Why Are Westerners (men) So Focused On Sex?

[TAWP]

I wouldn't say western men are more focused on sex than asian women...

I have however a very limited experience with asian men, for various reasons.

[IanForbes]

symbol of fertility....

and that would include sex, because in order to fertalize, one would need to have "sex"

just a guess on my part

Not necessarily. Many things are fertilised with bullshit. Just look in the garden, and a lot of the threads on this forum. I will admit that the bullshit is often the means of getting the sex though.

Thanks for the laugh, Ballpoint. Oh so true on so many different levels. Which all goes back to what I said about confident, self assured men getting more than their share when the shy guys are striking out.

That is why bkkjames reply... Quote: "That's why it's better to just come out and say it "I wanna bang you". No need for bs, sweet talk, holding hands and so on." holds some merit. It all depends on how one phrases their comment.

[bkkjames]

symbol of fertility....

and that would include sex, because in order to fertalize, one would need to have "sex"

just a guess on my part

Not necessarily. Many things are fertilised with bullshit. Just look in the garden, and a lot of the threads on this forum. I will admit that the bullshit is often the means of getting the sex though.

Thanks for the laugh, Ballpoint. Oh so true on so many different levels. Which all goes back to what I said about confident, self assured men getting more than their share when the shy guys are striking out.

That is why bkkjames reply... Quote: "That's why it's better to just come out and say it "I wanna bang you". No need for bs, sweet talk, holding hands and so on." holds some merit. It all depends on how one phrases their comment.

thanks for the compliment Ian, I guess? they say the way to a man's heart is through his belly, while the way to a woman's privates is through Gin and Tonic.

Personally, a very gentle touch alongside the back of a gal's neck below her ear is enough to get my attention.

[Bagwan]

I can assure any young lady who complains about being frequently approached by men who 'only want one thing,' that they will be more than a tad frustrated when the compliments dry up. When we hold a morlam party at my upcountry place most of the village attends and there isn't one old dear who doesn't grab me by the lower band (for the benefit of those who know nothing about big guns that does not mean my todger) and drags me off to dance. It has been my experience that even old crones get a charge out of being chatted up. Women even into their old age like to feel that they are sexually attractive. So do men somebody will add!

Oops for big guns read artillery. Wouldn't want to give the wrong impression.

[eek]

I can assure any young lady who complains about being frequently approached by men who 'only want one thing,' that they will be more than a tad frustrated when the compliments dry up. When we hold a morlam party at my upcountry place most of the village attends and there isn't one old dear who doesn't grab me by the lower band (for the benefit of those who know nothing about big guns that does not mean my todger) and drags me off to dance. It has been my experience that even old crones get a charge out of being chatted up. Women even into their old age like to feel that they are sexually attractive. So do men somebody will add!

Oops for big guns read artillery. Wouldn't want to give the wrong impression.

haha! Reminds me of a conversation i had with some girl friends about builders (in the UK). That, they make us feel sick when they call out to us, wolf-whistle and stuff, but its really worrying too when they dont! Its like..wah??? what happened to me today? Im not attractive?!!

But..although you are correct in that i imagine most women would not like men to stop approaching and complimenting them, there is quite a difference between respectful flirtatious comments and overtly sexual ones. I would much rather have a man tell me that he thinks i am beautiful, than saying "nice tits luv"!

[jackdanielsesq]

I know a bunch of Western Women who are all real horny, all the time!!

Maybe its in the protein/testosterone we eat.

BR>Jack

[IanForbes]

haha! Reminds me of a conversation i had with some girl friends about builders (in the UK). That, they make us feel sick when they call out to us, wolf-whistle and stuff, but its really worrying too when they dont! Its like..wah??? what happened to me today? Im not attractive?!!

But..although you are correct in that i imagine most women would not like men to stop approaching and complimenting them, there is quite a difference between respectful flirtatious comments and overtly sexual ones. I would much rather have a man tell me that he thinks i am beautiful, than saying "nice tits luv"!

You pretty much nailed it, eek, as you usually do. It's not so much what a man says as how he says it. And, a handsome young guy is going to get away with much more than some old perv.

