RobRoy76 Posted June 22, 2010 Share Posted June 22, 2010 (edited) I am not sure what forum this question is best suited to so please feel free to move. This might sound a strange question for some but to me it make's sense. I hope to marry my Thai girlfriend at the end of the year. It has now come down to agreeing a sin sod, i am not for it but i understand where she is coming from, and NO i dont think i am a fool. But this is something that i have thought about for some time now. My future wife and i have been together 2 years and had ups and downs, she has recently finish university, and i do trust her. But reading though the many posts and internet forums i know that even the best girl can have interior motives and the best marriages do break down. My wife says that she wants to work in the UK when she gets a visa and is willing to pay the sin sod herself. So my idea is to get a loan in her name for the sin sod amount about 200,000 baht, then i would pay the monthly fee until she got her own job. Although because she has just finished university she does not have a job just a bit of student teaching work. Would there be any chance that she would be able to get a loan for this and then for me to make the monthly payments (from her bank account of course) They way i see it is that this will act as an insurance policy should something happen in the future, and will not put my own savings at risk. I am happy to pay the payments to start with and then once she is working i will help with them. By doing it this way it seems everybody wins. But i have no experience with Thai finance and would apprentice any help from you guys. Thank for reading i await your response Edited June 22, 2010 by RobRoy76 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
onnut Posted June 22, 2010 Share Posted June 22, 2010 Ok. 200k for sin sod. That's a big loan on it's own. Where will the rest of the money come from to pay for the wedding? My wedding cost 488k altogether. No sin sod but I had to lay out 200k for show and they gave me back after the wedding. My advice to you would be wait another year or so and save the money up. That way you get to know each other much better and don't need to take out a loan. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rizla Posted June 22, 2010 Share Posted June 22, 2010 (edited) Get married on the hush hush, as i understand it will be easier for her visa, sinsod, forget it i`ve been with my g/f since 2007, marrage and sinsod was mentioned at first but i said no thanks, and we are still together happy...dont do it you will set a president that you or she will pay for far into the future, oh and if they see money comming, they then think no need to find work.....sorry but true, card slot springs to mind...stand your ground..please:, are you scottish, robroy, if you are you already know the deal...chok dee Edited June 22, 2010 by rizla Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Garry9999 Posted June 22, 2010 Share Posted June 22, 2010 I'd recommend you don't get married until you understand Thai family structures a little better. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Archimedes Posted June 22, 2010 Share Posted June 22, 2010 They way i see it is that this will act as an insurance policy should something happen in the future, and will not put my own savings at risk. I am happy to pay the payments to start with and then once she is working i will help with them. By doing it this way it seems everybody wins. But i have no experience with Thai finance and would apprentice any help from you guys. If the first thing in your mind is to get security for yourself rather than trust in your wife to be, then its maybe time to re-thing the whole "get married" idea. First its not a very large amount asked as sin-sod, secondly if you can not trust your wife to be then why get married at all? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
robblok Posted June 23, 2010 Share Posted June 23, 2010 They way i see it is that this will act as an insurance policy should something happen in the future, and will not put my own savings at risk. I am happy to pay the payments to start with and then once she is working i will help with them. By doing it this way it seems everybody wins. But i have no experience with Thai finance and would apprentice any help from you guys. If the first thing in your mind is to get security for yourself rather than trust in your wife to be, then its maybe time to re-thing the whole "get married" idea. First its not a very large amount asked as sin-sod, secondly if you can not trust your wife to be then why get married at all? Your certainly not as smart as your name sake. Its quite normal to secure yourself even in the west (think pre nups) Why would you not make sure things are secure in Thailand. Personally i haven't paid sin sod at all and things are all great. MIL wanted it.. i did not want to give it. So in the end it did not happen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Livinginexile Posted June 23, 2010 Share Posted June 23, 2010 (edited) Ok. 200k for sin sod. That's a big loan on it's own. Where will the rest of the money come from to pay for the wedding? My wedding cost 488k altogether. No sin sod but I had to lay out 200k for show and they gave me back after the wedding. My advice to you would be wait another year or so and save the money up. That way you get to know each other much better and don't need to take out a loan. 488k for a Thai wedding They get you one way or another Edited June 23, 2010 by Livinginexile Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Loz Posted June 23, 2010 Share Posted June 23, 2010 Living in Ex. YOU ARE MY HERO RIGHT NOW! :D :D :D :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berkshire Posted June 23, 2010 Share Posted June 23, 2010 Interesting concept, the GF taking out a loan to pay for sin sod--essentially loaning you money so you can pay sin sod. And she's agreed to this? Regardless, it would be rather difficult for her to secure a loan with no income or collateral. And she would need a co-signer, a Thai person. Do you think a family member would co-sign a loan for something like this? Nice try. I'd be curious to know what the GF (and family) says about this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mahtin Posted June 23, 2010 Share Posted June 23, 2010 I'd recommend you don't get married until you understand Thai family structures a little better. Perfect. