The Smaller Scams That Lead To The Bigger Distrust In Relationships.

[G54]

I am sure many of us here have been scammed by our g/f / partners and maybe we do not know about it. Yet a lot of these small scams lead to me, personally, distrusting more and more people along the way.

I will add, that I do have 3 people I know I can trust but I have known them for 18+ months in each case. And they are all ladies. So this is not a rant purely about ladies.

I made a recent post asking about schools being open, as I was fairly sure I was about to be scammed.

Late one evening I was told a lady needed 9,000 Baht for an urgent payment for a computer course. The money had to be paid the following morning at 9 a.m. The lady in question needed 'help'. Help being the operative word.

So, I posted on TV and got a fast response. Following morning my suspicions were confirmed locally that the school was closed and would be for the rest of the Sonkran week.

I got a call early on Sunday morning to meet for coffee to discuss the 'help'.

I went along and we sat and talked. I already knew about the up-coming computer course and the need to pay for it. Apparently her mother had lent her the 9,000 that morning and she wanted it paying back. She says she had paid the school that morning. (The school that was closed).

Then came the crunch. You give I 9,000 now! And the hand shot out.

I asked to see the receipt.

No receipt. I shook my head and walked away.

Another one.

Yesterday I discover how much milk a 2 year old baby drinks - on average - in a month. Now I understand I was being scammed again.

Due to having a lot of aggravation going on in the background at this particular time, I did not even consider how much milk a 2 year old would consume in a week, never mind in a month.

I went to the shops with the lady in question and I paid for the milk. No problem 750 Baht a box (big box). Next week was the same. Every Monday for maybe 3 months. 4 large boxes of milk a month at 750 Baht each.

Now I discover a 2 year old will consume about 1 box a month. Not 4.

Begs the question of what was happening to the other 3 boxes.

To my mind, they were being sold on. No way was the baby drinking that much. So this small scam netted her nearly 3,000 Baht a month.

If it had not been for a chance conversation, I would never even have thought I was being scammed over the milk.

OK, in neither case was this a lot of money. The money is not the point. It is the trust.

Above are just 2 instances. I know of quite a few more over the years. Surely if a man is helping a Thai lady out, if a man is paying the rent, the electric, food, nights out and such, we could or should expect some honesty in return from our girlfriends?

Yes, I have had Thai men scamming me in small ways and because of that, the friendships have ended through a lack of trust.

As I say, it is not so much about the money but them building a lack of distrust that then leads on into other relationships. Therefore we head onwards and become ever more distrusting. Surely that has to damage a fledgling relationship?

[thaicbr]

G54. You and I are just the ATM machines. Your lucky, my mate just found out the hard way how they scheme. He has lost the lot, car, motorcycle, baby, all his money etc. 1 week ago every thing seemed fine, they were waiting for spouse visa to the US. now he has 2,000 baht to his name.

[LooseCannon]

I am sure many of us here have been scammed by our g/f / partners and maybe we do not know about it.

No - never.

I think that you need to be a bit more discerning in the way you choose your partners.

Alternatively, try another country as your recent posts have shown you suffer from a severe lack of judgement when selecting Thais as friends.

[eek]

I am sure many of us here have been scammed by our g/f / partners and maybe we do not know about it.

No - never.

I think that you need to be a bit more discerning in the way you choose your partners.

Alternatively, try another country as your recent posts have shown you suffer from a severe lack of judgement when selecting Thais as friends.

Nor I.

[ThaiLife]

I quickly learned that the word ''Help'' in Thai , translates in the mind of the person requesting Help , as '' Gift '' its a sad fact of Thai life but there you have it.

[G54]

I am sure many of us here have been scammed by our g/f / partners and maybe we do not know about it.

No - never.

I think that you need to be a bit more discerning in the way you choose your partners.

Alternatively, try another country as your recent posts have shown you suffer from a severe lack of judgement when selecting Thais as friends.

I do try, but I fail badly, but that is with the g/f's.

The real Thai friends have never been a problem. Better that way. No romance involved.

And I have not given up hope, I just refuse to knuckle under

[johna]

yes I have been scammed, and have learned from it, but it was in the UK

[LooseCannon]

And I have not given up hope, I just refuse to knuckle under

Good for you.

Now accept that it is the price you will just have to pay.

[robblok]

Never got scammed by my gf.

Did get scammed by a neighbour guy around 18 or so. He shows up at my door all bloody (lives next door) saying he needs money to go to a clinic and will pay it back the next day

I give it to him its only a lil bit of money 250 bt but i did expect it back the next day. I mean why on earth would i handout money and not expect it back.. after trying to collect a few times i gave up and next time he has an accident he better not come to me.

Its not about money its about trust.

[samuibeachcomber]

Never got scammed by my gf.

