Australian Army

[pattayadave]

2005 5:58 PM Subject: Fw: LIFE IN THE AUSTRALIAN ARMY

Text of a letter from a kid from Eromanga to Mum and Dad. (For those of

you not in the know, Eromanga is a small town west Of Quilpie in the far

south west of Queensland)

Dear Mum & Dad,

I am well. Hope youse are too. Tell me big brothers Doug and Phil that

the Army is better than workin' on the farm - tell them to get in bloody

quick smart before the jobs are all gone!

I wuz a bit slow in settling down at first, because ya don't hafta get

outta bed until 6am. But I like sleeping in now, cuz all yagotta do

before brekky is make ya bed and shine ya boots and clean ya uniform. No

bloody cows to milk, no calves to feed, no feed to stack - nothin'!! Ya

haz gotta shave though, but its not so bad, coz there's lotsa hot water

and even a light to see what ya doing!

At brekky ya get cereal, fruit and eggs but there's no kangaroo steaks

or possum stew like wot Mum makes. You don't get fed again until noon,

and by that time all the city boys are buggered because we've been on a

'route march' - geez its only just like walking to the windmill in the

back paddock!!

This one will kill me brothers Doug and Phil with laughter. I keep

getting medals for shootin' - dunno why. The bullseye is as big as a

bloody possum's bum and it don't move and its not firing back at ya like

the Johnsons did when our big scrubber bull got into their prize cows

before the Ekka last year! All ya gotta do is make yourself comfortable

and hit the target - its a piece of piss!! You don't even load your own

cartridges - they comes in little boxes and ya don't have to steady

yourself against the rollbar of the roo shooting truck when you reload!

Sometimes ya gotta wrestle with the city boys and I gotta be real

careful coz they break easy - it's not like fighting with Doug and Phil

and Jack and Boori and Steve and Muzza all at once like we do at home

after the muster.

Turns out I'm not a bad boxer either and it looks like I'm the best the

platoon's got, and I've only been beaten by this one bloke from the

Engineers - he's 6 foot 5 and 15 stone and three pick handles across the

shoulders and as ya know I'm only 5 foot 7 and eight stone wringin' wet,

but I fought him till the other blokes carried me off to the boozer.

I can't complain about the Army - tell the boys to get in quick before

word gets around how bloody good it is.

Your loving daughter,

Sheila xx