Sickening Story

[henryalleman]

I'm only having difficulties with some of these posts because I'm trying to work out where the hel_l 'FARANGLAND' is? Are we comparing thailand against the rest of the world with these statements?....If so then theres no wonder the crime rates are much lower in Thailand where theres only 63 million people compared to the billions of people in Farangland (assuming your talking about all the other countries where farangs originate from?....Why havent I seen this destination on any of my maps, whats going on henry?, please help.

I was only replying to the statements below. Farangland is not my invention

Yes, it is sickening but the same kind of thing goes on in Farangland everyday. Thought i would elighten you if you didnt know.

Now I accept that you might be predisposed to clouding this bad news item from Thailand but your suggestion that such attacks take place in Farangland everyday is nonsense.

[GuestHouse]

Qualtrough, the gang rape of children by adults is not a daily occurrence anywhere (with perhaps the exception of the atrocities that have been allowed to continue in the DRC).

No where do I state that this crime only occurs in Thailand - What I do say is that the statement that the gang rape of children by adults is a daily occurrence in Farangland (?!) is hog wash and further more that dragging up what happens elsewhere in the world when discussing heinous crime in Thailand is the last line of defense of those who just refuse to have anything negative said of Thailand no matter that the point of discussion did occur in Thailand and where the victim and the perpetrators where Thai.

You are keen the throw out the charge of ignorance (that of not knowing), while I for my part I imagine you hitting your google search button seeking excuses and apologies for crimes that have occurred in Thailand - Not at all ignorance - You do know, you simply wish to excuse.

We are discussing the gang rape in Thailand of a Thai child by Thai adults - It stands on its own for the heinous crime it is. I'm glad not to be counted amongst the apologists.

[bonobo]

While calling for 'exotic' punishments or the death penalty for Rapist might ease one's own frustrations they almost certainly would not reduce rape attacks and may also create an increased risk of murder where the rapist murders the victim in order to reduce the chances of being identified. Add to that the fact that most rapes take place within families and we get into the realms of victims giving evidence against parents/siblings/relatives who are then to face viscous punishment under the law.

One does not have to be liberal to see the folly of such punishments - a modicum of intelligence alone ought to suffice.

I do not know if there has ever been a reliable study on whether the death penalty for rapists would increase the number of murders of rape victims for fear of the victims identifying the rapists.  However, in my heart-of-hearts, I absolutely believe it to be true.

[bonobo]

To a certain degree agree that saying something like this happens everywhere can come across as blindly defending Thailand. But for so many people on this forum, this is the very first developing country they have ever been to, much less lived in and they so often come across as thinking these things are unique to Thailand.

 

people who come from the european/american/aussie etc countries are used to politically correct speech, pro active action, strong education formal and non formal, and separation of themselves from previous 'ethnic' or 'religious' codes. however, many of us live in countries that are second world ie first world economics but third world in other areas like ecology, women's rights, children's rights, education etc. and witness first hand the slow changes in attitudes among htese areas.

the fact that this rape even made the news is proof of 'bringing things out to the public'. in the past, im sure something like that wouldnt have even been reported. thailand has a long way to go, but by educating your own children and wives (and husbands, yes, i work hard explaining to anon (thai husband) about rape/child abuse -- not the victim's fault etc) you are helping educate others, since every daughter /wife/child talks to her/his friends.... i know. my daughters bring their friends over and they ask me questions that they are unable to ask their own parents due to religious/ethnic non tolerance to these subjects. i'm sure it made a difference at least once.

a better approach then belabouring the fact that thailand is a primitive and backward country unlike farangland (whereever that is since my farangland is different then most of yours)-- start education at home. if something does happen, be prepared that it is a more difficult fight then u might have in 'farangland' for instance: when i was a house mother a girl was molested at night by an intruder to the dorm. the girl also had a reputation as a 'mattress' for the group so the police were not totally convinced about the molestation. also, here, until recently, the victim had to go in the same room as the perpetrator and point him out and say, 'he did it'. how many 12 yr old/18 yr old/40 yr old women are willing ot go in the same room as their rapist and say 'this is he'? fortunately, through lobbying, now in israel u dont have to go in the room, u can do it like in the states, from a one way window.

i wouldnt be MORE afraid in thailand than any where else. just more aware, and educate my kids as much as i can. hope that all made sense.

bina

israel

A very astute post, bina, one which every parent should read.