However, even some of us old farts can get away with comments that might get other guys slapped if we approach the right woman properly. I talk to strangers everywhere, and I'll compliment women if they are wearing a lovely outfit. But, I make sure that they understand I'm not "hitting" on them or expect anything in return. Sometimes I get surprised looks, but very often that is followed up with a smile and a thank you.

[robblok]

Q: Why Are Westerners (men) So Focused On Sex?

A: Just lucky i guess.

[Pierrot]

Sorry, don't have the time to read the entire thread, so maybe someone says it before.

Anyway, trust the French to state the obvious :

"There is always a need for intoxication: China has opium, Islam has hashish, the West has woman."

A. Malraux

[Soulwy]

Thanks to all of you for posting. It was interesting and entertaining (funny and nostalgic ;-) to read your texts and above all...my question has been answered!

Edited July 5, 2009 by Soulwy

[mahtin]

"There is always a need for intoxication: China has opium, Islam has hashish, the West has woman."

A. Malraux

"It is unthinkable for a Frenchman to arrive at middle age without having syphilis and the Cross of the Legion of Honour."

A. Gide

[jackdanielsesq]

Mostly they have lost the cross.

BR>Jack

"It is unthinkable for a Frenchman to arrive at middle age without having syphilis and the Cross of the Legion of Honour."

[cdnvic]

i love stereotypes. hang on, let me go ask my wife what's wrong with me...

The first rule of a successful marriage is to never ask that question.

[BigSnake]

Don't or can't get enough in the West.

[delmersomsri]

First of all: This topic is not to bash at the Western man, at all.

Ok, what I wonder:

In the last month I was in Asia I spent a couple of days with Philipinos and an Indonesian guy.

They were both considerate and treated me like their sister. They never asked me something sexual or even flirt with me.

I also met men from mostly Europe, from 23-70, and they were the opposite. They asked me quite personal stuff, trying to find out if I was lonely and needed a man. Making sexually oriented comments/jokes which made me feel nervous and tired. They liked to talk about -sex-.

Of course I shouldn't generalize, men are men, no matter where they are from. But I noticed the difference and I'd like to hear some sounds from different perspectives (especially from women)

My relationships were with great Western men, and my best male friends are from the West, so no frustrations on that part at all.

According to a science survey paid for by tax payers money men have sexual thoughts every few seconds. SECONDS, NOT MINUTES, or HOURS, or DAYS. I was amazed myself! Don't think for a minute that those Phillipinos and Indonesians were any different. They were more suttle. Just the nature of the beast. Hopefully men will treat you with respect and not put you into an uncomfortable situation.

[Bagwan]

Hopefully men will treat you with respect and not put you into an uncomfortable situation.

Is missionary or doggie OK?

Sorry, the child inside me couldn't resist it.

[ThaiBasil]

There is a mistake in your topic title:

Why Are Westerners (men) So Focused On Sex?

This is the correct one:

Why Are men So Focused On Sex?

Oh and on-topic: I met more Thai man cheating and flirting with other women than I did back home. So I guess if you lock it up and are not open about the subject, men probably cross the line easier to get some!

[Bagwan]

That's why it's better to just come out and say it "I wanna bang you". No need for bs, sweet talk, holding hands and so on.

About 60 years ago I read the results of a survey carried out in London. It was stated that if a reasonable looking guy stood on a corner of Oxford Street and asked every woman if they would shag him for £10 then two out of every ten would agree. I don't know what this means, but I have never forgotten it.

My memory tells me that £10 was then the average monthly wage.

[ThaiBasil]

That's why it's better to just come out and say it "I wanna bang you". No need for bs, sweet talk, holding hands and so on.

About 60 years ago I read the results of a survey carried out in London. It was stated that if a reasonable looking guy stood on a corner of Oxford Street and asked every woman if they would shag him for £10 then two out of every ten would agree. I don't know what this means, but I have never forgotten it.

My memory tells me that £10 was then the average monthly wage.

Similar thing was on tv in Holland. A tv-show host just went to the local shopping area asking every woman in the camera if she would have sex with him (he was just a regular guy, not that handsome) and many actually wanted to sleep with him.

[DaleBlue]

Not true. I find Thai men are equally focused on the same thing.

Only if God make women first, we would have been the dominant sex. However, what's done is done, so I suppose we just have to live with God's mistake.

[Vang2x]

First of all: This topic is not to bash at the Western man, at all.