Did get scammed by a neighbour guy around 18 or so. He shows up at my door all bloody (lives next door) saying he needs money to go to a clinic and will pay it back the next day

I give it to him its only a lil bit of money 250 bt but i did expect it back the next day. I mean why on earth would i handout money and not expect it back.. after trying to collect a few times i gave up and next time he has an accident he better not come to me.

Its not about money its about trust.

thats what this thread is about..............trust.the minute a thai person says they need the money immediately you know its a scam,you have to be continually on your guard when in a thai relationship.

[dave111223]

Surely if a man is helping a Thai lady out, if a man is paying the rent, the electric, food, nights out and such, we could or should expect some honesty in return from our girlfriends?

Your paying to have a Thai g/f and you "expect some honesty"???

There might be a few things you'd expect to get out of that situation; honesty aint one of them.

Edited April 20, 2009 by dave111223

[robblok]

thats what this thread is about..............trust.the minute a thai person says they need the money immediately you know its a scam,you have to be continually on your guard when in a thai relationship.

I dont really agree the part about the relationship. I have been married to a bad thai and lost a lot of money but now i have a good one.. Its a bit crazy to call them all bad. Just have to be selective.

Its more that when someone says loan and pay back.. i expect it if it doesnt happen it will make me trust people less.

[GuestHouse]

And they are all ladies. So this is not a rant purely about ladies.

You know I've got to say it........ the term 'Lady' is perhaps the most misused term uttered by foreigners in Thailand.

I don't know whether guys who habitually use the term 'Lady' are fooled, confused or jur kidding themselves.

[Sabum]

Ive never been scammed. But Im not an old man that needs to buy my "friends". Look... if you are old and want to sleep with young women you must pay, pretty simple really. If you are being scammed by people that you are not sleeping with than why is that happening? If someone asks me for money for ANYTHING, my response is immediately no, unless its like my best friend (can't see how that would be a Thai person but anything is possible I guess).

G54, if non lovers are asking for money why would you even consider it? Are you the saviour of Thailand and all its poor people?

[keithlee]

I am sure many of us here have been scammed by our g/f / partners and maybe we do not know about it.

No - never.

I think that you need to be a bit more discerning in the way you choose your partners.

Alternatively, try another country as your recent posts have shown you suffer from a severe lack of judgement when selecting Thais as friends.

Nor I.

no scam stories from me. i dont intend to marry bargirls.

[keithlee]

Surely if a man is helping a Thai lady out, if a man is paying the rent, the electric, food, nights out and such, we could or should expect some honesty in return from our girlfriends?

Your paying to have a Thai g/f and you "expect some honesty"???

There might be a few things you'd expect to get out of that situation; honesty aint one of them.

why not pay for the sex when you want it. im sure your gf would understand..............lol.

[samuibeachcomber]

thats what this thread is about..............trust.the minute a thai person says they need the money immediately you know its a scam,you have to be continually on your guard when in a thai relationship.

I dont really agree the part about the relationship. I have been married to a bad thai and lost a lot of money but now i have a good one.. Its a bit crazy to call them all bad. Just have to be selective.

Its more that when someone says loan and pay back.. i expect it if it doesnt happen it will make me trust people less.

sure i dont mean to tar everyone with the same brush,it was a generalised comment.

[songhklasid]

I know what you mean, I hope i'm wrong, but expierience & common dog pond can put suspicions in your mind,My g/f of 1 year has lost 2 phones when she's without it's hard to contact her, so she runs her own race,the other form of contact can be irregular (sister's phone) @ school or friends will not answer me, if it rings & she's home I get to speak to g/f maybe 2 times a week,is this an old trick ,maybe stored phone or sell?any similiar expieriences?

regards songhklasid.

[samuibeachcomber]

I know what you mean, I hope i'm wrong, but expierience & common dog pond can put suspicions in your mind,My g/f of 1 year has lost 2 phones when she's without it's hard to contact her, so she runs her own race,the other form of contact can be irregular (sister's phone) @ school or friends will not answer me, if it rings & she's home I get to speak to g/f maybe 2 times a week,is this an old trick ,maybe stored phone or sell?any similiar expieriences?

regards songhklasid.

Am not sure i understand what you're saying,but losing the phone is an old trick to get you to send money,usually they have n't lost it at all,or if they have they've pawned to a dealer for cash.

[keithlee]

i know a guy in similiar situation. he had hisself a bad thai girlfriend...............lol. the kind you dont take home to mommy.

[patklang]

I know what you mean, I hope i'm wrong, but expierience & common dog pond can put suspicions in your mind,My g/f of 1 year has lost 2 phones when she's without it's hard to contact her, so she runs her own race,the other form of contact can be irregular (sister's phone) @ school or friends will not answer me, if it rings & she's home I get to speak to g/f maybe 2 times a week,is this an old trick ,maybe stored phone or sell?any similiar expieriences?

regards songhklasid.

