How Much Should I Pay?

[johnh101]

Please just be careful and don't jump in to quickly and lose your lot. The guys above have told you how much and they are generally fair to generous.

But you sound like you need to learn more about the Thai ways. I would recommend you buy a book called Thailand Fever which is a guide to the differng cultures and explains a whole lot I guarantee you do not know.

Good Luck.

[SEAtramp]

I would recommend you buy a book called Thailand Fever which is a guide to the differng cultures and explains a whole lot I guarantee you do not know.

Sorry but i've got visions of this guy reading this book while posting money to her. Sort of like a DIY manual for serviceing tee ruks.

[otherstuff1957]

As others have pointed out - it's not about how much she needs, it's all about how much her family needs! She'll be losing big face if she marries a farang and then can't help cousin Noi with her new business, sister Nui with her University fees, Uncle Som with his overdue mortgage, etc... etc...

Do what I did - Marry an orphan . At least one generation of hanger's on are Buddha's problem now.

[toastwars]

I see you lot are in full anal mode again, bunch of stiff assed humourless doltards. If a guy wants to post his intentions to live with an ex hooker and you lot all jump to his defence when the actual reality of the situation is pointed out to him then you are all doing him a massive disservice, not helping. I know most of you find getting a decent girl difficult but it still does not change the fact that your chosen mode of sexual gratification has to be paid for. Burr I pay for the room that I need i don't have to impress anyone. I thought bar girl threads were the domain of bg.com. Like I said I wil let you know if I find any Cinderellas down Liverpool docks next time I am in the area

Edited March 21, 2005 by toastwars

[toastwars]

When has Toastwars ever made a constructive comment? Mostly anti-American, anti-bar-girl rants. Calls people losers yet is surviving in a 1800 bht per month room? Ignore him Maxcherry, most other people do.

Like you do?

BTW it's Hugh Pugh Barney McGrew......If you are going to quote something in your signature at least get the quote right

[TizMe]

Without passing any judgment, it depends...

Just have a read of the "How much does it cost to live in Thailand thread" shows that it can range from about 4,000 baht upto 200,000 baht per month.

So, how much to send her? Yes she could survive if you send her 4,000 per month. But considering that she probably became a BG because she thought that earning 4,000 baht per month up-country as an unskilled worker was insufficient I doubt that she will be happy with that amount.

So how much more can you afford?

I see that it mostly depends on your capacity to pay. How much do you have left over from your pay packet after all your expenses? If its only say 12,000 baht then you would be mad to be sending 10,000 of it to her. On the other hand, if the figure is 200,000 baht then I'm sure that you could afford to be much more generous.

But, it also depends on what her spending capacity has inceased to in the time that she has been a BG. If she finds that she can no longer purchase all the things that she is used to, then she will see this move as a step backwards, and may be tempted to earn a few baht on the side.

[meemiathai]

Never worry about insulting her, she is a bar girl and anything you do for her is generous. If she ever fails fo appreciate that fact she aint worth it.

results in

there is a near zero chance it will work out anyway.

Only if you can understand that, Max, will there be any success in your relationship!

KL, you are a model of a gentleman!

Wonder if you are overaged, ugly, handicapped or whatever. Because then we can say anything others do for you is generous!

And pls don't do anything for me! I don't need your <removed> generosity!

And for RDN, , if the discussion does end after

How much do you need? "Up to you...", 

I guess most here know what results would be.

[meemiathai]

I see you lot are in full anal mode again, bunch of stiff assed humourless doltards. If a guy wants to post his intentions to live with an ex hooker and you lot all jump to his defence when the actual reality of the situation is pointed out to him then you are all doing him a massive disservice, not helping. I know most of you find getting a decent girl difficult but it still does not change the fact that your chosen mode of sexual gratification has to be paid for. Burr I pay for the room that I need i don't have to impress anyone. I thought bar girl threads were the domain of bg.com. Like I said I wil let you know if I find any Cinderellas down Liverpool docks next time I am in the area

The inferiority and inconfidence in you is making you who you are.

[Khun Larry]

KL, you are a model of a gentleman!

Wonder if you are overaged, ugly, handicapped or whatever.  Because then we can say anything others do for you is generous!

