ozzieovaseas Posted June 19, 2010 Share Posted June 19, 2010 (edited) Back in my former working days in Australia, a wise old work colleague once commented thus on women: "Cobber, ya gotta get onto 'em while they're young and train 'em around to your way of thinking" Now, im not so bold as to say good old Roys methods would work on the likes of this thai variety, Yet, in the same vain as the man from Snowy river, I'll keep plugging away and riding her down that steep and treacherous slippery slope, All the while clinging on desperately to the belief that ANY wild horse can (eventually) be broken in... So,im thinking maybe we can share a few tried and tested training methods that may pay dividends when dealing with Thai GFs: I'll go first with just a few: 1. If Thai GF wants you to meet her for a shopping trip, so as to buy all manner of crap you dont need and want,(in my case usually expensive whitening creams ect) Agree to meet her at the store at a certain time, BUT while she is shopping you ring her and tell her you have slipped when walking down the stairs, have hit your head on the way down and are in terrible pain and cant meet her. If by chance she turns up with the same amount as goodies as normal,before she can hit you up for the bill,while clutching your head and acheing ankle, tell her she is so kind to contribute with the shopping bill while you are in such terrible pain.. This actually worked for me..she didnt ask for the shopping money and NEVER goes shopping alone anymore..hehe 2. If you need/want something from her, NEVER underestimate the power of massage.. I find combing her long hair for half an hour or so while she's watching TV a winner every time. If you can give her a head massage and even plat her hair, it will work even better...I nearly gaurantee you will get WHATEVER you want (err..within reason, money excluded of course!) I've tried this method many times in the past and had a 100% success rate. 3. Some of my best work thus far: GF had been hinting for some time about how she would be a little short of her monthly payment to Mae.. Eventually, after three days of hinting she gets desperate and phones me saying saying she needs 2000 baht,speaking in thai... Because i am walking on my way home from shopping, the road noise is bad and its a little harder to hear whats being said. Coupled with this,she speaks nearly zero English and my thai speaking is VERY average, and so she will usually make allowances for this: (in Thai) HER: Need SONG PAAN..today, very urgent! ME :(speaking quickly in muffled tone): Oh, you want SOM PUN?..today?..now? (som-pun is a iced orange shake for those who dont know) HER: Yes, i need SONG PAAN, today, can you bring to offit? ME : Ok,ok, i bring SOM PUN to offit. Right now i shopping but i walk offit in 30 minutes. OK? HER: OK, Kaa So i drop of my shopping at hotel and leave my wallet at hotel, taking only 100 baht note for the 30 baht for 2 orange shakes. I walk to her work, get through the doors. The three office girls look,they see the orange shakes. I try to keep a straight face.. It finally clicks with one of the girls, no doubt she knew what was going down, that i was supposed to be delivering 2000 baht.. She points at me carrying the drinks: OHH..Farang has som pun!!...Farang kit SOM PUN!!!...HAHAHA Pretty soon the whole room of girls are in hysterics laughing,that is, all except for the GF...i think one of them is actually crying she is laughing so hard! It takes a little while but eventually GF joins in the laughter as well. When it dies down: HER: "no no, you not understand, i say song paan baht..need 2000 baht" ME: ohhh,OHH, SONG PAAN!!..Sorry,sorry,no have, leave my wallet at home in shopping bag..(padding pockets to reveal no have wallet) :D :jap:EDIT: Sorry mods,accidently posted in wrong thread! ...and forgot the i in Thai on heading!! Edited June 19, 2010 by ozzieovaseas Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
robblok Posted June 19, 2010 Share Posted June 19, 2010 How can you be with a girl if your comprehension of the Thai language is limited and her English is practically zero ? Just curious about it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yabaaaa Posted June 19, 2010 Share Posted June 19, 2010 How can you be with a girl if your comprehension of the Thai language is limited and her English is practically zero ? Just curious about it. Its purely sexual Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
robblok Posted June 19, 2010 Share Posted June 19, 2010 How can you be with a girl if your comprehension of the Thai language is limited and her English is practically zero ? Just curious about it. Its purely sexual That sounds about right. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CHdiver Posted June 19, 2010 Share Posted June 19, 2010 Not for too long anymore Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
moe666 Posted June 19, 2010 Share Posted June 19, 2010 How can you be with a girl if your comprehension of the Thai language is limited and her English is practically zero ? Just curious about it. Its purely sexual It sounds like more work than it is worth. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jim's_a_Thai_Fox Posted June 19, 2010 Share Posted June 19, 2010 Yeah, Must admit, such a relationship does sound like a pain in the butt and a potentially pricey one at that... but, staying on topic, the OP has some decent points. A friend went for a Thai massage that can turn into more than that if money is paid and you fancy the lass... him, being a broke teacher actually gave the masseuse a 30 minute massage and got a "full service body massage" for the price of a Thai massage - a saving of about 1000 Bhat! In my experience, spending any amount of time massaging a womans' head/feet/back comes back to you ten fold in the bedroom department - western women and Thai ladies alike. Cheers Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yabaaaa Posted June 19, 2010 Share Posted June 19, 2010 Yeah, Must admit, such a relationship does sound like a pain in the butt and a potentially pricey one at that... but, staying on topic, the OP has some decent points. A friend went for a Thai massage that can turn into more than that if money is paid and you fancy the lass... him, being a broke teacher actually gave the masseuse a 30 minute massage and got a "full service body massage" for the price of a Thai massage - a saving of about 1000 Bhat! In my experience, spending any amount of time massaging a womans' head/feet/back comes back to you ten fold in the bedroom department - western women and Thai ladies alike. Cheers I always thought the same then I met my wife............she hates massage Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
