, the lizard says his mouth is dry and that he’s going to get a drink from the river.

 

When he gets to the river, the lizard is so stoned that he leans too far over and falls into the water.

 

A crocodile sees this, swims over to the lizard, and helps him to the side, then asks the lizard, “What’s the matter with you?”

 

The lizard explains to the crocodile that he was smoking a joint in the tree with the monkey, but that he got too stoned and then fell into the river while taking a drink.

 

The crocodile decides to check this out. He walks into the jungle and finds the tree where the monkey is sitting, finishing a joint, and he looks up and says, “Hey, you!”

 

The monkey looks down and says “Duuuuude … how much water did you drink?!”

Nice joke but lizards don't drink 

[chickenslegs]

A guy walks into a bar with a small lizard on his shoulder. He says to the barman, "One for me and one for Tiny."

 

The barman says, "Why do you call him Tiny?"

 

And the guy says, "Cuz, he's my newt."

[chickenslegs]

2 minutes ago, still kicking said:

Nice joke but lizards don't drink 

Not even after smoking a joint?

[oxo1947]

 

Joan Of Arc--It's What She Would Have Wanted !

 

 

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Edited July 16, 2023 by oxo1947

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What the f##k was I thinking

 

 

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