She Says She Is Pregnant!

[cdnvic]

Fortunately Thailand isn't one of those liberal-infested places where your slut wife can push out another guy's kid and you get stuck for child support.

And just why would your wife get involved with another with such a fine example of psudo-manhood as you at home?

I guess you just couldn't deliver what she needed eh?

Hey, kids, look! An intellectual!

Well, that blows the "Takes one to know one" theory right out of the water.

[Acquiesce]

It's not hard to realise that TheForemostAuthority and onionman (the OP) are the same person.

PS. I'm still trying to work out how he thinks he can get a katoey up the stick.

Edited November 5, 2007 by Acquiesce

[cdnvic]

It's not hard to realise that TheForemostAuthority and onionman (the OP) are the same person.

PS. I'm still trying to work out how he thinks he can get a katoey up the stick.

[sunisa]

I guess I need to say... she is not my girlfriend. I been dating her for almost a year. She lives in Hua Hin, I live in Bangkok. I she used to stay with me on weekends. Cooking, cleaning. Really sweet.

She is not your gf. but you are whit her for a year? What is her position?

When she is cooking ,cleaning for you she is so sweet when she got pregnant she is crazy

Don't you dare to accept?

abortion in thailand can be legally or illgeally depand on your reasonable

[onionman]

bye the way sir.

if you dont pay her and you consider her a regular how does she pay her bills?

She has a job. Some Thai girls do, you know.

I think you heroes out there should back off onionman ! He has every right to be pis*ed off. The fact that he was banging her for free and never gave her anything more than street food is totally irrelevant.

Me personally, I think the slut should hang for what shes done !.....

Amen.

The story is either real or it's false. Either way, it's nice to see the OP - who is obviously far from being a gentalman [sic] - squirming like a stuck pig.

One finds one's level in life.

Who is OP? Shouldn't it be OM? Or am I a transformer now. Optimus Prime (a good guy .

I started off being sympathetic to the OP's situation and was going to offer some advice but the more he posts the more I find myself drawn to the conclusion that he is a prick and if the story is real, then he has only himself to blame and perhaps it would be a good thing for some of her family to come and remind him of his responsibilities.

So how many other "non girlfriends" that he screws during the week does he have unprotected sex with ? Lots by his account.

You play with fire and you get burned. Tough sh1t.

Tough sh!t for the kid .

Couldn't agree with you more WaiWai. The OP is taking all the flack, but cleary the responsibilty now and in the future is also with his GF, it takes two to resolve this and he is hardly going to find the answears on a forum like this.The more he replies, the less sympathy he is going to get.

Personally, I would suggest that he actually needs to sit down with her face to face and sort this out rather than respond to the bitching on this thread.

Yup. I agree. I've managed to get her on the phone for a rational conversation just now.

So how many other "non girlfriends" that he screws during the week does he have unprotected sex with ? Lots by his account.

I date lots of girls. I use a condom with them all. Always, always, always. I thought I had someone I could trust. Obviously I was wrong.

Anyway, what's wrong with dating multipul girls if in each case, both parties are honest and ok with it?

Tell her that it cannot be your baby because you had a vasectomy,

a little trick I learned a few years ago

Great idea. But wouldn't work in this situation because I if I had a vasectomy, we wouldn't have gotten the pill in the first place.

Has anyone else noticed how quickly Onionman has mastered the art of the "multi-quote" function (after only a couple of posts). Don't know about you but it took me a long time to learn that.

I'm pretty clever, aren't I?

On another note. If you are dating all these girls, "rubber up" for chrissake man. Next time you might not be so lucky to only get a girl pregnant

[onionman]

Yeah, good advice. Like I just said above here, I always use protection with every girl. Except for this girl after about 10 months we decided to get tested and get the pill.

Your financial obligations are next to nil. Two or three thousand baht a month, that's for the kid, none for the girl. And that's only if the kid is yours so do the DNA test. Fortunately Thailand isn't one of those liberal-infested places where your slut wife can push out another guy's kid and you get stuck for child support.

Your moral obligations are entirely up to you. Even if it is your kid and you don't want to deal, then don't deal. Just make sure you can live with yourself first. One more bastard kid in Thailand makes no particular difference in the greater scheme of things.

Finally, someone addresses the main question. Thank you.

when you said things along the lines of"... starts asking for money in a year, am I legally obligated? If my income is coming from a Thai company, does she get a cut?" in your opening post, it did give the impression that you didnt want to be obligated financially. As does this: " Anyway, I'd also like to point out that my original question was about my LEGAL OBLIGATIONS. I want to know if she's gonna have my by my balls for 18 years." Yes some of us made assumptions, but not pulled out of thin air.