Ok, what I wonder:

In the last month I was in Asia I spent a couple of days with Philipinos and an Indonesian guy.

They were both considerate and treated me like their sister. They never asked me something sexual or even flirt with me.

I also met men from mostly Europe, from 23-70, and they were the opposite. They asked me quite personal stuff, trying to find out if I was lonely and needed a man. Making sexually oriented comments/jokes which made me feel nervous and tired. They liked to talk about -sex-.

Of course I shouldn't generalize, men are men, no matter where they are from. But I noticed the difference and I'd like to hear some sounds from different perspectives (especially from women)

My relationships were with great Western men, and my best male friends are from the West, so no frustrations on that part at all.

Hmmm...... a lot could be the probable reasons such as:

1. They can't think of any better subjects for basic conversations.

2. Western countries are open to the topic while Asians aren't really vocal about it.

3. That's what they're here for.

4. They are sexually deprived or dissatisfied.

5. They can't afford to get a BG at least for 1k plus the HIV infection possiblity.

6. Perhaps getting laid for free is a wise option.

7. It's their insecurity. COuld be talking about it means bragging about their skills.

8. They think it's the way of luring a girl similar with that's what charms them to anyone wearing skirts and not just women, I mean.

9. They are incapable of the action so they just settle for the "talk" and satisified with it.

10. They think the person they are talking with have the same mind.

11. They think that makes them attractive.

12. Desperate

13. Trying Hard

14. Idio*

15. Mo**on

16. Bored

17. Effect of watching too much porn or engaging in er*tic chats.

18. Just being cool.

19. Just having fun with you and not really taking the subject seriously.

20. Just being friendly and taking things light. After all life is a humor, without it, we would all die earlier.

[Bagwan]

Only if God make women first, we would have been the dominant sex.

Some women think that they are in which case they have lost the opportunity of a lifetime and the chance to have something to tell their grandchildren about - being bedded by me.

I had the nerve to tell a miserable, fussy, overweight, lady Police Captain in Immigration that she was a kiborn. Her colleagues nearby burst into laughter and enjoyed the joke. She had no option but to join in. I returned half an hour later and presented her with a small box of chocolates. Was she ever so coy? I did wonder if she had ever experienced that before.

[marsteele]

Maybe it stems from the image that these western men get of Thailand because of some of places in Thailand that survive on the sex tourism. A lot of western men come to thailand for just one thing and think that all thai women are the same and work in the sex industry. But not all men think this way.

[Longbow212]

Many western men are conditioned by society to think that sex and beautiful women are a priority. Women use this mens desire as a weapon against them carrot and stick style empowering them regardless of their inner intelect or personal qualities .... I have never heard a women complaining because she got a job because she was attractive, conversly its very common to hear a woman complain of advances by men (even so much as a starting a polite conversation in a bar) because they are of no advantage to her.

One thing I like over here is that western women cannot use sex to get what they want anyway near as effectively as in the west. They are lost without this power and have to accept that they have to rely on their personal qualities for employment or meeting men. I have noticed a distinct difference in attitude here of western women, back home they are much more aloof and unapproachable (so many times turning and sticking their nose in the air upon any attempt to start a polite conversation) demanding a man jump through hoops to maintain her affections. over here they are humbled by the sheer beauty, warmth and sincereity of (most) thai women.... they are so much more approachable here than back home.

I think the OP was just unlucky in meeting sleazy men. Maybe next week she will experience the opposite... either way it is worth remembering asian men are not brainwashed as western men are over sex...

[chiangmaibruce]

One thing I like over here is that western women cannot use sex to get what they want anyway near as effectively as in the west. They are lost without this power and have to accept that they have to rely on their personal qualities for employment or meeting men. I have noticed a distinct difference in attitude here of western women, back home they are much more aloof and unapproachable (so many times turning and sticking their nose in the air upon any attempt to start a polite conversation) demanding a man jump through hoops to maintain her affections. over here they are humbled by the sheer beauty, warmth and sincereity of (most) thai women.... they are so much more approachable here than back home.

I think that's an accurate observation, and diplomatically stated. The shoe IS on the other foot here, and I think that reality probably hits home quite quickly after arrival. I mean where else in the world do you see so many single (farang) women sitting alone in cafes reading books? I suspect it is certainly one reason for the imbalance in male/female visitors to Thailand (and particularly in terms of repeat visitors).

