Setting Your Thai Inlaws Up To Self Sustain

[LoveDaBlues]

I am married to a Thai lady, we lived in Bangkok for 11months, and have been in the UK for 3 years in total. my wife has constantly sent money to her parents and I figured that if we got them to invest some of our money they could perhaps almost self sustain, and not need my wife to constantly poor money into them.

My wife's mum has 6 adopted children to look after and her father earns 220baht a day. they own a plot of 8rai of land in the province of Petchabun and live in a wodden house which needs knocking down and replacing with a better structure. the village they live in has a population of about 1000ppl, its very poor and off the beacon tourist track.

they suggested selling stuff out of a pick up truck or even recycling using a pick up truck, but to do this my father in law would need too give up his job, which is a risk too high to take.

I don't know what really to suggest for them too do. perhaps a specialist shop, a buffett food bar on the local highway 30 km away. A family member makes profit on selling pc's, perhaps they could open the first ever pc shop in the village of one-pee-kune, near bang sam phan..

we have about 150,000 baht for them to invest, I just want to make sure they invest in a good well though out idea..

OP, don't discount the idea of selling out of the truck. You must do a little 'rural market research' first but I can tell you about my experience.

My Thai in-laws where in a similar situation. Understandable as it's hard to generate more than a few baht a day in these rural locations. I had a used truck-enclosure (not sure how to describe it) installed on their pickup. It's the kind that has a single up-swinging door in the back and the rest is solid so stuff can't be stolen out of it easily. This truck is basically a mobile 7-11. They sell all sorts of stuff: shoes, soap, shampoo, etc. Remember, in these rural areas a lot of the folks have no means of transportation and rely on the weekly 'market' for their day-to-day items. Anyway, they sell 7 days a week at different village markets. Things have been going quite well. The mum-in-law has managed to get a couple of leases and she controls 2 of the markets. The other vendors who sell must pay her a fee; she pockets the difference between the lease and the vendor payments. A tidy little extra AND she saves the money she would pay if she didn't have the lease. The BEST reason though for controlling the market is you decide who can/can't sell. In this way the mum-in-law has a monopoly on the stuff she sells.

You don't need near 150K to start an operation like this. Don't rush into this or any other business though. It takes a lot of research and also some job skills by those involved.

Good luck in whatever you try; it's great you're trying to give the family a hand up.

ps - don't think a small business 30km away is a good idea.

[TonyLeung]

become a loan shark.

[blizzard]

or pray one of the kids marry a farang who is more interested in investing money to make this family self sufficient. you got 6 chances, odds look good to me.

[WaiWai]

i guess so especially if the guy giving the family money to be self sufficient says so.

Heh . Blizzard does get some good shots in.

I am becoming a fan .

[Spee]

is anyone able to tell im not questioning baggys intent. just his claim of a poverty stricken family attaining self suficncy without a whole lot of farang money.

I hate to burst your bubble, but the most of the world thrives, succeeds and grows because of investment. Some investments are charitable. Some investments are for profit. Some could be both. Though a much smaller version, Bagwan's situation seems to be no different than the private capital "angel investors" who drove the technology boom of the 1990's and to a lesser degree do the same thing in the 2000's. There wouldn't be a Yahoo, or a Google, or an Amazon or any other number of successful companies without some sort of venture capital investment. The Japanese car companies wouldn't have boomed in the 80's & 90's without huge capital investment by American car companies in the 60's & 70's. This is no different, a venture capital investment on a smaller scale and for different motives. The fact that the investment is for the general benefit of the family is even better, an investment of the heart so to speak. That you seem to be sarcastically turning your nose up at it, like western men should avoid trying to help their Thai partner's family if they have means and inclination, seems a bit disturbing.

[blizzard]

huh?

if you say supporting a village family is venture capitalism in action , so be it.

IM SAYING OP SHOULD KEEP SENDING THE MONEY , WHAT THE H ...E LL YOU READING. IM SAYING OP SHOULD NOT EXPECT WIFE TO DITCH FAMILY.

