Seven Years With A Thai Girl Livein

[Samuian]

Prostitutes are for having fun with......not marrying

Well, well, well, not all of "them" are really "Bar-Girlz" or Pros', neither easily identifiable as such.... next time I will consult you and the others, "who know it all", first to give "the chosen one" a thorough check up!

They're easily identifiable as such when they ask for money for sex

Well, different people, different experiences, different opinions... not all are "flat out" and so simple to detect like this, some come in pretty well arranged camouflage!

Is a difference between beginner, advanced and top-pro!

[Westerner]

Prostitutes are for having fun with......not marrying

Well, well, well, not all of "them" are really "Bar-Girlz" or Pros', neither easily identifiable as such.... next time I will consult you and the others, "who know it all", first to give "the chosen one" a thorough check up!

They're easily identifiable as such when they ask for money for sex

Well, different people, different experiences, different opinions... not all are "flat out" and so simple to detect like this, some come in pretty well arranged camouflage!

Is a difference between beginner, advanced and top-pro!

Mai kowjai

[MidoriApple]

.... your lesson-learned,

it is one kind of good experience, actually....learn from mistake....

I really love the idea of that twist and u-turn in the judgement of Larrys demise, can't really see which mistake HE made! ...

Is it "Thai-Logic", or am I just missing the point here?

Since my divorce from my thai wife, I went to the sacred mountain and received a commandment I stick very strictly to:

"temporary relationsships only, without ANY commitment!"

Since I live a better, happier life in personal freedom ... it's easy, but most have the tendency to make themselves a depended love-slave... if anyone sits back and thinks about what one has to "invest", to get what in return?

What I learned over the many years of me staying in this Country is that if she agrees to "american share", has her own place to stay, her own income, buys me the first gift, I may consider a extended temporary relationship! I even would go as far as: buys ME a house, buys ME a car, buys ME Gold and Diamonds, a new mobile phone every couple of months, takes ME on trips overseas... I would maybe consider to marry again!

Everything else will turn out to be a disaster, so why start something like this in the first place?

Well, this is for Samuian, whilst you questioned me couple things.

Nothing more for OP, I always wish you well.

WHAT WAS HIS MISTAKE?

In my idea, I considered this situation as a kind of business, not the family issue.

They are partners, OP didn't mention anything about love & caring.

No matter how long they had got together, No one can't be completely relied on.

This is so common in doing business.

OP had put most of the material things under her name, so these supposed to be "her belongings"

What he did wrong were he put things on her name himself and also he had guarded down.

So, I didn't think he had the right to take material-things back when they decided to quit their partnerships.

What if this to be about love,

It is so ordinary to give material-things to the spouse, what you give is "to give", not "to lend"

So, this is the same, they are her belongings.

Who's to blame? I think OP himself, he was too naive.

IS IT THAI-LOGIC?

No, I don't think so. It is just my own meditation.

Til now, I am 30-something, I did so many mistakes in my life.

What if I kept desperate still, I guess I might commit suicide myself for long.

I am sentitive, but I realize that no point to look back and still with that mistake whilst I can't fix up any yesterday.

Any one can do mistake, just take the advantage out from each situation, no matter how good or bad of it.

I think this is so ordinary thinking as a human.

I don't want OP to think stereotype, what I need is OP should let it go and begins life again with more carefully and more strength.

Also I do appreciate that OP told this to warn us. He doesn't want anybody get this suffering as him.

Samuian, with respectfully, I also wish you well.

As read from your replies that you've got load of relationships, I feel like you feel bitter living your life.

I myself, 11years relationship with my BF, I've got nothing from him..house, car, diamond, mobile, LV...I have them on my own.

Sometimes I got gifts, but he got tehm as well.

For me, love is love, nothing about money.

So, please stay positive and always keep strength to get through all your matters.

Cheers!!

[mikethevigoman]

Heres another lesson learnt ,.deja vu im afraid, these stories used to have some interest but like another shooting/suicide in Pattaya its just in a days news im afraid,. NEXT !..Ps, yes i do feel sorry for the guy,.But it wont help,.