My main concern is figuring out her motives. If she knows that I would be legally obligated to pay, then we know exactly why she is doing this. It totally sounded like I was not gonna pay. I never said that, but I can see how I was misleading.

Its done now anyway, so try to calm down and think rationally.

Good idea, man. It's kinda hard to do that, but I will try.

You say she was emotional and unstable..but in what way? Surely odd behavior would set off alarm bells and give you indications that you could not fully trust her? Or? You say she is totally crazy and selfish AFTER.. You mean AFTER you shouted at her and demanded she have an abortion? Well of course shes gonna be feeling a bit crazy at the moment, shes pregnant and your not responding as she probably hoped..?

First, I thought she was a bit emotional and unstable. A lot of women I know are. But I trusted her.

After I found out her trick, I started believing she was crazy and selfish. That's when the shouting started. Wouldn't you shout? Come on guys, tell me who here wouldn't shout.

Yes, I totally should have not trusted this girl. Dispite the names I been calling her, I don't think she is a bad person for doing this. I think she made an irrational decision from the clouds of her emotional unstablity, but not because she is a bad person. Still, what she did is deffinately not cool.

But, how exactley is she totally crazy and selfish? What is she doing?

Because she decided to make me a father without my approval. SHE decided. Not WE decided. SHE. You can't just do that. That is a two person decision. She decived me. That is why I called her selfish.

But what exactly do you want people to say/give advice on?

Legal obligations.

You say you want to know if she can "have you by the balls for 18 years" but then say "Most of you seem to be cutting into me. It seems a lot of you assume I said I wouldn't support the kid" giving the impression that you WILL support the kid. So why do you want to know your legal stance? Either you will give the correct child-maintenance payments or not, regardless of being, or not being, a part of the childs life.

I want to know my legal obligations so I can guess at her motives. If I am legaly obligated to give her, say... %25 of my income, then we know exactly what her plan is.

If I am not legaly obligated at all, then I can choose to give her as much money as I see fit, if she even needs it at all.

If I AM legaly obligated, I can pretend I'm leaving the country forever, bluff that I wouldnt support the kid, and then she would realize her plan to suck me into this legal obligation failed and possibly get an abortion, if that is her only reason for getting pregnant.

Or do you just want to vent your outrage? In which case you should realise that nothing in life is always within your control, and make plans about what you intend to do if she doesnt want an abortion and if the child is yours.

I guess I wanted to vent a little. But that only makes u feel better if people sympathize. Apperently I'm not getting much of that.

[onionman]

She believed that one day you'd realize that you wanted to be with her. Maybe she thought a baby would make you see that. A woman that just wants sex does not clean up a man's house and cook for him.

Yup. She was attatched emotionally. So was I. Just because I date multiple girls, doesn't mean I don't have feelings. I really cared about her and enjoyed the time we spent together. I just wasn't ready for a serious relationship. (I know someone is gonna say this, so I'll save you time: Onionman should not have unprotected sex if he isn't ready for a serious relationship.)

Abortion without medical cause is illegal in Thailand (and yes, illegal in this case is about as illegal as prostitution.) But, it's not as easy to find one for the average Thai as a "karaoke" bar is. cite If you ask where to get one on this forum, the topic will be closed (or at least that's what's happened in the past.)

I think I already know where one is.

It's not hard to realise that TheForemostAuthority and onionman (the OP) are the same person.

PS. I'm still trying to work out how he thinks he can get a katoey up the stick.

I'm here for advice, not to talk to myself.

PS. I'm still trying to work out how he thinks he can get a katoey up the stick.

Haha, I wish I knew what you were talking about!

When she is cooking ,cleaning for you she is so sweet when she got pregnant she is crazy

As I've said countless times, I didn't say she is crazy because she is pregnant. I said she is crazy because she stopped taking the pill to intentionaly get pregnant without my concent.

[onionman]

I managed to get her on the phone a few hours ago. Tried to calmly talk some reason into her. Contain my feelings from exploding into the mouth piece.

She was saying that she would take some medicine to "cancel baby". She also said it's been about 1 month. As far as I know, the best "cancel baby" medicine is only about 50% effective within 2 weeks. But after that, nothing.

She said her friend recommended this medicine. White whiskey mixed with something. Sounds like a useless home remedy to me.

Seems like another devious plan. Pretend the medicine worked. Let Onionman believe he will not have a baby. Then, after 9 months, stick hands out for money.

