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Shamus and Murphy fancied a pint or two but didn't

have a lot of money. Between them, they could only

raise the staggering sum of 50 pence.

Murphy said "Hang on, I have an idea." He went next

door to the butcher's shop and came out with one

large sausage.

Shamus said "Are you crazy? Now we don't have any

money left at all".

Murphy replied "Don't worry - just follow me." He

went into the pub where he immediately ordered two

pints of Guinness and two glasses of Jamieson Whiskey.

Shamus said "Now you've lost it. Do you know how

much trouble we will be in? We haven't got any money".

Murphy replied, with a smile "Don't worry, I have a plan. Cheers!"

They downed their drinks.

Murphy said "OK, I'll stick the sausage through my

zipper and you go on your knees and put it in your mouth".

Said and done, the barman noticed them, went berserk

and threw them out.

They continued this, pub after pub, getting more and

more drunk all for free.

At the tenth pub Shamus said "Murphy - I don't think

I can do any more o'this. I'm pissed and me knees

are killin' me!"

Murphy said "How do you think I feel? I lost the

sausage in the third pub."

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