[mikethevigoman]

Prostitutes are for having fun with......not marrying

Well, well, well, not all of "them" are really "Bar-Girlz" or Pros', neither easily identifiable as such.... next time I will consult you and the others, "who know it all", first to give "the chosen one" a thorough check up!

They're easily identifiable as such when they ask for money for sex

My uncle lives in his own condo in his name, has a car in his name, if a woman starts talking money to him he says nooo problem, you can work as many hours as you like and sent it all home to mama, i have enough,thankyou,.

[Samuian]

Samuian, with respectfully, I also wish you well.

As read from your replies that you've got load of relationships, I feel like you feel bitter living your life.

I myself, 11years relationship with my BF, I've got nothing from him..house, car, diamond, mobile, LV...I have them on my own.

Sometimes I got gifts, but he got tehm as well.

For me, love is love, nothing about money.

So, please stay positive and always keep strength to get through all your matters.

Cheers!!

About bitterness, you got me wrong, that is for granted... life experience of 4 decades and a bit more... may read/sound like it but I never ever thought a single second about "jumping the fence"... it's a material world... still don't believe that "he did anything wrong", as the legal side states: "he got robbed, cheated"...

remember: "money can't buy me lo-ooove...!?

Thanks! Will stay "strong"...know what and who I am... and stick to that!

[mikethevigoman]

I feel really lucky after reading some of your stories

But is it luck, or selection ?,. i think if you enter a relationship thinking about how to secure your belongings it can only be a slippery slope downwards cant it ? .....never had any of my western wives/girlfriends OR my current Thai wife try to deceive me out of anything, . , im not trying to be clever ,but is it luck ?.

[phutoie2]

To the OP dude, really, you could have gotten taken by a hoe like that from ANY country with the state of mind you were in. Don't go around saying trash like "Oh no one is safe with a Thai woman in any relationship" just because your a looser.

Yes and your posts would have more impact/make sense if you have some understanding of the English language.

'Teams lose, Lose one's heart, lose touch with reality!

Loose - too many examples, to write here.

Hmmm maybe keyboard error!

[mikethevigoman]

well another sad story.

The bit that caught my eye was the OP,s comment re not giving someone 8k a month when they are not having sex?

What was she? Profession I mean. I think that was an insult.

Maybe got what he deserved. treated her like one and she acted like one!

I think I posted before. I did give her 8K a month. For her use and to spend as she liked and help her obligations. It was not for sex. She did have her own life and she needed money of her own.

Can i ask ,did she work ? .if not why not ?

[Spee]

I have a pal who changes his women every 3 months or so.

Interviewer: Why do you spend so much money on prostitutes?

Charlie Sheen: I don't pay them for sex. I pay them to leave.

[MidoriApple]

Samuian, with respectfully, I also wish you well.

As read from your replies that you've got load of relationships, I feel like you feel bitter living your life.

I myself, 11years relationship with my BF, I've got nothing from him..house, car, diamond, mobile, LV...I have them on my own.

Sometimes I got gifts, but he got tehm as well.

For me, love is love, nothing about money.

So, please stay positive and always keep strength to get through all your matters.

Cheers!!

About bitterness, you got me wrong, that is for granted... life experience of 4 decades and a bit more... may read/sound like it but I never ever thought a single second about "jumping the fence"... it's a material world... still don't believe that "he did anything wrong", as the legal side states: "he got robbed, cheated"...

remember: "money can't buy me lo-ooove...!?

Thanks! Will stay "strong"...know what and who I am... and stick to that!

Well, that's my pleasure.

Happy to know you are happy as well

[stress]

this shit will happen, you probably knew it when you s???? with her.

Edited May 7, 2008 by stress

[Larryst]

well another sad story.

The bit that caught my eye was the OP,s comment re not giving someone 8k a month when they are not having sex?

What was she? Profession I mean. I think that was an insult.

Maybe got what he deserved. treated her like one and she acted like one!

I think I posted before. I did give her 8K a month. For her use and to spend as she liked and help her obligations. It was not for sex. She did have her own life and she needed money of her own.

Can i ask ,did she work ? .if not why not ?

