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Posted
For a new poster you have good insights.

Personally I want to know if luxecat was having sex with this girl from the second vacation?

Non whores don't hop into bed - with anyone, Thai or falang. You are not her gik - so if sex happened you would be expected to show some appreciation.

And for an old poster, i think you've hit the nail on the head!

Determining what sort of girl you are dealing with in Thailand is actually pretty easy. It's all down to how quickly she put-out.

Don't make the mistake of coming here and applying Western values to a situation. In other words, although in the West a woman is free to have sex as and when, and with whom she pleases, without necessarily being labeled a whore, here it's not the same. Is that fair, or is that right is not important. Those are the standards that exist in Thailand.

Not that decent women don't have pre-marital sex, but not without a decent period of platonic dating. How long was it?

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Posted

To answer the op's original question....have you ever been up soi mango or the reggae pub at 10pm... ghost town's....but as soon as all the shops shut and the pharmacy's and the hairdressers (and whatever else is doing business in Chaweng), then give 30 minutes for a quick change of clothes and magically the discos fill up with sexy girls all looking for ferang's to "dance" with.

So make up your own mind where these girls come from.

HL :o

Posted
5000k, she must by retired by now then?

i am sure he meant 5000 baht, and by the way, to the original post. I have never met anyone in any country that wasnt for sale, they all have their price, lets be honest, it's just a lot less here. A Shop girl, a waitress, a secretary, a bar girl, a sales rep, everyone's just trying to make a living, and maybe meet someone nice, you cant tell me that doesnt happen in your own country, it does, if you dont know it, its because you cant afford it.

Posted

Say it with flowers :D ....that will sort the bad from the good.......flowers would be dead befor they made it back to Issan......unlike the quick ATM transfers :o

Posted
<br />To answer the op's original question....have you ever been up soi mango or the reggae pub at 10pm... ghost town's....but as soon as all the shops shut and the pharmacy's and the hairdressers (and whatever else is doing business in Chaweng), then give 30 minutes for a quick change of clothes and magically the discos fill up with sexy girls all looking for ferang's to "dance" with.<br />So make up your own mind where these girls come from.<br />HL <img src="style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":o" border="0" alt="biggrin.gif" /><br />

wrong, the girls you see in the greenmango are 99% prostitutes, the girls working in pharmacy, optical and other respectable shops, i mean not hair beauty salon for prostitutes or massage salon don't go out to those places as they have to come back to work the next day.

exeption to be made at thailand offical days off or special events like new year.

the girls coming are mainly freelances, after 1h30, the bar girls are coming and so on everydays :D

Posted

I know at least 3 REPUTABLE girls...wont say exactly where they work but you would be very suprised that go to Mango etc.....almost everyday......how do most of these shop girls on 6k-10K a month have 12k phones, motorbikes(not rented or on the drip) & a little gold...think about it....

Posted

Just enjoy thailand and not think about things too much.

she bg

she not bg

she work massage only

she sing karaoke bar

i hear this every time i frequent beer bars from farangs,it is so funny.

Posted
<br />I know at least 3 REPUTABLE girls...wont say exactly where they work but you would be very suprised that go to Mango etc.....almost everyday......how do most of these shop girls on 6k-10K a month have 12k phones, motorbikes(not rented or on the drip) & a little gold...think about it....<br />

interesting thing, i know a lot of people around samui and i like to speak to people (in thai language) when i'm going out(no matter what gender or sexual orientation) and i never met a girl that is working honestly during the day.

i don't say this doesn't exist as i know it does, you have exeptions like everywhere and for every purposes.

the "respectable" girls that i know mainly working in bkk airways, hospital or pharmacy do sometime go to the greenmango but to enjoy, their salary covering very well their expenses(around 30k/month for the two last professions)

Posted
Say it with flowers :D ....that will sort the bad from the good.......flowers would be dead befor they made it back to Issan......unlike the quick ATM transfers :o

TommyJ4 I thank you for your keen insights as well as britmaveric for giving me the macro point of few for which to make a decision on this girl. Ultimately, one can only go with their gut. But I've turned to this forum because I'm deep in the grey zone with this woman. The signals are so mixed. First of all, I've read all the books about thai girls and read the other websites. So I am familiar with how the p4p scene operates. Nothing wrong with that. As Tommyj4 says, at least with the bargirls you know where you stand. In the west, I know exactly where I stand. I can read them like a book. Here, the cross cultural differences are so great, that forums like these help us all try to make sense of it all. I'm no expert on Thailand. That's why i'm posting. But, I think dotcom might have nailed it. So I'll try to elaborate a little more for clarification. I'll try to keep it short.

