Thai Expat Arsinization Syndrome

[RueFang]

Briggsy, I'm sorry to say that I feel I have fallen into the category you have so well described.

I am aware of it. I don't like it. In fact it's a bit of an effort at times because it's actually totally against my real character. And I feel slowly overtime it may become pemanent.

There is mainly one reason for it, and that is to ensure people leave me alone. I will innitiate the approach if I want. Contact will be made on my grounds. For examptle, I only talk to Thais outside of my immediate family/work/interest circles only on a needs basis.

I have found that familiarity does in fact breed contempt or an opportunity to be ripped off or give Thais an opportunity to say something inappropriate to me.

It's my barrier, my protection. And, it works.

As I said I don't particularly like it, but it's the way it must be in this part of the world.

I find this quite the eye opener to hear this from an actual self confessed grouch! You say you don't like your behaviour but that's the way it MUST be in Thailand. That is just sad. Really sad. Poor you. Your 'protection' has probably prevented many potential friendships and happy times.

Ask your teerak to get you some of this medicine. I dont know the English name for it but the Thai's call it Mai Ben Rai, and it is available everywhere. It is best taken daily with weekly injections of Thai language lessons. It worked for me.

Great response sgunn65

Actually, its got me wondering if female expats here are generally happier here? Most all that ive met that live here have positive attitudes. Any with less than that, is usually about stuff not specific to Thailand. Maybe because many expat woman that choose to live here came with a different criteria than some of the expat men? Plus of course, there are more expat men than women..so hard to gauge.

So true, eek, it was my first thought when I read the OP. Like attracts like, so I'm glad I've not had to deal with the grouches

[DegenFarang]

May I ask you to each review your last 50 or 100 posts? Have you made mostly helpful comments, cheery remarks? How argumentative are you? Are you grumpy or angry?

Wish I knew how to do this with your forum software. I just know I can click my username and then click posts but that only reveals the last 5-6 posts I've made. I often want to go back and look at prior posts and see if somebody responded (I'll also undertake the exercise you've suggested) - can anybody explain how to go back and look at our prior posts in bulk? I suggest everybody do this and report back the results if you feel comfortable.

[DegenFarang]

"I'm going to have to side with the Tuk Tuk driver on this one, especially if it is true that the guy swore at him and kicked him or even made a motion toward him with his feet, which as we all know is the worst form of insult in Thai culture.

All that over 50 baht ey? Ya it's a scam but it's less than $2 and he should have asked somebody how long it would take. You can never in any business in any country negotiate a price for a service, take that service, then upon completion pay a different price and walk away.

Typical egotistical tourist unaware of Thai culture, thinking he is superior and the small little smiling man in the tuk tuk can't do anything about it. He learned his lesson and hopefully will be more respectful in the future."

(No reference at all to the victim assaulted by 2 Thais - the normal 2 on 1 configuration.)

I find this quote difficult to reconcile with your opening post where you are asking what makes people cynical here.

Given your opinion on the tuk tuk assault can you explain why long-term expats take views like your own.

There are some interesting insights in this thread but I am having difficulty with this one.

caf

When I made the OP I was not finger pointing and claiming that I am perfect. I was simply making an observation about expats in this country (of which I am one) and inviting people to discuss the topic in general terms.

Taking things personally or trying to make this discussion personal is not very constructive and will only derail the topic into a finger pointing, pissing contest, flame war. Let's please not go down that road.

Edited January 7, 2010 by DegenFarang

[ThailandLovr]

Stating the obvious, a person with TEAS is not happy, pure and simple. This could be for reasons discussed here and others not yet mentioned. If an expat's life in Thailand is not fulfilling, for whatever reason, how could he be happy? In fact, unless he could suppress all emotions, how could he not have some degree of TEAS?

For older expats already retired, and facing daily boredom the realization that "this is the way it is going to be from now on (indefinitely)" can be a major downer. Especially after the first couple of year honeymoon with their new life in Thailand has passed. Maybe the new gf/wife isn't quite as exciting as before (boredom in the bedroom). Maybe not being able to identify a hobby similar to one previously had in the West. Maybe feeling trapped here, for any number of reasons and in any number of ways, but feeling unable to make the difficult but necessary changes. Maybe the adjustment to life on a fixed income which allows considerably less free spending. Maybe the boredom has revealed a degree of underlying clinical depression masked by many prior years of stimulating times in one's occupation or otherwise.

There are so many "maybe"s .. endless...and many of them valid sources of TEAS.

