An Ugly Australian In Thailand?

[asiancup2007]

Elephant men on the rampage

By simone Heng

OVER the Chinese New Year holidays, I went to Bangkok and took part in an elephant ride.

I was overjoyed at the prospect of riding an elephant alone, but the Thai 'beastmaster' barked: 'Miss, two people to an elephant.'

It seemed there were some logistical hitches to being single, so the 'beastmaster' brought me another 'elephant'. Except this one was a 200kg white man in his 60s with sweat patches beneath his armpits and skin so sun-damaged it resembled the 'it' bag.

You can just imagine the seat on top of the elephant tipping at one end like the sinking scene in Titanic. The sadistic see-saw was pushing my head up into foliage and Mr Sweaty was sitting comfortably with his arms behind me.

I could feel the burning stares of other elephant riders who probably thought I had been 'purchased' from the streets of Pattaya.

'Where are you from, love?' the senior citizen asked me while spraying me with his sweat.

'I'm Australian, from Perth. But I'm based in Singapore,' I answered.

'What a coincidence! I'm from Brisbane,' he breathed on me.

'Wow, Brisbane! Isn't that Pauline Hanson country?' I asked.

ASIANNESS

(For those unacquainted with Pauline Hanson, the flame-haired politician became famous for describing Australia as being 'swamped with Asians' who 'have their own culture and religion, form ghettos and do not assimilate'.)

'I have a lot of time for Pauline. She's a great lady,' he said, like he was ordering French fries. 'They ousted her because she was speaking the truth.'

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. I gripped my sunglasses, as they were the only means of disguising my 'Asianness' from the hideous Hanson sympathiser. If Mr Sweaty discovered I was Asian, he may try to squash me to death with his weight and prevent my return to Australia.

How did a debate on Australian politics begin in the Thai bushlands on my only four days off from work?

'So, it's OK for you to come to Thailand and do business with Asians but you just don't want them in Australia?' I asked.

'No, no. I like Asians. I have a mate who married a Thai girl and lives here with her,' he replied.

'Really?' I said, feigning surprise. How original. He must be the only Australian to ever do that!

The whole 'elephant man' saga convinced me that my new-found singledom may be a lot like the fake Tiffany's jewellery I bought in Patpong. It starts off beautifully but, pretty quickly, it tarnishes, revealing its flaws.

Maybe a less-than-perfect plus one is all a girl needs to protect her from the real elephant men out there!

http://newpaper.asia1.com.sg/show/story/0,...,156523,00.html

-------------------------------------------------

I Googled "thailand" in Goolge news today and this article came up from the depths. Is it just me? or

is this not a most odious piece of writing?. The mind boogles if the boot was on the other foot. In my experience it isn't a crime to be over 60, overweight, friendly, have sun damaged skin, have a friend who has married a Thai, to perspire and to to like Asians. All this from a Pauline Hanson admirer.

I've seen the word Troll mentioned on this site alot but I think this exchange takes the cake.

"How did a debate on Australian politics begin in the Thai bushlands on my only four days off from work?"

Maybe this had something to do with it?

"Wow, Brisbane! Isn't that Pauline Hanson country?' I asked"

" wow Singapore! Doesn't that have the Internal Security Act (ISA) which allows the Government to arbitrarily arrest citizens and detain them without trial"[/font]

Yes some debate. The poor guy never stood a chance as he was up against "the world's tiniest media machine." Self described I'm guessing, there's more vomit inducing dribble like that on Simone Hengs website simoneheng.com where she doesn't hide her light under a bushell.

Talking about her Arts degree Simone informs us, "The degree convinced me that I was actually a great writer and it was these writing skills which sustained me while establishing myself in the Asian entertainment scene." So I must be mistaken. A great writer wouldn't err it must be a piece of brillant self satire, the ugly australian abroad. Take a bow. Barry Humphries get ready to pass the baton.

For the record I do not share the views of Pauline Hanson.