I first met her a few weeks after the tsunami in her shop. I also met her two cousins who worked with her. After a few days I invited them to meet me and my mate at the Reggae pub. They showed, and we had a good time. No hanky panky. We hooked up again the second night, and my girl slept with me, and my mate slept with her cousin. I'm a complete newbie at this time, but when she left I slipped her 1500 baht. My mate said her cousin refused the money, saying we are not bargirls. We exchanged emails and then left for home. As I said, I exchanged emails but let it fade because she could'nt speak or write very well. Plus, I didn't know when I was too return. As one or two might have suggested otherwise on this forum, I treated her like a lady, with utmost respect, like I would any of my western girlfriends. Just my style. Cut to two years later. I ran into her cousin in the shop and she remembered me. I asked about my girl and she said she didn't have a boyfriend and would be happy to see me. I went to the other shop where she now worked and she jumped up and hugged me. The first thing i noticed was the new big tattoo on her back. Nothing against tattoos mind you. I think they are kind of sexy, but I am aware that in Thailand they are seen in a different light by some. Designed it herself she said proudly. Good for you honey. Anyway we stayed together for three days. Me taking care with restaurants, food etc. Then my wallet got stolen. It wasn't her, she was at work. It was the shady hotel lady where I was staying. But that's another story. I had to cut my stay short, and while she didn't ask for any money, I gave her my last 500 baht. Small I know, I told her to use it for motorbike gas. I vowed to stay in touch with her as i said. But when I got home I was wondering when and if it was going to come. That proverbial call for money. Again, I never promised her a rose garden. A house, whatever. I said we are just getting to know each other. And she agreed that it was not money she wanted but my heart. Anyway, the call came that she lost her job. But as I said, if I was even thinking about going further with this woman I needed to believe her. She does work hard in that shop all day. That is a given. Anyway, I sent her 5000 baht. She was happy. Then three weeks later still out of a job, she sms's me that her grandfather died. Here we go I thought. I then sent her another 5000 baht, hoping it was a job issue. Three weeks later another sms for money. This time I didn't respond. Two days later she sms's back and said she solved the ploblem on her own. Which brings me too this past March. My last visit. This time I was officially coming to Samui as her "boyfriend." OK. Here are the stats, the notes on a scorecard if you will, of my three week stay. We had a good time but i could see little things that didn't seem right. First of all, I always said to her that I will never lie to you. I haven't. And she constantly drives home the point that she talks straight and is ashamed of the other thai women that deceive farang. I said if you are thinking about a future with me then we will have to take time to know each other. And I flatly said that if you find another man because i'm not ready, then I understand. During the trip I took care of her doctor and dentist visits, restaurants and shopping. And to her credit she never tried to upsell me on anything. Nothing fancy. I still had great fun. All in all I'd say I gave her about 20 thousand baht to send home and other things. She then calls her mom and tells her this. Her Mom, translated back from my girl then says, "That's great but I want a house and kids." I could her a slight chuckle over the phone. To with i replied dryly, "maybe later." Anyway i met some of her friends, most were other shop girls, not hard women who smoked and drank too much. But the last real zinger was that at the end of my holiday, I told her that I was extending my stay by another week. I thought this might make her happy. But instead she seemed taken aback by this. Told me that I should stay maybe another two days then go home. At that point I said, I'll do what I want thank you very much. I stormed out of her shop. I related the story to a local Dane and his thai wife and they suggested that she might have a thai boyfriend in the background, or someone else coming into town. Of course, an hour later she calls me acting like a puppy dog saying she is now so happy that i'm staying. A little late for that. Things just aren't adding up. Anyway, I stayed the week and it was fine. But she still wanted to know the exact date I was leaving. Anyway, the reason i was even giving this girl a chance was because of her cousins. They are nice women, one married to a chinese thai, the other just married an Aussie. Lastly, last week I sent her 5000 baht to go home to issan. Whether she did or didn't I don't know. I have told her there is no more money until I see her back in Thailand. I'm not a sponser. I'm your friend. And if you want something to build on, then we need more time. Again, if you meet somebody else, so be it. You can tell me. As I said, I am no buffalo, far from marriage, just wanted to help out someone who was working hard. Just trying to figure out if she is all lies. And yeah, as Big C, said, I had talked about her getting her own shop down the line. That is if I can trust her. Right now things are not looking good. Doesn't mean i won't keep swinging the bat though! Thanks for the feedback everyone. I'll keep you posted. I may come for a month in September to see what develops. Anyway, that's my story and I'm sticking to it. cheers.

