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I used a bum gun for the first time

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4 hours ago, AboutThaim said:

Eucalyptus leaves in Oz when caught short in the bush.

Have heard of someone using nettle leaves I seem to remember. 555

Spinifex if you are in North-West Australia. A tad prickly.

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  • I think the bum gun gets you cleaner than toilet paper, especially when your finger goes through the paper and ends up covered in shit, Then you have problem that maybe your toilet gets

  • Bum gun every time. Using toilet paper I now find extremely unhygenic.

  • Once you get the aim of the bum gun sorted out, you will find using the bum gun a much cleaner process than using toilet paper.

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I’m this shit is funny.... 14 pages as of now and no pissing matches yet... 

In the UK I put a hot/cold bidet in the master bathroom. Now that's luxury. 

Using a bumgun is OK, I do it, but the pressure needs to be high enough to clean right up to the O-ring, and this means when your wife/gf wants to use it to sprinkle her lady garden, it's going to give her a nasty bite. ???? ????

7 hours ago, AboutThaim said:

Have heard of someone using nettle leaves I seem to remember. 555

I expect he does too ????

 

"I don't want to know why you can't. I want to know how you can!"

4 minutes ago, Speedhump said:

Using a bumgun is OK, I do it, but the pressure needs to be high enough to clean right up to the O-ring, and this means when your wife/gf wants to use it to sprinkle her lady garden, it's going to give her a nasty bite. ????????

Perhaps need "his 'n' hers" bum-guns..?

19 minutes ago, Speedhump said:

sprinkle her lady garden

Classic.

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4 hours ago, 55Jay said:

Bum Gunners are members of an elite club.  Prerequisites are a general knowledge of physics and geometry, moderate dexterity and finesses, and the ability to identify, analyze and adapt to several biologic and mechanical variables. 

 

I've been a Club qualifying examiner for 20+ years, and have seen shit you wouldn't believe.  

 

However, the most common method used by aspiring members is the Sit, Spray and Pray method (SSP), with predictable results.  Or so you would think.

 

This is where we separate the men from the boys. 

 

Executing the default SSP 3-times in a row, anticipating different results without any adjustments being made, is immediate disqualification. 

 

The failed applicant is escorted out the back door, head hung low, leaving wet, squishy foot prints as they trod off to rejoin the unwashed masses in General Poopulation.

adorable-baby-boy-playing-toilet-paper-74570872.jpg.554ce8670cd3f96c9e8b95472ba445ff.jpg

 

 

As poster #4 with 34 'likes' and 7 'thanks' I claim automatic membership of the Bum Gunners Club.

9 hours ago, baz69er said:

The bum gun is one of the things I miss about Thailand when I go home & I would certainly would have one fitted if I had a wet room, a mate of mine who is a veteran of the bum gun let me into a little secret of his, if you push the head of the gun up close to your ring piece & fire the jet of water up there for a while you get a free colon irrigation, but I would only advise this in your own one at home & not in public toilets.

Mate of mine said he was once in a spa bath and backed up on one of the jets to get his two veg thoroughly washed.  Got too close with his ring gear and the jet gave his rectum a thorough clean out into the spa bath.  May have needed a shower after that.

Mate of mine said he was once in a spa bath and backed up on one of the jets to get his two veg thoroughly washed.  Got too close with his ring gear and the jet gave his rectum a thorough clean out into the spa bath.  May have needed a shower after that.
Hope he didn't tell the next person getting in the bath!

Sent from my SM-G920F using Thailand Forum - Thaivisa mobile app

4 hours ago, Speedhump said:

In the UK I put a hot/cold bidet in the master bathroom. Now that's luxury. 

Using a bumgun is OK, I do it, but the pressure needs to be high enough to clean right up to the O-ring, and this means when your wife/gf wants to use it to sprinkle her lady garden, it's going to give her a nasty bite. ????????

There are some bum gun aficionados who are rather adept at gargling at the same time as flossing the crack. All I can say is that's pretty impressive o-ring technology. With regard to following, please do not try this at home.

 

https://www.stickboybkk.com/videos/bum-gun-tear-new-arse/

On 2/8/2019 at 7:58 PM, HighPriority said:

In Australia even Bunnings stock bum guns, let alone the specialist plumbing suppliers !

What tinpot back alley do you call home ?

England, unfortunately ????

21 hours ago, lust said:

You know, there’s a laughing emoticon you can use instead of bumping a thread with an ‘lol’. ????

Thanks for that.

hey...the bum gun debate is no laughing matter...

 

years ago an associate returned home to little england from an asian overseas posting and decided to install a bum gun in his bathroom...and then his wife appeared indignantly to ask what he was doing and he explained...and then she said 'yer crazy, over my dead body...our friends and guests will have a look and then we will be a laughing stock...' 'then maybe yew should get some new friends and not associate with ignorant western savages...' the bum gun experience had broadened his cultural understanding beyond normal western acceptability...

 

and that's all that it took for their marriage to dissolve into bum gun water...granted their marriage wasn't in very good shape anyway...marriages destroyed, children without fathers, and etc resulting from alternative toilet hygiene and xenophobic western resistance thereto...

 

 

6 minutes ago, tutsiwarrior said:

hey...the bum gun debate is no laughing matter...

 

years ago an associate returned home to little england from an asian overseas posting and decided to install a bum gum in his bathroom...and then his wife appeared indignantly to ask what he was doing and he explained...and then she said 'yer crazy, over my dead body...our friends and guests will have a look and then we will be a laughing stock...' 'then maybe yew should get some new friends and not associate with ignorant western savages...'

 

and that's all that it took for their marriage to dissolve into bum gun water...granted their marriage wasn't in very good shape anyway...marriages destroyed, children without fathers, and etc resulting from alternative toilet hygiene and the western resistance thereto...

 

 

As you say, surely there was a lot more to it than that. I'm thinking he used to eat sitting on the floor in front of the TV, drive with a death wish, complain about the lack of a local walking street, etc. 'Going home' can be a culture shock. ???? ????

 So apart from the hygiene thing, which I'm fully on board with, there is, and yes I'm gonna get Green here, the huge reduction in toilet tissue usage....we could save the planet with all those trees not being cut down to make toilet tissue to wipe our asses with!

 

My local Costco would go outta business if we all used them!

On 2/9/2019 at 9:47 AM, Dene16 said:

Even installed one back in the UK, so much cleaner. Toilet paper now just for show

Does it have warm water then too? Or cold?

On 2/9/2019 at 6:09 PM, Spidey said:

Sorry sir, I'm just a poor boy, from a poor family, we didn't have a bum gun in our house when I was a kid. We had cut up newspapers on a hook next to the bog. Don't think Mummy and Daddy would be able to help.

None of us had even seen a bum gun before we came to the LOS and Mummy and Daddy bought the newspapers.

 

You don't need wealth to have a hand held bidet. You can pick one up in a supermarket appliance dept for around 89 baht and with a few basic tools, plumbing fittings and some Plumbers Mate tape you can fit one and be using it in less than an hour.

 

With what you save on newspapers and toilet rolls It will pay for itself in a few months easily.

8 hours ago, tabarin said:
On ‎2‎/‎9‎/‎2019 at 9:47 AM, Dene16 said:

Even installed one back in the UK, so much cleaner. Toilet paper now just for show

Does it have warm water then too? Or cold?

In the UK you need a long run of supply piping installed in a "warm space".

This then limits the amount of comfortable water you have available (so prevents you wasting too much water), but God help you if you're the next person to use it....

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