Now that sounds well dodgy

[samuibeachcomber]

I am sure many of us here have been scammed by our g/f / partners and maybe we do not know about it.

No - never.

I think that you need to be a bit more discerning in the way you choose your partners.

Alternatively, try another country as your recent posts have shown you suffer from a severe lack of judgement when selecting Thais as friends.

Nor I.

no scam stories from me. i dont intend to marry bargirls.

If you think scamming is the sole domain of bar girls,think again

[JimShortz]

On the milk thing....

I've got a three year old and he gets through 3 or 4 big boxes of milk each month. Depends on the kid...

[thithi]

say "No have money, honey"

she may spend those extra money on girls things.

Edited April 20, 2009 by thithi

[CharlieB]

Another one.

Yesterday I discover how much milk a 2 year old baby drinks - on average - in a month. Now I understand I was being scammed again.

Due to having a lot of aggravation going on in the background at this particular time, I did not even consider how much milk a 2 year old would consume in a week, never mind in a month.

I went to the shops with the lady in question and I paid for the milk. No problem 750 Baht a box (big box). Next week was the same. Every Monday for maybe 3 months. 4 large boxes of milk a month at 750 Baht each.

Now I discover a 2 year old will consume about 1 box a month. Not 4.

Begs the question of what was happening to the other 3 boxes.

To my mind, they were being sold on. No way was the baby drinking that much. So this small scam netted her nearly 3,000 Baht a month.

If it had not been for a chance conversation, I would never even have thought I was being scammed over the milk.

It's not 100% that this woman was scamming you. All kids are different. My daughter is 20 months now (not far off 2) and still drinks about a box of 1+ milk in maybe a week. It would also depend on how big the boxes are as well. The milk we get is about 900g per tub.

[Sabum]

I know what you mean, I hope i'm wrong, but expierience & common dog pond can put suspicions in your mind,My g/f of 1 year has lost 2 phones when she's without it's hard to contact her, so she runs her own race,the other form of contact can be irregular (sister's phone) @ school or friends will not answer me, if it rings & she's home I get to speak to g/f maybe 2 times a week,is this an old trick ,maybe stored phone or sell?any similiar expieriences?

regards songhklasid.

lol are you entirely serious? She makes it next to impossible to contact her and you wonder why? Get a clue man c'mon..... she has other men in her life and she can't risk having you call her all the time while she's with them.

[a2396]

Unfortunately, this stuf is more common than not her, regarding any romantic involvement with a Thai lady. Non romantic involvements with Thais, male or female, I have found to be no different than other places I ahve lived & generally they are honest. However, when it comes to a romance, it seem any ethical standards go out the window totally. In my 4 years here there is only one woman that I had any romantic involvement with that I would trust and I have known her for the whole time I have been in Thailand. My most recent sort-of GF, I have known for almost 2 years, but cannot believe much of what she says. Time we spend together is quality time, but it does not carry over to other situations & venues. Much of her life and motivations and involvements with other people just do not add up. I stay with here becasue the time we spend together is the best I have found in a woman here, but the rest of her life I don't understand.

[LooseCannon]

..............

If you think scamming is the sole domain of bar girls,think again,

Like I said - I have never been scammed/victim of an attempted scam by my wife.

Furthermore I have never been scammed/victim of an attempted scam by her family, close relatives, distant relatives, friends of the family, their work colleagues or any other Thai people that I mix with in any type of social setting.

If you find yourself being scammed by your wife/gf, their families & their friends I would suggest that you have made a very poor choice of partner & maybe when they have fleeced you of every last baht, you will choose your next partner with a lot more care.

[norrona]

one of the greatest scams I ever heard about was a mates g/f who stayed in his condo when he was back in U.K who decided to go out in her gold and visit royal garden plaza pattaya in the daytime, she came to my office crying as I was working over the road saying that she had woken up on one of the benches with no gold when she calmed down she said someone approached her and asked her to smell a bottle and she did not remember anything else, when I said to her that I know the security company whe operates there and lets go speak to them she became all shy and angry and accused me of not believing her

what was even worse was my then mate when I explained it all to him got even more short with me and accused me of jealousy towards his relationship

they really suit each other and are still married and living in U.K, her brother has just finished school in Korat and is now going to University so she has done well and so has the brother, he didn't buy her any more thai gold but treated her to a rolex watch and a gucci bag at bkk airport I got told....I see where she was brought up and have to say a rolex watch and gucci bag go really well down the local shop that sells chang beer and mama noodles

[thaimate]

yes I have been scammed, and have learned from it, but it was in the UK

in 19 years i have been scammed twice ,once by an english buisnesswoman and once by the guy that empties the cesspit,never ever been scammed by anyone else.