IT IS THESE MEN WHO MARRY POOR VILLAGE GURLS WHO DONT WANT TO GIVE MUNNEY TO VILLAGERS.

PS CAN SOMEONE CONFIRM JAPANESE CAR COMPANIES R WHERE THEY R TODAY COZ OF HUGE INVESTMNTS MADE BACK IN THE DAY BY GM, FORD, ETC.. OH MY FR...KIN GOD!

WHO MAKES CHARITABLE INVESTMENTS? WHY DONT THEY JUST GIVE CHARITY. OH MY GOD. DO YOU REALIZE WOT YOU R POSTING,

Edited December 1, 2007 by blizzard

[YaiJung]

Poverty is relative (as is being poor, middle class, or well to do).

The important thing is to set realistic "baby step" type achievable goals. They in all likelihood won't be moving up like George and Wheezy. These folks aren't living in difficult conditions because their Dell stock tanked or because they had a bad harvest last year or whatever... they likely achieved their current status over multiple generations. There's no quick fix.

I completely agree with this.

My two cents, if you want to help the family out of kindness and love for your wife, keep the 150,000 and invest it yourself. This way you don't throw the money away and you can still dole out their monthly allowance.

Whatever you do, I wish you the best of luck.

[blizzard]

montlhly allowance sound s so bad sir. monthly charitable investment sounds more politically correct.

[wilko]

The easiest way is with a simple ceremony at any temple - you gather the in-laws together and a few monks and standing in front of your in-laws take out and open your wallet and say the sacred words "Help yourself".....

(with thanks to S.M.)

Edited December 2, 2007 by wilko

[siamamerican]

I am married to a Thai lady, we lived in Bangkok for 11months, and have been in the UK for 3 years in total. my wife has constantly sent money to her parents and I figured that if we got them to invest some of our money they could perhaps almost self sustain, and not need my wife to constantly poor money into them.

My wife's mum has 6 adopted children to look after and her father earns 220baht a day. they own a plot of 8rai of land in the province of Petchabun and live in a wodden house which needs knocking down and replacing with a better structure. the village they live in has a population of about 1000ppl, its very poor and off the beacon tourist track.

they suggested selling stuff out of a pick up truck or even recycling using a pick up truck, but to do this my father in law would need too give up his job, which is a risk too high to take.

I don't know what really to suggest for them too do. perhaps a specialist shop, a buffett food bar on the local highway 30 km away. A family member makes profit on selling pc's, perhaps they could open the first ever pc shop in the village of one-pee-kune, near bang sam phan..

we have about 150,000 baht for them to invest, I just want to make sure they invest in a good well though out idea..

Your mother in law should be commended for her generosity. I don't have any insight into your financial means, but I would start with improving their dilapidated home. 150k isn't enough to build a new home that would accommodate their large family. Send 10k or whatever you can afford every few months to help with basic needs. When you have 300-400k, build a new house.

Maybe after building the home, look into financing a business. The chances of success are slim, but in the end they will have a roof over their head.

I was faced with similar issues 5 years back and after financing a few failed business ventures, opted to tear down their awful house and replaced it with a basic 3 bedroom home. That was close to year ago and the family has never been happier.

On a side note; since the house was built, her family became self sufficient. I can't remember, other than a couple thousand for her sisters kid's birthdays, sending any money.

[LoveDaBlues]

I am married to a Thai lady, we lived in Bangkok for 11months, and have been in the UK for 3 years in total. my wife has constantly sent money to her parents and I figured that if we got them to invest some of our money they could perhaps almost self sustain, and not need my wife to constantly poor money into them.

My wife's mum has 6 adopted children to look after and her father earns 220baht a day. they own a plot of 8rai of land in the province of Petchabun and live in a wodden house which needs knocking down and replacing with a better structure. the village they live in has a population of about 1000ppl, its very poor and off the beacon tourist track.

they suggested selling stuff out of a pick up truck or even recycling using a pick up truck, but to do this my father in law would need too give up his job, which is a risk too high to take.

