I've Finally Found Her...

[appleman_thai]

GS,

I admire your honesty and admire that you are trying to make a good go of things with Ning but you aint the first and certainly wont be the last to go thru this!

Do you really believe that you can have a serious long term relationship with her? Or are you just after some excitement - and what better than to try and convert a WILD girl.

I reckon most farang guys here are lacking one major thing when it comes to relationships and that is a challenge. Back home you really have to make a serious effort - there is a lot of chasing and ground work that needs to be done. Its not the same here in Thailand - so perhaps you are finding your own version of this challenge?!??!?!

But my advice (FWIW) is to find a challenge with a girl who DOES work in 7 Eleven! I think you would have as big a challenge and are more likely to be successful in finding the perfect girl.

All this said - i wish you the best of luck - keep us updated...... its really thrilling stuff! Ever think about setting up a webcam in Hua Hin???

[bodypaul]

Scamp you must be mad. All lasting relationships are built on trust! Do you really trust her? I don't think you do as you would not have started this thread.

Keep it going mate .... It is better than Eastenders and Corrie put together

[falong]

Does your girlfriend mind, you making all these personal issues so public?

No she doesn't and for the first time she had a look at this thread this morning.

She understands that my intention is to put my money where my mouth is following my 'Bargirl Appreciation Thread' and prove all the cynics wrong - and she's all for that.

It's not like I've gone into detail about our sex life or her family history is it.

BTW: Nemsis - Call the guinness book of records, I don't think there's yet been a troll who's achieved over eight hundred posts. I'm a well established and very open member who's sharing my current experience and hopefully changing a few views in the process.

I was once in a relationship similar to yours. Was a rollercoaster ride--extreme emotional ups and downs. That was with my EX-wife. Those were hellish years.

Next time--LET HER GO. And there will, be a next time. You say you love her? Then respect her will and let her leave. You break down and cry making her feel guilty so she stays.--You are selfish. Get yourself some good farang friends down there and hang out with them for a while.

BTW: I called the guinness book of world records. Youre not even close. There are trolls who have posted 10's of thousands of posts. World record is 46377 posts.

[meemiathai]

No relationships could be smooth all the way. It really is if you can accept or solve the problems between the two of you for the rest of the time. If both of you have tried and it comes to a point that you/her can take no more, then that's it.

Me and my wife are very much in love, but it doesn't mean that we are always happy together. Still divorce is not one of the first priorities to solving our problems.

[mbkudu]

dont worry...scampy was a little depressed last night.As we all get sometimes!!

but a few beers and a good hard roll in the hay will see him posting today im sure...

Splitlid, your avitar disturbs me greatly.

[The Gentleman Scamp]

Does your girlfriend mind, you making all these personal issues so public?

No she doesn't and for the first time she had a look at this thread this morning.

She understands that my intention is to put my money where my mouth is following my 'Bargirl Appreciation Thread' and prove all the cynics wrong - and she's all for that.

It's not like I've gone into detail about our sex life or her family history is it.

BTW: Nemsis - Call the guinness book of records, I don't think there's yet been a troll who's achieved over eight hundred posts. I'm a well established and very open member who's sharing my current experience and hopefully changing a few views in the process.

I was once in a relationship similar to yours. Was a rollercoaster ride--extreme emotional ups and downs. That was with my EX-wife. Those were hellish years.

Next time--LET HER GO. And there will, be a next time. You say you love her? Then respect her will and let her leave. You break down and cry making her feel guilty so she stays.--You are selfish. Get yourself some good farang friends down there and hang out with them for a while.

BTW: I called the guinness book of world records. Youre not even close. There are trolls who have posted 10's of thousands of posts. World record is 46377 posts.

You're making a fair point Falong I'll give you that. I too was once in a relationship similar to mine but she was English, very very screwed up and very very attractive (Bad combo) and far worse than Ning is.

She (The farang ex) was bad from the word go but I was attracted to her and believed what I wanted to believe... This is somewhat different and it's also a challenge - I'm always attracted to challenges, sometimes the wrong ones, granted, but it's only made me more optomistic that she's 22 and not 27 because it's means she's not an immature 27 yr old that's worked for too long in 'the industry' to change.

I'm not like most guys so maybe I can break the mould with this one.

We'll see won't we.

P.S. Negative or otherwise, thanks for your input - never thought I'd say it but you're on the way to redeeming youself.

