Age Gap Relationships... in the Later Years? (Opinions/Experiences Sought)

[OneMoreFarang]

I think one thing people always forget when they talk about older people is the fact that many older people live happily together with other older people.

Does i.e. a 60 year old woman gets horny when she sees her 60 year old husband naked? Maybe, maybe not.

But when they love each other then sooner or later the physical appearance is not so important anymore. 

 

Some of us, especially men, look for pretty and cute girls when they start a relationship. But do they dump her if she is not so pretty and cute anymore? As far as I know that happens, but I wouldn't call it typical behavior. Some dump them because when they get old they are nagging all the time - not because of their look.

 

Many girls and women seem to be not so much interested in the look of a guy. Maybe they see this successful/rich guy and they get horny, I don't know how it works. But apparently it does work. 

 

[zzaa09]

8 hours ago, Gottfrid said:

You tink too mutt!

....or at all. 

[Mac Mickmanus]

1 hour ago, OneMoreFarang said:

Really?

Is Aranyaprathet a farang tourist area? I knew a businessman and coffee-shop owner who lived there and who had several wives and girlfriends under 18. And that went on for many years. And it seems everybody though it was completely normal.

Otherwise I am not much up country and don't know much about how they live.

OK, once again we move onto underage girls 

[Mac Mickmanus]

4 hours ago, BangkokReady said:

Without the age gap, if it was 70 and 75 rather than 55 and 75, would you be any better taken care of? Or would it, in either scenario, be your money and your kids that are really the only ones looking out for you?

 

Although I believe that part of the deal with a much older guy and a very young girl from the North East, is that she provides sex and companionship until he becomes very old, then would care for him until death and gets everything.

 

The main difference is possibly not the care, so much as once you become decrepit, will your younger wife run off with a 50 something Thai man? I suppose if she's waiting for a payout, perhaps not.

Well, yes .

And older guy employs a unqualified  full time career and gets to have sex as well .  

  I just hope that the guys make provisions for her after they die , otherwise she will end up a 40 something trying to earn a living in bars 

[BritManToo]

19 minutes ago, Mac Mickmanus said:

OK, once again we move onto underage girls 

Age of consent of girlfriends/lovers is 15 in Thailand.

16 in the UK, not that much different IMHO.

 

Edited April 5, 2022 by BritManToo

[Guest Isaanlife]

4 hours ago, BangkokReady said:

Without the age gap, if it was 70 and 75 rather than 55 and 75, would you be any better taken care of? Or would it, in either scenario, be your money and your kids that are really the only ones looking out for you?

 

Although I believe that part of the deal with a much older guy and a very young girl from the North East, is that she provides sex and companionship until he becomes very old, then would care for him until death and gets everything.

 

The main difference is possibly not the care, so much as once you become decrepit, will your younger wife run off with a 50 something Thai man? I suppose if she's waiting for a payout, perhaps not.

You have an odd obsession with bringing sex into this conversation?

 

Perhaps you should seek out monogamous couples that have been married 30, 40, 50 years and ask them how important sex was to them sustaining a marriage for so many years?

 

You might really learn the answer you are seeking even though you keep trying to convince yourself it is sexually related.

 

An old tale comes to mind "Newlyweds put a penny in a jar every time they have sex the first year. They remove a penny every time they have sex from year 2 onward. By the time death is upon them, the jar is still full with many pennies".

 

Understanding that, I think you could rationalize couples that spend their entire lives together have much more in common than sex. 

 

Regardless of any age difference.

 

[Reposed]

8 hours ago, OneMoreFarang said:

She does not have lots of life experience and she does likely not have much ballast.

Most Asian women don't have much ballast, and I prefer a little ballast myself.....????

 

 

[LaosLover]

I'm 69. My best friend is 50. I hang out with his female friends sometimes and have even had a mini-crush or two.

 

But the feeling aint mutual. a woman at age 50 does not see me as a romantic partner or sexual entity. 58 is their age cutoff, they're not even discussing 60. To them, I am a caretaking liability time bomb.

 

Likewise, my own acceptable age range is compressing. At 69, I'd love to go 10 years younger, but I don't really ever see myself going 10 years older.  

 

Therefore, I think exactly the same way as the 50 year old women I meet who find me entertaining enough, but wouldn't do me on a dare. Everyone is always nexting someone.

 

I agree -but can't really say why- that an age 40-60 age gap is doable in a way that 50-70 is not. But that may just be wishful thinking all around.

[BangkokReady]

2 hours ago, RichardColeman said:

BUT the wife has two previous daughters now, 16 and 18, she has already said she will tell them to marry a farang 40 up when they graduate ! Though I kind of get this Asian idea of marrying an established person now.

