Do You Avoid Silom/suk When With Your Gf

[dantilley]

Ask some of your friends while you sit in the alternative Thailand that opperates on a different frequency to this Thailand.

OK, will do, thanks.

[somtaamgaiyang]

I rarely start posts, but I have a bug up my ass due to a few recent encounters and I just fee like venting/commiserating a bit.

How many board members are married/currently in, or have been in, a serious relationship with a Thai girl and experienced some level or stereotyping based on the misconception that all Thai girls with Western men are/were prostitutes?

Not to imply that my GF is more special or better than someone else's, but she is so d**n riap roy and proper that it drives me nuts when someone thinks she is a working girl – and it really, really upsets her. I now find myself avoiding some of my favorite places to eat on Suk when I am with her because of this issue.

I did stress to her early in our relationship that she would experience this, be she is having a hard time with it, and I must confess that I am as well. This is not my first GF in Thailand by a long shot, but this is the first I am very, very serious about.

Clearly, this is not an issue that can be cleared up, you can either deal with it or you can't. However, I was also wondering if I was alone in avoiding whole sections of town when with the GF, or do others do that as well?

I think it wasn't a very smart idea to let her know that this is an issue to YOU. You knowing that she may experience this is very different from telling her it is going to happen. She is probably as paranoid as hel_l about it now, and putting a lot of ideas into her head from probably very inoccuous issues.

If she is that riap roy, 99% of people would not think it at all, and as for eating wherever you want on Sukhumvit, I presume you aren't taking to to Nana so no issue at all.

[erikr_]

I do remember that it is not unusual in thailand for staff of the hotels to check with the thais girls.

I remember once when we were in pattaya, we went back to the hotel at about 1am and my wife was checked by one of the staff and I had to explain to him that she is my wife. She got a bit upset and angry with the guy, but I explained to my wife that she need not get angry, coz it is his job to do so and there is indeed a need to do so. She got better then.

I don't really blame those people actually. It is not really unnatural to think that way. As long as they don't really become rude and think of themselves as superior and can do anything they like to us, it would be fine for me.

Even if it does in fact was a prostitute, they have no right to look down on anyone. Respect others!

remember one of the first business trips my wife joint me where I had checked in to the 5* hotel (for a media evaluation) and we had been brought up to the suite by the manager. As we were hungry my wife and I went out for dinner. On return the security guard at the elevator (who we had passed just an hour before) had the guts to ask my wife for her id.

I just told him short and bondy who she was and before he could say anymore we were in the elevator. I guess you can imagine the lunch meeting I had the next day with the manager and the utmost respect paid to my wife by the security guard the remainder of the stay.

It doesn't really bother me what people speak, I know better. However in the hotel the staff better give her the respect she deserves as a guest

[siamamerican]

I do remember that it is not unusual in thailand for staff of the hotels to check with the thais girls.

I remember once when we were in pattaya, we went back to the hotel at about 1am and my wife was checked by one of the staff and I had to explain to him that she is my wife. She got a bit upset and angry with the guy, but I explained to my wife that she need not get angry, coz it is his job to do so and there is indeed a need to do so. She got better then.

I don't really blame those people actually. It is not really unnatural to think that way. As long as they don't really become rude and think of themselves as superior and can do anything they like to us, it would be fine for me.

Even if it does in fact was a prostitute, they have no right to look down on anyone. Respect others!

remember one of the first business trips my wife joint me where I had checked in to the 5* hotel (for a media evaluation) and we had been brought up to the suite by the manager. As we were hungry my wife and I went out for dinner. On return the security guard at the elevator (who we had passed just an hour before) had the guts to ask my wife for her id.

I just told him short and bondy who she was and before he could say anymore we were in the elevator. I guess you can imagine the lunch meeting I had the next day with the manager and the utmost respect paid to my wife by the security guard the remainder of the stay.

It doesn't really bother me what people speak, I know better. However in the hotel the staff better give her the respect she deserves as a guest

It might have been awkward for the security guard to ask for the ID. The man wasn't doing it for fun. It is his job to protect the guests and getting ID makes it harder on criminals.

I wouldn't feel so proud about the meeting you had with the manager and I assume your complaints in regards to the security guard doing his job. If it were me, I would've politely explained to the man that this is my wife and there is no need to check her ID. I would have then thanked him for his concern. When in Rome do as...

My wife has been asked for ID many times. We sometimes explain our relationship or she just gives her ID. The fact that it's a US green card terminates the process. She has never been insulted by the process. We both try to not elevate ourselves above others, because of the fact that we have enough money to enjoy nice restaurants and hotels.

[kiakaha]

I do remember that it is not unusual in thailand for staff of the hotels to check with the thais girls.

I remember once when we were in pattaya, we went back to the hotel at about 1am and my wife was checked by one of the staff and I had to explain to him that she is my wife. She got a bit upset and angry with the guy, but I explained to my wife that she need not get angry, coz it is his job to do so and there is indeed a need to do so. She got better then.

I don't really blame those people actually. It is not really unnatural to think that way. As long as they don't really become rude and think of themselves as superior and can do anything they like to us, it would be fine for me.