Gotta go, it's nearly 10:30 and she'll be here to pick me up soon - she's taking me out to a seafood restaurant to say thanks for giving her a chance.

I hope she doesn't put me on the same pedalstal as her dada - I'm just a nice bloke, there's plenty of us out there.

TBC

[ThaiPauly]

Quote Farong

I was once in a relationship similar to yours. Was a rollercoaster ride--extreme emotional ups and downs. That was with my EX-wife. Those were hellish years.

Next time--LET HER GO. And there will, be a next time. You say you love her? Then respect her will and let her leave. You break down and cry making her feel guilty so she stays.--You are selfish. Get yourself some good farang friends down there and hang out with them for a while. .

Farong, all relationships that end in disaster have extatic highs and extreme lows,

Normally the sex is great but outside of sex the relationship is rubbish.

IMHO if you have a steady relationship without confrontation and the extreme highs and lows that is a recipe for a successful marriage.

after 4 marriages I feel well qualified to speak on the matter, I have also been where you have, (though not with the same girl-unless her name was Jessica

[RDN]

I'm not like most guys so maybe I can break the mould with this one.

We'll see won't we.

There are a lot of us blokes out here just praying that this works out for you, Scampy. Good luck, don't give up, but don't love her 100% - leave a little bit, just in case.

[meemiathai]

I would say love her more than 100%!

[mbkudu]

don't love her 100% - leave a little bit, just in case.

These are words to live by. I have told my wife countless times, "I love you 99%,

the one percent is for me." I am dead serious when I say this. She whines and bitches at this, but gets over it.

[elsie]

I would say I agree with mbkudu and RDN. Love her a lot. But not 100%. Save a little bit for yourself. I used to love someone more than 100%. It didn't go well. Or maybe it just didn't suit me. I don't know..

[SoCal]

BTW she is a psycho when she's really upset

Ah, the psycho chick. Best sex ever.

Had to show mine the door when she stabbed me.

Good luck Scamp.

PS- Cocaine is better than yaba. What the ###### are you talking about?

Keep us well informed summer is over now, and your the closest thing I have to the thrill of a roller coaster.

[SoCal]

Also Scamp, I know she would never lie to you , but if she is still or gets involved back in the drugs, and you/she get caught, it is your apartment, and.....................................

[The Gentleman Scamp]

I'm not like most guys so maybe I can break the mould with this one.

We'll see won't we.

There are a lot of us blokes out here just praying that this works out for you, Scampy. Good luck, don't give up, but don't love her 100% - leave a little bit, just in case.

DAY 13

RDN, good old RDN - Huski, give this man quote of the day!

I very much agree with that and until last night I had loved her maybe 58% and now I love her 99%.

Last night at the restaurant, we had such a good, mature conversation, talking about Thaksin, the purchase of 6 A380 aircraft by Thai Airways and the new Bangkok govener.

When talking about bargirls in the eye of Thaivisa.com she listened as I said that most men who speak bad about bar girls were probably stung because they had treated them like hookers and with disrespect and that if you are good to them they will be good to you back as I said in the BG Appreciation thread.

And do you know what she said????

She said "NO, all of the people on your Thai internet are RIGHT to be worry about me because most bar girls ARE bad, most of them is wery wery <deleted>*king bitch!!! I KNOW, I working wit them before and many have Thai boyfrien and not care abou anyone, not ewen their frien, and they make falang guy fall in love wit them just so they can get the money, they only care abou the money!! Maybe more than 70% is like this, maybe only 30% have good heart...

...That why I not angry with ewerybody speaking abou me on Thai wisa"

After that the last pole of scaffolding was loaded onto the truck and my heart was there in all it's former gory. The barriers came down (except the emergency one) and I felt happy and free and leant across the table and gave her a big hug, knocking my Heiniken into my duck curry.

After, we went to one of the beer bars where she has made her only friend here so far - a fat Thai DJ who is copying the Dido cd for her. She loves to sing to Dido, and it's the worst singing voice I have ever heard, how can something so beautiful make such an awful noise?

Following that she wanted a game of pool so I watched with pride as she beat a couple of Germans so we could have a game.

By now she was geting drunk, but she still looked great in her drainpipe jeans and white blouse. As I drove us through town, she put her arms round me and squeezed me so tight I thought my liver would touch the roof of my mouth.

