Worst Joke Ever 2025

[bluesofa]

1 minute ago, ballpoint said:

15 minutes ago, bluesofa said:

Then Paddy added, "Anyway, I don't want shampoo, I want realpoo."

So Murphy threw a shamrock at him.

He was obviously bricking it.

[scottiejohn]

1 minute ago, ballpoint said:

So Murphy threw a shamrock at him.

It would have been made of Paper Mache then and just dissolved!

 

[bluesofa]

Just now, scottiejohn said:

It would have been made of Paper Mache then and just dissolved!

Brown sugar would have been better, 'cos demerara.

[scottiejohn]

2 minutes ago, bluesofa said:

He was obviously bricking it.

I thought you "picked" shamrocks.  Maybe your spell checker has a little Irish gremlin or leprechaun in it!

[bluesofa]

2 minutes ago, scottiejohn said:

I thought you "picked" shamrocks.  Maybe your spell checker has a little Irish gremlin or leprechaun in it!

I picked mine off the shelf in B&Q.

[scottiejohn]

4 minutes ago, bluesofa said:

I picked mine off the shelf in B&Q.

Picking yourself in public, even in B&Q, does not count as DIY.  Use a handkerchief please.

[billd766]

1 hour ago, scottiejohn said:

Me too.

[scottiejohn]

1 hour ago, bluesofa said:

Brown sugar would have been better, 'cos demerara.

But I am much sweeter, even if more common.

 

PS;  I did not get the "demerara" bit at first.  My "pun" brain must be failing!

[ballpoint]

5 hours ago, billd766 said:

Me too.

You're obviously a man of means, by no means.

[faraday]

5 hours ago, ballpoint said:

You're obviously a man of means, by no means.

Yea, he's a real king of the road.

[WorriedNoodle]

[WorriedNoodle]

[WorriedNoodle]

[WorriedNoodle]

[WorriedNoodle]

[Andrew Dwyer]

[billd766]

12 hours ago, ballpoint said:

You're obviously a man of means, by no means.

More like a man of few or little means at the moment.

[Andrew Dwyer]

[WorriedNoodle]

[WorriedNoodle]

[WorriedNoodle]

[Andrew Dwyer]

Honesty is the best policy !!

 

[Andrew Dwyer]

When your product tastes like rats pee then you have to be inventive with your marketing !!

 

[ballpoint]

Whilst in the club the other day I got an old World War ll navy veteran to tell me about one of his exploits during his time on destroyer duty guarding the coasts of Britain, he said that one of his worst memories was when whilst out on patrol in the Atlantic, a tell tale series of blips were picked up on the underwater sonar, so as they had been taught they proceeded to drop a series of depth charges, it was after their third attack that a lookout reported a possible hit, the crew raced to the side of the ship and peered into the water, what happened next really surprised some of the old sea dogs, air bubbles, oil slicks, and pieces of wreckage surfaced, and then the strangest thing of all, about thirty dead sheep floated to the top, this so confused the crew as nothing like this had ever been reported before.
The mystery was finally cleared up two years after the war had ended, when it was revealed that they had sunk a ewe boat.

[ballpoint]

[ballpoint]

[fasteddie]

[fasteddie]

[WorriedNoodle]

[WorriedNoodle]