And pls don't do anything for me! I don't need your <removed> generosity!

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

What is your point? Did you marry a BG or something?

[meemiathai]

Max,

Money can only get you a pet.

If you want a caring partner, you need a heart.

But of course you always have to be careful about yourself, irrespective of a bargirl of a nice girl.

[Jai Dee]

But considering that she probably became a BG because she thought that earning 4,000 baht per month up-country as an unskilled worker was insufficient I doubt that she will be happy with that amount.

Good point TizMe, and one that most posters have overlooked.

How much was her "salary" and how much did she get from "tips" and "going with customers"?

That plus a bit is likely to be closer to the figure she is going to be happy to accept.

[toastwars]

I speak the facts, the man is moving in with a (possibly) ex prostitute if thats his bag, having a gf who speaks and swears like a trooper, have the community where he lives constantly discussing their relationship, run the very real risk of having everything he buys for the house stolen when she realises that keeping house for him pays only a fraction of what she made on her back then carry on encouraging him.

I fail to see how that makes me eel inferior or reduces my confience, perhaps you could enlighten measuming that you have the mythical oracle properties that you purport to have concidering you have never met me.

If you want to spend your time with bar girls then it is up to you but get over yourself they don't need saving you are just another in a long line of business transactions and this is for discussion on bg.com not here

[toastwars]

KL, you are a model of a gentleman!

Wonder if you are overaged, ugly, handicapped or whatever.  Because then we can say anything others do for you is generous!

And pls don't do anything for me! I don't need your &lt;removed&gt; generosity!

What is your point? Did you marry a BG or something?

Probably and he thinks he saved her! they always get defensive and insecure when you point out their failure to be able to attract any woman who thinks further than the contents of their wallets.

[meemiathai]

KL, you are a model of a gentleman!

Wonder if you are overaged, ugly, handicapped or whatever.  Because then we can say anything others do for you is generous!

And pls don't do anything for me! I don't need your &lt;removed&gt; generosity!

What is your point? Did you marry a BG or something?

Probably and he thinks he saved her! they always get defensive and insecure when you point out their failure to be able to attract any woman who thinks further than the contents of their wallets.

I'm obviously living in a bigger world than yours!

[toastwars]

yeah I don't let prostitutes into mine, it saves room

[Dragonman]

Don't get why this guy simply asks for advice and is lectured to by various factions of the Moral Minority. If anyone think that Thai non BG's, or female falangs for that matter, are not as into money as the average BG they are either extremely young or have been living in a monastery.

My humble opinion without the chastisement and moralising would be give her 10000 -12000 baht as this is a good Thai salary.If she really cares for you this will be ample.If it's not enough think carefully about the future. Good Luck.

[Sir Burr]

BTW it's Hugh Pugh Barney McGrew......If you are going to quote something in your signature at least get the quote right

It's Pugh, Pugh. They were twins. Do some research first.

[lampard10]

BTW it's Hugh Pugh Barney McGrew......If you are going to quote something in your signature at least get the quote right

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

It's Pugh, Pugh. They were twins. Do some research first.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Children,children. While you two are bickering, Toasties writing the biggest load of &lt;deleted&gt; seen on this post so far. Slag 'im off not each other.

[phuketsiam]

:D

[gburns57au]

My girl is in Bkk not the sticks....she gets 5000-6000 a month...and works with her sister in a market to supplement that....She worked a bar for 18 months all of that time working daytime as a waitress, but she admits she went with some guys. I asked her how much she wanted and she replied 18000 a month....like most girls she lives in hope...lol....I told her then what i would send and she accepted that...she hasnt gone back to work in the bars and seems quite happy with the arrangement.

Previously with my ex wife from a village in Buriram, I sent her the same amount and out of that she had to pay the hire purchase bills of 1760 per month....she was still able to save money. IMHO To send more than 6000 baht to a village girl is too much unless you are building a house or doing some other investing.

[Jack Jones]

Personally wouldn't send money but can understand your reasoning. Thai's can live very cheap up country so 5K would be more than sufficient. Could she not get a regular job to supplement this income? In my experience it's usually the grand mother who looks after the kids during the day anyway.