We sat on the beach with a big bottle of Heiniken and made love on the sand, then we stod up, completely starkers and ran into the sea where I watched the illuminations of the disturbed phospherescence in the water.

Then I drove us back to the apt and we had a shower before snuggling up in bed and being all lovey dovey. We didn't have crazy psycho sex and as yet we never have - I hope that will come with time.

We talked about her beloved dad and his wife, Daphne, in Ireland and she told me to ignore my dad's nasty, glib criticism and that he had no excuse just because he didn't bring me up, and she also advised me never to borrow money off anyone, especially family and that I'd done okay so far by standing on my own two feet.

She has not been on any contraception for over a year and we need to go to the clinic and sort her injection out which she is reluctant to do because when she was 7yrs old she had a tettanus jab administered by a nurse who assured her it would be like an ant bite. She showed me the same, moody "Don't want to!" childish scowl she probably gave back then.

She likes the odd sniff of cocaine and want's to do it with me sometime, preferably when and if we go to the U.K. she says, which would be next year. It's again something she associates with her party past and the only drug she says she'd try again but only on special occasions. The gist of what she was saying is that it's an expensive treat like caviar and should be treated as so but not whilst in Thailand as it's too risky nowadays.

Before she switched off the light, she did one of the loudest and boldest farts I have ever heard from a man, let alone a lady, and then she pulled the covers over my head, asking me if it smelled.

She has no tattoos so to see her happily ironing my shirt it would be hard to believe her past.

It amazes me that if it hadn't been for a number of factors on the night of wed 25th August - including Tornado, a phone call from Splitlid and a pool game with an ex - then we never would have met. She had been in Bangkok just one day and HATED it because it reminded her of her past and of the BG friends that were not really friends at all. She says she didn't love me when we met but she liked me and she couldn't turn down the oppertunity to get out of BKK, though she was reluctant at first because she didn't want to sponge off me, although she's now scratching my back in that dept.

12Call even rang last night to get an update and tell me to keep this thread alive as it was gaining a lot of interest - which I am surprised but flattered by. Ning had stuck her face in front of mine to squeal - "Hellooo one too call!!! How are you?!!"

We were in the same bar in which the posted photo of us was taken - quite possibly the most inaccurate photo I have ever seen of myself, and a pretty bad one of Ning - looks nothing like her, but with Georges permission, I would like to end this thread with a proper, sober photo of us as soon as we get one done.

I think I have won my case, and it seems that the flamers have already zipped up their laptops and gone hunting elsewhere. But to be honest, when I started this post I wasn't sure about her, and now it's all just fine.

[ThaiPauly]

Good Luck Scamp. Your experiences are not disimilar to mine, we have made it through two years, the first with me flying back and forth to faranland.

your relationship CAN work, not all are doomed from day 1. I take my hat off to you for baring yourself the way you have.

I will look forward to hearing more positive feedback in the future.

BE HAPPY-we are all a long time dead, grab it while you can, you are right to let your heart go.

All the best

TP

[The Gentleman Scamp]

Cheers TP - I be me seeking your advice in future regarding taking girlfriends back home for a holiday.

Maybe I should call the nice lady I know at the embassy and tell her how it is, ex BG and all. Honesty hasn't done me too much harm thus far.

I know next year there will be lots of paperwork and hassle and proof needed (inc photos) that we are the couple we will be claiming to be.

I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.

[cutethaigirl]

She likes the odd sniff of cocaine and want's to do it with me sometime, preferably when and if we go to the U.K. she says, which would be next year.

Well if this is being read by the UK Embassy i am sure you will have no problem getting a Visa then.

I was going to go buy a story book to read today but this message at thaivisa is much better so thank you Mr Scamp for saving me some Baht.

Just in case you miss.....you are happy for this girl to introduce you to illegal drugs

[Narachon]

Mr. Scamp, Your story gets more and more interesting as it goes along!

But I'm sure that you two will have a very interesting future together!

Have you ever thought about writing a book about your experiences? I personally think you're a pretty good writer! Your whole story seems to have all the elements of a good novel! The Poor wayward, but bright and nice English guy, the beautiful and mysterious Thai woman with the shady past, the resort town they move to, etc....While I've still yet to read any of the popular books based on Thailand, who knows, you might just be the next Dean Barett!