I don't know what really to suggest for them too do. perhaps a specialist shop, a buffett food bar on the local highway 30 km away. A family member makes profit on selling pc's, perhaps they could open the first ever pc shop in the village of one-pee-kune, near bang sam phan..

we have about 150,000 baht for them to invest, I just want to make sure they invest in a good well though out idea..

Your mother in law should be commended for her generosity. I don't have any insight into your financial means, but I would start with improving their dilapidated home. 150k isn't enough to build a new home that would accommodate their large family. Send 10k or whatever you can afford every few months to help with basic needs. When you have 300-400k, build a new house.

Maybe after building the home, look into financing a business. The chances of success are slim, but in the end they will have a roof over their head.

I was faced with similar issues 5 years back and after financing a few failed business ventures, opted to tear down their awful house and replaced it with a basic 3 bedroom home. That was close to year ago and the family has never been happier.

On a side note; since the house was built, her family became self sufficient. I can't remember, other than a couple thousand for her sisters kid's birthdays, sending any money.

This is great and I'm doing something similar. The in-laws house was to the point of being unsafe. I told the mum-in-law if she could get a bank loan in her name I'd make the payments. She got a loan for 400K and the rebuild/expansion is nearly complete. Home looks great with western style toilets now and also hot water for the showers. Mum-in-law is so proud of her new kitchen.....it's beautiful. The size of the home was increased by about 30%. The monthly payback is 3500 baht, heck I tipped more than that for meals in the US! As you can imagine I'm jai dee mak mak but more importantly the childred in the home have a safe place to live and grow. The biz I helped start for them is going strong after 6 months. We're on a roll; it IS possible to lift a Thai family out of poverty but it takes capital, love, luck, research, and hard work by the family. If the family doesn't want to raise themselves up it's a lost cause. Fortunately my Thai family work hard and don't gamble or drink which is the downfall of many here.

[blizzard]

building houses for poor is ez part. tell us bout yr successful biz you started for family mr blues,

i also do think farangs can raise the standard of living of their spouses families , its just that its gonna take a whole lot of money (150,000 is just enuff to start)and work.

Edited December 2, 2007 by blizzard

[torrenova]

Before you even think about this assistance you have to look at what they are currently doing. You also have to look at who else contributes and what their outgoings are. I'm sorry to say but if they have DVD players, a LCD TV, a truck or motorbike on credit and local loans whilst still having holes in the roof of their house then you are on a hiding to nothing. They have already decided that material things are more important than hard work or personal investment.

The OP does not state what they do with the land they currently have so advising the purchase of more land to lay idle is not a sound idea. Investing the Bt150,000 himself will yield perhaps Bt10,000 per annum. Too little to be of assistance so rule that out. We do not know how much the OP's wife sends and how often. That information is required.

I'd say the investment amount was too little and also too great.

The village at 1000 people is too small to sustain any meaningful business so they must look further afield and see whether there is a sufficient population nearby to support some form of retail business. That would entail transport and travelling costs however.

The only asset they have is land is appears. Therefore, firstly investigate whether that land can be better farmed to produce more income. You hear stories about chillies being the latest cash crop. There will be others. If the land needs some investment, then this may be the best place to start.

Papa earns Bt220 per day or some 6k+ depending upon the number of days worked. It is unlikely the land can substitute more than this coupled with its current yield. Bt150k will unlikely change this equasion. So papa needs to retain his job whilst others work the land or other business. Are there people around in the family, currently unemployed, to do this ?

To me it looks like we need far more information than we currently have before any meaningful conclusions can be obtained and any realistic advice offered.

[blizzard]

holy shit! now heres a reallistic assesment of op position by torrenova.

seems too many just say farm the freekin land. pop aint got the time to farm and op doesnt want him to quit his current job. wife will then have to increase monthly charitable investment.

torre, u forgot to point out family lacks edukation.

ps im of the opionion that there is no realistic advice that can be given that works within op parameters.