Edited February 18, 2008 by Totster
Removed formatting so easier to read

[kankaroo]

Wow ! nothing like a strong 'western' woman to put the fun into travel in Asia. Pity you were not allowed to own that particular elephant for yourself on that occasion. Mind you, I was forced to share a taxi with an Aussie girl in Cambodia once. After I had shared half my food and water with her, she proceeded to bang on about how 'limeys weren't welcome' in her native country etc etc blah blah, so I can relate to your situation in a way.

Mind you that old guy sounded pretty rude by opening a conversation with : 'Where are you from, love?' THE BLOODY cheek of him! Where I come from that is called being friendly. Oh well....

Did it ever occur to you that he possibly wanted his own elephant and not be stuck beside you?

Bah !

[naka]

Simone should protest by handing back her Aussie passport.

Naka.

[donna]

please allow me to point out that not ALL australian women think along these lines. i do find some comments in her article particularly offensive towards men.

[TheDon]

please allow me to point out that not ALL australian women think along these lines. i do find some comments in her article particularly offensive towards men.

But alot do, I see it all the time in Australia

[Etrigan]

'Where are you from, love?' the senior citizen asked me while spraying me with his sweat.

It is reassuring to see that respect for one's elders is still taught to Ozzy youth.

What a vile article from an equally vile author.

[kingwilly]

'Where are you from, love?' the senior citizen asked me while spraying me with his sweat.

It is reassuring to see that respect for one's elders is still taught to Ozzy youth.

What a vile article from an equally vile author.

she experienced a less than pleasant experience, that doesnt make her vile!

[njpski]

As an Australian and, I hope, a fair one, I abhor the racism of Pauline Hanson and her troglodyte followers.

But Australia is not immune from racists among its population. We can all cite instances of racist behaviour from other countries, but that never excuses such attitudes.

[Scott]

When stuck on an elephant alone with someone, it might be a good idea to avoid certain subjects like:

--what do you think of Thaksin?

--Aren't you glad the new Visa rules are getting rid of the riff-raff?

--Don't you think global warming is just a bunch of poppy-cock?

--Oh, Pauline Hansen territory?

etc. etc. etc.

[TheDon]

Pauline Hanson was nothing but a tool.

She said she is not racist but hates aborginals, says there is an asian invasion.

She wanted to tax the country only $2.00 a week from your pay in her election campaign.

I just dont understand channel 7 last year had her on a few times news saying muslims should all go back to where they come from etc etc just after channel 7 did a story on muslims.

I mean majority of the people in the country love her, but there the rednecks. I know she is popular in QLD.

[WeekendWarrior]

So its ok for you to think country people ar idiots but its not ok for Hanson to dislike muslims and abo's and whoever else she has a bee in her bonnet for right ??

I think she is cool, only person to ever stand up and tell it as it is. If she aint got balls she should have.

[Payboy]

Simone should protest by handing back her Aussie passport.

Naka.

[TheDon]

So its ok for you to think country people ar idiots but its not ok for Hanson to dislike muslims and abo's and whoever else she has a bee in her bonnet for right ??

I think she is cool, only person to ever stand up and tell it as it is. If she aint got balls she should have.

I never said all country people are idiots.

Hanson does have some good points but she goes way over the top on her topics. Like with asians, she said asian people all come here and sell drugs and are in gangs (from her early days). Any idiot knows she is a racist by the length and details she goes into regarding races, she also has been caught out a few times too.

Sadly alot of her supporters are racist too and follow her because they share the same views that Australia should only bring white people in the country

[njpski]

A gun-toting, sour-faced, Hanson supporter is a really scary concept - country folk are not idiots as a group - just some of them, just like the urban white supremacists that he like of hanson encourages.

[Boo]

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. I gripped my sunglasses, as they were the only means of disguising my 'Asianness' from the hideous Hanson sympathiser. If Mr Sweaty discovered I was Asian, he may try to squash me to death with his weight and prevent my return to Australia.

