Worst Joke Ever 2025

[scottiejohn]

[WorriedNoodle]

[Andrew Dwyer]

Will these people never leave me in peace ☹️

[Andrew Dwyer]

I had a yoghurt called Beverley !!

[Andrew Dwyer]

[Andrew Dwyer]

[Andrew Dwyer]

...and you are spending way too much time looking at this photo !!............ quick ! move on , the wife is behind you !!

[Andrew Dwyer]

Got to get myself one of those !!

[Andrew Dwyer]

Excellent advice !!........ ( you will not find here ).

[Andrew Dwyer]

Maybe in Chernobyl ??

[Andrew Dwyer]

Must have been a fork in the road !!



Think it’s trying to tell you something ??

[fasteddie]

[fasteddie]

[WorriedNoodle]

[scottiejohn]

1 hour ago, WorriedNoodle said:

Sorry about that.  I just acted on impulse without thinking

[chickenslegs]

13 hours ago, Andrew Dwyer said:

...and you are spending way too much time looking at this photo !!............ quick ! move on , the wife is behind you !!

I was scrolling up and down rapidly - hoping they would bounce.

[chickenslegs]

Time for some wise words from the Scots ...

 

“In Scotland we have mixed feelings about Global Warming. Because we all get to sit on the mountains and watch the English drown.” – Frankie Boyle

 

“Las Vegas and Glasgow have a lot in common. they’re the only two places in the world where you can pay for sex with chips.” – Frankie Boyle

 

“Nobody thought Mel Gibson could play a Scot but look at him now! Alcoholic and a racist!” – Frankie Boyle

 

“There will be a lot of people who will wonder what does a true Scotsman wear under his kilt. I can tell you a true Scotsman will never tell you what he wears under his kilt, but he will show you at the drop of a hat” – Fred MacCaulay

 

Man walks into a Glasgow pub and asks for a pint of lager with a dash of lime.

“We don’t do cocktails,” replies the barman.” - Anon

 

[WorriedNoodle]

[WorriedNoodle]

[Andrew Dwyer]

Just to keep Man U fans happy a new group has been made.

[Andrew Dwyer]

Modern family life !!

[scottiejohn]

10 hours ago, chickenslegs said:

There will be a lot of people who will wonder what does a true Scotsman wear under his kilt. I can tell you a true Scotsman will never tell you what he wears under his kilt

There is nothing worn under a Scotsman's kilt as everything is in perfect working order.

 

PS;  Being the modest Scot I am I should know and can vouch for that statement being true (along with every other Scot).

[scottiejohn]

10 hours ago, chickenslegs said:

I was scrolling up and down rapidly

Is scrolling the correct word for that activity?

[ballpoint]

[ballpoint]

DIY has become so much easier since I found this

[ballpoint]

One for the intaleckshals intalektuals interlekchewals smartarses.

 

[chickenslegs]

Last will and testament ...

 

"I, being of sound mind, make the following gifts.

To my beautiful, sweet wife,  Doris, I leave my house, my Manhattan apartment, and two million dollars in cash and shares. Enjoy darling.

To my handsome and hardworking son Paul, I leave my Lexus and $800,000 in cash. Keep up the good work, Paul.

To my gorgeous and clever daughter Suzanne, I leave my Jaguar and $600,000 in cash. I love you, darling Suzy.

And, finally, to my brother Henry, who always told me in no uncertain terms that 'health' is so much more important than 'wealth', I leave my exercise bike and treadmill."

 

If my dead body is ever found on a jogging trail, or in a gym, please inform the police that I was murdered somewhere else and my body was dumped there.

[Andrew Dwyer]

arriba arriba ándale ándale !!

[Andrew Dwyer]

Warning !!
No dice games with squirrels allowed !!

[Andrew Dwyer]

Time for some family bonding !!

Bonding !! Bonding !!

Did you see what I did there ??






Ahh, forget it ☹️