Why Are Westerners (men) So Focused On Sex?

[IanForbes]

Part of the answer lies in the number of replies to this topic in such a short time. Men as a whole are hard wired for sex. If the woman is young and attractive then men are going to hit on her one way or another starting from what ever method the men have had success with in the past. I'm quite sure if the OP was old, fat and ugly then there wouldn't be ANY men of any nationality making suggestive comments. If a woman is actually INTERESTING, no matter WHAT she looks like, then it doesn't matter. The conversation will gravitate to whatever is mutally acceptible and interesting to all participants. If a guy is handsome or a gal is attractive then they are going to be hit upon at some point in the game that men and women play with each other.

Men who have a lot of experience with women act in a self confident way and most women find that attractive. Many women like the "bad boy" image that some men portray and it attracts them like a bee to honey.

By contrast, average looking men with no confidence, and the shy men (who "might" be real nice guys) have a lot of trouble dealing with women in western societies. But, if they come to Thailand or the Philippines then that shyness disappears with all the bar girls coming onto them. Eventually, the shy man in Thailand finds himself in a artificial heaven of lovely ladies. His shyness is replaced with a boldness and he thinks he is the world's greatest lover. He is then more likely to talk about sex incessantly.

[bonobo]

 

By contrast, average looking men with no confidence, and the shy men (who "might" be real nice guys) have a lot of trouble dealing with women in western societies. But, if they come to Thailand or the Philippines then that shyness disappears with all the bar girls coming onto them. Eventually, the shy man in Thailand finds himself in a artificial heaven of lovely ladies. His shyness is replaced with a boldness and he thinks he is the world's greatest lover. He is then more likely to talk about sex incessantly.

I have witnessed this countless times.  When I first went to the Philippines, it was with a Marine recon platoon.  We had a few men who were quite fit, but rather shy with women.  Their history with women was rather skimpy, and I dare say a few of them were virgins.

Then we get to Subic, and they are still shy and uncertain for the first night in town.  But, amazingly to them, some Filipinas express an interest in them, and lo-and-behold, they spend teh night with a willing professional lady.  When this happens the next night as well, you can see the change come over them.  They have a swagger and confidence.  This makes them more at ease and more confident.  Of course, out of my platoon of 23 men, 16 wanted to get married before we left (two actually did tie the knot.)

Our next deployment was to Korea, and these same formerly shy men were no longer in this boat.  THey talked and jokeda bout sex, something they tended to stay on the sidelines before.

[IanForbes]

Of course, out of my platoon of 23 men, 16 wanted to get married before we left (two actually did tie the knot.)

I DID have a laugh at that. I've seen the same thing far too many times and it's oh so true. It's one reason why I believe the bar gals are doing a great service for men as a whole. But, as pointed out so many times on these forums, it is too easy to fall into the trap of a false situation. Men without experience are easy prey for smart women... for whatever reason the woman might have.

[PeaceBlondie]

Apparently you have a large sample size for 'westerners' and an exceedingly small sample size for 'asians'.

Apparently true for the OP, and not true for me. Latin-Americans, in my extensive experience, are very sexual. Also, my sample of Asian men has not been a sample of small sized men.

[cpofc]

By contrast, average looking men with no confidence, and the shy men (who "might" be real nice guys) have a lot of trouble dealing with women in western societies. But, if they come to Thailand or the Philippines then that shyness disappears with all the bar girls coming onto them. Eventually, the shy man in Thailand finds himself in a artificial heaven of lovely ladies. His shyness is replaced with a boldness and he thinks he is the world's greatest lover. He is then more likely to talk about sex incessantly.

I have witnessed this countless times. When I first went to the Philippines, it was with a Marine recon platoon. We had a few men who were quite fit, but rather shy with women. Their history with women was rather skimpy, and I dare say a few of them were virgins.

Then we get to Subic, and they are still shy and uncertain for the first night in town. But, amazingly to them, some Filipinas express an interest in them, and lo-and-behold, they spend teh night with a willing professional lady. When this happens the next night as well, you can see the change come over them. They have a swagger and confidence. This makes them more at ease and more confident. Of course, out of my platoon of 23 men, 16 wanted to get married before we left (two actually did tie the knot.)

Our next deployment was to Korea, and these same formerly shy men were no longer in this boat. THey talked and jokeda bout sex, something they tended to stay on the sidelines before.

Kumusta Ka!

Yes I totally agree with your statement, I guess I was much the same, but I got into step pretty fast!