Even if it does in fact was a prostitute, they have no right to look down on anyone. Respect others!

remember one of the first business trips my wife joint me where I had checked in to the 5* hotel (for a media evaluation) and we had been brought up to the suite by the manager. As we were hungry my wife and I went out for dinner. On return the security guard at the elevator (who we had passed just an hour before) had the guts to ask my wife for her id.

I just told him short and bondy who she was and before he could say anymore we were in the elevator. I guess you can imagine the lunch meeting I had the next day with the manager and the utmost respect paid to my wife by the security guard the remainder of the stay.

It doesn't really bother me what people speak, I know better. However in the hotel the staff better give her the respect she deserves as a guest

My wife :

1) doesn't understand the thai language when they ask for id at hotels,clubs etc.. and baselesly presume she understands what the hel_l they are saying

and

2) uses her NZL passport as id. It is priceless

[bkkmadness]

I wouldn't be giving out my girlfriend's/wife's ID to a security guard when we are guests at the hotel.

[britmaveric]

I wouldn't be giving out my girlfriend's/wife's ID to a security guard when we are guests at the hotel.

Well I've never had a problem with Ms. Brit, but then again I always stay the same spots and they've known us for years. I wouldn't take offense nor would she once you explain it to the security guard.

Then I've had mates (ladies) spend the nite when to legless and funny enuf they never ask, so go figure.

[blizzard]

tell the girl to lighten up. we all know why most farangs go to thailand.............lol. and other asian men too, but they dont stand out.

[mickynoikalw]

I rarely start posts, but I have a bug up my ass due to a few recent encounters and I just fee like venting/commiserating a bit.

How many board members are married/currently in, or have been in, a serious relationship with a Thai girl and experienced some level or stereotyping based on the misconception that all Thai girls with Western men are/were prostitutes?

Not to imply that my GF is more special or better than someone else's, but she is so d**n riap roy and proper that it drives me nuts when someone thinks she is a working girl – and it really, really upsets her. I now find myself avoiding some of my favorite places to eat on Suk when I am with her because of this issue.

I did stress to her early in our relationship that she would experience this, be she is having a hard time with it, and I must confess that I am as well. This is not my first GF in Thailand by a long shot, but this is the first I am very, very serious about.

Clearly, this is not an issue that can be cleared up, you can either deal with it or you can't. However, I was also wondering if I was alone in avoiding whole sections of town when with the GF, or do others do that as well?

yeah this annoys the hel_l out of me;I met my girl through work in the UK ; poeple are so narrow minded they automatically think thai=prostitute

[Maigo6]

yeah this annoys the hel_l out of me;I met my girl through work in the UK ; poeple are so narrow minded they automatically think thai=prostitute

Same as they think that 90% of the men that travel alone to Thailand are sex tourists, whatever next!

[blizzard]

its not narrow minded to think thai girl with funny looking farang is not tradtional relationship if its true, and in a lot of cases it is true.

this is thailand peeple. peple think same same in usa, not so common though, young girl with middle age to old man walking the streets just doesnt happen in usa.

UNLESS ITS FATHER ANd DAUGHTER..............lol.

Edited September 10, 2007 by blizzard

[Maigo6]

young girl with middle age to old man walking the streets just doesnt happen in usa.

Oh really, unless of course you happen to be rich, then they don't walk much anyway do they.

Blizzard, I can't work you out, I wonder if you have ever been to Thailand at all, have you ?

Edited September 10, 2007 by Maigo6

[Scott]

I never take the wife or the girlfriend in those areas. I only take the boyfriend!

It would be so embarassing if they all met!

[Wolfie]

This thread is degenerating into insults and flames... i would hate to have to close it down and have to issue warnings...

Can we keep things civil? This is your final warning. Thanks!

[Furbie]

This thread is degenerating into insults and flames... i would hate to have to close it down and have to issue warnings...

Can we keep things civil? This is your final warning. Thanks!

Wolfie,

Out of curiosity, how many people in one thread do you have to call a c.unt before you get issued a warning?

[britmaveric]

Yes the thread is coming to an uneventful end.

[Furbie]

So, if your knowledge of Suk and Silom is only about the bars, then it is a pretty easy assumption that is where you spend your time.

only a c.unt would make such an assumption.

1. i dont eat in expensive restaurants. i just eat inside shopping malls and in local resterants and perfer to cook by myself.

2. my knowledge of red light districts is that it is bars, that is all i was aware of

so how from these two facts do you come to the conclusion that "i should spend less time going to bars"? what if i told you i live in bangkapi and havent been in either of these areas in two years?

it just seems to me like only a complete c.unt would come up with this of rationalization because on the internet people take out their life frustrations on others.

Are you capable of engaging in a thread without insulting those who disagree with you; especially when you are wrong and it is quite obvious? It seems to be you are the one who takes out your frustrations on others. By your own admission, you used to go two years ago , so why so upset now?