Edited December 2, 2007 by blizzard

[slapout]

If op would give additional info as requested above, please include age, gender and number of people in household and I am sure he will get more suggestions. ( acceptable and/or useful remains to be seen)

[blizzard]

fascinating topic.

ok so youve upgraded yr wife familys standard of living. what does it feel like to know the family probably respects and lubs you coz youve proven yrself to be mr moneybags. i personally wouldnt be able to handle it.

and not becoz your a kind good man who is wiling to give their daughter a good life.

[Arkady]

Most villagers unfortunately have no idea how to set up and manage a business. Chances are that your B150k would disappear quickly used to buy things not needed for the investment and/or to pay off debts for themselves or others. This was the problem of Thaksin's B1 million village fund which was supposed to be repayable debt to help small businesses but mainly got spent on consumer goods supplied by Thaksin and his cronies in line with the his actual intention.

Whatever you give them, they are very unlikely ever to become self sufficient and will come back for more in record time. It is a matter of face for villagers to have a foreign son-in-law to support them and they like to compete with each other e.g. my Japanese son-in-law is much more generous than Old Mother Daeng's sticky as sh*t English one. The Jap built me a house for B3 million and my daughter sends B30k a month. By marrying the daughter of a poor peasant family you have entered into a social contract to support them, whatever you wife might have assured you at the time. If you are unwilling to fulfill this contract, you wife will be vilified as a non-filial daughter, unwilling to share her good fortune to help her family, and she will suffer unlimited heart ache that she will attribute to your meaness and lack of understanding. The fact that you and your wife let the old boy (they are old at 45) do manual labour for B220 a day is no doubt already regarded as highly shameful in the village.

If you have spare funds, put them in a safe, high yield investment in the UK and resign yourself to paying the monthly stipend for ever. Do not consider sending a lump sum, unless you are prepared to consider it as a gift that in no way effects your monthly obligation. Sorry if this sounds harsh, but you need to face the reality of the situation in order to come to terms with it and deal with it effectively.

[blizzard]

another delightful post. good job arkady. at leas some have taken off thier rose colored glasses to see real life in the sticks.

one thing it has been said japs dont marry village gurls, i dont know if true or not but does make sense to me.

[johnnynmonic]

I am married to a Thai lady, we lived in Bangkok for 11months, and have been in the UK for 3 years in total. my wife has constantly sent money to her parents and I figured that if we got them to invest some of our money they could perhaps almost self sustain, and not need my wife to constantly poor money into them.

In rural Thailand, having a Farang son-in-law is the definition of self-sufficiency. The best thing you can do is find an investment for yourself that will generate a few thousand baat a month and that will eventually pay off the original investment, and then you send that generated income in your in-law's direction.

This.

[siamamerican]

This is great and I'm doing something similar. The in-laws house was to the point of being unsafe. I told the mum-in-law if she could get a bank loan in her name I'd make the payments. She got a loan for 400K and the rebuild/expansion is nearly complete. Home looks great with western style toilets now and also hot water for the showers. Mum-in-law is so proud of her new kitchen.....it's beautiful. The size of the home was increased by about 30%. The monthly payback is 3500 baht, heck I tipped more than that for meals in the US! As you can imagine I'm jai dee mak mak but more importantly the childred in the home have a safe place to live and grow. The biz I helped start for them is going strong after 6 months. We're on a roll; it IS possible to lift a Thai family out of poverty but it takes capital, love, luck, research, and hard work by the family. If the family doesn't want to raise themselves up it's a lost cause. Fortunately my Thai family work hard and don't gamble or drink which is the downfall of many here.

It has been a great experience. Not sure if they got more satisfaction out of it than I have. I've given-up on trying to assist in starting a business, but some day may have a change of heart. Now that most the family for the first time since I've known them is working, I don't want to mess things up. Their household income is roughly 15k and that allows them to live semi comfortably. Unlike your Thai family, my wife's family is a mixed bag of hard workers, drinkers, and gamblers, but the dysfunctional unit seems to be succeeding and enjoying themselves

Edited December 2, 2007 by siamamerican

[grazer]

Hello

I can only go by my own experience. I just gave the money and my in-laws did with it what they wanted. They bought a new tractor which they used to build a bigger dam on their land. They raise fish in that dam, and now have water to keep their crops going in the drier months. The tractor makes things generally more productive overall.

