Why Won't The Wife Organise Dinner?

[Bpraim1]

I sure hope she doesn't read this Soundman, You think dinner is your only problem now, hahahahaha

[onethailand]

But it doesn't solve the underlying problem of a wife who not only doesn't give two hoots about her husband being hungry, but also doesn't seem to care if her own kids are not fed properly.

Somehow I don't think this is the case, though I know some Thai women exactly like this. I think it's more a matter of convenience - or a bad day at work, or both. The chips and coke comment was a bit of a surprise though.

You can't just paper over the cracks and say "Buy take aways". Mrs Soundman does not sound like a loving and caring wife to me

Soundman, does she do this all the time, or was this a once-off?

[roietjimmy]

Dare we ask, wheres the wife ?

Nah - she is at home half way through a 73 disc Korean movie series!

My god, soundman! How could you have failed to mention this in your OP. This heinous addiction is the root cause for the wife's bizarre behavior. The addiction called KSOA (Korean Soap Opera Addiction) has become pandemic with addicts estimated in the millions worldwide. Even Tiger Woods has signed on to star in a Korean soap opera because his mother is a fan. A UN study costing $283,000,000 and conducted by 1250 prominent experts from over 100 countries has concluded "Unlike other forms of entertainment, KSOAs are unable to separate reality from what they see on the programs". Having failed to form a consensus on what to do about the problem they have formed another committee to further study the problem.

So far the only thing family and friends can do is watch the programs with the KSOA so they will be aware of potential problems. The husband of one KSOA watched episodes of "Jewel in the Palace" which include an evil court lady's plot to hide a bad luck charm in the kitchen; a competition on how to cook whale meat; and a doctor using his acupuncture kit to save a woman who ate poisoned berries. His wife, who refused to cook before, now happily prepares whale meat for every meal. Performing a regular search of the kitchen, he is able to remove bad luck charms planted daily by his wife. He now avoids eating any type of berry.

Dream spouse videos can be produced for a small fee.

[stumonster]

Korean soap operas - the people in the funny hats

[soundman]

Well, what a can of worms.

While admitting that wifey is next to useless in the kitchen (dear god I hope she doesn't read this thread), she normally is concerned with basic family maintenance. Even if she can't be bothered cooking, she will normally send for some food for at least the kids. The current loss of care is an unusual occurrence - however not an isolated incident.

After reading many replies I am inclined to think that her current "I don't care" attitude is attributable to a number of different factors. I don't know much about post natal depression but she did have another baby about ten weeks ago. On top of that we have been in the process of moving into a new house (out of the parents house) over the last two weeks. This has created a fair level of stress, because the family weren't so approving of us moving into our own house. The new house was an empty shell when we moved in & wifey has been putting considerable effort & spending way over budget on fitting it out.

So if we consider PND, family hassles, & budgeting headaches - added all together - I believe they may be a very good reason as to why she has developed an "I don't care attitude". She has actually been much better today. Good sign!

Advice from "food per view" to "have another beer at the pub" to "weekly beatings" to "make sure you do your own bit" to "stand up for yourself man" to "depression" to "mental illness" to "trade her in" to "spoilt princess" & many other outstanding pieces of commentary. Bringing up something personal on thai visa can be akin to opening Pandora's Box. Good value!

I think maybe she just needed a break without hassles for a few days & maybe I am in the same boat - proved by venting on an internet forum.

Thanx guys & girls!

PS & if people would like to debate the pros and cons of Thais being addicted to Korean Soap Opera movies pls. feel free to continue.

Edited October 7, 2007 by soundman

[rixalex]

Well, what a can of worms.

While admitting that wifey is next to useless in the kitchen (dear god I hope she doesn't read this thread), she normally is concerned with basic family maintenance. Even if she can't be bothered cooking, she will normally send for some food for at least the kids. The current loss of care is an unusual occurrence - however not an isolated incident.

After reading many replies I am inclined to think that her current "I don't care" attitude is attributable to a number of different factors. I don't know much about post natal depression but she did have another baby about ten weeks ago. On top of that we have been in the process of moving into a new house (out of the parents house) over the last two weeks. This has created a fair level of stress, because the family weren't so approving of us moving into our own house. The new house was an empty shell when we moved in & wifey has been putting considerable effort & spending way over budget on fitting it out.

So if we consider PND, family hassles, & budgeting headaches - added all together - I believe they may be a very good reason as to why she has developed an "I don't care attitude". She has actually been much better today. Good sign!