[aussiejosh]

I recently heard about an international school student (a girl 17) who was raped at the music event culture one, I have seen her in school (years ago) and know her and its so sad and upsetting when you hear about these things happening to anyone. It especially hit home for my friends and I this week when we heard that she had been hanging out with our group when she was abducted, we had no idea that anything was wrong for over an hour... By that time it was too late, she was dumbed on Sinakarin road the next day after being raped by more people than she can remember and being beaten savagely. As far as I know she is still recovering in hospital.

Any banter and discussion on this is really irrelevant, these things happen all the time and its really up to us protect our loved ones and try and keep them safe. We can catch the bastard after, but we cant undo what has already been done. Prevention is the best policy, and western kids here are in so much danger every weekend it isn't even funny, I see Patana students as young as 13 years old out drinking and vommitting in the street (really 13!) and the parents are bloody oblivious, everyone thinks their child is differnt and smart and doesn't do these things, but all of them have told their parents "I am sleeping at a friends tonight"... EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM... I had 2 girls about 2 weeks ago (16 and 17) ask if they could spend the night at my place, I let them of course but they had only met me that night and trusted me because I helped the younger one get into a club but I literally could was anyone... This is such dangerous behavior and I have a feeling that the parents haven't a clue, I know my dad didn't back then. Didn't find out I was doing drugs for 3 years because I kept my grades up and didn't get into trouble but it didn't mean I was not being stupid and making insanely bad decisions (especially messing around with drugs in Thailand)... I am just lucky I was able to mature and make the decisions to help myself in the end, western parents seem to just be more into the le se fare style of management of their children.

[aussiejosh]

Ok this is ABSOLUTELY ridiculous, if 7 men RAPE a CHILD in the U.S. or Canada there is going to be a motherfooking MANHUNT to catch the dirty evil bastards, no question!! The same happens in Thailand and NOTHING is done. See the difference yet? By god!

So true, and the community would be the one pushing for it and be up in arms if they didn't get it... No one cares here. Not even the police, just a case number to be filed with the rest.

[jrbkk64]

Thailand has a HUGE problem in relation to this subject. Anybody who has lived here for a few years will start to see more and more of the enormous problem this is here. Every little village in Thailand has boy gangs with girls hanging on who fight with neigboring villages. Very often "enemy" girls are offered as prizes for winning silly competitions like a motorbike race or a football match or a fight.

People in "officialdom" often believe they have a right to any girl they fancy and play dirty tricks and threathen if they don't get their way. Many girls are offered as "compensation" for parents not being able to pay loan sharks. The girls are consequently raped and sold on to brothels catering to the local male population.

Many Thai guys think nothing of forcing a girl to have sex and know VERY well that they will get away with it most of the time. They either threaten the girl, pay some money or pay the BIB if necessary.

The above is a problem in many Asian and African countries although Thailand is one of the worst from my experience.

The main reasons are cultural(women being of a lower status than men), lack of justice/accountability and corruption.

I am in no way implying that these incidents don't occur in more developed countries but at least there is a sense of justice in those countries and women are protected (maybe too much so) much better.

We may also consider that justice in Thailand is often a payment to the victim or the victim's family and we will never know about as it does not go through the offical justice system.

[bobbysan124]

Just watching Thai news eating dinner and saw the most sickening report. 7 Thai men raped a 13 year old girl in a deserted house near khon khen (how ever you spell that).

I have seen a few news stories like this in recent months and i know of 2 thai friends who were raped when young. My GF tells me that it is not uncommon for ladies walking alone to get bundled into cars and gang raped. She tells me rape is a huge problem in Thailand and is always scared of walking alone. I know this happens all over the world and is not exclusive to Thailand, but is this a major problem here? Should we be more concerned for our partners safety here than in our home lands?

It sickens me to think that 7 grown men coordinated and carried out such an evil act.

thoughts ? Experiences? Knowledge?

This was front page headlines of the Thai newspapers this morning. Yes, it is sickening but the same kind of thing goes on in Farangland everyday. Thought i would elighten you if you didnt know.

