Thai Girl Checklist...

[a2396]

I think it's a good topic. I for one would subconsiously or consciously have basic criteria for choosing a serious girlfriend and obviously a wife. If a girl in question didn't have several of the attributes I look for, how can love develop?

Just a few of the highly desirable points which may combine to form a good partner:

Respectfulness to partner

Calmness

Slim but womanly

Not too dark, not too white

Polite

Not interested in using people for financial gain

Honesty

Desire for a career

Good in bed

Very limited relationship baggage

Experience in life

Travelled outside of Thailand

Traditional values (not inter)

A love of nature, history, culture and living creatures

Good sense of humour

Over 5.4" tall

Fairly well educated

Independance (not fully controlled by parents)

Very worthy traits indeed. A good list, I haven't seen them all in one person in my many decades of searching. Maybe if I could have 4 wives, I might have a chance. Split the list 4 ways.

[terry57]

Unless I missed it reading the thread, nowhere did I see 'physical attraction'. It is hard for me to believe that would not be near the top of the list for most guys. Of course many other qualities are just as or more important but IMHO if the 'physical attraction' chemistry quality is missing then the girl is a better candidate for just a friendship rather than romance.

Agree - we are initially attracted to the physical quailities - a person could grow on you if your were around them a lot like a work coleagyue or a member of the same social group etc but many studies have shown it the physical attractiveness forst for the majority of peole.

well you could have fooled me mate,

considering how many real ugly farangs are getting around with cracking looking thai girls.

if you were talking about the first world i would agree, but the rules are different here in los as the huge fat wallet seems to out way any respect for physical qualitys.

seems to be the other way around where the uglier the better gets the top job.

look mate, dont ask me why, as its an observation that one cant miss if he spends 5 minutes on any street in los.

thank you very much.

[canuckamuck]

Unless I missed it reading the thread, nowhere did I see 'physical attraction'. It is hard for me to believe that would not be near the top of the list for most guys. Of course many other qualities are just as or more important but IMHO if the 'physical attraction' chemistry quality is missing then the girl is a better candidate for just a friendship rather than romance.

Agree - we are initially attracted to the physical quailities - a person could grow on you if your were around them a lot like a work coleagyue or a member of the same social group etc but many studies have shown it the physical attractiveness forst for the majority of peole.

well you could have fooled me mate,

considering how many real ugly farangs are getting around with cracking looking thai girls.

if you were talking about the first world i would agree, but the rules are different here in los as the huge fat wallet seems to out way any respect for physical qualitys.

seems to be the other way around where the uglier the better gets the top job.

look mate, dont ask me why, as its an observation that one cant miss if he spends 5 minutes on any street in los.

thank you very much.

Well the rules for hookers are different T57. Of course hookers look for cash, their just funny that way.

BTW the OP was referring to what guys look for in Thai females.

[chanchao]

1. Social class --- Yes, important.

2. Educational background --- Relate to 1., but yes, important.

3. Language ability (both Thai and foreign) --- Yes, important

4. Family size --- Huh.. Doesn't matter in the least.

5. Family source of income and financial status ---- Nyah.. as per #2, she must have an ok education (similar or better to mine) so what the rest of the family does or owns is of lesser concern

6. Which region are they from originally (appearance) --- Well, 'appearance' is a biggie needless to say, but what region? Honestly it doesn't matter though it's beneficial / convenient if she's from the general area where you want to be living.

7. Age (range) --- Very important that it's within a pretty wide range of allowable ages and not outside of that wide range.

8. Sexual background (virgin, parent, prostitute etc.) --- Goes back to #1 and #2. Then, if she's a parent: well if I'm 25 and want to start a family then she'd better not have kids already, though if I was 65 and don't want a family then I'd almost prefer her to already have kids so she's past all that!

9. Religion --- As long as she's not way overboard on it, whatever the religion, then I'm fine with it.

10. Children (yes or no) ---- See #8.

11. Food --- What about food, food is everywhere.

12. Where to live ---- Yeah, biggie, but that's your decision eh.

Finally, these are some you missed:

13: Height

14: Weight

15: Sexual preferences

Edited July 13, 2007 by chanchao

[Acquiesce]

YAWN!!!! Another thriller on Thaivisa.com

[ozzydom]

All this sentimental codswallop is enough to make a grown man cry.

If all these relationships based on the criteria relayed in these posts are so great,why do so many of the farang mentioned go out and buy houses and motor vehicles etc in the thai wifes name and on the never never payment plan then tell their compatriots that said thai wife will never leave them because of the financial burden they would be left with.