From reading this it would seem this girl was asian but with western upbringing. So lets try not to start in on the western women ranting please.

[kingwilly]

From reading this it would seem this girl was asian but with western upbringing.

erm, no kidding....

[BigSnake]

maybe you will meet again, be prepare this time.

[kankaroo]

From reading this it would seem this girl was asian but with western upbringing.

erm, no kidding....

[Boo]

point being, maybe she didn't like this bloke going on about too many asians in australia when she is one. Seems to me it was the main point of her article but maybe we are reading different things

[Gravelrash]

point being, maybe she didn't like this bloke going on about too many asians in australia when she is one. Seems to me it was the main point of her article but maybe we are reading different things

Seems I am missing the "main point" you allude to. Where did he say there were too many Asians in Australia? She also whines about how she ended up in a political conversation whereas she was the one that instigated it. Being Australian she would know darn well that Pauline Hanson is an irrelevant spent force that few take seriously. Everywhere has it's rednecks, but her views were rejected by the vast majority. Also some liked her nationalistic views but wouldn't support her racism. As a previous poster said if you don't want controvery then why raise those topics?

Nor did he insult her. As to her opening comment - "a 200kg white man in his 60s with sweat patches beneath his armpits and skin so sun-damaged it resembled the 'it' bag". Seems clear who has the prejudice issues. I have no idea what you were reading.

[LaoKao]

Well, to my mind she was just referring to that fact that he liked a politician, but that doesn't neccesarily mean he agrees with all her comments. Also, anyone can write a story and express an opinion, but the nasty way she chose to deliver her stroy makes her no better than this Pauline lady.

In fact, this story is like one that might (on a bad week) get published in something like Womans Digest or similar, and if really lucky they may also print a big gold star announcing that the author had won a ₤10 gift voucher to spend at BHS for their stirling effort.

[kankaroo]

point being, maybe she didn't like this bloke going on about too many asians in australia when she is one. Seems to me it was the main point of her article but maybe we are reading different things

He opened the conversation with : 'Where are you from, love?'

She replied : 'I'm Australian, from Perth. But I'm based in Singapore,'

He said : 'What a coincidence! I'm from Brisbane,'

And finally she started the problem with........ : 'Wow, Brisbane! Isn't that Pauline Hanson country?'

The old guy was exchanging polite small talk, she started with the politics.

[Lancelot]

Elephant men on the rampage

By simone Heng

OVER the Chinese New Year holidays, I went to Bangkok and took part in an elephant ride.

I was overjoyed at the prospect of riding an elephant alone, but the Thai 'beastmaster' barked: 'Miss, two people to an elephant.'

It seemed there were some logistical hitches to being single, so the 'beastmaster' brought me another 'elephant'. Except this one was a 200kg white man in his 60s with sweat patches beneath his armpits and skin so sun-damaged it resembled the 'it' bag.

You can just imagine the seat on top of the elephant tipping at one end like the sinking scene in Titanic. The sadistic see-saw was pushing my head up into foliage and Mr Sweaty was sitting comfortably with his arms behind me.

I could feel the burning stares of other elephant riders who probably thought I had been 'purchased' from the streets of Pattaya...

My take on this is that she simply did not like the guy from the git go and she has an acid tounged personality ("beastmaster" reference. Was that guy asian too?!?)

Edited February 18, 2008 by Lancelot

[Khutan]

Well, to my mind she was just referring to that fact that he liked a politician

Like in this story http://www.smh.com.au/news/national/i-did-...4152882290.html

Thank you Sydney Morning Herald

[samran]

she definetly came off as a bit of a high maintence princess in this article. And I am not a Pauline Hanson fan.

People like her fail to realise that while Hanson was a racist many of her supporters weren't. They were simply scared of the economic realities of a new millenium, and hoped that someone would take them back to that golden age. In that sense, Hanson was a false prophet.