Wake up! The OP indicated that he knows it happens everywhere.

[Sabum]

nm

Edited February 12, 2009 by Sabum

[Jungian]

Yes, it is sickening but the same kind of thing goes on in Farangland everyday. Thought i would elighten you if you didnt know.

The topic under discussion is the rape of a child by seven adults in Thailand.

Now I accept that you might be predisposed to clouding this bad news item from Thailand but your suggestion that such attacks take place in Farangland everyday is nonsense.

I can't remember the last time I heard of any such attack in any of the corners of Farangland I've lived in, that such attacks take place is probably without doubt - But that they take place every day utter hogwash.

This is where I am from in "Farangland" and when you made your statement I just thought I would look at today's news.

PHILADELPHIA (CBS 3)

A South Philadelphia man has been arrested for allegedly raping a 13-year-old and investigators believe there could be more victims.

According to sources, a warrant was served on a home in the 1400 block of S. Mole Street Tuesday afternoon and 21-year-old Aquan Spearman was taken into custody....

Need I say more?

Edited February 12, 2009 by Jungian

[Sabum]

Ya you might take notice of the WARRANT, the news interest and the fact there will be justice! Unlike Thailand.

[aussiejosh]

Yes, it is sickening but the same kind of thing goes on in Farangland everyday. Thought i would elighten you if you didnt know.

The topic under discussion is the rape of a child by seven adults in Thailand.

Now I accept that you might be predisposed to clouding this bad news item from Thailand but your suggestion that such attacks take place in Farangland everyday is nonsense.

I can't remember the last time I heard of any such attack in any of the corners of Farangland I've lived in, that such attacks take place is probably without doubt - But that they take place every day utter hogwash.

This is where I am from in "Farangland" and when you made your statement I just thought I would look at today's news.

PHILADELPHIA (CBS 3)

A South Philadelphia man has been arrested for allegedly raping a 13-year-old and investigators believe there could be more victims.

According to sources, a warrant was served on a home in the 1400 block of S. Mole Street Tuesday afternoon and 21-year-old Aquan Spearman was taken into custody....

Need I say more?

The difference between what your saying and what is said in Thailand is they actually caught that guy. The fact it goes on is not disputable, but the scale is far out of proportion, or maybe guys comprehend proportions and scales; in a country with a population of approximately 60 million the scale is way out of proportion to try and offer and form of a defense for these people or the culture which breeds these types of ideas. It is obvious this is a far worse problem here than abroad if you try to deny that you are completely ignorant.

An Indian Thai friend I had here tried to stress to me the importance of these issues when in the context of my then girlfriend and how I am not understanding the culture and their mentality towards this subject, I never understood what he meant until culture one(which the girl from my old school was raped during).

Edited February 12, 2009 by aussiejosh

[bonobo]

This incident has been a topic here at work.  My partner (Thai) explained that rapes do not get reproted mostly because a woman who has been raped is now "despoiled." "Decent" men will never marry them.

It is a sad state of affairs.  A raped woman is victimized not only by the rapist, but by her social network.

[Sabum]

I'd like to confirm this, I know girls that have lied about being raped, saying they have not, because it ruins their chances of getting a husband or their boyfriend will leave them.

[bonobo]

I'd like to confirm this, I know girls that have lied about being raped, saying they have not, because it ruins their chances of getting a husband or their boyfriend will leave them.

In the last two days, I have had one Thai man and one Thai woman confirm this to me. 

[aussiejosh]

Thats horrible.

[qualtrough]

Qualtrough, the gang rape of children by adults is not a daily occurrence anywhere (with perhaps the exception of the atrocities that have been allowed to continue in the DRC).

No where do I state that this crime only occurs in Thailand - What I do say is that the statement that the gang rape of children by adults is a daily occurrence in Farangland (?!) is hog wash and further more that dragging up what happens elsewhere in the world when discussing heinous crime in Thailand is the last line of defense of those who just refuse to have anything negative said of Thailand no matter that the point of discussion did occur in Thailand and where the victim and the perpetrators where Thai.