I remember reading in the book "West with the Night", the author, Beryl Markham, an aviatrix said "boredom is the worst possible fate" (or something similar) as she complained about cockpit boredom as she flew hour after hour alone. I haven't forgotten her words. Reducing or eliminating boredom, if present, is a must do for all us expats.

Edited January 7, 2010 by ThailandLovr

[DegenFarang]

"I'm going to have to side with the Tuk Tuk driver on this one, especially if it is true that the guy swore at him and kicked him or even made a motion toward him with his feet, which as we all know is the worst form of insult in Thai culture.

All that over 50 baht ey? Ya it's a scam but it's less than $2 and he should have asked somebody how long it would take. You can never in any business in any country negotiate a price for a service, take that service, then upon completion pay a different price and walk away.

Typical egotistical tourist unaware of Thai culture, thinking he is superior and the small little smiling man in the tuk tuk can't do anything about it. He learned his lesson and hopefully will be more respectful in the future."

(No reference at all to the victim assaulted by 2 Thais - the normal 2 on 1 configuration.)

I find this quote difficult to reconcile with your opening post where you are asking what makes people cynical here.

Given your opinion on the tuk tuk assault can you explain why long-term expats take views like your own.

There are some interesting insights in this thread but I am having difficulty with this one.

caf

http://www.thaivisa.com/forum/Canadian-Con...uk-t327771.html

[PeaceBlondie]

May I ask you to each review your last 50 or 100 posts? Have you made mostly helpful comments, cheery remarks? How argumentative are you? Are you grumpy or angry?

Wish I knew how to do this with your forum software. I just know I can click my username and then click posts but that only reveals the last 5-6 posts I've made. I often want to go back and look at prior posts and see if somebody responded (I'll also undertake the exercise you've suggested) - can anybody explain how to go back and look at our prior posts in bulk? I suggest everybody do this and report back the results if you feel comfortable.

I think everybody can check your entire history. Left-click on your name. Select 'Find members posts'. I checked my last 140 posts.

[caf]

"I'm going to have to side with the Tuk Tuk driver on this one, especially if it is true that the guy swore at him and kicked him or even made a motion toward him with his feet, which as we all know is the worst form of insult in Thai culture.

All that over 50 baht ey? Ya it's a scam but it's less than $2 and he should have asked somebody how long it would take. You can never in any business in any country negotiate a price for a service, take that service, then upon completion pay a different price and walk away.

Typical egotistical tourist unaware of Thai culture, thinking he is superior and the small little smiling man in the tuk tuk can't do anything about it. He learned his lesson and hopefully will be more respectful in the future."

(No reference at all to the victim assaulted by 2 Thais - the normal 2 on 1 configuration.)

I find this quote difficult to reconcile with your opening post where you are asking what makes people cynical here.

Given your opinion on the tuk tuk assault can you explain why long-term expats take views like your own.

There are some interesting insights in this thread but I am having difficulty with this one.

caf

When I made the OP I was not finger pointing and claiming that I am perfect. I was simply making an observation about expats in this country (of which I am one) and inviting people to discuss the topic in general terms.

Taking things personally or trying to make this discussion personal is not very constructive and will only derail the topic into a finger pointing, pissing contest, flame war. Let's please not go down that road.

I was not trying to be personal and certainly not flaming. As i said "There are some interesting insights in this thread but I am having difficulty with this one."

One example of Arsinization seems to be an expat becoming a Thai apologist, more Thai than the Thai, wearing rose coloured glasses. My question was why this happens

I am as interested as you in debating this, and I really don't know the answer. It is however an observable fact in my view. But what causes it?

Apologies if you took my post the wrong way. Not intended.

caf

[caf]

"I'm going to have to side with the Tuk Tuk driver on this one, especially if it is true that the guy swore at him and kicked him or even made a motion toward him with his feet, which as we all know is the worst form of insult in Thai culture.

All that over 50 baht ey? Ya it's a scam but it's less than $2 and he should have asked somebody how long it would take. You can never in any business in any country negotiate a price for a service, take that service, then upon completion pay a different price and walk away.

Typical egotistical tourist unaware of Thai culture, thinking he is superior and the small little smiling man in the tuk tuk can't do anything about it. He learned his lesson and hopefully will be more respectful in the future."

(No reference at all to the victim assaulted by 2 Thais - the normal 2 on 1 configuration.)

I find this quote difficult to reconcile with your opening post where you are asking what makes people cynical here.