My grandmother liked Hanson for the most bizzare of reasons - the fact that she wore 'nice dresses'. Not that she agreeded with any of her views, but you can't say hanson didn't resonate with certain (and diverse) sections of the Australian public.

[wamberal]

Hanson came to the fore at the end of the last Labor government in Australia. She spoke for a significant minority of people who felt that the pendulum had swung too far towards the left-liberal side on cultural issues. A lot of people appreciated her guts and her honesty, as well as the fact that she was obviously the product of lower socio-economic upbringing, no tertiary education, etc.

And Australia, particularly in some of the big cities, was going through an important demographic change, with a big increase in Asian immigration.

It used to be the Irish, then after the Second War, it was the Italians, Greeks, and other "reffos", then it was the Lebanese, finally it was the Asians. Each successive wave of immigration caused ripples on the surface of what used to be a fairly homogenous society.

Some Australians still feel that there is too much immigration, but the level of ignorant prejudice is subsiding, as it always does in any civilised society.

I have lived for long periods in several places, including Thailand and Hong Kong, and there is no doubt that Australia is a very civilised country, with a population which is mostly caring and welcoming - for all its faults and failings, Aussies do have a conscience, do care for the underdog, and most will help their neighbour when they need help.

A friend of mine whom I met in Hong Kong (Chinese, but had Canadian residency) came to Australia for a look around, was so impressed at the levels of generosity and hospitality that she and her son experienced, that they decided to emigrate here rather than to Canada, even though it meant considerable paperwork, and a long delay.

[naka]

point being, maybe she didn't like this bloke going on about too many asians in australia when she is one. Seems to me it was the main point of her article but maybe we are reading different things

Seems I am missing the "main point" you allude to. Where did he say there were too many Asians in Australia? She also whines about how she ended up in a political conversation whereas she was the one that instigated it. Being Australian she would know darn well that Pauline Hanson is an irrelevant spent force that few take seriously. Everywhere has it's rednecks, but her views were rejected by the vast majority. Also some liked her nationalistic views but wouldn't support her racism. As a previous poster said if you don't want controvery then why raise those topics?

Nor did he insult her. As to her opening comment - "a 200kg white man in his 60s with sweat patches beneath his armpits and skin so sun-damaged it resembled the 'it' bag". Seems clear who has the prejudice issues. I have no idea what you were reading.

Indeed, that's the way I read it too.

Naka.

[dr_Pat_Pong]

A gun-toting, sour-faced, Hanson supporter is a really scary concept - country folk are not idiots as a group - just some of them, just like the urban white supremacists that he like of hanson encourages.

She was firmly trounced in the last elction. Thank God.

[david96]

A gun-toting, sour-faced, Hanson supporter is a really scary concept - country folk are not idiots as a group - just some of them, just like the urban white supremacists that he like of hanson encourages.

She was firmly trounced in the last elction. Thank God.

And she was also convicted earlier of electoral fraud and served some time in a corrective institution in Brisbane but was released after about 3 months, she could have got 10 years max, money was behind it all as far as she was concerned.

The conviction was overturned for "political reasons" by a certain ALP premier in Qld.

She was also known as "Pauline Pantsdown" by certain quarters of the media. She had all the characteristics of a streetwalker. Her favourite words were "please explain".

Edited February 19, 2008 by david96

[Chang_paarp]

she definetly came off as a bit of a high maintence princess in this article. And I am not a Pauline Hanson fan.

People like her fail to realise that while Hanson was a racist many of her supporters weren't. They were simply scared of the economic realities of a new millenium, and hoped that someone would take them back to that golden age. In that sense, Hanson was a false prophet.

My grandmother liked Hanson for the most bizzare of reasons - the fact that she wore 'nice dresses'. Not that she agreeded with any of her views, but you can't say hanson didn't resonate with certain (and diverse) sections of the Australian public.

Your grandmother isn't Thai is she? That is the same reasoning I heard for selecting a politician to vote for here. Maybe that could explain the current fiasco of a government.