You are keen the throw out the charge of ignorance (that of not knowing), while I for my part I imagine you hitting your google search button seeking excuses and apologies for crimes that have occurred in Thailand - Not at all ignorance - You do know, you simply wish to excuse.

We are discussing the gang rape in Thailand of a Thai child by Thai adults - It stands on its own for the heinous crime it is. I'm glad not to be counted amongst the apologists.

I am not an apologist, the crime recounted was indeed atrocious. Crimes like that may indeed occur here more often than in other wealthier and more developed nations, that should come as a surprise to none. It does not advance your case, however, to imply that such crimes are almost unheard of where you come from, which is clearly not the case. You have a pattern of behavior in which you always seek to display Thailand in the worst possible light while doing the opposite with your home country. I don't know what is more annoying, that, or the pompous tone of your posts. You obviously still have issues from your time spent here. I hope you are able to resolve them successfully.

[BillyBobThai]

Had a friend back in the states get raped when she was in high school. I remember her as being more angry that scared to go out. The rapist should be caught and convicted, followed by swift sentancing to phyiscal casteration. This would be done with a

kg hammer and an anvil. First you tap the testicle and then smash it. The rape victim could be offered the oppertunity to do the surgery. This would help rape victims in dealing with the rape.

[Jungian]

Nevertheless once the deed is done "WARRANTS", arrests, suspects and convictions do little to comfort the victim or the family. My point is (was) it doesn't matter where you go in the world there are people that do things we consider unacceptable, it doesn't matter if it is Baghdad, New York, Paris, Rome or Chiang Mai people are the same and if you believe other wise you are not being realistic or honest with yourself. If I believed for one minute that Philadelphia or New York were safer to raise my two daughters I would be on the next flight home.

[aussiejosh]

Philadelphia or New York were safer to raise my two daughters I would be on the next flight home.

Well yeah you just said Philadelphia or New York, I think they are in the top 5 for crime in the US anyway, Detroit being up there as well.

If you wanted to go somewhere 'safe', Australia would most likely be that for raising children. UK is full of chavs, US is full of everything, and I am not just saying this because I am Australian because for the reasons of it being so safe and so clean I hate it, you can't do anything even late at night. On an completely empty road in the middle of the bush, you want to get home a little bit faster, there is no one around at all, and so you push the speed limit by 10-20kmph and randomly hiding in shrubs or something a dam_n police officer will pop out of nowhere and arrest you... "Do you realise you were going this speed" "yes" "do you realize you are danger to other drivers?" "fuc_k no i am not, there is no one here"... 220$ fine license gone because it was a long weekend and its double points lost.

That is plain anal.

I love living and traveling around Asia, not because I am here to break the laws or anything because the punishments are far worse, because there are less laws. Yes they protect you and your family but while I am young and without a family I love it.

[Jungian]

And yes, it does happen every day at least in the USA... I worked in a level 1 trauma center for many years and case for case there were more rapes than heart attacks, shootings/stabbings, or car accidents. We went through more rape kits than tetanus injections. This is a sick and twisted world we live in. Below are just a few google results I retrieved in less than 3 minutes, I bet you could fill a book by the end of the day.

RICHMOND, Calif. — Two men and two teens have been arrested on suspicion of gang-raping a woman last month in the San Francisco Bay area while allegedly taunting her for being a lesbian, police said Thursday.

Officers arrested Humberto Hernandez Salvador at his Richmond home Wednesday night, Richmond police Lt. Mark Gagan said. The 31-year-old is being held without bail on gang rape, kidnapping and carjacking charges.

Police on Wednesday also arrested a 15-year-old Richmond boy and a 16-year-old Hercules boy, who were being held at a juvenile detention center on similar charges. Their names were not released.

The Guardian, Saturday 5 June 2004

Tamika Bravo is eating spare ribs in an east London noodle bar. She's 19 years old and has a one-year-old son. She's talking about gang rapes. "They happen all the time, man. You hear about them in school - girls who went with a boy and his mate, who went with five boys. It's so common."

Victim: Gang-Rape Cover-Up by U.S., Halliburton/KBR

KBR Told Victim She Could Lose Her Job If She Sought Help After Being Raped, She Says

By BRIAN ROSS, MADDY SAUER & JUSTIN ROOD

Dec. 10, 2007

A Houston, Texas woman says she was gang-raped by Halliburton/KBR coworkers in Baghdad, and the company and the U.S. government are covering up the incident.