I want her here. I want to see this first hand, or I'm not gonna believe a word she says.

So I told her I need someone right now, she needs someone right now, so let's do it together. Come to Bangkok, we'll do all the hospital stuff together. She didn't want to come, saying she never wants to see me again (until 9 months later maybe…?).

She kept hanging up on me until I dropped the strategic bomb. I told her I am going back to live in my home country next month. I told her I am sick of Thailand and I can't trust anybody here. I told her I thought I could trust her, but now I see I can't. That really got her. She then asked me what she can do to keep me in Thailand. I told her just come to bkk, let us do the hospital stuff together. She said ok.

She wanted to know if I was angry. I lied. I said I'm not gonna be angry if you just come help me, I help her and we do this together. I mean, I lied by saying I wasn't gonna be angry. As soon as I see a negative test result in my hands, I'm outta this crazy relationship. I can never, never trust her. I can forgive her for the mistake. But I don't need people like that close to me in my life.

So, it seems that maybe things will be sorted soon. We will see. I will post again for those of you who might care to read.

[eefoo]

It's not hard to realise that TheForemostAuthority and onionman (the OP) are the same person.

That can't be - I'm sure it's against forum rules .........

[JUDAS]

Onionman, you made posts here at 2.49am,2.50am and said nothing about your phone call to her etc. You the post at 3.07am saying "I managed to get her on the phone a few hours ago." I was about to offer advice on this subject but now I'm finding it somewhat difficult to believe the whole story...

[ZukiSuzuki]

What a thriller!

May i ask you what you intend to do if she is indeed pregnant and she does indeed give birth to a child which turns out to be yours?

[onionman]

Onionman, you made posts here at 2.49am,2.50am and said nothing about your phone call to her etc. You the post at 3.07am saying "I managed to get her on the phone a few hours ago." I was about to offer advice on this subject but now I'm finding it somewhat difficult to believe the whole story...

Haha. I find it so strange that people keep accusing me of making up this whole thing. You live in Thailand right? You should know that this stuff happens all the time. Is it really that hard to believe?

Anyway, First, I typed my replies. I could not post all at once because it was too big and the quote formating was lost. So I cut it up in to 2 or 3 posts. Then I told the story about the phone call. Why does it matter what order I do it in?

May i ask you what you intend to do if she is indeed pregnant and she does indeed give birth to a child which turns out to be yours?

If she has my kid, I will see a lawyer. If I have to give a unresonable payment to her, then I will leave the country and pay what I feel is right. If this goes to court or something, I don't trust Thai autority to give an honest judgement when a farang is involved.

If there is no legal obligation, I can decide exactly how much I'm gonna give.

My other option would be to see if I could keep the kid. I know a farang who did that. He was the father, I was "friends" with the Thai mother. She wanted to keep the kid, who was about 4 or 5 at the time and somehow she wasn't allowed to keep the kid and he now has the kid. At first I thought it was horrible. But now I think differently, as the mother is working in gogo bars and everytime I see her out at the clubs, she's with a different old fat white guy.

I'm going to bed now. I imagine we'll see more abuse directed at me tomorrow. "Oh, poor kid, I hope he doesn't get custody" Blah blah blah, whatever, spare me, please.

[cdnvic]

Onionman, you made posts here at 2.49am,2.50am and said nothing about your phone call to her etc. You the post at 3.07am saying "I managed to get her on the phone a few hours ago." I was about to offer advice on this subject but now I'm finding it somewhat difficult to believe the whole story...

Oh well, it keeps us entertained. You didn't honestly think that someone could be this much of an idiot did you? Of course it's a wind up.

[permanent_disorder]

i think that girl loves you. ever consider this? and this is not a WHY question you can answer if someone shouting at you on the phone.

no reason to call her selfish or crazy (or maybe just for the reason that she loves such 'gentleman' you are).

and your reactions here just prove that you are in no way somewhat emotional stable. and that you are not grown up enough to be a dad.

for sure, it can be shocking to get the news that there will be a child soon. shocking for both sexes, the mother and the father.

her minds will rotating same as yours.

how old are the both of you?

she was loving and take care you for a year and no doubt you treat her the same good way in the past. now she acting strange, for whatver reason, yes maybe she have emotional problems. but you should help her, be there for her, talk to her, explain all your worries and thats not the right time for to become a father, that your are not yet in a career position to provide the best for your kid or for the family. have a child is a big responsibility you are not ready to take on. try to talk her out of the idea of having a baby. a human being kicked unasked in this world the child maybe not like. talk about uncertain times. no question that child should be unborn for various causes. but abortion is not an easy decision, speak to her with words of reason and don't put her under pressure. thats the only thing you can do. and a gentleman should do.

if that not works, face it and provide support for your offspring and not just financial one, even if you are not together with the mother anymore. also a thing a gentleman should do.

