Thingamabob Posted Sunday at 02:10 AM Posted Sunday at 02:10 AM Most relationships in Asia are based on practicality, less so on the romantic Western concept of love. 1 1
flexomike Posted Sunday at 03:17 AM Posted Sunday at 03:17 AM On 3/27/2025 at 1:46 PM, ChicagoExpat said: Amigo -- the problem with living overseas on American poverty-level income is that, while it's more than the locals make, it will leave you very little cushion for the problems of life -- illness, her desire that you support her whole family and build a house for them all (which she gets if you split), the occasional desire to travel, if you have kids, etc. This doesn't sound like much of a plan. It's nice to think of a "lady of virtue" loving you for your simple downstate smile, but I'm just not sure it's realistic and most likely you will end up poor and alone here, with the U.S. Embassy buying you a ticket home. I don't mean to dump all over your hopes, but I've been here long enough to see this happen over and over and over again. The Embassy will not be buying him a ticket
1FinickyOne Posted Sunday at 03:23 AM Posted Sunday at 03:23 AM 4 minutes ago, flexomike said: The Embassy will not be buying him a ticket Very correct - and being broke anywhere is not where you want to be... 1
black tabby12345 Posted Sunday at 03:50 AM Posted Sunday at 03:50 AM Regarding size of the wallet and marriage things you mentioned, let me share something I have witnessed more than a decade ago(while I was still repeatedly applying for tourist visa in Vientiane, Lao capital). In Nongkai, I met a man who self-claimed "poverty stricken" painter living in the Isaan region. He also added he can only eat twice a day as he is constantly short of money. He was also travelling to Lao for Thai visa(at the expense of his supporter, kind and generous enough to cover all the costs involved). Still, he said he has been in a de facto husband and wife relationship with a Thai woman(whose family is living on farming in rural Thailand). That poor artist was an Asian man in his 50s. And he looked less than 5 feet.
1FinickyOne Posted Sunday at 03:53 AM Posted Sunday at 03:53 AM Anything is possible, but as noted above, love and romance here is not often the same as the Western World - the word practicality has been used and this is mostly correct. The other aspect that I did not see mentioned is that Westerners tend to hang on to the romantic notion of "love" that we all had as teenagers... there are not only cultural differences but age differences that come into play and I mean age differences in that the boyhood concept of love is not as prevalent in older people - that is for most, a time of life element that has passed. I don't know how much finances is a requirement for everyone, but most Thai ladies are not really interested in an equal partner that they might end up supporting in times of illness. If you do prove yourself as a good supporter willing to take care of them and their family, they may come to love you and respect you, but again not in a teenage, moon, June, spoon way. But, with minimum income, what will you do for health care? I have seen guys here who survive on little, living in Thai style apartments for $100 a month and eating cheap street food, but this lifestyle is not attractive for most Thai ladies. In many ways for poor Thai, it is still a matriarchal society and they look at having a husband as someone they need to take care of, and this should be compensated. One lady who wanted me to introduce her to a farang, after a moments thought, told me she didn't want a husband who needed too much care... [she did not ask for someone young or handsome or any of the things that most Westerners consider important. No mention of romance. But, what do you want? Vietnam era would put you in your 70s or late 60s at best. Do you want a 70 year old lady? I know some fairly attractive late 50 year olds and even a few 60+ but they are not seeking the hard work of a farming life - what do you have to offer them? They do value kindness and goodness, but generosity too...
1FinickyOne Posted Sunday at 04:39 AM Posted Sunday at 04:39 AM On 3/27/2025 at 12:25 PM, worgeordie said: If your poor , look for a rich woman here , that's what you need to do, if your hansom and well hung ,it might just work out for you, good luck regards worgeordie Rich women here would not be his target audience.... they would look down their noses at any poor guy... he would be as useless as hauling coal to Newcastle...