US Marines' Gang-rape of a Filipina: A Violation of a Woman’s Right ...

by AJLPP-USA

Sunday Dec 3rd, 2006 10:43 PM

On December 4, the Philippine Court will release a verdict on the following four US Marine “visiting troops” charged with gang-raping a 22-year old Nicole and a fresh graduate from a Catholic University: Lance Corporals Daniel Smith (principal accused), Dominic Duplantis, Keith Silkwood and Staff Sergeant Chad Carpentier. The latter three were reportedly at the scene cheering while the principal suspect was raping Nicole inside a cruising van at Subic Bay Freeport, which used to be part of the biggest US military naval base in the last Philippines, last Nov. 1, 2005.

US Marines' Gang-rape of a Filipina: A Violation of a Woman’s Right and a Nation’s Sovereignty

[aussiejosh]

Well yeah you just said Philadelphia or New York, I think they are in the top 5 for crime in the US anyway

Heh, they haven't been in over 15 years my bad.

Edited February 13, 2009 by aussiejosh

[Jungian]

Well yeah you just said Philadelphia or New York, I think they are in the top 5 for crime in the US anyway

Heh, they haven't been in over 15 years my bad.

I don't disagree with you but what do I do... go to LA, Miami, Detroit, or the deep south where my children and wife would be abused for not being white let alone not Christian including myself. I suppose I could go to Montana, Wyoming, Iowa and be a country doc. but that's not my style. I lived in South Dakota for 2 years to do a little soul searching but in all honesty I was almost board to death and believe it or not at the time (I don't know about now) there was not a BMW dealer in the entire state and when I asked where I could find one the local mechanic told me that's what you get for buying an ENGLISH car!

[HorseDoctor]

My ex-wife was raped by one of her classmates. This was how she lost her virginity.

She explained the she and her girl friend went to one of her male classmates house after school.

The male classmates told the girls they were to either let him screw them both or he would call his brother and he would bring his friends around and they would make a party of it.

My ex said ok, and she let him rape her but the friend said no and she paid the price, the older brother came with his friends and she was gang raped.

My ex staggered home and when her dad saw the blood on her legs etc he went ballistic, informed the police and the male classmate ended up spending some time in in a prison of some sorts. I am not too sure of all the details as my ex didn't want to get into them or didn't really understand as she was too young.

So, there was as far as I know a little justice metered out on that part, unfortunately the other girl didn't have any family members that cared enough and her gang rape went unoticed.

The ex spoke about it as though it was fairly normal occurance and not much of a big deal.

A few years later into our married life she let me know a little more about why the Dad was so p1ssed off and brought charges against the guy, it seemed the Mum had already sold my ex wife's virginity to some old Japanese sicko pervert <deleted> in Sriracha and since the ex was raped the Mum couldn't collect the money.

Unfortunately for Thailand that Mum had three daughters who all ended up on the game at the age of 16, helped out by their Mum....

Now tell me how any society in the world where a parent could ever treat their daughter(s) like this can teach the young men to respect women enough not to see them as walking TNA?

The most unfortunate part about this story is that all three daughters ended up marrying foreigners and have added probably a combined tally of around 100 million baht into the family so far, not bad for an Udon family who sold fish in the local wet market before they had a couple of girls.

All three girls have had failed marriages, have drug problems and all sorts of issues but the family have nearly 10 houses and apartments, several cars and so therefore the respect of anyone who knows them...

Makes me feel sick.

Virginity : This idolization of a flap of skin is one of the better examples of how women, ( AKA, " Girls " in Thai Visa speak) are sexualized beyond humanity, thus rape becomes commonplace and acceptable

Thailand isn't the only country where " Girls" are valued for sexuality above all. Back in US, it is impossible for " girls" between the age of 12 - 55 to walk on the street without a constant barrage of verbal sexual assault.

Meanwhile in Thailand Students forced to wear skirts , university students must wear heels , etc , it'a all systemic chauvanism and the entire immigration system has CENSORED Thai women, by way of marriage to foreign men - of which quite a large percentage of TV members posters are guilty .