Given your opinion on the tuk tuk assault can you explain why long-term expats take views like your own.

There are some interesting insights in this thread but I am having difficulty with this one.

caf

http://www.thaivisa.com/forum/Canadian-Con...uk-t327771.html

This seems to be a duplicate response. I had thought you were serious. Why not answer the question? See the reply to your other duplicate post

[IanForbes]

Stating the obvious, a person with TEAS is not happy, pure and simple. This could be for reasons discussed here and others not yet mentioned. If an expat's life in Thailand is not fulfilling, for whatever reason, how could he be happy? In fact, unless he could suppress all emotions, how could he not have some degree of TEAS?

For older expats already retired, and facing daily boredom the realization that "this is the way it is going to be from now on (indefinitely)" can be a major downer. Especially after the first couple of year honeymoon with their new life in Thailand has passed. Maybe the new gf/wife isn't quite as exciting as before (boredom in the bedroom). Maybe not being able to identify a hobby similar to one previously had in the West. Maybe feeling trapped here, for any number of reasons and in any number of ways, but feeling unable to make the difficult but necessary changes. Maybe the adjustment to life on a fixed income which allows considerably less free spending. Maybe the boredom has revealed a degree of underlying clinical depression masked by many prior years of stimulating times in one's occupation or otherwise.

There are so many "maybe"s .. endless...and many of them valid sources of TEAS.

I remember reading in the book "West with the Night", the author, Beryl Markham, an aviatrix said "boredom is the worst possible fate" (or something similar) as she complained about cockpit boredom as she flew hour after hour alone. I haven't forgotten her words. Reducing or eliminating boredom, if present, is a must do for all us expats.

I think you pretty much nailed the situation and encapsulated it. As a person grows older we lose many of our former physical abilities. That is depressing to some men who were once the epitomy of manhood. Add to that the fact that many of our friends are dying off each year. Every spring when I return to Canada I learn of a few more former friends and acquaintences who have passed on. Many are 10 years younger than me. Fortunately, for myself I'm physically fit and enjoy life as much as I did when I was thirty... and maybe even more. I'm also lucky that I have many hobbies and interests that can occupy my time. As already pointed out by someone, many men who retire, die within a few short years later. That is because they haven't any new challenges ad interests. For me there isn't enough hours in the day.

OH, and I also own Beryl Markham's book... "West with the night". She was a truly remarkable woman and briefly mentioned in the great movie... "Out of Africa" with Meryl Streep and Robert Redford.

[DegenFarang]

"I'm going to have to side with the Tuk Tuk driver on this one, especially if it is true that the guy swore at him and kicked him or even made a motion toward him with his feet, which as we all know is the worst form of insult in Thai culture.

All that over 50 baht ey? Ya it's a scam but it's less than $2 and he should have asked somebody how long it would take. You can never in any business in any country negotiate a price for a service, take that service, then upon completion pay a different price and walk away.

Typical egotistical tourist unaware of Thai culture, thinking he is superior and the small little smiling man in the tuk tuk can't do anything about it. He learned his lesson and hopefully will be more respectful in the future."

(No reference at all to the victim assaulted by 2 Thais - the normal 2 on 1 configuration.)

I find this quote difficult to reconcile with your opening post where you are asking what makes people cynical here.

Given your opinion on the tuk tuk assault can you explain why long-term expats take views like your own.

There are some interesting insights in this thread but I am having difficulty with this one.

caf

http://www.thaivisa.com/forum/Canadian-Con...uk-t327771.html

This seems to be a duplicate response. I had thought you were serious. Why not answer the question? See the reply to your other duplicate post

Can I explain why long term expats take views like what? That if a tourist refuses to pay an agreed upon tuk tuk fare, kicks the tuk tuk driver and walks away, that he deserves to get punched in the face? I'm not sure that is a view consistent with TEAS. Possibly some long term expats take views like that because they are rational people and do not automatically side with the foreigner whenever there is a dispute between Thai and foreigner?

[cognos]

Indeed, one of the symptoms of TEAS is "bastard face".

Just check out any bar or farang hangout. Spot the guy (it's usually a guy) who's been here x number of years with the expression of indignance/annoyance/anger/rage/suppressed rage permanently settled upon his features.

Hahahahahahahahaa!!

"Bastard Face!"......Love it!!

i have another name for "bastard face"..the fucccc u attitude

[caf]

"I'm going to have to side with the Tuk Tuk driver on this one, especially if it is true that the guy swore at him and kicked him or even made a motion toward him with his feet, which as we all know is the worst form of insult in Thai culture.