[Kringle]

Not even going past the first page of this as it's either a troll or the guy needs to wake up. If she is going to wait for you and only you then she doesn't need a lot to stay in the STICKS as you put it. He11 4000 baht a month and she'll be fine. I know women working in Bangkok living there and sending money back home. Granted their style of living is notheing compared to what you or I "might" be used to but you don't give enough info in your original post for most people here to make a rational remark of your situation.

Have a good life and don't fall prey to the "STORIES" of woe and missery.

[taxexile]

amazing how a simple request for advice from someone who feels he has found a suitable partner (who has worked in bars) can elicit such venom from third rate toerags who wish to deny that happiness can ever be found in the arms of a lass who has been around the block a few times.

do you limit your relationships to proven virgins ? , are you saving yourselves for miss right ? what a sad bunch of doomladen , pontificating , misogynistic failures you are.

i suspect your most succesful relationships have been with mrs palm and her 5 daughters.

to the original poster , send her what you are happy sending her , if its right ,its right. if its not , then its not. if its meant to be ,its meant to be.

dont force it.

just go with it.

and dont pay too much attention to anything you read on thai visa. !!

be lucky and be happy.

[Sir Burr]

amazing how a simple request for advice from someone who feels he has found a suitable partner (who has worked in bars) can elicit such venom from third rate toerags who  wish to deny that happiness can ever be found in the arms of a lass who has been around the block a few times.

do you limit your relationships to proven virgins ? , are you saving yourselves for miss right ? what a sad bunch of doomladen , pontificating , misogynistic failures you are.

i suspect your most succesful relationships have been with mrs palm and her 5 daughters.

Great post and good advice. Though, I have a feeling that a lot of these ex-bargirl haters scored a stunning beauty on their first night in LOS. After a wild, enjoyable night they had their fragile egos shattered when the girl asked for money in the morning. I can just imagine it "but....but, I thought you liked me for me...."

[bkkmadness]

yeah I don't let prostitutes into mine, it saves room

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Probably haven't got much room in that 1800 baht appartment

Seriously Toastie, you didn't just point out facts you made derogratory comments about someone who was just asking for advice, who are you to question how good or bad his life is? Your've not exactly 'made it' yet have you. Why don't you chill out, give the guy the advice he needs or stay out of the topic.

One thing I hate about thaivisa is the lack of community that is often apparent here and the bargirl haters, and the people who are content to slag someones wife or gf off without knowing anything about them.

It's a shame that a guy like Maxcherry, who is a newbie to Thailand comes to one of the biggest forums on Thailand and gets abuse in his polite asking for advice posts. I bet the people that dish out that abuse here would never do it face to face with people out of sheer courtesy yet behind the computer they start to be the bully boys.

Edited March 21, 2005 by bkkmadness

[meom]

I agree with RDN.  I live WAY out in the sticks in Isaan.  General cost of living is cheaper here.  I think 4000-10000 is plenty on top of rent. 

Good luck!

Meom- 200,000 a month!?  Can I be your friend???  

Sure honey, I might be in need of a mia noi in future. Kindly send me some pictures after your operation

[Kringle]

Don't know if the latest was pointed at me but doesn't matter. I stand by the point of that YOU didn't give enough info in your op for me to bother with. So many guys come here and figure they have met "Miss Perfect" and want to know "how much to send her" while they are gone. Jeezus H somebody, why are you going to send anything unless you've KNOWN someone for at "least a little bit of time (more than a few days to a week or ten days or whatever your holiday is). How old are you to even ask the question in the first place, second how much do you know of Thai society or the workings therein? Did SHE ask you to send money to her whille you were gone or did you volunteer to send her money to keep her out of the bar?

Good luck with whatever the answers are to these and the thousands of other questions that one could ask of YOUR particular situation.

[maxcherry]

Thanks very much to all the positive posters on here. Some very good appreciated advice and constructive comments.

[Khun Larry]

I'm obviously living in a bigger world than yours!

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Isaan?

It is all relative. So for you it seems bigger.

[RDN]

...i suspect your most succesful relationships have been with mrs palm and her 5 daughters.....

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>