Is that purely for money, or does the way they will be treated come into it also?

 

Although I understand that most Thai girls prefer Thai men, I'm often surprised by this given how some Thai men behave. In other countries with similar conditions, foreign men, even a bit older, are seen as preferable not just due to money but also the way they will treat the girl. I think some Thai women are waking up to this fact, although it often seems to take some personal experience.

[BangkokReady]

41 minutes ago, LaosLover said:

But the feeling aint mutual. a woman at age 50 does not see me as a romantic partner or sexual entity. 58 is their age cutoff, they're not even discussing 60. To them, I am a caretaking liability time bomb.

But what if you'd had a relationship for 30 years at that point and had a family together? Presumably they might then think differently?

Edited April 5, 2022 by BangkokReady

[Gottfrid]

10 hours ago, BangkokReady said:

More uncommon than the West?

 

Generally, sure, but I feel like it's more common and acceptable in Thailand.  Possibly more acceptable in most of Asia.

 

But isn't that more acceptable in Thailand that in the West?

It´s just that the posters quoted you missed to calculate with a very common thing. Many husbands in Thailand that marry a woman of same age, they will later in life have an extra doll on the side. Then the age difference their will be accepted. That will make it more or less equal to the foreigners in Thailand too. Just that it took longer for the Thai man to understand the younger model was the better choice.

[BangkokReady]

2 hours ago, OneMoreFarang said:

Many girls and women seem to be not so much interested in the look of a guy. Maybe they see this successful/rich guy and they get horny, I don't know how it works. But apparently it does work. 

Certainly the female to male attraction works differently to male to female attraction. It's more about some form of provision for women, while for men it's more about fertility. Hence we don't see so many age-gap relationships where the man is much younger than the woman.

 

Just not sure if it works as far as 50 & 70.

[BangkokReady]

4 minutes ago, Gottfrid said:

It´s just that the posters quoted you missed to calculate with a very common thing. Many husbands in Thailand that marry a woman of same age, they will later in life have an extra doll on the side. Then the age difference their will be accepted. That will make it more or less equal to the foreigners in Thailand too. Just that it took longer for the Thai man to understand the younger model was the better choice.

I obviously can't rule out that any young girl I see with an older guy is a Mia Noi.

 

I wonder if women factor this in to decision making. Marry an older guy, then he won't run off with a younger girl (or employ one wasting money that could be hers) when she gets older?

[Gottfrid]

5 minutes ago, BangkokReady said:

I obviously can't rule out that any young girl I see with an older guy is a Mia Noi.

 

I wonder if women factor this in to decision making. Marry an older guy, then he won't run off with a younger girl (or employ one wasting money that could be hers) when she gets older?

I would say it´s more about the money. Where he runs, they usually do not care about as long as he is financially stable, which is more likely to be an older man. Later he dies and they inherit everything. At that point they usually start to stay with men their own age again.

[Chelseafan]

7 hours ago, GinBoy2 said:

I'm sorry, but are we talking love or sex?

 

Regardless of where folks come from there is not a 20 something woman who finds a 50/60ish guy attractive in any sexual way.

 

Men delude themselves whichever way they can to believe the opposite.

 

Watch Thai lakorns, the Mia Noi is always f***cking some young dude her age, and unfortunately art probably reflects reality

Rubbish

I'm not saying it's common but women are complicated creatures and there are those who like much older men...

 

[BangkokReady]

3 minutes ago, Chelseafan said:

I'm not saying it's common but women are complicated creatures and there are those who like much older men...

I was watching a YouTube video recently and someone mentioned they had a female friend who went to an academic event and found the guy organising/running the event to be incredibly attractive.  She later met him again at another event, but this time he was not organising it.  The second time she viewed him as being nothing special at all.  Weird.

[OneMoreFarang]

3 hours ago, Mac Mickmanus said:

OK, once again we move onto underage girls 

Maybe you missed it, this was/is about a Thai businessman with much younger wife and girlfriends for many years. Which, according to some people here, doesn't happen.

There must have been at least hundreds of people who knew about this situation, because it was very public, and it seems nobody cared. 

This is a fact and I report it as a fact. It has nothing to do with my opinion. 

[vinci]

is there any woman in this forum, maybe all these guy would like to hear from you

[OneMoreFarang]

3 hours ago, Mac Mickmanus said:

Well, yes .

And older guy employs a unqualified  full time career and gets to have sex as well .  

  I just hope that the guys make provisions for her after they die , otherwise she will end up a 40 something trying to earn a living in bars 

Do you think that is his responsibility?

Or should she take care of her own life?

[mokwit]

10 hours ago, Adumbration said:

Do you even live in Thailand?  Show me just one Thai guy who has a mia noi the same age as him.

