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"up To You" - What Is The Real Meaning


unhappyfarang

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I was once riding a scooter down a busy road in Phuket. Ahead of me, the road was temporarily blocked and a policeman was gesturing everybody approaching, to turn around, with his hand and simultaniously blowing his whistle. I rode on up to the policeman and asked him if it was possible to pass. His reply? " UP TO YOU"!

So, on I rode, weaving in and out of the burmese roadworkers then back onto the open road ahead.

How odd, I remember thinking?

So he is instructing everybody to turn around, but if approached, and asked if it is possible to pass - "UP TO YOU"!

I wonder how many other scenario's "UP TO YOU" can be used for one's advantage?

Gentleman, please shed some light..............................

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I would encourage you to consider that there might be a few Thai expressions that roughly translate to “up to you” but lack the specific nuance. For instance the American English phrase could be “it’s your life” which does mean “up to you” but carries a connotation of not taking good advice to avoid danger rather than not caring at all.

I asked the expert of everything, my Thai wife, about this and she did have an “up to you” expression "leaw tha" (already but) that suggests “up to you but be prepared to pay the price”. This is different than a standard such as “aray goah dai” which is much more easy going and not caring about the outcome. But the casual translation for each could be “up to you” but the meaning very different. She had a few more expressions in this vein.

I only say “up to you” when I mean it. God know if I express a preference the chance of having things turn out that way are at best random good luck. If I say I don’t care – well then I better be happy with whatever happens and whatever we’re eating. It is also helpful when you are 100% you will lose and your opinion matters nothing despite being asked - good to show a healthy detachment than defeat.

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Most of the time when I hear the English phrase "Up to you," it is being said by a Thai of lower social status, to a farang. I tired of that, and now often reply, "No, Mr. Thailand, it is up to you - you decide!" They seem to have difficulty then, making a group decision that affects them and the farang. I object to making decisions for other people, when they can take the responsibility.

What Thai phrase means "You decide for us, and be responsible!"?

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Most of the time when I hear the English phrase "Up to you," it is being said by a Thai of lower social status, to a farang.

It is a commonly used phrase in Thai -- laew tae khun -- indicating that the choice is yours. There really isn't any extraction of urine intended.

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Most of the time when I hear the English phrase "Up to you," it is being said by a Thai of lower social status, to a farang.

It is a commonly used phrase in Thai -- laew tae khun -- indicating that the choice is yours. There really isn't any extraction of urine intended.

I must be clear again that my source of information is the know-everything wife of "stupid farang". If we take our respective views of each other the sum of the parts doesn't represent much more than having a good time.

Disclaimer aside her feeling was laew tae khun is used when you want to imply possible bad outcomes. For instance "hi honey I'm think of going out drinking with a few guys and a bunch of girls" might get the tight liped yim mee lay-nai smile and laew tae khun meaning "That's fine up to you and if the soi dogs are eating something important to you when you wake up in searing pain; well it was really up to you."

But up to you what you think about this...

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Instead of saying 'Up To Youuuu', Taught one of my classes to say . '

Hey Diddle Diddle, the cat had a ciddle and played all over the room,

the little Dog laughed to see so much fun, and the dish ran away with the spoon'

It sounded something like this >>

Hah lickle lickle, a cat hah a pickle, an splay

all ooter ra loom.

Hicle doh raffed to seeeeee suck fan, and d** wan a whey wit poon.

They wuvved oops loved it !

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Instead of saying 'Up To Youuuu', Taught one of my classes to say . '

Hey Diddle Diddle, the cat had a ciddle and played all over the room,

the little Dog laughed to see so much fun, and the dish ran away with the spoon'

It sounded something like this >>

Hah lickle lickle, a cat hah a pickle, an splay

all ooter ra loom.

Hicle doh raffed to seeeeee suck fan, and d** wan a whey wit poon.

They wuvved oops loved it !

never heard that before.

Don't you mean - hey diddle diddle, the cat and the fiddle, the cow jumped over the moon ...... :o

Come on, teach them the correct nursery rhyme :D

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I see it as Peaceblonde sees it as a means to avoid taking responsibility for your actions. A Thai thing that I used to think was cute, but now don't.

As is often the case I seem to have very different experiences with Thais and don’t find the interaction to be all one dimensional where every use of “up to you” is an attempt to avoid responsibility. But that's just my experince. I think the same nuances that exist for me in the US in the usage of phrases like this exist here, and could connote a whole range of intentions from total disinterest, to showing deference or respect, to being polite, and yes to avoiding responsibility and more. In my day to day life and work here if I understood every use of “up to you” as a motivation to avoid responsibility it not only would I think cause me to misunderstand people but it would for me at least be a very negative lens to put on my interactions with the people around me.

For what it’s worth he’s some info the certified translator on my team gave me about this:

Mostly, we say “Laew Tae” (แล้วแต่) or “Arai Kor Dai” (อะไรก็ได้) for “Up to you” with neutral connotation.

