Thai Girlfriends And Their Mothers

[sua yai]

I've been with my gf for 18 months. Most of the time has been really happy. However, we had a falling out around Xmas and she moved out. We patched things up and she moved back in for a month or so.

Her mother is a Mai Chee - Buddhist nun - and she had laid the law down that we must get married. Just the Buddhist ceremony, no big party, but a dowry of 50,000 Baht. When it was explained to me that the money would be going into a bank account for the gf to provide security for her later in life, I was reasonably happy with the situation and agreed.

For the past month, she's been living with her mother on the temple grounds. I visit regularly and the situation is calm. The mother appreciates that it will take me another three months to raise the money - I've got a business back home to take care of as well.

So, yesterday was her 33rd birthday. I bought her some gold, paid for a beauty salon and took her for a meal in the evening. We then had some drinks at a friend's bar. Back to my place and everything was hunky dory until just before 1am. "I've got to go home now. I promised my mother I'd be back by 1am".

Well, I don't know about you lot out there, but I was not too pleased. It's not as if it was the first time we'd been out or that she was a young girl.

I can't see this relationship progressing much further, but any advice would be welcome.

Yours in exasperation. I'm going mad and will now go out and get drunk!!

[taxexile]

when i was "courting" my future wife , after taking her home by taxi she would always tell the taxi driver to take me on to soi cowboy to finish off the evening.

if you have enough feeling and love for her to have planned a marriage , then it seems a bit short sighted of you to abandon it all because she is possibly wanting to be a good respectful daughter in her mothers eyes , who also happens to be a nun.

i see nothing wrong with her behaviour in keeping a promise.

you are asking her to choose between her mother and you.

go the soi cowboy route , and good luck with your wedding.

[Dragonman]

Agree with taxexile. She sounds a good respectful girl. If you really care for her make the effort to get the 50000 baht sooner so you can make an honest woman out of her in her mother' eyes.

If you're thinking of finishing just because she doesn't stay with you all night it doesn't sound as if she is really the girl for you. Wish I could get rid of my wife at 1am every night. Sounds like the perfect relationship.

[aughie]

She probably doesn't wish to treat the monastery like a guesthouse. Can she move in with you again?

[otherstuff1957]

I'd agree with the others here. Her being respectful towards her Buddhist mother isn't unexpected, plus you can still have lot's of fun before 1am!

Another point is that 50K bride price sounds reasonable. It shows that you value her, but it isn't a high "Farang" price. From the sound of things I'd say that there are worse families to marry into than this one!

[sua yai]

Replies appreciated. The reason I've stuck in there for the past month - that's when she moved in with her Mum - is that i do love her. We've been together for 18 months.

[dereklev]

Agree with taxexile. She sounds a good respectful girl. If you really care for her make the effort to get the 50000 baht sooner so you can make an honest woman out of her in her mother' eyes.

If you're thinking of finishing just because she doesn't stay with you all night it doesn't sound as if she is really the girl for you. Wish I could get rid of my wife at 1am every night. Sounds like the perfect relationship.

Agree with you both.

50,000 baht really isn't a fortune! Find it and make her and her mum happy

It would be nice to be able to get rid of the wife at 1am from time to time.

[pedro01]

Agree with taxexile. She sounds a good respectful girl. If you really care for her make the effort to get the 50000 baht sooner so you can make an honest woman out of her in her mother' eyes.

If you're thinking of finishing just because she doesn't stay with you all night it doesn't sound as if she is really the girl for you. Wish I could get rid of my wife at 1am every night. Sounds like the perfect relationship.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I second that (especially about getting the wife to leave at 1am)

[siamesekitty]

Hang in there, it's not that long a wait. And in the meantime, do try your best to be a good prospective son-in-law, and let her be the good daughter she'd like to be in her mother's eyes.

Chances are her mother might have been waiting up for her, many concerned conservative Thai mothers do this, even when their daughters tell them not to.

[Humphrey Bear]

You've got a prospective mother-in-law in a thousand!

Hang on to her!

Most Thai girls (most girls in fact) listen to their mothers more than their boy-friends / husbands. And if mama says she wants ssome money, you'll have no peace until she gets it. My mother-in-law seems to have a recording that goes on every time my wife phones her.

This one is just looking out for her daughter, as she should.

Be happy, you're on a winner.

[ThaiPauly]

I would add that I think you have a one in a million girl there! Hang on in there I believe it will be worth it in the long run.

There have been no negative comments made in this forum, and thats a miricle in itself.

Remember in Soi Cowboy you can get a girl in the sack in ten minutes, I take my hat off to you- you seem to deserve each other and I would say the pointers are to a long and happy marriage

EXCELLENT- well done you

Good Luck

TP

[Simbo]

I cannot believe I reading these posts. How many times has a 30 odd year old been married, how many dowery's have been paid. You obviously aren't happy with your treatment by your possible future wife.

My advise is, cut your losses and get out now. What a boring woman she sounds.

[Dragonman]

Hey Simbo my 33 year old ain't been married before either.

Wives are meant to be good and a bit boring. That's why they invented "mia noi's"

[Neeranam]

I suggest using your remaining single time well.

get out and enjoy yourself and do the things that you won't be able to do after you get married, have kids etc.

As for MILs, I think of a hippo every time I hear mines name. just like Reggie perrin.

50,000 baht is not bad for a dowry, especially if the wife gets it.

Is the mother Chinese?