All that over 50 baht ey? Ya it's a scam but it's less than $2 and he should have asked somebody how long it would take. You can never in any business in any country negotiate a price for a service, take that service, then upon completion pay a different price and walk away.

Typical egotistical tourist unaware of Thai culture, thinking he is superior and the small little smiling man in the tuk tuk can't do anything about it. He learned his lesson and hopefully will be more respectful in the future."

(No reference at all to the victim assaulted by 2 Thais - the normal 2 on 1 configuration.)

I find this quote difficult to reconcile with your opening post where you are asking what makes people cynical here.

Given your opinion on the tuk tuk assault can you explain why long-term expats take views like your own.

There are some interesting insights in this thread but I am having difficulty with this one.

caf

http://www.thaivisa.com/forum/Canadian-Con...uk-t327771.html

This seems to be a duplicate response. I had thought you were serious. Why not answer the question? See the reply to your other duplicate post

Can I explain why long term expats take views like what? That if a tourist refuses to pay an agreed upon tuk tuk fare, kicks the tuk tuk driver and walks away, that he deserves to get punched in the face? I'm not sure that is a view consistent with TEAS. Possibly some long term expats take views like that because they are rational people and do not automatically side with the foreigner whenever there is a dispute between Thai and foreigner?

As I said:

"One example of Arsinization seems to be an expat becoming a Thai apologist, more Thai than the Thai, wearing rose coloured glasses. My question was why this happens

I am as interested as you in debating this, and I really don't know the answer. It is however an observable fact in my view. But what causes it?"

Look at the number of TVers who do side with the Thai ( The Canadian guy assaulted thread to which you refer). It shows bias not rationalisation. But why do they do it?

[phetaroi]

Interesting thread, and I don't think there is "one" answer.

1. I think there are some farang here who arrive with their negativity. I don't think that "permanently" leaving one's own country and living overseas is something to be taken lightly. Some people may be somewhat like me -- I decided when I retired that I wanted to live my sunset years living a different and intriguing life. A positive reason for the move. But I have certainly met other farangs here who are leaving their own country because they didn't have a fulfilling life there...either.

2. Then there are days when little things build up that just make you feel a bit defeated. I had one of those days yesterday. I decided to go to a movie...let's just say in the Siam Square area. I asked for a ticket for 15:00 (3 p.m.); the boy showed me the time on the screen and asked if it was correct; I agreed; I went up to the entrance to that particular auditorium and waited a bit and there was no sign of it actually opening up; I asked a near-by attendant and he said 10 minutes after looking at my ticket (it was then 14:55); then I looked more closely at the ticket and noticed it said 15:55)...a whole hour later and not at all what I asked for; I asked another attendance and he too said 10 minutes and that 15:55 is "same thing" as 15:00; I went down to the ticket line, which now had over 30 people waiting...stood in line...finally was told I must have made a mistake and could not change the ticket because by now the movie had already started. Okay, so big deal. I decided to just surrender with a smile and go down the street to another theatre that was showing the same film at 15:30. When I got there, the movie had started at 15:00; "but the internet said 15:30"; "Mistake." Total surrender...guess I'll see the movie another day. So I decide to walk over to Auntie Anne's for a lunch snack...some of these cheesy chicken bites...there's one in the case...I ask for it..."Cannot buy, wait 10 minutes"; "No, I'll just take that one"; "Cannot buy"; "Nevermind". So I walk into a stationery store to buy something I have purchased there multiple times; can't find any; ask; "We don't sell." Well, yes they do, but told again they never sell. So the other times I buy there it must just be me dreaming. Glad I'm retired...my entire afternoon shot all to hel_l. But for me...mai pben rai...okay, so I had a bad day...plenty of good days to make up for it. But not everyone can say mai pben rai. For some it would grate on them and continue be added on to all the other frustrations they experience here.

[Tokay]

I have TEAS.

Why?

Because my day to day life revolves around non-stop headaches. Why? The locals. From ordering food, to fixing a bike, to fixing a roof leak, to internet connections, to people stealing the fish out of my pond, to the non stop smell of burning trash, to exhaust fumes blowing in my face from buses, from rude taxi drives, from chain smoking Thais, to soi dogs chasing my every night as I drive down the street, to multiple attempted break-ins to my house, to EVERYTHING I buy here breaking shortly after I buy it, to not being able to do anything that revolves around common sense, to getting ripped off or double charged everywhere I go... you get the point.