[BambinA]

To the OP, let do HCG test ,so you will know your girl gets pregnant or not.

As I have read, you said you were mad at her, and it was hard to check her urine.

This is my advice. Call her and make she know that you want to re-union.

Feed her plenty coffee, caffeine makes people want to pee. Then ask her for a casual sex..and tell her u want golden rain(on your face)! .. (keep the pregnant testing stick with you)

Joking yeah. You had better use the xsss size of condom instead of believing in pill.

Check yourself about STD later.

Many women make a trap for guys as skip the pill. However, a year for living/phunking with her !!

If she gets pregnant, you have no right to force her to get abortion.

Edited November 6, 2007 by sbk

[Mighty Mouse]

You can see 'em coming a mile away.

Edited November 5, 2007 by Mighty Mouse

[wolfmanjack]

Anyway, I'd also like to point out that my original question was about my LEGAL OBLIGATIONS. I want to know if she's gonna have my by my balls for 18 years.

One can only hope so. I know a very good law firm. They would be very happy to help her nail your balls to the wall. Please feel free to have her contact me. We specialise is screwing shits over.

I think in thailand it is 20 years to the age of majority.

[kangeroo]

Why not just ask her ok how much do you want. pay, go , forget . BUT IF THERE IS LOVE TAKE CARE OF HER .

[mellow1]

Tell her that it cannot be your baby because you had a vasectomy,

a little trick I learned a few years ago

Actually a vasectomy would be recommended for single men who are not ready to become fathers. It can be reversed at a latter date. It can also save these individuals from similar problems, as well as not to put unwanted children into the world.

[mellow1]

Your financial obligations are next to nil. Two or three thousand baht a month, that's for the kid, none for the girl. And that's only if the kid is yours so do the DNA test. Fortunately Thailand isn't one of those liberal-infested places where your slut wife can push out another guy's kid and you get stuck for child support.

Your moral obligations are entirely up to you. Even if it is your kid and you don't want to deal, then don't deal. Just make sure you can live with yourself first. One more bastard kid in Thailand makes no particular difference in the greater scheme of things.

And I thought, I saw things in a negative way.

[mr_hippo]

I would appreciate any advice or sympathy.

And honestly, I don't care what anyone thinks.

So why are you posting?

I guess I need to say... she is not my girlfriend. I been dating her for almost a year. She lives in Hua Hin, I live in Bangkok. I she used to stay with me on weekends.

Yeah, good advice. Like I just said above here, I always use protection with every girl. Except for this girl after about 10 months we decided to get tested and get the pill.

I said she is crazy because she stopped taking the pill to intentionaly get pregnant without my concent.

So, how long was she taking the pill for? Do you think that it is effective from day 1?

[mellow1]

Anyway, I'd also like to point out that my original question was about my LEGAL OBLIGATIONS. I want to know if she's gonna have my by my balls for 18 years.

One can only hope so. I know a very good law firm. They would be very happy to help her nail your balls to the wall. Please feel free to have her contact me. We specialise is screwing shits over.

I think in thailand it is 20 years to the age of majority.

I have met a number of Thai women who have children out of wedlock(with Thai partner), or from a X- husband(Thai), I have yet to meet one who gets child support. I have also met several Thai women who had Farang X-partners or husbands and are getting paid. I currently know a woman who has a Thai child and never went after the Thai father for support. She also has a child from a Farang and is taking the Farang to court for child support. So much for the legal system and obligations be they moral or otherwise. Maybe the obligation to oneself has to take priority, right or wrong.

[Dakhar]

Anyway, I'd also like to point out that my original question was about my LEGAL OBLIGATIONS. I want to know if she's gonna have my by my balls for 18 years.

One can only hope so. I know a very good law firm. They would be very happy to help her nail your balls to the wall. Please feel free to have her contact me. We specialise is screwing shits over.

Come now Bendix, come back to reality. Getting money out of this character would be like squezing water from a rock. Child support would probably be around 20K USD at the most spread out over 18 years.... and the OP is upset about that! I would have to spend that plus more in a year in child support in the US, where they have real rules, and enforcement policies.

It is a bummer for both the woman and the child being stuck in this situation. Truth is, she more than likely will farm the child out too.