My sister in law and her husband bought a pick up which they use to drive around collecting fruit which they then sell.

I note there are a lot of naysayers on this post saying give them the money, which they will then waste - I think you are the only one that can make that call. I am sure there are families that would blow 150k or 150m and have nothing to show for it, and there are other families that would make wise use of the money. Trying to characterise all Thais as the same is like saying that all Americans drive pick up trucks and shoot hippies.

I guess there are no magic bullets for your 150k though. If they have ideas then they can put the money to use on those ideas, but I wouldn't bother trying to get them involved in something they know nothing about. In fact the secret to any success is to do what you know best.

[Arkady]

another delightful post. good job arkady. at leas some have taken off thier rose colored glasses to see real life in the sticks.

one thing it has been said japs dont marry village gurls, i dont know if true or not but does make sense to me.

Actually Blizzard that was a real life example. I still remember being shown the tasteless, flashy villlage house built with Japanese money that was held up as shining example for prospective sons-in-law. There are perhaps not so many Japs that openly marry Thai women as there is a lot of pressure to conform and have a Jap wife to get up the corporate ladder. However, there are a large number that take girls from the Japanese karaokes and massage places in Bkk as mia nois and support them (and their under the counter Thai boyfriends) with great generosity. For Japanese men it is a status symbol to have mia nois, so the arrangement works well from both sides. I recently heard a funny story about a Japanese guy who came to a massage parlour and made a big fuss about the fact that his girlfriend was back there working again, despite the salary he was paying her to go straight and wait for him by the phone.

Despite the lifelong obligation to support the kin of village girls, I still think it is preferable to marrying into a snooty Thai-Chinese family. I have seen several guys' marriages to well educated Thai women fall apart because of the social pressures to spend a lot of money to keep up with the Joneses e.g. I am so ashamed that we have to show up to Mummy and Daddy's for Sunday lunch in your terrible old banger. When will you get a decent car that I can be seen dead in (i.e. a brand new Benz for B5 million)? Needless to say the obligatory weekly lunch with the wife's Chinese family is also a torturous affair listening to their nouveau riche posturings. At least Thai peasants still embody traditional Thai values, even if that includes their traditional love for patronage and hand outs.

[blizzard]

arkady,

i do believe japanese men support thire female entertainers they fall for generously . but they know not to marry them.

and i do believe not all village people r same same but one wil l encounter the same issues time and time again when dealing with them. sex of course first.....lol, then support of gurls family right behind.

Edited December 2, 2007 by blizzard

[siamamerican]

fascinating topic.

ok so youve upgraded yr wife familys standard of living. what does it feel like to know the family probably respects and lubs you coz youve proven yrself to be mr moneybags. i personally wouldnt be able to handle it.

and not becoz your a kind good man who is wiling to give their daughter a good life.

Blizzard,

Stop worrying about what others think. Do you think Thais are second class humans that don't have the capacity to respect generosity? Are you the type that criticizes those that attempt to help others, because you lack the means or kindness to do so yourself?

Your constant confrontational posts don't hide your low self esteem. Your posts are becoming more coherent and in the near future, maybe you will have a meaningful thought. I'm surprised your mummy lets you spend so much time on the Internet. Get outside and make some friends. Really, most people are not as ridiculous as you.

[Arkady]

Hello

I can only go by my own experience. I just gave the money and my in-laws did with it what they wanted. They bought a new tractor which they used to build a bigger dam on their land. They raise fish in that dam, and now have water to keep their crops going in the drier months. The tractor makes things generally more productive overall.

My sister in law and her husband bought a pick up which they use to drive around collecting fruit which they then sell.