Ahhh Subic Bay, Olongapo City and Magasaysay Drive, (not to mention Subic City & Marilyns Inn) my first visit to subic bay and manila was in 1970, two years prior to Marcos' Martial Law and at the height of the war in VN, it was like the Wild West in those days. I was a babe in the woods at 16 years of age and totally unsupervised. Boy did I grow up quick!

I was to spend the rest of my life visiting and living these places. I came extremely closed to marrying a Filippina myself in 1980.

So, Sorry if I am off topic but any mention of this stirs up overwhelming feelings of nostalgia!

Mag beer muna tayo

mag beer muna tayo

o anong sarap

ng San Miguel Beer

[bkkjames]

Apparently you have a large sample size for 'westerners' and an exceedingly small sample size for 'asians'.

Apparently true for the OP, and not true for me. Latin-Americans, in my extensive experience, are very sexual. Also, my sample of Asian men has not been a sample of small sized men.

too much info there PB...i just finished lunch.

Reminds me of a joke though "the only way he could give a girl / guy 12" would be to do her / him 4 times".

[eek]

Apparently you have a large sample size for 'westerners' and an exceedingly small sample size for 'asians'.

Apparently true for the OP, and not true for me. Latin-Americans, in my extensive experience, are very sexual. Also, my sample of Asian men has not been a sample of small sized men.

Haha! Thanks for that PB. I had no intention of replying to this thread, but i had to reply to what you wrote. I always find it quite funny that so many heterosexual men here often make the "size" snide. I wonder what they base their knowledge on. Maybe they like to go around trying to actively check out if they are bigger or not. Some men of course will be larger than average, but that also doesnt mean they are particularly good in knowing how to pleasing their partner. Big does not instantly mean good in the sack. That train of thought from a man quite likely makes them an inconsiderate lover as their focus is on the wrong thing.

Anyway..I dont wish to introduce some debate on this topic, just wanted to say thanks for the laugh PB ..and also to say that I think most people who have/have had male Thai partners would agree with you.

Edited July 1, 2009 by eek

[dave_boo]

Haha! Thanks for that PB. I had no intention of replying to this thread, but i had to reply to what you wrote. I always find it quite funny that so many heterosexual men here often make the "size" snide. I wonder what they base their knowledge on. Maybe they like to go around trying to actively check out if they are bigger or not. Some men of course will be larger than average, but that also doesnt mean they are particularly good in knowing how to pleasing their partner. Big does not instantly mean good in the sack. That train of thought from a man quite likely makes them an inconsiderate lover as their focus is on the wrong thing.

Anyway..I dont wish to introduce some debate on this topic, just wanted to say thanks for the laugh PB ..and also to say that I think most people who have/have had male Thai partners would agree with you.

I always tell them I may not be good in bed, but at least I'm fast; that way by the time they discover how bad I actually am, I'm already out of there.

Set the expectations low enough and there's nowhere to go but up!

And as a side note; one night I was out drinking at the local pool hall with a good friend (Thai). He was commenting to the group that he preferred katoeys since they were nice and tight. Another guy casually mentioned that there were no loose naughty bits, just small penises......

[simcity]

what wrong with sex ? it is free

[longstebe]

Most of the europeans walk into a store and there is newspapers or magazines (top shelf) with nudity.

Over the pond in the good old U.S.A they have a massive porn industry.Also they have the corner stores with mens magazines.

The Tv channels have porn.

My point is, its in our faces every day no matter where you go.

No complaints from me!!!!

[Soulwy]

Apparently you have a large sample size for 'westerners' and an exceedingly small sample size for 'asians'.

Apparently true for the OP, and not true for me. Latin-Americans, in my extensive experience, are very sexual. Also, my sample of Asian men has not been a sample of small sized men.

Reading your post I think I have to rethink Dave's comment. Haha...I thought Dave meant the number of Asian men I know, not the size of their tools...

My experience limits to only Dutch men...Talking about language barrier...

IanForbes:

"Men who have a lot of experience with women act in a self confident way and most women find that attractive. Many women like the "bad boy" image that some men portray and it attracts them like a bee to honey."

...nothing attractive about a man who's had numerous of different women...bweeh..

One more thing (I don;t want to open an other topic)

*"Men are men, "women running men's minds" (Bagwan/ Groucho Marx)

*"It has been said that in the west, you can talk about anything you want (sexually speaking), but can't do it. In Thailand, you can do anything you want, but can't talk about it." (Allane)

*On this forum you can read many topics about woman and sex. Posts from mostly Westerners.

I wonder if Asian men also like to write about women on internet (I have no idea as I don't understand Asian languages)

My question:

--> As Asian men are less expressive about their feelings ( I know some of you posted that your Asian friends also like to talk about sex in smaller groups but not in public) and Westerners do talk about this more freely:

Can we generalise that Westerners are more exhibitionists and Asians more voyeurs?