[chanchao]

1250 US$ for a cryin', talkin', sleepin', walkin' livin' bride... Bargain! She have sisters?

[ThaiPauly]

I cannot believe I reading these posts. How many times has a 30 odd year old been married, how many dowery's have been paid. You obviously aren't happy with your treatment by your possible future wife.

My advise is, cut your losses and get out now. What a boring woman she sounds. 

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

You've got a way with words Simbo have'nt you, there will always be one or two TV members talking horses##t its a pity he just happened to read your post

Ignore him and he might just go AWAY

[aughie]

"She have sisters?"

The question I want answered is can she cook? and do you have any pics of her meals?

[ray23]

Replies appreciated. The reason I've stuck in there for the past month - that's when she moved in with her Mum - is that i do love her. We've been together for 18 months.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Man she owns you already, go pay your dues like the rest of us. Join the club!

[Simbo]

I cannot believe I reading these posts. How many times has a 30 odd year old been married, how many dowery's have been paid. You obviously aren't happy with your treatment by your possible future wife.

My advise is, cut your losses and get out now. What a boring woman she sounds.  

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

You've got a way with words Simbo have'nt you, there will always be one or two TV members talking horses##t its a pity he just happened to read your post

Ignore him and he might just go AWAY

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

reading some of your drivel lately. why don't you go away.

[chuchok]

I cannot believe I reading these posts. How many times has a 30 odd year old been married, how many dowery's have been paid. You obviously aren't happy with your treatment by your possible future wife.

My advise is, cut your losses and get out now. What a boring woman she sounds. 

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Of course you know them both sooooo well.How did you come to the conclusion she is boring?Is it because her mum is a female priest and tries to live a good life?

For all you know she could be a great girl with a fantastic sence of humour.Why don't you jump in with both feet again before you find out all the facts.

[sua yai]

Good replies people.

I've just had another 2 hours with her - celebate - and she's gone back to the temple.

I told her about the decent replies I had earlier on and that I agreed with them.

It made us both happy.

I suppose I'm just going to have to wait. I'm sure it will be worth it.

[sua yai]

Simbo,

You just havn't got a clue, have you?

[Nam Kao]

33 is kinda old, I'd go for a mint 18 y/o

[meom]

I suppose I'm just going to have to wait. I'm sure it will be worth it.

Yeah, heaven is waiting and waiting is ######.

[sua yai]

No. 33 is experienced and no "ties".

And waiting is all about how long she'll wait for me.

[Harmonica]

I would add that I think you have a one in a million girl there! Hang on in there I believe it will be worth it in the long run.

There have been no negative comments made in this forum, and thats a miricle in itself.

Remember in Soi Cowboy you can get a girl in the sack in ten minutes, I take my hat off to you- you seem to deserve each other and I would say the pointers are to a long and happy marriage

EXCELLENT- well done you

Good Luck

TP

>>>>> There have been no negative comments made in this forum, and thats a miricle in itself. <<<<<<

Good stuff ThaiPauly

To sua yai -- I'm with the majority here. You've got a good thing going -- hang in there.

It took me a while to understand the kind of relationship my TG has with her mother -- I've never seen anything like it ever before. But it is based on respect and devotion. I'm not going to argue with that. I'll be 2nd in line -- that's good enough for me -- what's amazing to me is that she (my TG) can take care of both simultaneously without any thought to "ranking" us.

[sua yai]

Well said, Harmonica.

After 7 years of living in this country, some things never cease to "amaze" me.

Live and learn.

[Simbo]

No. 33 is experienced and no "ties".

And waiting is all about how long she'll wait for me.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

What popycock !

[Simbo]

I would add that I think you have a one in a million girl there! Hang on in there I believe it will be worth it in the long run.

There have been no negative comments made in this forum, and thats a miricle in itself.

Remember in Soi Cowboy you can get a girl in the sack in ten minutes, I take my hat off to you- you seem to deserve each other and I would say the pointers are to a long and happy marriage

EXCELLENT- well done you

Good Luck

TP

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

>>>>> There have been no negative comments made in this forum, and thats a miricle in itself. <<<<<<

Good stuff ThaiPauly

To sua yai -- I'm with the majority here. You've got a good thing going -- hang in there.

It took me a while to understand the kind of relationship my TG has with her mother -- I've never seen anything like it ever before. But it is based on respect and devotion. I'm not going to argue with that. I'll be 2nd in line -- that's good enough for me -- what's amazing to me is that she (my TG) can take care of both simultaneously without any thought to "ranking" us.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

[Harmonica]

I would add that I think you have a one in a million girl there! Hang on in there I believe it will be worth it in the long run.

There have been no negative comments made in this forum, and thats a miricle in itself.

Remember in Soi Cowboy you can get a girl in the sack in ten minutes, I take my hat off to you- you seem to deserve each other and I would say the pointers are to a long and happy marriage

EXCELLENT- well done you

Good Luck

TP

>>>>> There have been no negative comments made in this forum, and thats a miricle in itself. <<<<<<

Good stuff ThaiPauly

To sua yai -- I'm with the majority here. You've got a good thing going -- hang in there.

It took me a while to understand the kind of relationship my TG has with her mother -- I've never seen anything like it ever before. But it is based on respect and devotion. I'm not going to argue with that. I'll be 2nd in line -- that's good enough for me -- what's amazing to me is that she (my TG) can take care of both simultaneously without any thought to "ranking" us.

Why?