When you find the woman with all the aforementioned qualities try telling her one day that your ATM receipt came back saying INSUFFICIENT FUNDS , that will be the true test in LOS.

[a2396]

All this sentimental codswallop is enough to make a grown man cry.

If all these relationships based on the criteria relayed in these posts are so great,why do so many of the farang mentioned go out and buy houses and motor vehicles etc in the thai wifes name and on the never never payment plan then tell their compatriots that said thai wife will never leave them because of the financial burden they would be left with.

When you find the woman with all the aforementioned qualities try telling her one day that your ATM receipt came back saying INSUFFICIENT FUNDS , that will be the true test in LOS.

Most Farangs buy such capital goods with cash, because Farang cannot get get credit in LOS and the lady usually has no money (or so she says) and is also not likely to get credit. So therefore, she has nothing to lose by dumping the old geezer and hooking up with the one she really loves, or thinks she does.

[GuestHouse]

I've never had a check list of things I wanted in the Thai women I dated - But I did have a short list of 'No Go' criteria, which I am absolutely sure I need not go into here.

[Gary A]

Clean, neat and attractive, doesn't need to be a beauty queen.

Lots of common sense and intelligent. Closely watches how she spends her money.

Doesn't wear a lot of makeup or expensive designer clothes.

No children and doesn't want any, or is at least willing NOT to have children.

Doesn't feel she has to take care of mother and father in top style or feel any obligation to move any of her family members into our home.

MUST be over thirty years old and mature.

Not a jealous clinging vine type. Insecurity leads to problems and a bad marriage.

A good cook and a good housekeeper.

Last but not least, the ability to put up with a crotchety old fart.

[chanchao]

Last but not least, the ability to put up with a crotchety old fart.

We all manage here on TV.com so I presume we all qualify.

[sbk]

Finally, these are some you missed:

15: Sexual preferences

That one is vital, I'd think, chanchao

[tijnebijn]

Finally, these are some you missed:

15: Sexual preferences

That one is vital, I'd think, chanchao

So long they do not prefer something what looks like your avatar !

[sbk]

Finally, these are some you missed:

15: Sexual preferences

That one is vital, I'd think, chanchao

So long they do not prefer something what looks like your avatar !

So, as long as she isn't into bestiality, anything goes for you, is that what you are saying tijnebijn??

[chuchok]

1. Social class --- Yes, important.

That type of reminds me of a problem that a TG is having going out with a friend of mine.TG's mum has got wind that she hooked up with a foreigner.Tg's mum to TG "If you really are going out with one of those,I will disown you" When asking TG why her mum thinks like that,TG said "She is a Social climber and stupid"

[JetsetBkk]

Requirements:

1. Orphan

2. No other relatives

3. No hard-up, sick, accident-prone friends

4. whatever

5. whatever

6. whatev.....

Only joking. Or maybe not....

[qwertz]

Common sense, I can wing the rest.

[villagefarang]

I tell ya when I left earlier to drive to Chiang Rai I had little hope for this post, as things were not looking very good. It did put me into the next membership level, so that is something. But this evening I was really impressed. Without me mucking things up you came up with much better lists and more thoughtful criteria than mine. So maybe I should just keep my mouth shut and let you guys just run with it.

[Ulysses G.]

well you could have fooled me mate,

considering how many real ugly farangs are getting around with cracking looking thai girls.

Why does Terry always pick on me?

[Kerryd]

Marriage ? I've spent close to 30 years avoiding anything that remotely comes close to a long-term relationship, let alone marriage.

I don't have any "check-list", because (from what I've heard), successful relationships require each partner to accept the small "faults" in the other. For example, you may have a poorly educated partner, but one with all the social graces of a member of royalty. She may not be able to discuss the finer points of Keats with you, but can make a mouth-watering meal out of the odds and sods leftover in the cupboards.

There has to be some "give-and-go", because everybody is an individual. You could conceivably miss out on the most wonderful partner a person could ever want, because she/he only scored 7 out of 12, or 8 out of 15, or 51 out of a 100 on a check list, and you wrote them off.

[armbarjones]

1) not formerly a man

[villagefarang]

Of course a check list, in and of itself, is of no use without some common sense (seems to me somebody pointed that out) and you need to prioritize things on a list. Not everything is of the same importance and of course it varies from person to person. When getting into a cross-cultural relationship you should at least be asking yourself some questions about things that you might take for granted back home.

