“Do you have a boyfriend?”

“When are you getting married?”

“When will you come down off the ‘kaan’?”

 

These are the most common sayings heard in daily conversation among Thais, particularly during family gatherings. This reflects how Thai culture is still attached to long-standing cultural norms, expecting women to find a husband, as getting married is supposed to be a woman’s goal in life.

 

On the other hand, is there anything wrong about staying single? Most importantly, why do we need to stigmatise single women with the metaphors, such as “keun-kaan”? 

 

-Sitting on the ramp-

 

“Keun-kaan” (ขึ้นคาน) is a Thai metaphor often heard in conversations about marriage.

 

Literally, it means “sitting on the wooden ramp”, this Thai metaphor specifically refers to unmarried women. This is quite similar to an English saying “to die an old maid”, which refers to women who are no longer young, but are still not married nor in a sexual relationship with anyone.

 

Full story: https://www.thaipbsworld.com/are-some-thai-metaphors-stigmatising-single-women/

 

-- © Copyright Thai PBS 2023-02-14

 

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I don’t think these types of questions or mentality is just common in Thai culture.  Similar attitudes, opinions, questions for example are similar in the West. 

Silly wokeism.

 

54 minutes ago, swm59nj said:

I don’t think these types of questions or mentality is just common in Thai culture.  Similar attitudes, opinions, questions for example are similar in the West. 

Speaking of western nations its been my experience the further right folks sit the more such attitudes predominate. I wonder how this contrasts and compares to LOS culture?

Edited February 14, 20233 yr by Tropposurfer

5 hours ago, swm59nj said:

I don’t think these types of questions or mentality is just common in Thai culture.  Similar attitudes, opinions, questions for example are similar in the West. 

Or even more so. 

These particular Western cultures just don't want to recognize as such. 

 

The initial OP inquiry tends to be more of an Occidental political inquiry than a social one. 

Edited February 14, 20233 yr by zzaa09

18 hours ago, ignore it said:

Silly wokeism.

 

For sure.

Who in their right mind would give a damn one way or another?

Good thing men don't know what ladies say about them in the bathroom.

Who cares about convention and tradition? Both are very over rated. Do what makes you happy. Forget about other people's expectations. Some have a very hard time with mavericks, and those willing to break the mold. It is called progress. 

Quote

Are some Thai metaphors stigmatising single women?

Probably.  But there are plenty that stigmatise single men, married men, married women, and so on.

 

Any metaphor that explains or represents something negative could be perceived as stigmatising.  So much so that there isn't really much point in worrying about it.  Otherwise you would eventually get to the point where someone could ask "is language that describes anything that anyone considers undesirable stigmatising?", to which the answer would be "probably, but there isn't much we can do about it".

 

As someone else said, simply woke garbage and not worth thinking about.  Still, it drew clicks and comments as was intended.

????

Hmmm,

 

Me and Mrs G had been happily living together for 20+ years, had our son, and honestly neither ever experienced any stigma about not being married.

My wife has several single female relatives several of then in their 30's and quite happy being single, again never heard any bad word said about them.

 

Mrs G would still single, albeit 'living in sin' if she didn't have to marry me for a Green Card lol

Guess this does not really matter considering all those fine married European or Thai ladies who end up in entertaining your willy-woka at home,  during hubby's office hours. 

The stigmatization of single women in Thai culture still exists today. Hopefully, we can move away from this in the future.