Edited July 1, 2009 by Soulwy

[kurtd99]

First of all: This topic is not to bash at the Western man, at all.

Ok, what I wonder:

In the last month I was in Asia I spent a couple of days with Philipinos and an Indonesian guy.

They were both considerate and treated me like their sister. They never asked me something sexual or even flirt with me.

I also met men from mostly Europe, from 23-70, and they were the opposite. They asked me quite personal stuff, trying to find out if I was lonely and needed a man. Making sexually oriented comments/jokes which made me feel nervous and tired. They liked to talk about -sex-.

Of course I shouldn't generalize, men are men, no matter where they are from. But I noticed the difference and I'd like to hear some sounds from different perspectives (especially from women)

My relationships were with great Western men, and my best male friends are from the West, so no frustrations on that part at all.

sex is not an issue if your not getting any- thats BS -

I get plenty, far, far too much, and I still ain't tired of it..kinda wish I was sometimes... reckon when I die I would of spend at least 2 years inside a woman. I think I may be addicted......I ain't going for treatment

I have 5 drop dead lovely ladys on call, all on sponership of coures, this is thailand, I do not kid myself that they either like me nor care about me- nor do I care.Obviously all asian ( thai, japanese, phillipno) no western woman in her right mind would date a guy like me

on a plane back to greece I was asked why I love thailand so much

my answer was

'where else can one buy a woman for the same price as a big mac"

for men like me- this place is paradise, one is constantly bombarded with drop dead lovelys who will glady introduce you to thailands best resource at a drop of a hat,

when it is this easy men like me, of which there are so many, become focused on it-its always there

do you know how unsatisfying most western men sex lifes are- same woman, one you have to talk to, share with, discusss issues!

Oh my God...... a nightmare

its funny, because although I do enjoy myself far too much there is part of me that kinda knows something is not quite right

young women should really have to be selling themselves in this way in order to eat and live in this day and age

but until things change- I will help increase their lot at the grassroots level

by the way, i find asian ladys far more sexual once they have let their hair down than western ones. I iused to go to certain partys before someone decided to try and ban them, the wild ones were usually the asian ones

[Texpat]

I'm a western man.

Nine days out of ten I'm unashamedly hornier than a three-fisted monkey.

The OP has a valid point.

Edited July 1, 2009 by Texpat

[Datsun240Z]

Porn is everywhere, the newer generations girls in the west are more easier and opener towards sex. You go to the Spanish Costas for instance!! I love the Thai woman for their sexual drift, they really like to have sex!

[MrHammer]

First of all: This topic is not to bash at the Western man, at all.

Ok, what I wonder:

In the last month I was in Asia I spent a couple of days with Philipinos and an Indonesian guy.

They were both considerate and treated me like their sister. They never asked me something sexual or even flirt with me.

I also met men from mostly Europe, from 23-70, and they were the opposite. They asked me quite personal stuff, trying to find out if I was lonely and needed a man. Making sexually oriented comments/jokes which made me feel nervous and tired. They liked to talk about -sex-.

Of course I shouldn't generalize, men are men, no matter where they are from. But I noticed the difference and I'd like to hear some sounds from different perspectives (especially from women)

My relationships were with great Western men, and my best male friends are from the West, so no frustrations on that part at all.

This is funny!

Did you ever consider:

You are not that attractive to Asian men?

Asian men are attracted to you, but to shy to do something about it?

Western women appreciate sexually forward men?

[manuchaomk]

First of all: This topic is not to bash at the Western man, at all.

Ok, what I wonder:

In the last month I was in Asia I spent a couple of days with Philipinos and an Indonesian guy.

They were both considerate and treated me like their sister. They never asked me something sexual or even flirt with me.

I also met men from mostly Europe, from 23-70, and they were the opposite. They asked me quite personal stuff, trying to find out if I was lonely and needed a man. Making sexually oriented comments/jokes which made me feel nervous and tired. They liked to talk about -sex-.

Of course I shouldn't generalize, men are men, no matter where they are from. But I noticed the difference and I'd like to hear some sounds from different perspectives (especially from women)

My relationships were with great Western men, and my best male friends are from the West, so no frustrations on that part at all.

....it seems you didn't see nothing...during your travels....

...may I ask you what's the difference between a western men that have a holiday in Greece and a western men that have holiday/travels in the Philippine or Thailand or ...?

...NO DIFFERENCE....it's obviously one of the holidays missions for every man in holiday is...talking, socializing and "promote" some holiday souvenirs.....or hot talks...