I really think your talents are being wasted.....You do seem to love to write, as evident by your postings here..... And I'm sure you have stories to tell, now, and in the future...

You should do what you have the inspiration and need to do......Just something to think about...While you're making 95 baht an hour......

Remember, save some material for your book!

( Hey, you could call it , "The Beach"......Uhh.....What? That title's been taken?

[mbkudu]

What the h#ll mate! Just do it. You're young and if you fall down you can just dust yourself off and get up again. Many of the old farts on here are afraid to dip a toe in the water because if they get f####d over too badly, it could be the end. I'm 37 now and started, this thing called Thaialnd, when I was 23. It has been a smooth and at times he##ishly rough road, but it has to be done. I feel for the late bloomers who retire at 55 or 60, head over, fall in love and take the stinger hard.As we all know some end up as a stain on the parking lot of a Pataya condo.

Have fun Scamp, but keep your wits about you. Mbkudu.

[falong]

100 Pounds to last to the end of the month and youre guzzling down heinekens?

Explain

[mbkudu]

Scamp, I can't help but to imagine you as a scientist peering over a petri dish,

poking at the little organism, your relationship on the forum, with a pair of tweezers. You poke it, prod it and carefully note your observations in your journal.

Is this normal? Maybe it is. Maybe there are lots of 'scientists' who show all to the world through the internet. I must admit, however, that it is an interesting science experiment indeed.

[Coffee Dude]

If all you are putting on the line here for a possible win of a lifetime of happiness and bliss is the possibilty of returning to the life you had before, what do you have to lose?

Having said that, at this point, I don't think it would be a good idea to make her the beneficiary on your life insurance policy.

Coffee!!!

[The Gentleman Scamp]

Firstly, we have enough money until the end of the week and we had earned a nice night out - besides, it was her money to spend - or her fathers I should say.

She has no interest in getting married (not that I'm anywhere near that road yet) but in general conversation she states that she just wants to be with somebody and have children at some point - this doesn't seem normal but maybe it's a good thing for me financially.

She doesn't seem in a hurry to go to the U.K. either since here dad will visit here next year. I wouldn't read too much into the whole drugs thing, she's wised up to that and she's seen what drugs have done to some of her ex colleagues and her mentioning us having a sniff together one day is something that is done every weekend by many people I know of back home. I on the other hand am not anti drugs, but have always found people who take them on a regular basis to be quite boring, fake and so heavily influenced by the in crowd that it's rather sad.

To put it in a nutshell - my least favourite Thai experience and one I will not be having again is the Full Moon Party. I think it's a melting pot for hardcore druggies and young ######wits who show their appreciation of Thailand by littering the beach and urinating into the sea.

I don't mind who reads my postings - I'm a good seed but that doesn't mean I'm a virginal innocent who's blinkered to what goes on.

Thanks Nacharon for the writing compliment - I do enjoy writing and have been in need of a 'creative outlet' since I packed up my Yamaha keyboard and put it in my mum's loft back home.

She's been a party girl, I've been a playboy and not far under the skin we're just two good people who have been waiting for each other and want a nice, normal life with a house and a dog.

Woof.

I would actually prefer a cat.

[davethailand]

Quote Gentleman Scamp

To put it in a nutshell - my least favourite Thai experience and one I will not be having again is the Full Moon Party. I think it's a melting pot for hardcore druggies and young ######wits who show their appreciation of

Thailand by littering the beach and urinating into the sea.

I agree 100%,

Fcukwits

[Wolfie]

I like the full moon parties...

all the jerks p**s off to a part of thailand i'm not in.

Magic

[The Gentleman Scamp]

She likes the odd sniff of cocaine and want's to do it with me sometime, preferably when and if we go to the U.K. she says, which would be next year.

Well if this is being read by the UK Embassy i am sure you will have no problem getting a Visa then.

I was going to go buy a story book to read today but this message at thaivisa is much better so thank you Mr Scamp for saving me some Baht.

Just in case you miss.....you are happy for this girl to introduce you to illegal drugs

I should really take care when vaguely repeating conversations.

I know which of her comments to take seriously and which not to. She often jokes that she hates me which she possibly would if I ever did get into the same habits as her ex and put up my nose the same stuff that turned him into an unfaithful and arrogant bastard who damaged her confidence.