She did work before at a bar (told to do work there by her mom). But, after 7 years you would think a person would want to get out of it and move forward. Start a new life and a better future. Instead of moving back. But the influence of the mom is too much to disregard. Some members have questioned if I loved her. The answer is "YES". I would have done anything for her. If I didn't. I wouldn't have moved up to a village (Nakon Nowhere) where there is nothing there for farangs. I moved there to be with her forever, make her happy and a good life.

Edited May 8, 2008 by Larryst

[Heng]

The "my parents made me do it" excuse is one of the more common ways these gals try to save face (what little is left). It's a close cousin to the "that subprime lender made me take out a loan I couldn't afford" or "that Toyota dealer made us by the new Hilux Vigo." THAT's why I'm working here... as a casier only of course.

[jayjayjayjay]

A few years back I bumped into an Australian in Lampang, & over some beers he told me that there are only 2 types of Thai women, bad ones and very bad ones. If you pick a bad un you may have a chance of success over here!

Once they have the land/house/car/gold & money in the bank you are suddenly surplus to requirements. It may take some years but will happen!

...edit...

So here is an interesting one. I've decide to buy a car........ yes for the TG. So, here's how I run the deal. I pay the minimum deposit of 100k, I have payments for 60 months on the best interest rate I can. The car is in my companies name, and she get full use of the car. I have promised the car is her's and will transfer it to her at the end of the payment period, however, for the next five years the car is in my company name, if she doesnt help me with running my kids around (a nightmare with two young teens), if she decides she likes someone else(ie f....ks around) or whatever, that car is going to be sold......... I really have no problem if she walks away one day after the final payment is made. Relationships come and go, by that stage we would have been together for 8 years. In the mean time, she's not getting land or a house or gold.......

I can't understand why farangs fly into the country, throw down 50k in any currency and wonder why the locals have there hands out for more! Don't put anything in your TGirlfriends name that you are not giving her or her family.......

[rick75]

Its not the family its the girl, the bar scene offers excitement, cheap thrills and easy money.

There is a saying "you can take the girl out of the country but you can't take the country out of the girl", I would say substitute bar for country and you are near the truth.

[jayjayjayjay]

To Larryst.

I had a similar problem regarding property and real estate, not with a girlfriend or wife, but a Farang Partner and his Thai wife.

..Edits

Please keep us informed of your progress and good luck.

My Thai Wife is currently building a house for her mother. Her father has taken to selling the building materials before the house can be finished. It is not his land. We are both out of Thailand and will not be back to December. My Wifes Brother is on his way to the village to try to put a stop to it.

Does anyone think the Thai police would get involved?

I assume your TG is paying for this house out of her own money. I wonder why a fellow Aussie would build a house for someone in Thailand. Would you do the same for a girlfriend from Bundaberg, or Tennant Creek. Explain this too me pls!

Edited May 8, 2008 by jayjayjayjay

[jayjayjayjay]

Just something I thought I'd mention:

Before starting on things like purchasing a vehicle/house etc., or having a house built, it would be prudent to read up on the laws involved beforehand. Not doing so is careless and asking for trouble; especially in Thailand, where the law seems to only apply selectively.

I've studied Thai law though, and your situation is somewhat confusing. According to Thai law, while the house in the second case is indeed hers, anything that is not nailed to the floor is yours, if you can prove it. (This is assuming you weren't married.) Only immovable property would default to your TG's ownership.

If you were interested in pursuing the issue, you could've brought her to court over it, I'm pretty sure.

Sorry but I don't think you have studied Thai law. Larryst still has the oportunity to prove he built the house, under Thai Law the land can be her's and the house his, he can therefor do what he likes with the house as per an earlier post..... check your facts ......... not only the un-nailed bits as you mention!

[JimsKnight]

You say that you had the 1st house in a corporation why not the 2nd.

Why was the car not in your or company name?

Ok I can understand the household bits and pieces but stuff me mate, if you had been coming to LOS for this long why did you let your guard down?

I hope many read this and see the pitfalls and have the right protection in place.

Ho Hum our lower brain does get us in to bothers.

Yes the 1st house was in the corporation. I wanted to make sure things were going fine. After awhile things were going great. So I thought we had a good relationship. That's why I thought it would help things more to move right by her village (big mistake). The influence of her family and especially her mom (greedy Bi-ch) it was too much of a influence.