I knew a guy who had only child on his list because he didn't want to be supporting a huge family. Sounds cruel but that was of importance to him and denying its importance would not have been very smart regardless of whether you agree or not.

I really don't mind people making stupid uniformed decisions in their lives. I just don't like it when the piss and moan after things go South and ask the age old question "Why Me?".

[villagefarang]

At least one person was unsure as to why I put region on the list. Well, I thought I had made polite reference to why that might be important in some circles. I will try to speak more clearly. Regional accents get treated differently by Bangkok Thais and no matter how well educated your Isaan looking girlfriend, most Thais will have an initial bad impression of both you and her because of the BG stereotype. Regardless of whether it is right or wrong you should be aware of local prejudices and what you may be subjecting your partner to in some environments. Just because you don't care what she looks like doesn't mean it will hurt her any less if people make assumptions about her and say rude things behind her back. Often little things that you might miss unless very perceptive and fluent. If you are living overseas or in her village then it doesn't matter very much.

[sukanyacondo]

1. Alive!!

[AmericanGuy1066]

1. 100% female

2. dark hair, dark eyes

3. breathes regularly

4. sense of humour

5. likes sex (or should I say making love)

6. not obsessed with money, material goods and face

7. open minded

8. speaks some English and shows an in interest in other countries and cultures

9. Knows that a map of the world has more than 2 countries (Thailand and NotThaliand)

10. smiles and laughs at lot

11. extends trust

12. doesn't end arguments or debates with "but you don't understand. This is Thailand we do things differently here..

13. was born in Korea, to Korean parents, was educated in Korea and overseas, but still lives in Korea, and is prepared to travel....to Thailand... sometimes...maybe

Edited July 13, 2007 by AmericanGuy1066

[Tippaporn]

Marriage ? I've spent close to 30 years avoiding anything that remotely comes close to a long-term relationship, let alone marriage.

I don't have any "check-list", because (from what I've heard), successful relationships require each partner to accept the small "faults" in the other. For example, you may have a poorly educated partner, but one with all the social graces of a member of royalty. She may not be able to discuss the finer points of Keats with you, but can make a mouth-watering meal out of the odds and sods leftover in the cupboards.

There has to be some "give-and-go", because everybody is an individual. You could conceivably miss out on the most wonderful partner a person could ever want, because she/he only scored 7 out of 12, or 8 out of 15, or 51 out of a 100 on a check list, and you wrote them off.

Fess up, Kerry, you're just proud to be TV's Most Eligible Bachelor. [cough, cough] And one of Pattaya's greatest employers. The local economy would dive if you became a chained man. You're too much of a humanitarian to allow that to happen.

I do humbly agree with you, though. There's one thing that I've learned to be true and it's this: there isn't a partner out there who could ever satisfy one's every desire or need. Therefore, there has to be give and take. Appreciation for what's there is key. Woe to those who find too many dissatisfactions with their partner and then attempt to mold them to their vision of what they should be.

[Jersey_UK]

VillageFarang,

I reckon putting requirements into a list does look more brutal than the reality...........

In my case I did not make a list in advance because I never intended to marry a Thai woman, certainly 100% NOT anyone from my "social circle" and certainly not my Missus when I first met her and nor for many years and visits to Thailand.

But when (to my great surprise!) I knew things had a good chance of developing for me emotionally, I did have a good long hard think about the pros and cons of what she brought to the table / her personal circumstances BEFORE things went beyond a point of no return.

Somewhat mercenary for sure, but I can be like that .....but even I did not make an actual list or post my requirements on the internet

[CarlBkk]

VillageFarang,

I reckon putting requirements into a list does look more brutal than the reality...........

In my case I did not make a list in advance because I never intended to marry a Thai woman, certainly 100% NOT anyone from my "social circle" and certainly not my Missus when I first met her and nor for many years and visits to Thailand.

But when (to my great surprise!) I knew things had a good chance of developing for me emotionally, I did have a good long hard think about the pros and cons of what she brought to the table / her personal circumstances BEFORE things went beyond a point of no return.

Somewhat mercenary for sure, but I can be like that .....but even I did not make an actual list or post my requirements on the internet

Fair play to you. If more farang took a step back and looked at the relationship like this in the early stages, and became a little more choosey, we wouldn't have such a <deleted> reputation for scraping the bottom of the barrel.

[Johpa]

1) not formerly a man

Nor currently in possession of an attached penis given the attractiveness of some Ladyboys and given how many TG are indeed TG.