...And it's obvious that our sweet & wonderful western women do the same.....

....

[IanForbes]

IanForbes:

"Men who have a lot of experience with women act in a self confident way and most women find that attractive. Many women like the "bad boy" image that some men portray and it attracts them like a bee to honey."

...nothing attractive about a man who's had numerous of different women...bweeh..

Can we generalise that Westerners are more exhibitionists and Asians more voyeurs?

You can't generalize anything at all. All men in general are more voyeuristic than women. I don't see any difference in regards to nationality or ethnic group when it comes to how they view women. If anything it is women that are exhibitionists more than men.

Your comment on what I said tells me you have a very biased personal viewpoint on what YOU find attractive. I'm speaking from many years of observing how thousands of different women react to men. I can't say I've EVER met a woman who wasn't more attracted to confident, take charge, type men than shy ones. Looks are only part of the package. I've known many men who are visually unattractive, but were women magnets because of their confident personality.

[Soulwy]

First of all: This topic is not to bash at the Western man, at all.

Ok, what I wonder:

In the last month I was in Asia I spent a couple of days with Philipinos and an Indonesian guy.

They were both considerate and treated me like their sister. They never asked me something sexual or even flirt with me.

I also met men from mostly Europe, from 23-70, and they were the opposite. They asked me quite personal stuff, trying to find out if I was lonely and needed a man. Making sexually oriented comments/jokes which made me feel nervous and tired. They liked to talk about -sex-.

Of course I shouldn't generalize, men are men, no matter where they are from. But I noticed the difference and I'd like to hear some sounds from different perspectives (especially from women)

My relationships were with great Western men, and my best male friends are from the West, so no frustrations on that part at all.

....it seems you didn't see nothing...during your travels....

...may I ask you what's the difference between a western men that have a holiday in Greece and a western men that have holiday/travels in the Philippine or Thailand or ...?

...NO DIFFERENCE....it's obviously one of the holidays missions for every man in holiday is...talking, socializing and "promote" some holiday souvenirs.....or hot talks...

...And it's obvious that our sweet & wonderful western women do the same.....

....

There is this difference of strategy, that is the general outcome of the posts (to me)

IanForbes: I think women are more voyeuristic than men, men expose themselves easier, literally and figuratively. I just wonder if you could say that Asian men are more voyeuristic than Western men as well, because their way of (not) expressing. Just enjoying silently.

Edited July 1, 2009 by Soulwy

[t.s]

IanForbes:

"Men who have a lot of experience with women act in a self confident way and most women find that attractive. Many women like the "bad boy" image that some men portray and it attracts them like a bee to honey."

...nothing attractive about a man who's had numerous of different women...bweeh..

Can we generalise that Westerners are more exhibitionists and Asians more voyeurs?

You can't generalize anything at all. All men in general are more voyeuristic than women. I don't see any difference in regards to nationality or ethnic group when it comes to how they view women. If anything it is women that are exhibitionists more than men.

Your comment on what I said tells me you have a very biased personal viewpoint on what YOU find attractive. I'm speaking from many years of observing how thousands of different women react to men. I can't say I've EVER met a woman who wasn't more attracted to confident, take charge, type men than shy ones. Looks are only part of the package. I've known many men who are visually unattractive, but were women magnets because of their confident personality.

i reckon you both mixing terms, but perhaps if we were talking about extroverts and introverts rather than exhibitionists and voyueurs, S might be closer to the mark.

voyeurism is a different story, in my experience women have the edge, but then i am speaking out of the bar context. women have much richer fantasies.

by the way, he said "men who have had alot of experience with women" not "men who have had alot of women", there is a distinction.

Edited July 1, 2009 by t.s

[Soulwy]

IanForbes:

"Men who have a lot of experience with women act in a self confident way and most women find that attractive. Many women like the "bad boy" image that some men portray and it attracts them like a bee to honey."

...nothing attractive about a man who's had numerous of different women...bweeh..

Can we generalise that Westerners are more exhibitionists and Asians more voyeurs?

You can't generalize anything at all. All men in general are more voyeuristic than women. I don't see any difference in regards to nationality or ethnic group when it comes to how they view women. If anything it is women that are exhibitionists more than men.

Your comment on what I said tells me you have a very biased personal viewpoint on what YOU find attractive. I'm speaking from many years of observing how thousands of different women react to men. I can't say I've EVER met a woman who wasn't more attracted to confident, take charge, type men than shy ones. Looks are only part of the package. I've known many men who are visually unattractive, but were women magnets because of their confident personality.

i reckon you both mixing terms, but perhaps if we were talking about extroverts and introverts rather than exhibitionists and voyueurs, S might be closer to the mark.

voyeurism is a different story, in my experience women have the edge, but then i am speaking out of the bar context. women have much richer fantasies.

by the way, he said "men who have had alot of experience with women" not "men who have had alot of women", there is a distinction.