Posted (edited)

your story seems very classic, the girl certainly has other foreigner in the background coming when you were supposed to leave.

as i say to every friend that come to visit thailand, run away from people asking you for money, thailand has enough girls well paid, well educated, speaking english very well to fall into the trap of greedy girls.

i must admit finding such girls in samui is pretty hard , but in bangkok it's very easy, samui is a touristic place with the kind of bisuness to entertain the visitors and low salary people (wich barely went to school) that came here to look for money no matter the way they get it.

a good relationship is never based on money but on feelings or matching points, making a gift (not houses or expensive phones) is better than giving money.

As i heard when i was a kid, give a fish to someone he'll eat for one day, teach him how to fish, he'll eat for the rest of his life, giving money to someone is creating a bad addiction and thus changing the relationship.

of course if someone asks you for money to buy a bottle of water when it's 30° degrees outside, don't apply what i said previously :o

Edited by NHJ
Posted

No marriage for me Tommyj4 but thanks for the wishes! By the way you were right about her father. She tells me he cries himself to sleep every night on three tall Changs. Lightweight. Least he could do with my money is drink six!

NhJ, you are right on with the money. I spent a little to get my answer. But no more. Just come for fun now. But if I do decide to settle down I'll do my hunting in bangkok. Or maybe Chang Mai.

Posted
<br />No marriage for me Tommyj4 but thanks for the wishes! By the way you were right about her father. She tells me he cries himself to sleep every night on three tall Changs. Lightweight. Least he could do with my money is drink six!<br /><br />NhJ, you are right on with the money. I spent a little to get my answer. But no more. Just come for fun now. But if I do decide to settle down I'll do my hunting in bangkok. Or maybe Chang Mai.<br />

i met thee girls from chiang mai here in samui, two were working here, the other came on holiday(a real holiday not the old story :o ), all the three had a normal job very well paid and a wonderfull level of english, it was a pleasure to discuss with them with no language barrier on subjects like global warming etc etc...

good luck and have fun m8

Posted

Thanks NHJ

By the way, what did you mean by you have never met anyone working honestly during the day? Do you mean all shop people etc? Or did you mean at night? Thanks for the clarification, and your insights.

Posted
<br />Thanks NHJ<br />By the way, what did you mean by you have never met anyone working honestly during the day? Do you mean all shop people etc? Or did you mean at night? Thanks for the clarification, and your insights.<br />

sorry if it's not clear sometime, english is not my main language.

i was speaking about night meeting aroung the greenmango/reggae area, personnaly i almost never met a girl having a normal job and going to enjoy the dance/music/mood in the clubs.

all the girls that i spoke to were either freelancers,bar girls once i met a massage girl(with happy ending) and a hair cutter but that's all.

one more thing, i would say 98% of the girls hunting are coming from issan, having a baby already, i guess you know the rest...

Posted

I had a internetshop in Samui before and many 'shop girls' were my customer.

Most of them were bargirls before and had a boyfriend who wanted them to stop 'working'.

Laundryshop, barbershop, clothingshops were setup by these guys to get them into a decent job.

Once the guy is gone, freelancing is the favorite pasttime.

I know this because they told me so, and were very proud of the fact that they could manipulate 4-5 men at the same time. Showing of to the other girls because these girls had it made.

A shop, monthly allowances etc. And the best thing of working in a shop is that guys think they are not prostitutes.

Mind you, not ALL of them, but if they are under 45 and looking good the percentage is very high.

Of the 8 shops directly next to mine 7 were in the 'game'.