It was great at first and my skin was thick. I could take the hits. These days, I just want to relax, live a laid back life, have a roof that does't leak, internet that works, dogs that don't try to bite me, you know, the simple stuff. 10 years of this has worn me to the bone. It's FAIL from the time I wake up, until the time I go to sleep. It's always something and it's become a joke around the house, when we buy something, start the countdown until it breaks or doesn't work out of the box.

I totally understand why so many of you drink non-stop. I'm not a drinker but I get it. Maybe I should start. Maybe Jimmy Buffet has it right after all.

The weather plays an import roll on how much I can take. Right now it's not hot or humid and it feels nice. I can take more hits, mai dais and mai loos than usual. Though, when it gets nasty humid and hot, I just need to stay in the house, as I don't do well with FAIL and incompetent people. I mean, when you order a pizza and the guy brings it sideways (vertical) and it ruins the pizza, and then the next TWO guys do the same thing, after having to bring a free one for ruining the one before, it sort of beats ya down.

Now if you will excuse me, it's 7am and I need to get some sleep before some filthy guy name Porn rings my house bell, wanting to clean my water tank, and the falang truck drives down the street blasting his speakers, selling a truck load of falang. And, if I'm lucky, no one will steal any of the fish from my pond today. The locals like to jump the fence, steal my fish and eat them. But first, if there is a God, my internet has disconnected and I won't be able to post this. Ahhh, just another wonderful morning in paradise.

[Tokay]

Then there are days when little things build up that just make you feel a bit defeated. I had one of those days yesterday. I decided to go to a movie...let's just say in the Siam Square area. I asked for a ticket for 15:00 (3 p.m.); the boy showed me the time on the screen and asked if it was correct; I agreed; I went up to the entrance to that particular auditorium and waited a bit and there was no sign of it actually opening up; I asked a near-by attendant and he said 10 minutes after looking at my ticket (it was then 14:55); then I looked more closely at the ticket and noticed it said 15:55)...a whole hour later and not at all what I asked for; I asked another attendance and he too said 10 minutes and that 15:55 is "same thing" as 15:00; I went down to the ticket line, which now had over 30 people waiting...stood in line...finally was told I must have made a mistake and could not change the ticket because by now the movie had already started. Okay, so big deal. I decided to just surrender with a smile and go down the street to another theatre that was showing the same film at 15:30. When I got there, the movie had started at 15:00; "but the internet said 15:30"; "Mistake." Total surrender...guess I'll see the movie another day. So I decide to walk over to Auntie Anne's for a lunch snack...some of these cheesy chicken bites...there's one in the case...I ask for it..."Cannot buy, wait 10 minutes"; "No, I'll just take that one"; "Cannot buy"; "Nevermind". So I walk into a stationery store to buy something I have purchased there multiple times; can't find any; ask; "We don't sell." Well, yes they do, but told again they never sell. So the other times I buy there it must just be me dreaming.

That pretty much sums up just about every day of my life these days (when I leave the house). If I don't have to have interaction with them, I'm good. If there is interaction... 9.5 out of 10 times it goes sour. Just like how you described you day.

[MikeyIdea]

One example of Arsinization seems to be an expat becoming a Thai apologist, more Thai than the Thai, wearing rose coloured glasses. My question was why this happens

Caf, you are right. There was a period when I was a Thai apologist. Awareness of my state was the way out

Why did I become like that? I think it is because I fairly often during a period had to listen to people who suddenly had become experts on Thailand after only a couple of years here, and offered hilarious stupid reasons as to why Thai’s were the way they were, by applying western values and principles to the Thai’s situation. It bored me to death

My solution was simply: Apply Mai Pen Rai- Let the uninformed be uninformed - Keeping your own harmony is of course much more important

[MikeyIdea]

I have TEAS.

Why?

Because my day to day life revolves around non-stop headaches. Why? The locals. From ordering food, to fixing a bike, to fixing a roof leak, to internet connections, to people stealing the fish out of my pond, to the non stop smell of burning trash, to exhaust fumes blowing in my face from buses, from rude taxi drives, from chain smoking Thais, to soi dogs chasing my every night as I drive down the street, to multiple attempted break-ins to my house, to EVERYTHING I buy here breaking shortly after I buy it, to not being able to do anything that revolves around common sense, to getting ripped off or double charged everywhere I go... you get the point.