[geriatrickid]

I think the list needs differentiation between the typical foreign spouse arrangement in Thailand and the special occurrences.

How many of you can actually cite a case where a higher end Thai such as a physician, science professional (PhD, MClSc. etc.), judge or wealthy & educated woman (by western standards) married a foreigner she met in Thailand, particularly one that was drawn from the general pool of foreigners? They marry from their own kind and by own kind I mean someone from a similar social and educational position in life, just like in the west.

My own experience is that Thais, like girls back home, are not going to chance throwing away all that they have worked for by marrying a book keeper from a multinational or a small time importer or a retired truck driver from Oslo. Unless the guy is great in every other way or super wealthy, he doesn't have a chance. The family would intervene. Just imagine if your daughter with the M.Eng brought home Willy the flute player from Luton. Even though he had most of his teeth was charming and polite, would you say, yes dear that's a real catch you have there. If you were back home, would you marry the old cleaning lady?

Unfortunately for alot of guys that means they have to fish in the 2nd and 3rd tier pools that will be more accepting of them. So for many of you, you need a checklist. For those of you that are tier 1, you are lucky and can rely on different criteria.

Once you get to the tier 3 level you're going to be drawing from the girls that have had as many intimate partners as a soi dog has fleas. Considering the current prevalence of infectious diseases, it would be prudent to insist an a thorough medical with the usual blood tests and including testing for HIV, Hepatitis A,B,C,& E, syphilis, chlamydia, gonorrhea, tuberculosis, HPV (with a PAP smear) and Trichomoniasis. A smart Thai girl would insist on a similar exam from her prospective male.

Yea I know, you think I'm mad for writing this, but if you read the population and geographic trends in reported and tracked diseases, you'd understand why I recommend the screenings. (FYI the sextrade workers are not tested for many of the diseases referenced so don't think you're safer with one of them.)

And if you want to really have a snit, I'd advise any Thai interested in a foreign male over the age of 50 to insist that the male underwent a colorectal exam and heart disease test. Expat unmarried males in Thailand are deemed a high risk group overall because of their age, and sedentary lifestyle featuring smoking and excessive drinking. The last thing a Thai woman wants is to be changing some guy's colostomy bag after he has had a stroke.

[villagefarang]

I think the list needs differentiation between the typical foreign spouse arrangement in Thailand and the special occurrences.

How many of you can actually cite a case where a higher end Thai such as a physician, science professional (PhD, MClSc. etc.), judge or wealthy & educated woman (by western standards) married a foreigner she met in Thailand, particularly one that was drawn from the general pool of foreigners? They marry from their own kind and by own kind I mean someone from a similar social and educational position in life, just like in the west.

My own experience is that Thais, like girls back home, are not going to chance throwing away all that they have worked for by marrying a book keeper from a multinational or a small time importer or a retired truck driver from Oslo. Unless the guy is great in every other way or super wealthy, he doesn't have a chance. The family would intervene. Just imagine if your daughter with the M.Eng brought home Willy the flute player from Luton. Even though he had most of his teeth was charming and polite, would you say, yes dear that's a real catch you have there. If you were back home, would you marry the old cleaning lady?

Unfortunately for alot of guys that means they have to fish in the 2nd and 3rd tier pools that will be more accepting of them. So for many of you, you need a checklist. For those of you that are tier 1, you are lucky and can rely on different criteria.

Once you get to the tier 3 level you're going to be drawing from the girls that have had as many intimate partners as a soi dog has fleas. Considering the current prevalence of infectious diseases, it would be prudent to insist an a thorough medical with the usual blood tests and including testing for HIV, Hepatitis A,B,C,& E, syphilis, chlamydia, gonorrhea, tuberculosis, HPV (with a PAP smear) and Trichomoniasis. A smart Thai girl would insist on a similar exam from her prospective male.

Yea I know, you think I'm mad for writing this, but if you read the population and geographic trends in reported and tracked diseases, you'd understand why I recommend the screenings. (FYI the sextrade workers are not tested for many of the diseases referenced so don't think you're safer with one of them.)

And if you want to really have a snit, I'd advise any Thai interested in a foreign male over the age of 50 to insist that the male underwent a colorectal exam and heart disease test. Expat unmarried males in Thailand are deemed a high risk group overall because of their age, and sedentary lifestyle featuring smoking and excessive drinking. The last thing a Thai woman wants is to be changing some guy's colostomy bag after he has had a stroke.

Your not going to win many friends with that post but I loved every word. Obviously a very thoughtful and knowledgeable gentleman.