You are a serious reader, good... thank you.

[snowflake]

It might be that the Asian people just have to much respect for you, you are white I presume... Then that is something for the upper class... Not for the local "hero"...

Someone talked about the Beach boys on any Kho... Well they are used to half naked white girls to drunk to say no all the time... They know what to do and the girls come here for that, the cute native guy on the beach!

Asian men likes sex just as much as westeners do, but they have their own rituals... They tend to go to the massage parlour after dinner every day (with a happy ending)... All Thai men I know are butterflies...

Now, westerners has no respect from you, they will talk to you in a different way, English people and French people especially (my experience)... You might have sent out some signals to them...

I think men are men and we think the same, hot girl, we want to have sex! Growing up in different cultures just makes us talk and behave differently... That does not mean we do not think alike!

[cpofc]

I don't know about you blokes, but I am left wondering just who the voyeur is here?

if you get my drift.

[IanForbes]

by the way, he said "men who have had alot of experience with women" not "men who have had alot of women", there is a distinction.

You caught my exact meaning, t.s.

However, having a lot of experience with women would probably also mean the experienced man also had intimate relationships with many women. But, that's not always the case. A Catholic priest might have had a lot of experience with women through talking with them and yet never had sex with any of them.

I'm just pointing out the fact that confident, extrovert males are more likely to have success with women than shy introverts. It might not be the case 100% of the time, but certainly in the majority of cases.

[Dakhar]

did the OP ever see a key chain of a Thai guy.... often times there will be a wooden p3nis attached to the keys chain....

Then we have the most densley populated areas of the world.... all Asian

I have a LK friend living in Thailand, and that guy has more sex than I ever thought possible, and this is without a pay for service program.

I think as many have stated, men are men, and thethe crave or instinct to populate the earth is very strong.

Or maybe the OP body type is unatractive to Asian men, where as she was found attractive to Euro men. I know I find a lot of the Thai "rejects" to be attractive.

Ask a Thai Guy about Halle Bary and they would say.... ""Yuck she is toooooooo dark"

WHile I think, I would love to .......... Halle because she is one fine piece of ......... and then while........... her, She would call her sister and ........

Heck write a novel about that encounter.

[a2396]

Many of the foreign men in Thailand are here for sexual adventures, which are not available or are to costly in their own country and maybe they think other Asian countries are the same as Thailand (which they are not). They think all Asia is a sexual candy store and you are the next raspberry tart. These sexual tourists are not exactly a picture of charm & diplomacy either. On the other hand, I have heard my GF complain about similar behavior from younger Thai men.

[Soulwy]

did the OP ever see a key chain of a Thai guy.... often times there will be a wooden p3nis attached to the keys chain....

The Fallus is a symbol for fertility, like in Portugal, In June they sell cookies in the shape of a fallus, so I am not sure if a wooden Fallus is sign of a sex driven person. Yep, Fallus with a capital F...

It might be that the Asian people just have to much respect for you, you are white I presume... Then that is something for the upper class... Not for the local "hero"...

...

not think alike!

Now Snowflake, wow...I forgot this aspect, this says it all. I am not white but caramel...I stepped over this crucial factor. Besides the fact that Asian men have an other "hunting" strategy (or were just not interested in me sexually) the skin colour was maybe, probably more appealing to Westerners than to Asians.

[mahtin]

Yep, Fallus with a capital F...

Sort of like Phuket?

[Dakhar]

symbol of fertility....

and that would include sex, because in order to fertalize, one would need to have "sex"

just a guess on my part

Edited July 3, 2009 by Dakhar

[ballpoint]

symbol of fertility....

and that would include sex, because in order to fertalize, one would need to have "sex"

just a guess on my part

Not necessarily. Many things are fertilised with bullshit. Just look in the garden, and a lot of the threads on this forum. I will admit that the bullshit is often the means of getting the sex though.

[bkkjames]

symbol of fertility....

and that would include sex, because in order to fertalize, one would need to have "sex"

just a guess on my part

Not necessarily. Many things are fertilised with bullshit. Just look in the garden, and a lot of the threads on this forum. I will admit that the bullshit is often the means of getting the sex though.

That's why it's better to just come out and say it "I wanna bang you". No need for bs, sweet talk, holding hands and so on.

I like the male lion's approach to things. A pride full of females that do all the hunting and child raising while he just sits back, looks good and fights off the odd challenger now and again.