Bruce Aussie Posted Sunday at 07:42 AM Posted Sunday at 07:42 AM On 3/27/2025 at 1:22 PM, simon43 said: As a man of modest means, and with 20+ years of living in Thailand/Laos/Burma behind me, I have been the most financially-stable, stress-free and healthy when I live alone and don't bother seeking romance, love or dirty women! (3 marriages/divorces later). Ask yourself - why would any women in any country be interested in some old guy who has no money?! For love?? Don't make me laugh... If you're 50 years+, there is only 1 reason why a women would be interested in you and that's for money or for inheritance when she/her family 'dispose' of you 🙂 Come to Thailand, enjoy a bachelor life and your hobbies (I enjoy counting trains passing by my abode, still looking out for the first one...) Was that trains or trans 🤣
Popular Post Tug Posted Sunday at 02:11 PM Popular Post Posted Sunday at 02:11 PM If you are broke why on earth would you even think about taking on the responsibility for another human being and possibly children as well?that’s just stupid!get yourself together first!if you are thinking with the (little head) do everyone a favor and get a ( rental) from time to time! 1 2
wavodavo Posted Sunday at 11:44 PM Posted Sunday at 11:44 PM On 3/27/2025 at 3:11 PM, camper star said: My question is the above but continues as... in her country. My thoughts on this are that a woman of virtue will most likely fall in love with such a man from a foreign country. Have you found this true in your relationship with your Thai wife? HELLOOOOO!!!!! Bobby Boy.You picked a good handle this time...CAMP STAR. 1
Wrwest Posted Monday at 04:29 AM Posted Monday at 04:29 AM On 3/27/2025 at 12:11 PM, camper star said: My question is the above but continues as... in her country. My thoughts on this are that a woman of virtue will most likely fall in love with such a man from a foreign country. Have you found this true in your relationship with your Thai wife? Sustainable monthly income $2400 a month usd ($1605 of that from SS). So, as an American approaching retirement in 2011, with cholesterol issues (5 by-passes in US 2005) I determined I could not enjoy a working middle class retirement in the USA. Started doing background reading, and after four monthlong trips in 2009 & 2010, decided on Thailand. Lower cost countries are also indicative of lower per capita income and without the western financial security nets, especially for females ... seemed like a good fit. Happy here after 14 years (in July). Comfortable working middle class lifestyle, 3 bed, 2 bath, new "bungalow, 2 cars, motorbike and able to do some travel ... oh, with a cute Thai Wife 26 years my junior. The 3 of us are able to enjoy life on my 65K+ retirement income per month. I would add that while economics are critical, whether one can be happy living in another culture is also critical. 1
ChicagoExpat Posted yesterday at 02:32 AM Posted yesterday at 02:32 AM On 3/30/2025 at 10:17 AM, flexomike said: The Embassy will not be buying him a ticket The Embassy buys tickets for people all the time. Sorry but you're incorrect.
ChicagoExpat Posted yesterday at 02:33 AM Posted yesterday at 02:33 AM On 3/30/2025 at 10:23 AM, 1FinickyOne said: Very correct - and being broke anywhere is not where you want to be... That's not true, concerning the ticket. The second part is.
1FinickyOne Posted yesterday at 06:13 AM Posted yesterday at 06:13 AM 3 hours ago, ChicagoExpat said: That's not true, concerning the ticket. I knew a guy who could not get out of Immigration detention because he had no money - the US Embassy refused him the $$ and only would call his relatives in the USA who eventually bailed him out - he was surely destitute... maybe if you have assets to pledge, they will lend you the money...
jas007 Posted yesterday at 09:26 AM Posted yesterday at 09:26 AM 3 hours ago, 1FinickyOne said: I knew a guy who could not get out of Immigration detention because he had no money - the US Embassy refused him the $$ and only would call his relatives in the USA who eventually bailed him out - he was surely destitute... maybe if you have assets to pledge, they will lend you the money... It probably depends on the whim of the State Dept. person working that day.
flexomike Posted yesterday at 11:16 AM Posted yesterday at 11:16 AM 8 hours ago, ChicagoExpat said: The Embassy buys tickets for people all the time. Sorry but you're incorrect. While U.S. embassies can assist distressed U.S. citizens abroad, they typically do not directly purchase airline tickets or provide free transportation; instead, they may offer loans to cover travel expenses, short-term food, lodging, and fees.
ChicagoExpat Posted 8 hours ago Posted 8 hours ago On 4/1/2025 at 1:13 PM, 1FinickyOne said: I knew a guy who could not get out of Immigration detention because he had no money - the US Embassy refused him the $$ and only would call his relatives in the USA who eventually bailed him out - he was surely destitute... maybe if you have assets to pledge, they will lend you the money... That's the first option. If relatives are willing -- which they were in his case -- that's what they go with. It is a loan, but the only downside to not paying at least some of it back is you can't get a new passport. They don't report it to IRS, or anything. Great deal for the deadbeat, bad deal for the taxpayer.
ChicagoExpat Posted 8 hours ago Posted 8 hours ago 22 hours ago, jas007 said: It probably depends on the whim of the State Dept. person working that day. No, it doesn't. It's actually really common here -- I have a friend in the Consular Section and they do several each week.
ChicagoExpat Posted 8 hours ago Posted 8 hours ago 20 hours ago, flexomike said: While U.S. embassies can assist distressed U.S. citizens abroad, they typically do not directly purchase airline tickets or provide free transportation; instead, they may offer loans to cover travel expenses, short-term food, lodging, and fees. Yes, they buy the ticket, but it is a loan.
jas007 Posted 7 hours ago Posted 7 hours ago 15 minutes ago, ChicagoExpat said: No, it doesn't. It's actually really common here -- I have a friend in the Consular Section and they do several each week. I'm sure they do, but at the end of the day, there's a human being that makes the decision, right? Is there some sort of rule whereby any expat can walk into the State Department office and get a ticket back to America? 1
JackGats Posted 1 hour ago Posted 1 hour ago Quote from the post above: "a true woman out there in Thailand who meets your dream". There's no such woman, neiter in Thailand nor elsewhere. There are just women whose expectation you meet with respect to age, looks, wealth etc. You have a certain SMV (sexual market value) and the market is increasingly globalized.
madone Posted 24 minutes ago Posted 24 minutes ago On 3/27/2025 at 12:17 PM, Yagoda said: $15,000 USD a year is probably better than 75% of the folks in ASEAN But it wont support a foreigner living in Asean, let alone with a patrner
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