Posted

Good info Khun Jean. I thought if she worked in a shop then she wasn't a prostitute. However, I don't think she was ever a bargirl. I met her at 21. She's now 26. As I said she had always worked with her couisin since she was nineteen. Her cousin verified that without her around one day. No need to lie on that because it was just a general conversation. But what concerned me was, that after all those many years, my girls cousin fired her. That was the job she lost that i sent her money for. By the way her cousins mom, and my girls mom, are sisters. My girls aunt won't talk to her now. She said she didn't know why they fired her, she never did anything wrong. Of course, when I see her cousin at her shop I don't say anything other than hi. My girl says her cousins gone hi-so now. Anyway, a thai women in the States told me that all Thai people have are their family relationships. When part of that support network goes, then most of the poorer women will turn to bargirls. So on my third trip out, I wanted to see how she was doing, maybe help out a bit if she was sincere. She doesn't like email. Just the Sms and phone. I tried listening for her cell to ring at night but maybe in three weeks did it go off but once. She never stepped away to talk to anyone from me. Maybe she does her work in the shop I don't know. But every time i stopped by she was hard at work pitching clothes. But I obviously know being around the game eventually gets to them. Her boss asked me how much i was sending her every month. My girl doesn't wear lavish jewelry, she had the same old cell phone she had two years ago. Even if she does have some sponsers, she's obviously not killing it. So as you can see a very mixed bag. That said, with so many farang hitting on her in the shop, it is my strong hunch, that a few find their target. And since I am not one hundred percent committed she knows she is free to do as she pleases.

Posted

Luxecat,

it is a classic story indeed. You two spent a nice time together, you have showed respect for her but don't you think you are the only one on the payroll. The end of the story is (always) the same!

Posted
I know at least 3 REPUTABLE girls...wont say exactly where they work but you would be very suprised that go to Mango etc.....almost everyday......how do most of these shop girls on 6k-10K a month have 12k phones, motorbikes(not rented or on the drip) & a little gold...think about it....

lottery winners??? :o:D

Posted

luxecat - well seems you have things in order, least in your head. Believe it or not normal thai ladies do not ask for dosh, one of the dead give aways. Ms. Brit has never asked a single baht from me - she works and has her own dosh. Got me thinking maybe I should ask her for some dosh????

Any rate take your time, and control your finances and you should be fine. Lads only get in deep shi*e when they don't treat a relationship in thailand like they would back home. Some reason they get stupid and start handing over money, smth they would never do at home. Well next time you come to thailand, surprise her. :o

Might add far as bg(s) go - no matter what they do, always should be treated like ladies and with respect.

Posted
, thailand has enough girls well paid, well educated, speaking english very well to fall into the trap of greedy girls.

i must admit finding such girls in samui is pretty hard , but in bangkok it's very easy,

As I have read on this forum and been told by a Thai, educated Thai girls with good jobs aren't interested in farang men. The exception is if you get them over 30 and still single. At that point a farang is better than being an old maid.

Posted

Hey Koheesti...my wife was a nurse in a big international hospital when I first met her, and was 22 years old and a cracker to look at too. Also some of the female doctors at the same hospital had ferang husbands.

So I dont think it follows that only uneducated Thai girls go for ferang.

My wifes very best friend however dislikes all ferang. I suspect if we were back in the UK or where ever,

and we saw this happening then we would be accusing the person of being racist.

All nationalities have them but we are blinded to it by everything else going on here.

Dont you think?

HL :o

Posted
Rixalex,

In Thailand it is common to show respect by giving a little present/envelop/money. And they all have problems with money because the salary is very unfair.

What absurd nonsense. It's a surprise you can even spell the word "respect" to be honest.

What you want?

Why should a shop girl date a farang on a regular basis? The common reason is: Need for money. Even we talk about the Chaweng scene we are not in Europe, a Thai would not date a farang who is coming here for holidays if there is no need for money.

Phyisical attraction, chemistry, to name 2,. Thai women are no different to any others,.Now thai bar girls thats a different story but you are sterotyping again my friend,.i gave my wife nothing when we were going out together as she was working, i treated her no different to any other western woman i had dated,.by the way the thais get by just fine on the money they earn and most enjoy the lifestyle,that some of them would like more money is no different to some of us wanting to do better,. as many knights in shining armor that have rescued damsells in distress will testfy,.its all about selection,.
Posted

my friend mel met one in a hairdressers, he was jumping up and down and so proud he didnt have a bar girl for a girlfriend,and walking about with her on the arm like a peacock, 2 months later she asked hin for 300000 for her shop lease money,.he was suspicious ( better late than never ) and came back early to see her walking with another farang, he followed them and they parted, he approached the guy and politely asked about the girl, seems this american took her out of the bar bought the shop and had her run it..to keep her straight !,..i call them cid,.you can work out what it means ! :o

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