Calories Burned During Sex:

[Chris Lawrence]

Calories Burned During Sex:

REMOVING HER CLOTHES:

With her consent.................................12 Calories

Without her consent...........................2,187 Calories

OPENING HER BRA:

With both hands.................................. 8 Calories

With one hand....................................12 Calories

With your teeth.................................485 Calories

PUTTING ON A CONDOM:

With an erection..................................6 Calories

Without an erection...........................3,315 Calories

POSITIONS:

Missionary...................................12 Calories

69 lying down...............................78 Calories

69 standing up..............................812 Calories

Wheelbarrow................................216 Calories

Doggy Style..................................326 Calories

Italian chandelier..........................2,912 Calories

ORGASMS:

Real........................................112 Calories

Fake..........................................1,315 Calories

POST ORGASM:

Lying in bed hugging.............................18 Calories

Getting up immediately.........................36 Calories

Explaining why you got out of bed immediately...816 Calories

GETTING A SECOND ERECTION: If you are:

20-29 years......................................36 Calories

30-39 years......................................80 Calories

40-49 years.....................................124 Calories

50-59 years...................................1,972 Calories

60-69 years...................................7,916 Calories *****

70 and over........................Results are still pending

DRESSING AFTERWARDS

Calmly..........................................32 Calories

In a hurry.......................................98 Calories

With her father knocking at the door..........5,218 Calories

With her husband knocking at the door......8,775 Calories

With your wife knocking at the door..........13,521 Calories

Results may vary.