And we say “Tam Jai Khun” (ตามใจคุณ) with a meaning of “Serve your needs” with neutral or negative senses. This is equivalent to your “It’s your life”.

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I see it as Peaceblonde sees it as a means to avoid taking responsibility for your actions. A Thai thing that I used to think was cute, but now don't.

As is often the case I seem to have very different experiences with Thais and don’t find the interaction to be all one dimensional where every use of “up to you” is an attempt to avoid responsibility. But that's just my experince. I think the same nuances that exist for me in the US in the usage of phrases like this exist here, and could connote a whole range of intentions from total disinterest, to showing deference or respect, to being polite, and yes to avoiding responsibility and more. In my day to day life and work here if I understood every use of “up to you” as a motivation to avoid responsibility it not only would I think cause me to misunderstand people but it would for me at least be a very negative lens to put on my interactions with the people around me.

For what it’s worth he’s some info the certified translator on my team gave me about this:

Mostly, we say “Laew Tae” (แล้วแต่) or “Arai Kor Dai” (อะไรก็ได้) for “Up to you” with neutral connotation.

And we say “Tam Jai Khun” (ตามใจคุณ) with a meaning of “Serve your needs” with neutral or negative senses. This is equivalent to your “It’s your life”.

This is another example of language that does not translate directly or accurately between English & Thai. There are many examples of this and it definately compounds the communication situation here.

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I was once riding a scooter down a busy road in Phuket. Ahead of me, the road was temporarily blocked and a policeman was gesturing everybody approaching, to turn around, with his hand and simultaniously blowing his whistle. I rode on up to the policeman and asked him if it was possible to pass. His reply? " UP TO YOU"!

So, on I rode, weaving in and out of the burmese roadworkers then back onto the open road ahead.

How odd, I remember thinking?

So he is instructing everybody to turn around, but if approached, and asked if it is possible to pass - "UP TO YOU"!

I wonder how many other scenario's "UP TO YOU" can be used for one's advantage?

Gentleman, please shed some light..............................

I am not a gentleman :o

Anyways;

it means: I will pat your ego by saying "up to you=take my leash" line, I know these words would either confuse your mind or would pamper your hidden desire to practice "being in charge" :D , Thus,either ways;you will eventually lose your mind and fail to take a decision for being in a trance for hearing my "up to you" line ;

THEN: I will decide for both us in the end. :D

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Most of the time when I hear the English phrase "Up to you," it is being said by a Thai of lower social status, to a farang. I tired of that, and now often reply, "No, Mr. Thailand, it is up to you - you decide!" They seem to have difficulty then, making a group decision that affects them and the farang. I object to making decisions for other people, when they can take the responsibility.

What Thai phrase means "You decide for us, and be responsible!"?

sometimes. other times it's a thai person not giving a dam_n (I can frustrate my friends at times) or it's said in english by a Thai because their vocabulary is limited.

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Instead of saying 'Up To Youuuu', Taught one of my classes to say . '

Hey Diddle Diddle, the cat had a ciddle and played all over the room,

the little Dog laughed to see so much fun, and the dish ran away with the spoon'

It sounded something like this >>

Hah lickle lickle, a cat hah a pickle, an splay

all ooter ra loom.

Hicle doh raffed to seeeeee suck fan, and d** wan a whey wit poon.

They wuvved oops loved it !

never heard that before.

Don't you mean - hey diddle diddle, the cat and the fiddle, the cow jumped over the moon ...... :o

Come on, teach them the correct nursery rhyme :D

WE did it on purpose, :-) Most knew the nursery tyme, however, I was advised later, that there are two variations. :D

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Instead of saying 'Up To Youuuu', Taught one of my classes to say . '

Hey Diddle Diddle, the cat had a ciddle and played all over the room,

the little Dog laughed to see so much fun, and the dish ran away with the spoon'

It sounded something like this >>

Hah lickle lickle, a cat hah a pickle, an splay

all ooter ra loom.

Hicle doh raffed to seeeeee suck fan, and d** wan a whey wit poon.

They wuvved oops loved it !

never heard that before.

Don't you mean - hey diddle diddle, the cat and the fiddle, the cow jumped over the moon ...... :o

Come on, teach them the correct nursery rhyme :D

Now you know why Thais cant speak good english? :D:D

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Plase be advised, Moi, now has updated Moi's pic and added a signature in Moi's Profile

:o

There is only one more thing to sort out for now and that is: 'Why, after I click on track this message, even though it is telling me, that it is being 'tracked', when I post, I no longer, get an email to my primary email address, advising me so'?

<<< Back to My Controls I presume :D >>>>>>>>>> this way, follow me please >>>>

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I've seen "up to you" used meaning: "YOU figure out what *I* want...."

And in answer to a question where the person asked doesn't want to give the answer the questioner wants to hear. I've used it this way myself; it's a good face-saver and a way to say "no" without actually saying it.

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I've seen "up to you" used meaning: "YOU figure out what *I* want...."