It was great at first and my skin was thick. I could take the hits. These days, I just want to relax, live a laid back life, have a roof that does't leak, internet that works, dogs that don't try to bite me, you know, the simple stuff. 10 years of this has worn me to the bone. It's FAIL from the time I wake up, until the time I go to sleep. It's always something and it's become a joke around the house, when we buy something, start the countdown until it breaks or doesn't work out of the box.

I totally understand why so many of you drink non-stop. I'm not a drinker but I get it. Maybe I should start. Maybe Jimmy Buffet has it right after all.

The weather plays an import roll on how much I can take. Right now it's not hot or humid and it feels nice. I can take more hits, mai dais and mai loos than usual. Though, when it gets nasty humid and hot, I just need to stay in the house, as I don't do well with FAIL and incompetent people. I mean, when you order a pizza and the guy brings it sideways (vertical) and it ruins the pizza, and then the next TWO guys do the same thing, after having to bring a free one for ruining the one before, it sort of beats ya down.

Now if you will excuse me, it's 7am and I need to get some sleep before some filthy guy name Porn rings my house bell, wanting to clean my water tank, and the falang truck drives down the street blasting his speakers, selling a truck load of falang. And, if I'm lucky, no one will steal any of the fish from my pond today. The locals like to jump the fence, steal my fish and eat them. But first, if there is a God, my internet has disconnected and I won't be able to post this. Ahhh, just another wonderful morning in paradise.

Sounds much more interesting than any day I used to have in Europe

It doesn't necessarily matter if it is positive or negative, at least something happens.

[bgfkhlgfhgfdh]

One of the main problems, is it's a pain in the ass to get around Bangkok. I didn't have this problem, before Thailand. Lack of mobility.

Besides transportation, I also used to enjoy walking around, leisurely, exploring. But not so easy to do here, or it can be done, but limited. So, more often than not stay at home.

Right now, I could be out and about doing something, but what? What would you do in Bangkok by yourself at 11:23 am ? Go...somewhere...to do...what? Later today, I will see my gf and then we can have fun together. So, basically, the problem is, what to do, with my spare time. What should I be busy doing, I have no idea.

[caf]

One example of Arsinization seems to be an expat becoming a Thai apologist, more Thai than the Thai, wearing rose coloured glasses. My question was why this happens

Caf, you are right. There was a period when I was a Thai apologist. Awareness of my state was the way out

Why did I become like that? I think it is because I fairly often during a period had to listen to people who suddenly had become experts on Thailand after only a couple of years here, and offered hilarious stupid reasons as to why Thai's were the way they were, by applying western values and principles to the Thai's situation. It bored me to death

My solution was simply: Apply Mai Pen Rai- Let the uninformed be uninformed - Keeping your own harmony is of course much more important

I think an application of maebhenrai is a good solution as you say. In small doses. If in overdose I do not accept. Like when an electrician plumbs in a washing machine with no earth and says maebhenrai.

In the canadian - tuktuk driver example.

1. I do not accept those who blame the farang automatically ( the thai apologist) - he should understand the culture, he should have resarched where the hotel was, it was only $2 , it was his own fault if he did not pay, he served to be beaten up............

2. I would also not support those who automatically say the farang must, by definition of being a farang, always be right.

3. I do support those who look at all the facts as we see them and try to make a balanced judgment

My point is why are there so many in category 1? What creates this example of arsinization? This thread is giving some reasons and I think is getting somewhere slowly.

caf

[Birdman]

A complete clear situation, Justitia would say. Tourist was wrong to ask for a cheaper price, but he had the right to complain (only). Driver was wrong, because there was no need to beat the tourist. Much more harm was done to the tourist.

The world is not black and white only. Rather any nuance in between.

[Tokay]

Sounds much more interesting than any day I used to have in Europe

It doesn't necessarily matter if it is positive or negative, at least something happens.

You're right, at least something happens. That was fun for many years, always an adventure, but now I just want to get through at least 1/2 of my day without dealing with people who try to hammer on the nuts holding my bike wheels on and saying Mai Pen Rai about it. Just a little common sense would get me though the day.

[MikeyIdea]

You are asking someone living in Thailand to both not say Mai Pen Rai and have common sense? Isn't that contradictory?

Of topic, sorry couldn't help it. I genuinely do love this country guys

[Tokay]

You are asking someone living in Thailand to both not say Mai Pen Rai and have common sense? Isn't that contradictory?