The car was a 2nd hand vehicle and it seemed too hard to transfer it into the corporation or my name. One good thing is. The engine overheated and the engine block was cracked.

After 7 years. I thought things were going great and I didn't need any protection. My mistake again. But, with her mom telling my girl to finish me (her cousins & nieces told me) I had no choice. Mom's influence takes precedent over anything.

You hit it right on the nail. My lower brain took over common sense.

Unlucky mate, you should of taken heed and never even left your condo.

I've often said that the best girls in Thailand are orphans who won't have some shadowy family member hammering them for cash every 5 minutes.

[Trevor]

A few years back I bumped into an Australian in Lampang, & over some beers he told me that there are only 2 types of Thai women, bad ones and very bad ones. If you pick a bad un you may have a chance of success over here!

Once they have the land/house/car/gold & money in the bank you are suddenly surplus to requirements. It may take some years but will happen!

Another guy said he trades them in for a new model every 3 months. Well, unless you're a family man, this is absolutely the best policy: be flexible and mobile. Don't let them get their talons in, pay the bare minimum to keep their company, don't give in to venal relatives, and move on when bored. And they can become sooo boring ...

As in any country the best girls get snapped up very quickly by the local men, and especially the local wealthy men. Farang don't stand much of a chance. For those serious about a long-term relationship and family, there are much better pickings in South-East Asia than the Thai pooyings. Indonesia, Malaysia, Singapore and the Philippines all speak better English and the educational levels are higher. Leave the attitude-ridden hyper Thai barbie dolls to the sex tourists!

[Pepe']

A few years back I bumped into an Australian in Lampang, & over some beers he told me that there are only 2 types of Thai women, bad ones and very bad ones. If you pick a bad un you may have a chance of success over here!

Once they have the land/house/car/gold & money in the bank you are suddenly surplus to requirements. It may take some years but will happen!

Another guy said he trades them in for a new model every 3 months. Well, unless you're a family man, this is absolutely the best policy: be flexible and mobile. Don't let them get their talons in, pay the bare minimum to keep their company, don't give in to venal relatives, and move on when bored. And they can become sooo boring ...

As in any country the best girls get snapped up very quickly by the local men, and especially the local wealthy men. Farang don't stand much of a chance. For those serious about a long-term relationship and family, there are much better pickings in South-East Asia than the Thai pooyings. Indonesia, Malaysia, Singapore and the Philippines all speak better English and the educational levels are higher. Leave the attitude-ridden hyper Thai barbie dolls to the sex tourists!

============

"Are they cheaper by the dozen"

[aries27]

"Are they cheaper by the dozen"

again, that depends. on the quality i mean.

the regular kinds can probably be affordable by the dozen. hey, ask for a bonus, maybe a baker''s dozen, why not?

but the premium ones? probably priceless...you would be scared to ask the price...

ok, really hitting the sack now.

what interesting posts today. duh...

[Pepe']

"Are they cheaper by the dozen"

again, that depends. on the quality i mean.

the regular kinds can probably be affordable by the dozen. hey, ask for a bonus, maybe a baker''s dozen, why not?

but the premium ones? probably priceless...you would be scared to ask the price...

ok, really hitting the sack now.

what interesting posts today. duh...

============

duh, wha?

[AlexLah]

Hi Larry,

Altough your story is a sad one it could be worse.

A friend of me married a non BG some time ago, they were together for 5 years before they decide to marry.

A very traditional Thai girl so it seemed.

After they marry they buy a nice 10 Million Baht house, new car and have a baby.

About a month after the baby had seen daylight he discovers something really bad she was doing for a long time.

In the end he kicked her and the baby out.

(Believe me, any guy would have done the same).

A few weeks ago he was shot by a 9 mm while in his car.

He was lucky to survive the assasination attempt as the bullet hit his shoulder but caused severe damage.

First he did not want to believe it could be her or the family doing/arranging that.

When i heard his wife called him shortly before the assasination attempt I knew enough.

I have warned him many times even before he got engaged as I had a bad feeling about her and when I heard the stories he told me.

OK, the guy in love and did not have a lot of streetwise experience.

I live in Thailand and see this happen many many times.