robblok Posted June 19, 2010 Share Posted June 19, 2010 Yeah, Must admit, such a relationship does sound like a pain in the butt and a potentially pricey one at that... but, staying on topic, the OP has some decent points. A friend went for a Thai massage that can turn into more than that if money is paid and you fancy the lass... him, being a broke teacher actually gave the masseuse a 30 minute massage and got a "full service body massage" for the price of a Thai massage - a saving of about 1000 Bhat! In my experience, spending any amount of time massaging a womans' head/feet/back comes back to you ten fold in the bedroom department - western women and Thai ladies alike. Cheers I always thought the same then I met my wife............she hates massage Im just too lazy to give her a massage and worry that once i start there is no end to it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Livinginexile Posted June 19, 2010 Share Posted June 19, 2010 How to train a woman? Grow a set and be a man! No prize guessing who wares the pants in that "relationship". I'm ashamed you called yourself australian Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
emsfeld Posted June 19, 2010 Share Posted June 19, 2010 I've trained her quite well. I throw a tennis ball towards the kitchen, she chases after it and comes back in a cute nurse outfit with a plate of Grapaow Gai in her hands. We are now practicing different coloured balls so that, depending on colour, the corresponding meal will be served. She is still struggling a bit with the colour-meal associations, so I hung up a few pictures in the kitchen...we're getting there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
purplehaze Posted June 19, 2010 Share Posted June 19, 2010 The first thing I taught my wife was No means f*&king No. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
robblok Posted June 19, 2010 Share Posted June 19, 2010 I've trained her quite well. I throw a tennis ball towards the kitchen, she chases after it and comes back in a cute nurse outfit with a plate of Grapaow Gai in her hands. We are now practicing different coloured balls so that, depending on colour, the corresponding meal will be served. She is still struggling a bit with the colour-meal associations, so I hung up a few pictures in the kitchen...we're getting there. So what do you do for reward.. and punishment ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SunSeek01 Posted June 19, 2010 Share Posted June 19, 2010 Imagine reading this if you have only been on holidays in Thailand, having almost nothing but fun ! I was lucky though that the first TG, that I fell hard for, took it easy on me and now we are good friends. She has saved me many headaches over my 9 visits and now that I plan to be spending extended holidays in TH, I can't seem to imagine how all the little schemes come about. However in part thanks to TV, I know they will ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cardholder Posted June 19, 2010 Share Posted June 19, 2010 How can you be with a girl if your comprehension of the Thai language is limited and her English is practically zero ? Just curious about it. Its purely sexual It sounds like more work than it is worth. Sex, "more work than it is worth?" Err, No ! Sex - the universal language. Pillow talk is great when she can't poot Angrit and you have no idea about Thai. many smiles, touchy feely and the language barriers disappear. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chonburiram Posted June 19, 2010 Share Posted June 19, 2010 stupid topic, not even funny :sleepy: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kilgore Trout Posted June 19, 2010 Share Posted June 19, 2010 "train your girlfriend"? Sounds like you would be better off getting a dog. Why don't you show some respect? It's people like you who give westerners a bad name. If you want to have a relationship with a Thai girl I suggest you find one with a similar level of education and that speaks English, or you yourself learn to speak Thai. Short of that you should pi$$ of back to where you came. Your post insults Thai people and especially Thai women (including my wife). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IanForbes Posted June 19, 2010 Share Posted June 19, 2010 Some of you guys are entirely too serious. Ozzie is just having a little fun. There is no way any man can train any woman in any country that doesn't have slavery. It's like the old saying.. A man marries a woman expecting her never to change... and she always changes. A woman marries a man expecting to change him... and he never does. Eventually, the excitement of any relationship wears off and then you just try to survive and adjust to personalities. There are lots of funny stories though, just like the ones Ozzie mentioned. The invite to go shopping, or the afternoon movies at the big mall is an obvious scam. Better just hand them a few hundred baht and be done with it. If you go with them it will cost you a few thousand. I get pleasure out of giving pleasure, so depending on my frame of mind I'll go along with their obvious schemes. I find rental ladies a whole lot cheaper in the long run. And besides, you can up grade to the latest model when the old one starts wearing out her welcome. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
t.s Posted June 19, 2010 Share Posted June 19, 2010 chocolatsteve? is that you? ignorance really must be bliss. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cdnvic Posted June 19, 2010 Share Posted June 19, 2010 "Training" a woman? The topic is as silly as it is repugnant. Closed Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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