I Killed A Dog

[borracho]

One time years ago I had a fat doe jump into the side of my VW dasher. Minor damage to the car but the doe was severely injured. I whipped out my trusty swiss army knife stood on her and cut her throat! I came back with my pickup truck loaded her in.

I ate her liver that night sauteed with onions. The rest of her was good eating too.

[qwertz]

I ran over a man once; he was thrown out of a pub just as I was driving by. Actually, he rolled over the bonnet and came feet first through the windscreen. I rolled him onto the pavement with a little help from passers by and somebody called the cops and ambulance as he appeared to be dead. There was the usual crowd of rubbernecks milling around when the police got there and after they were dispersed the police asked where the victim was. So I pointed to the spot where he lay but - he'd disappeared. The police were not pleased, I guess I should sat on the guy till they arrived.

Edited May 16, 2007 by qwertz

[kmart]

One time years ago I had a fat doe jump into the side of my VW dasher. Minor damage to the car but the doe was severely injured. I whipped out my trusty swiss army knife stood on her and cut her throat! I came back with my pickup truck loaded her in.

I ate her liver that night sauteed with onions. The rest of her was good eating too.

Sure you didn't have fava beans and a nice Chianti too, Dr Lecter?

[chinthee]

Apart from the chicken that almost killed me, I have another true story about dogs trying to kill me.

About 5 years ago, I used to ride my bicycle on long morning trips in Phuket from our beach village, on the road north. In those days, the stray dogs had really gotten out of control and there were big groups of them by the side of the road. These roadside dogs always made me uneasy as I passed them, but I tried not to look at them, and only occassionally one might bark or give a short chase. However, at that time above Laem Sing beach on one of the mountain passes, the beach restaurants used to dump their garbage sacks on the roadside waiting for pickup in the mornings. This became a feeding frenzy for stray dogs. As I was peddling home up the pass one morning, I passed what must have been 30-40 dogs snacking on the delights there. By chance, one of the dogs had a hair up its ass and started to growl at me and gave chase...next thing I know, the ENTIRE pack started to bark, growl and chase me. I never knew I could pedal so fast uphill, and despite the pack closing on me within a meter or so, was able to outrun them at the next downhill portion. It took me about 30 minutes to get my heart rate down, and not from the pedaling. That cooled me on cycling for a few months, but luckily, after that, they started cleaning up the dogs a bit.

[Momo8]

They should put some signs up!