By the way, even two years ago one did not need to eat at these establishments to know they exist, one needed to merely open their eyes and look around. If your experience is limited to Soi 4, then you won’t have seen them, but if you venture up a little, you will – though how you could miss Tony Romas is beyond me. And if you are not aware of that, why are you making blanket statements about others, seeing as it upsets you so much when they are made about you?

Let’s see if you can defend your position without degenerating into vulgarity.

[Furbie]

I rarely start posts, but I have a bug up my ass due to a few recent encounters and I just fee like venting/commiserating a bit.

How many board members are married/currently in, or have been in, a serious relationship with a Thai girl and experienced some level or stereotyping based on the misconception that all Thai girls with Western men are/were prostitutes?

Not to imply that my GF is more special or better than someone else's, but she is so d**n riap roy and proper that it drives me nuts when someone thinks she is a working girl – and it really, really upsets her. I now find myself avoiding some of my favorite places to eat on Suk when I am with her because of this issue.

I did stress to her early in our relationship that she would experience this, be she is having a hard time with it, and I must confess that I am as well. This is not my first GF in Thailand by a long shot, but this is the first I am very, very serious about.

Clearly, this is not an issue that can be cleared up, you can either deal with it or you can't. However, I was also wondering if I was alone in avoiding whole sections of town when with the GF, or do others do that as well?

I think it wasn't a very smart idea to let her know that this is an issue to YOU. You knowing that she may experience this is very different from telling her it is going to happen. She is probably as paranoid as hel_l about it now, and putting a lot of ideas into her head from probably very inoccuous issues.

If she is that riap roy, 99% of people would not think it at all, and as for eating wherever you want on Sukhumvit, I presume you aren't taking to to Nana so no issue at all.

While I understand your position, I believe it is better to be honest with someone when I am in a serious relationship. Discussing my feelings is a part of that, and opens the way to an honest dialogue. I also feel it helped her to prepare mentally to problems that WILL/DID arrive down the future.

[Dustoff]

Ahh, too much fun..

I actually thought this thread would not go far before the roaches came out of the woodwork looking for bits of rotting flesh but the posts got into the eighties before that happened. One may be tempted to consider this a successful thread?

My Thai wife and I are 37/67 and have been together long enough to have experienced most of the above situations not only in the cities and countryside of Thailand but the same over many months of travel throughout the United States. What we have discovered is that they are almost infrequent enough to be of no issue.

When we were first together (6+ yrs ago), I noticed looks that could easily have been interpreted by me as being backed by some negative judgment and my concern was not for myself (I am way past leading my life in accordance with the opinions/judgments of others) but for my newly found love.

She, being very into her Taiwanese Buddhism, carefully explained to me that if we think that other's are judging us on our looks alone, our interpretation could be completely wrong - and if we judge them on their 'looks' alone, we are projecting the very same negative energy that we fear.

Just as every single one of us on these forums, people are going to think what they want to/must think - and just as we cannot usually know what they are thinking when they look at us, they really have no idea who we are or what we are about.

My wife came up with a good one: just for fun, if someone seems to delivering visual hate-mail, we turn together, look at them, give a genuinely warm smile and wave hello. Drives them nuts and we politely wait til we are out of eyesight to have a giggle...

ps - We have actually made good Thai friends this way and it turned out that their looks were touched with awe, not disrespect. As a leathered, long-haired, bearded, black-booted biker long ago (still) in the far southern U.S., I know all about stares - and how to make friends with the people behind the stares...

Live it and love it or lose it, folks...

Edited September 10, 2007 by Dustoff

[Maigo6]

Yes the thread is coming to an uneventful end.

And that's different to all other threads?

[JimmyCA]

I rarely start posts, but I have a bug up my ass due to a few recent encounters and I just fee like venting/commiserating a bit.

How many board members are married/currently in, or have been in, a serious relationship with a Thai girl and experienced some level or stereotyping based on the misconception that all Thai girls with Western men are/were prostitutes?

Not to imply that my GF is more special or better than someone else's, but she is so d**n riap roy and proper that it drives me nuts when someone thinks she is a working girl – and it really, really upsets her. I now find myself avoiding some of my favorite places to eat on Suk when I am with her because of this issue.

I did stress to her early in our relationship that she would experience this, be she is having a hard time with it, and I must confess that I am as well. This is not my first GF in Thailand by a long shot, but this is the first I am very, very serious about.

Clearly, this is not an issue that can be cleared up, you can either deal with it or you can't. However, I was also wondering if I was alone in avoiding whole sections of town when with the GF, or do others do that as well?

It is her country, let her deal with it.

Truth be told most thai/farang relationships fit the sterotype you describe. Change all to most in the OP and add a little maipenrai.

[Maigo6]

Clearly, this is not an issue that can be cleared up, you can either deal with it or you can't.

Well, it certainly gives me sleepless nights. I was actually contemplating killing myself because of what some total stranger may think of my relationship with another human being.

[Furbie]

Clearly, this is not an issue that can be cleared up, you can either deal with it or you can't.

Well, it certainly gives me sleepless nights. I was actually contemplating killing myself because of what some total stranger may think of my relationship with another human being.

Please do it quickly and completely.