When I typed that she 'likes the odd sniff' I made it sound present tense as if it's still a habit, whereas the fact is that she DID enjoy her ex boyfriend's freebies and the experience of coke was one she would have liked to share with me had I known her back then, though had I known her back then we would be getting pissed together, not doing coke.

I used to enjoy being single but now life has changed it's not something I would like to go back to.

She has no desire to visit any discotheques these days either or do any of the party stuff and if she ever did present me with some white powder, I would be less than impressed not to mention surprised. She talks more about being together, going to the beach, and buying curtains which is what she romances about with me these days.

Like most things in her past, it's behind her and not something she would go looking for, and I say this with confidence based on conversations we've had.

She would not inroduce me to coke or anything of the sort, the only reason she has ever taken drugs in the past is because she was influenced by people - NOT come to think of it other bargirls as she didn't get into yabba but the whole cocaine thing was introduced to her by her cool, DJ boyfriend who was obviously her influence as she hasn't done it since they split and often refers to him as a man with more money than brain and that it's a waste of money.

This is a girl who nowadays nags me if I want to drink a whiskey and coke on a sunday afternoon saying that I shouldn't drink too early.

I am not a drug user and other than L&M Menthol I have only introduced her to what it feels like to be appreciated for all her positive and 'real' qualities of which she has many. I don't assume to know you CuteThaiGial but she is from a poor family and is maybe less privaliged than yourself.

I will speak to the nice lady I know at the embassy if we ever do plan a visit to the U.K. and I will be completely honest about our relationship and her past.

From my experience embassy's appreciate honesty and if she didn't get granted a visa then so be it, it just goes to show that being a good person counts for <deleted>*K ALL if you've have had a tainted past and that life just isn't fair sometimes.

[ThaiPauly]

Be careful Scamp, honesty is not ALWAYS the best policy here in the LOS.

Anyway, first thing to do is get her a regular job, it will be important that her "Bank Book" shows that she has a regular monthly income.

They are prone to refuse those without full time occupation as there is NO incentive for them to return after their "Holiday" She will have to prove she has been in employment for at least 6 months.

TP

[The Gentleman Scamp]

Be careful Scamp, honesty is not ALWAYS the best policy here in the LOS.

Anyway, first thing to do is get her a regular job, it will be important that her "Bank Book" shows that she has a regular monthly income.

They are prone to refuse those without full time occupation as there is NO incentive for them to return after their "Holiday" She will have to prove she has been in employment for at least 6 months.

TP

She's out looking now if she isn't still scrubbing Mirinda out of the carpet.

Like I said, she's not that bothered right now about going to the U.K. and is so used to being unfairly judged by her past that I doubt she'd want to go through the hassle.

She knows she's a good person and I now know it and a job is something she wants for her, just to occupy her time and make some proper and decent friends.

What Thaivisa.com thinks of her is important to her because she knows it's important to me, that and the fact that she's met 12Call and Splitlid and likes them both because they have been good friends to me in the short time I've known them.

I love her for that.

Going to England? ...We'll cross that bridge when and if we come to it.

As for marraige, could this be the first Thai girl who has no interest in it and could the fact that she has a Thai stepdad she dislikes and an Irish stepmum she adores but rarely sees have anything to do with it?

[sleir]

i love the full moon parties.

they are soo ridiculous , i can't stop laughing when i think about the one i've been to. got terribly wasted on whatever i could take/drink in the shortest time possible, talked with lots of people whom i didn't understand anymore, danced on the beach to silly techno tunes, passed out for 2 hours.

woke up in the sand without shirt, shoes, money, just with my shorts. noticed that the party was still going on, some couple <deleted> next to me. walked about 10 meters, found my thai gf looking for me with some friends of hers and my travelling mate. partied on for a few hours with all the other <deleted>, gf tried to convince me to drink water, preferred whiskey coke. even let some gay fella fingerpaint me with some glow in the dark color..

finally at 6-7 o' clock i went on my boat to samui, fed the fishes with the contents of my stomach and drove home in heavy rainfall half naked, with a big smile on my face, well aware of what an idiot i am

heck, if you're just a weeee stupid or like to watch silly people... there ain't any better parties on earth.

sry for the off-topic

[Darlek]

After almost three years in Thailand I have never fallen in love or loved a girl as more than a friend, until now that is.

.

the fact that she is prone to sulks is worrying , and mood swings too.

mind you dont get burned ...is my advice