General Expectation By Wife's Friends Re Payment

[onlycw]

I was shocked to learn that this is a normal and often asked question. Is this how the female population sees marriage to a farang? That there should be some financial reward for putting up with an older, ugly farang?

Just asking. (We share living expenses - and I scoffed when an old man I know confessed to paying an annual sum to his wife.) No payment was asked - but the whole concept seems to be deeply rooted in society.

these friends all have good jobs. I'm just wondering if sin sod and tong mun (spelling?) are not the end but just the beginning AFAIK?

[WinnieTheKhwai]

I don't really know, not being old and ugly. Also I think it's widely known among her friends that I'm poor. (Well, not as rich financially as the Mrs. anyway. )

Apparenlty, being young and handsome and hung like a donkey is enough.

[whichschool]

Apparenlty, being young and handsome and hung like a donkey is enough.

Is that what you tell all the boys?

[chickenslegs]

I don't think you should have 'scoffed'. If it works for them then it really doesn't matter what anyone else thinks.

I am retired and I don't want my wife (a few years younger than me) to work, because I want us to be free to travel and enjoy life together.

All our bank accounts are joint, so she and I can spend as we see fit (and within our means) but we always have a discussion before a major purchase. This works for us.

My father was a coal miner in the UK. He always gave my mother a 'housekeeping' allowance each week and kept the remainder himself, which is what his father had done before him (actually, my Dad saved carefully and we always had a nice home, holidays and other treats).

The fathers of some of my friends would hand over their unopened wage packet to their wife, who would give them 'pocket money'. Some were careful with the money and others pissed it up against the wall.

Horses for courses - as my Dad might have said.

Reason for edit - punctuation.

[givenall]

I always say if anyone of us Farang need to have a finacial obligation to marry a Thai gal, then don’t marry just have fun. It probably is cheaper in the long run and less hassles. Overall we have probably a lot more things going on for us, inelegant, experience, etc. etc. Farang don’t need to be ATM machine over here

[OxfordWill]

My father deposited a monthly sum in a joint account for domestic stuff- i.e. my mums spending on food, bills for the home, etc. Funny how it never occured to anyone to suggest this might be bad or trickery on the part of my mum. But in Thailand, that kind of worry is rife.

[britmaveric]

Nowt - she has her dosh through her business why would she need dosh from me?

[noise]

My father deposited a monthly sum in a joint account for domestic stuff- i.e. my mums spending on food, bills for the home, etc. Funny how it never occured to anyone to suggest this might be bad or trickery on the part of my mum. But in Thailand, that kind of worry is rife.

OxfordWill..... Isn't that ironic? Can't you just imagine what would happen in farang land if a husband told his wife, "HERE IS SOME SEED MONEY. FROM NOW ON I WANT YOU TO SUBMIT A CLAIM FOR REIMBURSEMENT FOR EVERYTHING YOU SPEND. I WILL REIMBURSE YOU IF AND ONLY IF I APPROVE OF WHAT YOU BOUGHT OR SPENT IT ON AND WHY. THAT INCLUDES MONIES SPENT HELPING OUT MUM AND DAD."

I liked how Chicklegs said his marriage works (probably because it is like mine).

The original poster's comments sound more like a verbal financial contracts instead of relationships.

[onlooker]

That there should be some financial reward for putting up with an older, ugly farang?

Kind of hard to argue against their point when you put it like that.

[JUDAS]

In some ways Thailand is no different from the west. There will always be exceptions , but do you really think a 25 year old western lady marries a 65 year old guy for love?

[robblok]

That there should be some financial reward for putting up with an older, ugly farang?

Kind of hard to argue against their point when you put it like that.

Agreed, if the girl is better looking a lot younger you will have to pay her. Just the same older Thais pay for young mia nois. Its not love its a business arrangement.