I note there are a lot of naysayers on this post saying give them the money, which they will then waste - I think you are the only one that can make that call. I am sure there are families that would blow 150k or 150m and have nothing to show for it, and there are other families that would make wise use of the money. Trying to characterise all Thais as the same is like saying that all Americans drive pick up trucks and shoot hippies.

I guess there are no magic bullets for your 150k though. If they have ideas then they can put the money to use on those ideas, but I wouldn't bother trying to get them involved in something they know nothing about. In fact the secret to any success is to do what you know best.

Good that this has worked well for you. The key is probably that you let them do what they wanted with the money without any great expectations. Yours also sound as if they have a lot more land that they can do stuff on. The OP said his only have 8 rai which is hardly enough for a Northeastern politician or police general to build a modest house on. I have also provided money to pay off debts and buy land but I never had any idea that this or any other "investment" would let me off the hook from my monthly obligation. In fact buying the land created another obligation to pay to plant trees on it - a long term crop that will hopefully pay them a dividend in a few years time with minimum hassle. If it works out, as in your case, that's great but it's best to consider the obligation before getting married and not to marry an Asian peasant's daughter with distorted Western ideas about every one being either self sufficient or supported by a welfare state. Looking at it the other way round, if a relatively well off foreigner came to England and married an Essex girl from a council estate whose parents are unskilled workers, any financial contributions would no doubt be appreciated but they have been socially conditioned to rely on the state for healthcare, education and pensions and might not ask for a lot. Thai villagers on the other hand are socially conditioned to rely on their children and if you marry one of them you should accept that, or look for an Essex girl, if you can't accept their culture. Any land that you pay for should be in the wife or girlfriend's name with the title deed in your safe to prevent the in laws from hocking it.

[blizzard]

i dont think thais r second clss humans but i think many others think they are.

i just want to understand can the farang be loved by village for just being a good human, not a $ sign.

seems many say cannot and those that say can, their story does not back them up.

those that seem to get along in the sticks know the rules. your mney is also the vlages money.

Edited December 2, 2007 by blizzard

[CTM]

in usa to make money farming one has to put in a lot of money, and still its no guarantee the money will roll in is thailand different?

No. Unless you have mechanized farming on thousands of rai which is preferably leased from the Government for a pittance of true value due to some well connected “friends”, don’t expect to make much.

[LoveDaBlues]

in usa to make money farming one has to put in a lot of money, and still its no guarantee the money will roll in is thailand different?

No. Unless you have mechanized farming on thousands of rai which is preferably leased from the Government for a pittance of true value due to some well connected “friends”, don’t expect to make much.

I have cousins in the US who are farmers and they work really hard for not a lot of money. It's the same here but worse lol.

The only way I'd get into farming was if I was reasonably sure of getting a good price for my crop. Thats nearly impossible here; one year sugarcane can be 1500 baht and the next year 700 lol. We just harvested 50 sacks of rice (roughly 4000 pds.) but thats for family consumption only and not profit. Still the money saved helps a lot. FYI, in Issan the average Thai adult eats roughly 10 sacks of rice a year!!! That's a lot of rice!!!

[blizzard]

then please explain to me when family has small piece of land why many say to farm it. i think its hogshit advice but people keep sayin it.

sorry if i offended any of you.

Edited December 2, 2007 by blizzard

[siamamerican]

i dont think thais r second clss humans but i think many others think they are.

i just want to understand can the farang be loved by village for just being a good human, not a $ sign.

seems many say cannot and those that say can, their story does not back them up.

Poor people, regardless of nationality, are capable of loving or respecting kindness. Do more people than not take advantage of kindness - I don't know. I'm tight with my money, but at times have given some of it to others. I think my kindness has been respected, but maybe it hasn't. In the end, the money went to good use most of the time. Nothing wrong with trying to help those that might need it. Sure seems better than insulting those that make an attempt.

Over the years, I've become better at giving wisely. The OP was asking for advise on how to best use his money to help his in-laws. He has received some great advise and will most likely still make mistakes. With any luck, his kindness will improve his in-laws life.