Of topic, sorry couldn't help it. I genuinely do love this country guys

It is indeed asking for too much.

They need a "common sense" and "logic" check-in at the airport. You leave it there when you enter and pick it up on your way out.

[rayong09]

Thanks Tokay you made me laugh with your daily hurdles. Not laughing at you but the whole situation, many of us here can probably relate to it.

What I find really frustrating sometimes is my partner is so laid back, softly spoken and hardly ever gets confrontational will just stand there and smile and not really help when I'm trying to deal with a double frustrating situation like a tradesmen doing some work where I'm trying to say please do it this way, how I would like, after all I am paying for what I want not just that will do now pay me!

[DegenFarang]

I have TEAS.

Why?

Because my day to day life revolves around non-stop headaches. Why? The locals. From ordering food, to fixing a bike, to fixing a roof leak, to internet connections, to people stealing the fish out of my pond, to the non stop smell of burning trash, to exhaust fumes blowing in my face from buses, from rude taxi drives, from chain smoking Thais, to soi dogs chasing my every night as I drive down the street, to multiple attempted break-ins to my house, to EVERYTHING I buy here breaking shortly after I buy it, to not being able to do anything that revolves around common sense, to getting ripped off or double charged everywhere I go... you get the point.

It was great at first and my skin was thick. I could take the hits. These days, I just want to relax, live a laid back life, have a roof that does't leak, internet that works, dogs that don't try to bite me, you know, the simple stuff. 10 years of this has worn me to the bone. It's FAIL from the time I wake up, until the time I go to sleep. It's always something and it's become a joke around the house, when we buy something, start the countdown until it breaks or doesn't work out of the box.

I totally understand why so many of you drink non-stop. I'm not a drinker but I get it. Maybe I should start. Maybe Jimmy Buffet has it right after all.

The weather plays an import roll on how much I can take. Right now it's not hot or humid and it feels nice. I can take more hits, mai dais and mai loos than usual. Though, when it gets nasty humid and hot, I just need to stay in the house, as I don't do well with FAIL and incompetent people. I mean, when you order a pizza and the guy brings it sideways (vertical) and it ruins the pizza, and then the next TWO guys do the same thing, after having to bring a free one for ruining the one before, it sort of beats ya down.

Now if you will excuse me, it's 7am and I need to get some sleep before some filthy guy name Porn rings my house bell, wanting to clean my water tank, and the falang truck drives down the street blasting his speakers, selling a truck load of falang. And, if I'm lucky, no one will steal any of the fish from my pond today. The locals like to jump the fence, steal my fish and eat them. But first, if there is a God, my internet has disconnected and I won't be able to post this. Ahhh, just another wonderful morning in paradise.

Why dont you move? Where do you live?

I live in a bangkok condo and have none of these problems. Don't even have the problem with things breaking - though built in fixtures of my brand new condo have begun breaking which is frustrating - and I'm often awoken early in the morning and annoyed throughout the day by the constant ongoing construction in the units above, below and around me - however I could have avoided that with more research before I moved in.

Have never had a problem with a soi dog, though there are many around here - and have never had any issues with locals - with them stealing from me or otherwise. People tend to mind their own business and certainly don't give me any trouble.

[Tokay]

Why dont you move? Where do you live?

I live in a bangkok condo and have none of these problems. Don't even have the problem with things breaking - though built in fixtures of my brand new condo have begun breaking which is frustrating - and I'm often awoken early in the morning and annoyed throughout the day by the constant ongoing construction in the units above, below and around me - however I could have avoided that with more research before I moved in.

Have never had a problem with a soi dog, though there are many around here - and have never had any issues with locals - with them stealing from me or otherwise. People tend to mind their own business and certainly don't give me any trouble.

Bangkok is a little more civilized. My job unfortunately pins me to Pattaya. I'm working on changing that now. Pattaya is not the place for me. I fell in love with Thailand many years and Pattaya is anything but. My long term goal is to leave Thailand, but that won't be for a few more years, or unless I'm able to move out of Pattaya and things settle down.

Man, everything I buy breaks, rusts, bends, shorts out, leaks... you name it. It has become a running joke in the house. I am CONVINCED the best products are exported, leaving the rejected and defective ones in country.

Edited January 8, 2010 by Tokay

[phetaroi]

One of the main problems, is it's a pain in the ass to get around Bangkok. I didn't have this problem, before Thailand. Lack of mobility.