And in answer to a question where the person asked doesn't want to give the answer the questioner wants to hear. I've used it this way myself; it's a good face-saver and a way to say "no" without actually saying it.

Yes this is pretty much how my girlfriend uses the phrase. She means "I'm not going to lower myself to telling you whether I approve or not. Figure it yourself. And if you get it wrong you'll have to learn from your own stupid mistakes"

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I see it as Peaceblonde sees it as a means to avoid taking responsibility for your actions. A Thai thing that I used to think was cute, but now don't.

The phrase "It's up to you" was most often used by the Farang Princess when we had a long distance relationship and we were determining how much money she was needing for the month and how much I would actually send.

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Plase be advised, Moi, now has updated Moi's pic and added a signature in Moi's Profile

:o

There is only one more thing to sort out for now and that is: 'Why, after I click on track this message, even though it is telling me, that it is being 'tracked', when I post, I no longer, get an email to my primary email address, advising me so'?

<<< Back to My Controls I presume :D >>>>>>>>>> this way, follow me please >>>>

Follow me please>>>>>Humph! I Have been up and down hill, round the bends , in to my profile, my everywhere else. Everytime I leave a place of access, my answer still not known re: receiving emails saying 'there is a new posting'... I am sure Thaivisa is sending 'vibes' saying ....

'Up Toooo Youuuuu'. :D

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My mother used to use the phrase "please yourself", which meant, by its tone, "it's not what I want you to do, but I shan't stop you; proceed knowing this". It was usually enough for us to know not to proceed that way. I see "up to you" being used in this way too.

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I concur that the phrase "up-2-u" is mostly heard by thais who have had or do have a high interaction with foreigners. It does seem to be somewhat a class based comment with the lower classes; less educated, speaking it far more.

I do think it is a "responsibility avoidance" type of phrase in the usage I have heard. As a rule I have found most thais are not big on taking responsibility for their actions, as it leaves no one to blame should the outcome not be positive.

While not being the slightest bit enamored with, enchanted by or particularly endeared to this country, the alleged 'culture' or the diminutive inhabitants; I would imagine in reality; the english phrase "up-2-u" originated most likely from the sex tourist areas in the glorious "Land 'O Thais" and from there 'migrated' out to other areas and industries that shared high exposure to foreigners. I have rarely heard it in rural villages, even when speaking english with the inhabitants.

As far as using the phrase to your advantage, in financial situations were someone to say "up-2-u", I'd interpret that as meaning free. In other situations if some replied to a query of mine with "up-2-u", I'd most likely do what I wanted anyway.

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I concur that the phrase "up-2-u" is mostly heard by thais who have had or do have a high interaction with foreigners. It does seem to be somewhat a class based comment with the lower classes; less educated, speaking it far more.

I do think it is a "responsibility avoidance" type of phrase in the usage I have heard. As a rule I have found most thais are not big on taking responsibility for their actions, as it leaves no one to blame should the outcome not be positive.

While not being the slightest bit enamored with, enchanted by or particularly endeared to this country, the alleged 'culture' or the diminutive inhabitants; I would imagine in reality; the english phrase "up-2-u" originated most likely from the sex tourist areas in the glorious "Land 'O Thais" and from there 'migrated' out to other areas and industries that shared high exposure to foreigners. I have rarely heard it in rural villages, even when speaking english with the inhabitants.

As far as using the phrase to your advantage, in financial situations were someone to say "up-2-u", I'd interpret that as meaning free. In other situations if some replied to a query of mine with "up-2-u", I'd most likely do what I wanted anyway.

I would suggest that it depends on the context; for example, whether the expression is said in English by a "service provider" to a customer regarding proposed payment or activities to be performed, or if the expression is said in thai by a merchant or vendor regarding the intended use of a product or choice between products.

If you live outside the tourist areas and have occasion to converse in Thai with folks going about their day-to-day activities, you will hear the same phrase - "laew tae" - used in perhaps a different manner than the familiar "up to you" which many "service providers" have incorporated into their lexicon for assisting foreigners in the decision-making process.

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At work, where all of my team of 20+ have college degrees and most MBAs, most have traveled, many with some overseas work or study; in other words not lower classes engaged with tourists, I hear "up to you" on a regular basis . Sure I don't hear it when it's time for important decisions but lots of small things "want to meet me in my office or the pantry", "where do you want to go eat" etc. could be answered with "up to you" and most of the time it has a sense of deference and rarely avoidance of responsibility.

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Most of the time when I hear the English phrase "Up to you," it is being said by a Thai of lower social status, to a farang.

It is a commonly used phrase in Thai -- laew tae khun -- indicating that the choice is yours. There really isn't any extraction of urine intended.

This Thai phrase often connotes an element of put-down or irony... 'do as you like'... 'don't think of me!'

If the policeman said 'up to you' in English perhaps it did not accurately convey what he meant to say. It's one of those phrases that Thais sometimes know and use haphazardly without really knowing what it means... like 'Where you go?' and 'I love you'!

Andrew

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