Edited July 19, 2009 by chiangmaibruce

[bodypaul]

About 60 years ago I read the results of a survey carried out in London. It was stated that if a reasonable looking guy stood on a corner of Oxford Street and asked every woman if they would shag him for £10 then two out of every ten would agree. I don't know what this means, but I have never forgotten it.

My memory tells me that £10 was then the average monthly wage.

Well nowadays 8 out of 10 wouldn't understand English there!!

[ham]

Many of the Western men who come to Thailand have a higher sex-drive than average - they know that Thailand is a cheap place for sex so they come here. What you see is an unrepresentative sample of Western men. I don't know whether the same theory holds good for Asian men coming to Thailand.

No value judgements intended!

and you realy think that the "asian man" don't know this? And of coarse they just want to talk

The biggest group of tourists comes from Asia. Little difference, we the Westerners can easier speak about sex I guess.

[eek]

One thing I like over here is that western women cannot use sex to get what they want anyway near as effectively as in the west. They are lost without this power and have to accept that they have to rely on their personal qualities for employment or meeting men. I have noticed a distinct difference in attitude here of western women, back home they are much more aloof and unapproachable (so many times turning and sticking their nose in the air upon any attempt to start a polite conversation) demanding a man jump through hoops to maintain her affections. over here they are humbled by the sheer beauty, warmth and sincereity of (most) thai women.... they are so much more approachable here than back home.

I think that's an accurate observation, and diplomatically stated. The shoe IS on the other foot here, and I think that reality probably hits home quite quickly after arrival. I mean where else in the world do you see so many single (farang) women sitting alone in cafes reading books? I suspect it is certainly one reason for the imbalance in male/female visitors to Thailand (and particularly in terms of repeat visitors).

I came to Thailand for many reasons, not one of them was to look for a man. If I (and i imagine same for many other women) am sitting alone in a cafe its by choice. Usually i will take a book with me when i dont want to be bothered by other people (books are not only a great read, but also useful for sending out a do not disturb signal). Ive still been approached many times in Thailand by men. Of course not to the same degree, but i imagine thats due to many of the western men here being interested in the beauty of Thai ladies, and often the reason they choose to come here, so im not their 'cup of tea' anyway. Also some of those men are not the men I would date per say either. I like the fact im not hit on as much (not that im saying i am incredibly hot or anything or was constantly hounded in the west!). But then again i also dont go out to pubs or clubs, where there are more opportunities to meet men. As im in a relationship and dont need to get an ego boost, i dont feel im losing out in any way by not 'hanging out'. One of the things that appeals to me in Thailand is being able to walk down the street without lame cat calls and go out to places without cheesy chat up lines. Attention from men in the west isnt all its cracked up to be. Some attention isnt desirable. Might be worth noting that some of the women who choose to stay long term or settle in Thailand, actually enjoy unwanted advances.

[carlosacao]

First of all: This topic is not to bash at the Western man, at all.

Ok, what I wonder:

In the last month I was in Asia I spent a couple of days with Philipinos and an Indonesian guy.

They were both considerate and treated me like their sister. They never asked me something sexual or even flirt with me.

I also met men from mostly Europe, from 23-70, and they were the opposite. They asked me quite personal stuff, trying to find out if I was lonely and needed a man. Making sexually oriented comments/jokes which made me feel nervous and tired. They liked to talk about -sex-.

Of course I shouldn't generalize, men are men, no matter where they are from. But I noticed the difference and I'd like to hear some sounds from different perspectives (especially from women)

My relationships were with great Western men, and my best male friends are from the West, so no frustrations on that part at all.

I think both western and asian men have a very similar interest in sex but they express it in different ways and with significant cultural differences, asian men are not so open about it and there is always the shyness and language factor when dealing with western women, but I would also add that culturally, asian men (and also from some other non asian cultures) are more open to friendship with women in ways that don't involve sexual interest than anglo saxon countries in my opinion. I've clearly noticed that difference myself from my home country, Spain and later living in USA where many interactions between men and women were considered dating, while in Spain many people often do the same things just as friendship without thinking anything else.

[robitusson]

OP, sounds like you are looking for attention?

Apparently so.