Besides transportation, I also used to enjoy walking around, leisurely, exploring. But not so easy to do here, or it can be done, but limited. So, more often than not stay at home.

Right now, I could be out and about doing something, but what? What would you do in Bangkok by yourself at 11:23 am ? Go...somewhere...to do...what? Later today, I will see my gf and then we can have fun together. So, basically, the problem is, what to do, with my spare time. What should I be busy doing, I have no idea.

Hmmmm...not sure I agree so much here. We're getting ready to buy a car this month. Won't use it so much for driving in Bangkok, other than for weekly grocery shopping. Buying it mostly for upcountry travel. But, I used to live outside of Washington, D.C. Didn't drive much in the city there either. Relied on the subway.

Here I enjoy walking around, and go in practically any neighborhood. I can't say I ever dared do that in Washington. There were whole sections of the city people just didn't go to.

It seems like you are choosing to isolate yourself...which, of course, is okay. Come on...it just takes one step to get started.

[Dakhar]

Indeed, one of the symptoms of TEAS is "bastard face".

Just check out any bar or farang hangout. Spot the guy (it's usually a guy) who's been here x number of years with the expression of indignance/annoyance/anger/rage/suppressed rage permanently settled upon his features.

Briggsy, I'm sorry to say that I feel I have fallen into the category you have so well described.

I am aware of it. I don't like it. In fact it's a bit of an effort at times because it's actually totally against my real character. And I feel slowly overtime it may become pemanent.

There is mainly one reason for it, and that is to ensure people leave me alone. I will innitiate the approach if I want. Contact will be made on my grounds. For examptle, I only talk to Thais outside of my immediate family/work/interest circles only on a needs basis.

I have found that familiarity does in fact breed contempt or an opportunity to be ripped off or give Thais an opportunity to say something inappropriate to me.

It's my barrier, my protection. And, it works.

As I said I don't particularly like it, but it's the way it must be in this part of the world.

got to say i can relate

[Dakhar]

One of the main problems, is it's a pain in the ass to get around Bangkok. I didn't have this problem, before Thailand. Lack of mobility.

Besides transportation, I also used to enjoy walking around, leisurely, exploring. But not so easy to do here, or it can be done, but limited. So, more often than not stay at home.

Right now, I could be out and about doing something, but what? What would you do in Bangkok by yourself at 11:23 am ? Go...somewhere...to do...what? Later today, I will see my gf and then we can have fun together. So, basically, the problem is, what to do, with my spare time. What should I be busy doing, I have no idea.

Hmmmm...not sure I agree so much here. We're getting ready to buy a car this month. Won't use it so much for driving in Bangkok, other than for weekly grocery shopping. Buying it mostly for upcountry travel. But, I used to live outside of Washington, D.C. Didn't drive much in the city there either. Relied on the subway.

Here I enjoy walking around, and go in practically any neighborhood. I can't say I ever dared do that in Washington. There were whole sections of the city people just didn't go to.

It seems like you are choosing to isolate yourself...which, of course, is okay. Come on...it just takes one step to get started.

it sounds lame,

but after I bought a GPS the world I function in got much bigger. i'd say it helped improve my quality of life.

[Seismic]

Based upon this post I am going to go out on a limb and guess that you are exactly the type of person I was talking about in the OP, apologies if I've made an incorrect assumption, but:

Were you like this before you came to Thailand or did you turn into this person while here? If you had stayed in your home country those 29 years do you think you would have the same disposition and be on forums complaining about things you don't like about your home country? Or do you think Thailand specifically caused this?

I'm not so much passing judgement on people afflicted with TEAS as I am curious as to the factors that make it happen. Whether it is innate and those types of people are somehow drawn to Thailand or if there is something about this culture that causes TEAS. Either way, it's not something that can be helped. We can't choose our personalities - whether we came here with them or they were shaped while we were here - so it's not a criticism, just an observation and some questions about that observation.

Actually there are many things that I dont like right now in the UK, and even though I no longer spend much time there I still feel I have the right to comment upon them as it is my Nation. Then again there are many things I dont like about other countries too, Angola,Congo and Venezuela spring to mind.

What I am trying to say is that I dont think that Thailand per se is the cause of people complaining, I think that many people complain (legitimately and contructively) Because there are problems and in many cases these problems already have solutions from elsewhere.

In general I dont complain a lot, or too loudly, but i do believe that people have a right to voice their opinions as, indeed, we are now doing on this forum. If no one ever complained about anything then we would never have any meaningful change, would we ??

regards