Just the habit of referring to fully grown women as " Girls " ( if they are sexually desirable ) feeds into the systematic sexual objectifying of women.

Edited February 13, 2009 by HorseDoctor

[aussiejosh]

between the age of 12 - 55

LOL 55? ...exaggeration... Plus most women conform to these ideals and act and dress pretty promiscuous in most western countries, brought up in a system that starts this from a young age, everything we do to our children (from as simple as dressing them or telling them what to wear) impacts on their psychology and ideas at the end of the day. Sexism starts with language anyway, English has a few nice examples as I am sure Thai probably does, although the OP doesn't specify sexism it is the main cause and the base of this whole issue. Think about it, one of the most used insults in English is the word <deleted>, the basic meaning is sex or more specifically penetration, so when you use insults like "<deleted> you" or "get f*cked" it forms the idea that to be the one being 'f*cked" is the lesser... of course naturally females are penetrated much more and thus the idea begins to form consciously or subconsciously... Every culture promotes these ideas from the start.

Another quick example, widely considered the worst word in English is c*nt, original meaning was vagina. So these 2 words are pretty much creating the mindset that women are inferior.

I really find it disturbing how unreported and common these stories are in Thailand, every time my girlfriend leaves my place I record the taxi details but I can't protect her all the time. As much as I would like to.

[eek]

Then what to do about educating mens minds about respect for women here? Is the attitude changing with the younger generation?

--

Some time ago, maybe a year ago, I read a comment from a well-known and long-time member here (I wont mention the name). His comment regarding rape has stayed with me, because i couldnt believe a western man could hold such a viewpoint. He basically asked why women, if they have had sex before, would have a problem with rape. Because they had sex before, its just sex, so shouldnt be a big deal. ..was stunned..to say the least.

So, if men (even men from "educated" cultures), can hold a belief like this, it makes me think that there needs to be some education in what rape does to a person. How to provide and get that education across though?

[bonobo]

Then what to do about educating mens minds about respect for women here? Is the attitude changing with the younger generation?

--

Some time ago, maybe a year ago, I read a comment from a well-known and long-time member here (I wont mention the name). His comment regarding rape has stayed with me, because i couldnt believe a western man could hold such a viewpoint. He basically asked why women, if they have had sex before, would have a problem with rape. Because they had sex before, its just sex, so shouldnt be a big deal. ..was stunned..to say the least.

So, if men (even men from "educated" cultures), can hold a belief like this, it makes me think that there needs to be some education in what rape does to a person. How to provide and get that education across though?

I am afraid that is the nature of the beast, and thousands of years of culture have helped define it. No amount of teaching is going to stomp out this sort of mysogeny.

However, there does seem to be a wane and flow of this type of thinking over time and through various cultures, so this does lead one to believe that education and even being PC (not to start a PC debate here) might be able to limit the amount of this type of thinking, or at least actions which reflect this type of thinking.

Aussiejosh makes some good points as to the English language. I do think the foudnation of this problem may very well be in the language. Language itself helps formulate thinking.

We may not be able to stop out anti-social behaviours, but perhaps we can lesson the frequency of anti-social actions.

[eek]

I am afraid that is the nature of the beast, and thousands of years of culture have helped define it. No amount of teaching is going to stomp out this sort of mysogeny.

However, there does seem to be a wane and flow of this type of thinking over time and through various cultures, so this does lead one to believe that education and even being PC (not to start a PC debate here) might be able to limit the amount of this type of thinking, or at least actions which reflect this type of thinking.

Aussiejosh makes some good points as to the English language. I do think the foudnation of this problem may very well be in the language. Language itself helps formulate thinking.

We may not be able to stop out anti-social behaviours, but perhaps we can lesson the frequency of anti-social actions.

I think education/teaching can change attitudes. The younger generation especially are more receptive and can benefit. Education via soap operas, schooling, movies. Actually I think some of the Thai movies have been showing the devastating effects rape can have already (albeit in strange ways, such as through horror movies..ie: ghostly revenge of a rape victim who killed herself - Shutter) Even if it takes time, generations even, baby steps are better than no steps at all. Also not just for rape, but assault, incest, domestic abuse, etc. Basic human rights awareness and understanding for men, women and children.