The guys just do not want to believe me and either they get cleaned or end up on the pavement in a pool of blood.

Please remember, the family comes first!

[distortedlink]

The beliefs that a whore`s ambition in life is to be whisked away by some knight in shining armour, given a home and transformed into a happy go lucky domesticated housewife, is a myth. The same as having a puppy, bring it up with bad habits and they stick with the dog for life, no matter what environment one puts it, in later life.

Older guys to realize that these girls are more interested in the contents of their wallets rather than the contents of their pants.

Idiots never listen to advice or use common sense, they always learn by experience, which in some cases they never recover.

Edited May 8, 2008 by distortedlink

[qwertz]

Their stories are however good fodder for the forum, look how long this thread is running.

Nice one gentlemen, keep 'em coming, I'm your number one fan.

[aries27]

if real lives are lost or destroyed, this thread is worth it. it could save future lives and heartches for all you know. YOU NEVER KNOW...

really am amazed, blown away by many of the accounts, am sure some are really true... i could even ask, is thailand really that amazing and worth it??? i mean westerners down on their luck, doing odd jobs and visa runs like third world illegals in first world countries. really, amazing. in PH, things are way different. farangs (we call them "foreigners" plain, -- we speak good/broken english here y'know -- or if you're white, then everyone is "Americano" especially to the unexposed masses) but generally foreigners are regarded differently, some kind of first class visitors, spoiled in other words, especially if you are caucasians but even other races as well (but a little discriminatory to people with darker skin than PH people )

this is so, maybe because compared to TH, we have a very small minority of foreign residents. they are still a rarity...

as for you pepe, i knew that was a tongue-in-cheek comment and you are forgiven. but then, i also could not resist a rejoinder... fair enough?

Reason for edit: typos...

Edited May 8, 2008 by aries27

[justcruisin]

Larrys post...amazing but true,welcome to Thailand

I have been with a girl for 2 years,in Australia 6 months

Thought i was smart enough to get a girl,parents deceased at an early age

Has her own bequethed home in Udon

Safe... I buy new apartment in CM(my name).We seem to be in a trusting relationship (2yr)

We travel between 2 places,crazy man..have upkeep on 2 properties

Give her 35,000Bht for her mysterious loan shark in Udon last week,Only learned she had a loan only this year,already given 80,000 for "THE MAN",oh and comes back with a Gold Necklace 22ct,of course she won a lot on cards in 2 weeks.

Whatever the circumstances of the lady...only one thing is important...MONEY

"Caveot Emptor"

[Spee]

Larrys post...amazing but true,welcome to Thailand

While there are probably more instances than are reported here, it is important to keep perspective and realize there is also a flip side to the coin. For every bad ending, there are likely dozens and dozens of very happy couples all over the country. There are also probably equal amounts of "gold-digging" in the west and other parts of the world. Ask any girl in the west if she was going to marry someone, would she rather marry a doctor or a ditch diggger? Many will respond with they just want to be happy, but the truth is the chances of being happy are probably higher with more money available than with less. Why should Thai women be considered as being any different.

"Caveot Emptor"

Also true in every other facet of life and business in any other country in the world.

[wamberal]

There are some sad stories, and sad attitudes, here.

It is pretty obvious that those with bad and sad stories are much more likely to post them.

The rest of us, probably a substantial majority, who have happily married Thai women and are living happily ever after, are too busy enjoying life to whinge and moan about it.

Make poor choices, and you will have bad experiences. I have three farang friends locally who have been married happily to a Thai woman, for anywhere from 30 to 10 years. I do not personally know any bad examples of a mixed Thai-Australian marriage, other than what I read here.

My advice to anybody contemplating a relationship with a Thai woman is to ask yourself these questions:

1. If I were poor would she still be in this relationship?

2. Do we know enough about each other's beliefs and values to be sure that we have common goals in life?

3. Do we have friends in common, people who know us both and who are able to advise us on our suitability as a couple?

If the answer to any of these questions is "no", frankly I would hesitate.

If the answer to any of these questions is "no", and there is an age difference of more than 10 years, and/or a gap in educational achievement, I would advise against marriage, or any other serious committment, unless you can afford to lose money and the possibility of real happiness.