[jayjayjayjay]

I am not sure if this is some crazy lie or not.

the 130,000% positive lie can be solve with a 130 baht trip to your local chemist shop. Over the counter ask for kit to test "truat thong" or whatever they call it, someone else will surely advise here... Anyway, they are as reliable as you need to have this sent to the cleaners for sure. Instructions normally in dual language.............

Good enough to shag but not good enough to live with ???????????? suffer

Wooooooooooowww Bambina................................. I'll never cross you babe, that's some firey language,,, 55555

Edited November 6, 2007 by jayjayjayjay

[t.s]

Has anyone else noticed how quickly Onionman has mastered the art of the "multi-quote" function (after only a couple of posts). Don't know about you but it took me a long time to learn that.

tv isn't the only forum on the web.

those of us under 60 dont have that much trouble with these new fangled compooter things. quoting isnt exactly rocket science.

again i am astounded by the moral indignation the tv population can muster from their armchairs.

onionman does sound selfish, but i a similar situation my reaction was exactly the same. while i realised my obligation, i also understood that the whole situation was so far wrong that abortion was the only option. I have never regretted that choice.

i never had a problem with the issue of a child, i did not want to spend the rest of my life with the dead weight of its mother around my neck.

5 years later, my daughter happened and my immediate reaction was to repeat the past. it is a debate i could never have won and never argued. again i do not regret the decison, she is the best thing i have ever done.

as i said in an earlier post - unfortunately, if he is the father, he has very little say in the outcome.

all this talk of contracts between consenting adults could not be more moot.

[jstumbo]

Come now Bendix, come back to reality. Getting money out of this character would be like squezing water from a rock. Child support would probably be around 20K USD at the most spread out over 18 years.... and the OP is upset about that! I would have to spend that plus more in a year in child support in the US, where they have real rules, and enforcement policies.

It is a bummer for both the woman and the child being stuck in this situation. Truth is, she more than likely will farm the child out too.

Bummer for the woman? She is the one that decided to not take the birth control pills while telling the guy that she was, because she wanted to get pregnant. How is that a bummer for her? She is not "stuck" in this situation, she created the whole situation in the first place.

The guy is asking what his legal responsibilities will be. He does not know if he is going to get stuck paying a US level of support, if 25%+ of his Thai paycheck is going to go to this woman, or if it will only be a couple thousand baht a month.

[xyborg]

Bloody hel_l is this drivel still running?? I thought my g/f in bed with her Brother was far better!! Its your own fault dont trust anyone and stick a rubba on at all times unless you've know her a long time. Pay up and shut up but ask for proof. Problem solved, next?

[Momo8]

5 years later, my daughter happened and my immediate reaction was to repeat the past. it is a debate i could never have won and never argued. again i do not regret the decison, she is the best thing i have ever done.

She was pregnant for five years?

Edited November 6, 2007 by Momo8

[altman]

all this talk of contracts between consenting adults could not be more moot.

a person who is incapable of entering into and abiding by the terms of a contract is not a person that is fit to raise a child, nor one with whom another sensible person would want to spend the rest of their lives.

so i would say the issue of contracts between adults is fundamentally germane to the discussion.

the baby is not yet born so is not yet a determining factor.

the fact of her pregnancy is yet to be established so that is probably a first step, followed by determination of the father.

only then do you need to start worrying about what to do about it.

and only after that decision has been agreed upon, or unilaterally enforced, do you need to worry about financial obligations, and you will have 8 more months to consider those.

then you can start to worry about how to meet them and who they will be going to.

by then your worries are just beginning so you might as well...

... stop worrying.

[Dakhar]

Come now Bendix, come back to reality. Getting money out of this character would be like squezing water from a rock. Child support would probably be around 20K USD at the most spread out over 18 years.... and the OP is upset about that! I would have to spend that plus more in a year in child support in the US, where they have real rules, and enforcement policies.

It is a bummer for both the woman and the child being stuck in this situation. Truth is, she more than likely will farm the child out too.

Bummer for the woman? She is the one that decided to not take the birth control pills while telling the guy that she was, because she wanted to get pregnant. How is that a bummer for her? She is not "stuck" in this situation, she created the whole situation in the first place.

The guy is asking what his legal responsibilities will be. He does not know if he is going to get stuck paying a US level of support, if 25%+ of his Thai paycheck is going to go to this woman, or if it will only be a couple thousand baht a month.

What is the saying, Sam Na Na. Wrap it up, no glove, no love.