I realise its easy for me to sit on my bum and type this. Im not actively doing anything to provide those steps. Truly dont know where to start, but if someone can point me in the right direction, i would be happy do what I can to get involved and help.

[aussiejosh]

The problem with men is they cant empathize with women, they can't even try to understand what intercourse or being touched is from a female point of view. Typically younger men are much more physical with each other and hurting each other slightly never seems to be a big deal, as we do the penetration it is hard for most men to try and get away from the idea that this is just another form of physical fun for women as it is as much for men (as they aren't the ones being hurt or penetrated)... That mixed with cultural factors and pop culture push the image of women as sexual objects that they are ones who are penetrated.

I can kind of understand what the guy was trying to say when he said something along the lines of "If they have had sex before then it shouldn't be a big deal", I can understand what kinda of idea he is coming from, and that is more common than people would like. Now I totally disagree with is, as I have studied social dynamics specifically relating to human relationships (specifically relationships are built) so I have a better understanding how completely differently womens minds work compared with the majority of men, unfortunately that kind of idea is hard to get every day people to understand.

I will give a short example. To women, men who cheat and say they don't love the other person and that it was purely sexual will more likely stay in the relationship accepting the fact that he didn't love her, women are more emotional. However if the male says he thought he loved her or something along those lines using love or the his interpretation of love as an excuse he totally totally ruins the chances of the relationship ever returning to any form of normalcy as the concept of love hits harder to home with women. However if a woman cheats on a man usually one of the first things that would enrage a male is the fact that another man has been with 'your women' (another sexist mentality but it has evolved with our culture), the mere idea alone of someone penetrating 'your woman' will infuriate you.

This again could be due to the fact of the penetrating vs being penetrated alone. The issue is so complex it could write 100 essays on it (have have written a few).

Unfortunately sexism will always exist, to say that we aren't different is a lie, its pure science men and women think differently. To suggest that one side is inferior is debatable, but in modern times I have a feeling and to an extent hope that women will have some time on top of this vicious cycle...

I mean after all you rarely hear about women raping men.

PS:

I love studying how humans interact and little things you can do to get the upper hand in conversations or build rapport faster it just makes meeting people and putting them at easy with you faster and easier.

Edited February 13, 2009 by aussiejosh

[Sakeopete]

Yes, it is sickening but the same kind of thing goes on in Farangland everyday. Thought i would elighten you if you didnt know.

The topic under discussion is the rape of a child by seven adults in Thailand.

Now I accept that you might be predisposed to clouding this bad news item from Thailand but your suggestion that such attacks take place in Farangland everyday is nonsense.

I can't remember the last time I heard of any such attack in any of the corners of Farangland I've lived in, that such attacks take place is probably without doubt - But that they take place every day utter hogwash.

Well I can confirm its happening in my part of farangland. A last survey by the government showed that their is every day a girl is raped in school. In the capital continues Gang rapes of several day's is not so uncommon, Police statistics confirm it, but is not published in newspapers because its not political correct to tell that a certain population are the main culprits. Its also a fact that the raped women of that group dare not go public because it will mean that they become outcasts in their family and society, due to the fact that its regarded as always the woman's fault that she is being raped. There are raping at public buses, trams, trains and metro stations; In some parts of towns people don't walk anymore after sunset. And this is happening in every major town in in Northern farangland's on a daily bases.

I even dare to make the bold statement that the rape and crime rate in LOS is lower than in Farangland.

Your last sentence doesn't make sense to me, you are trying to compare countries with totally different values when it comes to exposing their faults. North America, Europe & Aus-NZ may not like letting people see their dirty laundry but thanks in part to the relatively free media everything that can be exposed usually is. Sure it may be sensationalized and mistakes are made but issues are brought into the light.

Asia on the other hand values saving face and the opposite is true here so I can't see how anyone could compare rates of anything that embarrasses the country because they do their damnedest to hide it.

The tainted milk scandal in China is a perfect illustration, if NZ Foremost dairy didn't threaten the Chinese government to go public with the melamine contamination China wouldn't have said a thing and more babies would have died. Its only the threat to having their exports rejected that they make any announcements concerning quality inspections at all.