Advice from "food per view" to "have another beer at the pub" to "weekly beatings" to "make sure you do your own bit" to "stand up for yourself man" to "depression" to "mental illness" to "trade her in" to "spoilt princess" & many other outstanding pieces of commentary. Bringing up something personal on thai visa can be akin to opening Pandora's Box. Good value!

I think maybe she just needed a break without hassles for a few days & maybe I am in the same boat - proved by venting on an internet forum.

Thanx guys & girls!

PS & if people would like to debate the pros and cons of Thais being addicted to Korean Soap Opera movies pls. feel free to continue.

Throughout this thread your responses have spoken volumes about the type of guy your are. Just too God d*mn nice! Some of the things should have provoked some kind of reaction, but instead you've just thanked people for their input.

Not sure if this is a Thai thing or just females in general, but in my experience the guys with the biggest hearts just end up being taken advantage of the most. There is such a thing as being too nice.

[eek]

Hey soundman

I did think you said your wifey had a new baby a while ago, thats y i wondered if maybe she has a bit of post natal depression. From all you say, its a stressful time right now, for you both. Im sure you will find the best way around it. Maybe as you say, just a bit of time is needed. Sounds like you have a good relationship but has some external things going on thats causing stress. Maybe worth while reading up a little on signs of post natal depression, just to be informed and either rule it out, or if you think it might be the case, find ways of helping her through it.

Keep smiling and laughing and get/give lots of big cuddles to each other.

[soundman]

Throughout this thread your responses have spoken volumes about the type of guy your are. Just too God d*mn nice! Some of the things should have provoked some kind of reaction, but instead you've just thanked people for their input.

Not sure if this is a Thai thing or just females in general, but in my experience the guys with the biggest hearts just end up being taken advantage of the most. There is such a thing as being too nice.

Thanx for your post.

Just not much point getting worked up over anonamous comments on an internet forum.

A guy suggests I beat my wife on a weekly basis (TIC or not), do you really think I am going to follow advice that doesn't sit well with my principles? After that desision is made what can be gained by following it up with a slanging match or pissing contest?

One thing that has stood very well for me in my life is being able to control my own temperament as I deem necessary. An absolute must in business (or poker ) if you want to achieve.

So if people have been kind enough to reply to a topic that I have posted, why would I want to start berrating them for their point of view? If I do that too often, nobody will want to come to read my threads & admin @ thaivisa will probably get pissed off. Not very productive when I am in need of an answer or point of view to a certain situation. Not that this thread was the best example!

Anyway, I think that about answers your question.

Cheers,

Soundman.

[Shah Jahan]

If your wife wont cook for you - that is what girlfriends are for

if you get the smell on you - she will suddenly become much more interested in 'your needs'

[cmsally]

OK, that explains it ,now we know about the new arriVAL - CONGRATULATIONS !

Which confirms my suspicion that there is something hormonal involved with those Korean soaps.

And by the way, in case you didn't know, 6 months compulsory rest is needed after childbirth.

So just run off and get her another pillow.

[rainman]

You have the same situation I've had with my wife a few months ago. In my case, I blew up when she walked up behind me with a cup of instant soup after I asked her to make something for dinner after a quite stressful day. I admit, she did ask me before what I would like and I told her whatever she would like to cook for me. But anyways, from that day on, breakfast, lunch and dinner is ready without me having to say anything. I also like to cook myself so it's not like she needs to do 100% of the cooking, but more like 70%. But when I want to eat something, I want to eat something real. I can fix the instant soups for myself if I want one.

Anyways, maybe it's time for you to have a serious talk with her and let her know that you work all day and that you would like her to take care of the food and whatever other things.

[eek]

john..maybe you didnt notice, but mrs soundman is working full time too ..and had a new baby a few months ago. Soundy is just looking for some equality in the relationship as he gets the kids up and ready in the morning. The problem is that he says its happening a lot atm..so was looking for other peoples perspective on it.

To be honest, if someone blew up at me for not making them a full meal every night of the week i would be shocked. Granted a cup of instant soup is a bit much to take though.

Some of the replies have had me wondering where the communication lies in peoples relationships..but only for a moment as i have other things to worry about than other peoples lives Times like this makes me realise just how sabai sabai my life is..the idea about getting worked up over food is over my head..but then again i dont have kiddies. That would change a LOT of things for me.