Yes we know those Bt5,000/room apartment blocks on the left hand side of the road out of town and the initially puzzling number of Mercedes 600SL parked there from around 5-6pm. I was told (albeit second hand) about the kind of relationship a rich old guy has with a younger mia noi. It is very unsatisfactory and standoffish from what I heard [person in discussion was VERY rich owner of a listed company relaying the terms of the deal with his mia noi).

[OneMoreFarang]

21 minutes ago, BangkokReady said:

I was watching a YouTube video recently and someone mentioned they had a female friend who went to an academic event and found the guy organising/running the event to be incredibly attractive.  She later met him again at another event, but this time he was not organising it.  The second time she viewed him as being nothing special at all.  Weird.

I also saw that video. I think it was one of Jordan Peterson's interviews. 

[OneMoreFarang]

5 minutes ago, vinci said:

is there any woman in this forum, maybe all these guy would like to hear from you

a) there are few farang women here

b) most farang guys here don't care about what farang women think.

c) the kind of Thai women which are interesting for most of the forum members are not members here

[Kinnock]

12 hours ago, Mac Mickmanus said:

Among the Thai population, 20-30 year age differences are also uncommon , Thais generally partner up with people of a similar age .

   Its mainly Western/Thai partnerships where theres a big age difference .

You're speaking of the formal Mia Luang relationship where any age difference will be small.  

 

But Thai men with means will have at least one Mia Noi who is often much, much younger.

 

Western men tend to marry the 'Mia Noi' which keeps things simpler.

[OneMoreFarang]

7 minutes ago, mokwit said:

Yes we know those Bt5,000/room apartment blocks on the left hand side of the road out of town and the initially puzzling number of Mercedes 600SL parked there from around 5-6pm. I was told (albeit second hand) about the kind of relationship a rich old guy has with a younger mia noi. It is very unsatisfactory and standoffish from what I heard [person in discussion was VERY rich owner of a listed company relaying the terms of the deal with his mia noi).

What a cheap Charlie if he buys/rents such a room for his mia noi.

[BangkokReady]

2 minutes ago, OneMoreFarang said:

I also saw that video. I think it was one of Jordan Peterson's interviews. 

It was.  I'm reluctant to mention these people by name as often some online people react negatively to them because they discuss subjects that are surprisingly controversial.  It's not uncommon for people to flip out if you start talking about evolutionary psychology and dating.

[OneMoreFarang]

1 minute ago, Kinnock said:

Western men tend to marry the 'Mia Noi' which keeps things simpler.

Most wives of Western men don't let them get away with mia nois.

I think Thai older women are a lot smarter. They keep the rich husband and if he want to do something on the side that keeps him happy and because he is happy that is also better for the wife. Win/win/win.

[BritManToo]

3 hours ago, Isaanlife said:

Understanding that, I think you could rationalize couples that spend their entire lives together have much more in common than sex. 

Normally his house and his pension, neither of which he wants to lose.

[BangkokReady]

14 minutes ago, OneMoreFarang said:

Do you think that is his responsibility?

Or should she take care of her own life?

I think it depends on the agreement and both parties should discuss it before they enter into a relationship.  If the guy says "service me and take care of me until I die and you'll never have to worry about money again, you'll get everything I have", he does have a responsibility.  If she's paid for the "work" at the time, then he doesn't have this responsibility.

Edited April 5, 2022 by BangkokReady

[OneMoreFarang]

1 minute ago, BangkokReady said:

It was.  I'm reluctant to mention these people by name as often some online people react negatively to them because they discuss subjects that are surprisingly controversial.  It's not uncommon for people to flip out if you start talking about evolutionary psychology and dating.

I understand your point.

 

On the other hand in the last couple of months I watched many hours of his videos. He is a very smart guy with a huge knowledge. I definitely learned a lot from him. And I am sure that anybody who doesn't learn from him doesn't want to learn or is ignorant.

That doesn't mean that everything he or any other person says is always the truth. When I and probably you listen that doesn't mean we have to believe everything or agree with everything. But even then he gives us something to think about. 

[BangkokReady]

6 minutes ago, Kinnock said:

You're speaking of the formal Mia Luang relationship where any age difference will be small.  

 

But Thai men with means will have at least one Mia Noi who is often much, much younger.

 

Western men tend to marry the 'Mia Noi' which keeps things simpler.

So the Thai guy marries a woman of similar age and status to have the official marriage and children with to maintain face, then has a Mia Noi who is younger, hotter, but lower class; while the foreigner doesn't worry about class or need a high status woman to marry, have kids with or maintain face, so just marries the lower class woman half his age and is generally exclusive?  Is that it?