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thomo Posted June 23, 2010 Share Posted June 23, 2010 (edited) Although because she has just finished university she does not have a job just a bit of student teaching work. Tell her to get a job as a cleaner or salon girl or something to help you pay. No do. No wedding. Why do so many westerners hand their wallets and testicles to locals? Edited June 23, 2010 by thomo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kuifje Posted June 23, 2010 Share Posted June 23, 2010 Probably her whole aim is to get to the UK, all the rest is only her foreplay. She does whatever is necessary to reach her goal. Let her find first a job, because she just finished, and it will be her first real job, start up salary will be probably less than 10.000 a month. No any Thai bank will give somebody with less than 20.000 baht/month (after proof of at least 6 month) a loan of 200.000 baht (and she still needs a guaranteer). As another poster wrote, nowadays 'Sin sod' is mostly a ceremonial display on the wedding day, and is given back to the couple. Also I think you don't understand yet the Thai family strings. Today she agrees with this, tomorrow she will do and ask something else, finally you will be paying for everything. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ukrules Posted June 23, 2010 Share Posted June 23, 2010 Today she agrees with this, tomorrow she will do and ask something else, finally you will be paying for everything. At that point he can just kick her out and be done with it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mahtin Posted June 23, 2010 Share Posted June 23, 2010 (edited) [ At that point he can just kick her out and be done with it. Your avatar ill becomes you, Mr, Wilberforce. Edited June 23, 2010 by mahtin Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thomo Posted June 23, 2010 Share Posted June 23, 2010 You're going to have to say no sometime. Sooner is better than later. You'll probably be left with more cash in your wallet. Or at least owing less to the bank. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
avcomth Posted June 23, 2010 Share Posted June 23, 2010 Somebody once told me that before an Israeli guy marries a Thai woman, he asked her to sign some sort of contract that indicated that she will not get anything should their marriage come to an end. Not sure whether this kind of contract will be effective under Thai law, but you should try the Jewish ways sometimes... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobRoy76 Posted June 23, 2010 Author Share Posted June 23, 2010 Thanks for the the responses' guys. I understand that many are against the sin sod now a days, and it does seem a outdated practice. But i am neither for or against it my fiencee wants to do this and pay her self then i would back her. But the reason i am asking this idea is of course for my own protection. I dont want to put my own money at risk. Buy getting a loan in her name Should something go wrong and i say SHOULD then it would be her who would take the fall not me. I am more that willing to support my wife in other things, but the sin sod is something that she wants/feels she has to do for her family so she can deal with it. Like i say it if all went wrong then i would be able to walk away. I understand many people say wait a year or so and save. But this would mean a year apart when she could be in Scotland working plus it would still be my money at risk even if did save. My main aim in the question was to find out of the a loan would be possible if i backed my wife to start wife, you say she would need a guarantee so would her family or sister who all have full time jobs be able to act as this for her? Strange question i know, but i some case you have to think out the box. It is all to easy to say no and walk away, but i am hoping some where down the line we can reach a compromise and this way would allow us to do so. Thanks again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yabaaaa Posted June 23, 2010 Share Posted June 23, 2010 Ok. 200k for sin sod. That's a big loan on it's own. Where will the rest of the money come from to pay for the wedding? My wedding cost 488k altogether. No sin sod but I had to lay out 200k for show and they gave me back after the wedding. My advice to you would be wait another year or so and save the money up. That way you get to know each other much better and don't need to take out a loan. 488k for a Thai wedding They get you one way or another Sheesh | i cant believe how people are so happy to throw their money away..... for what???? find a girl who doesnt want money or whose parents are dead its so much easier/simpler. That's my advice.......... yeah Im sure she's "special" I got married for about 300 odd baht, that was the cost of the roadside meal for two of my wife's friends as witnesses. 4+ years later no problems. Suckers!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
avcomth Posted June 23, 2010 Share Posted June 23, 2010 Thanks for the the responses' guys. I understand that many are against the sin sod now a days, and it does seem a outdated practice. But i am neither for or against it my fiencee wants to do this and pay her self then i would back her. But the reason i am asking this idea is of course for my own protection. I dont want to put my own money at risk. Buy getting a loan in her name Should something go wrong and i say SHOULD then it would be her who would take the fall not me. I am more that willing to support my wife in other things, but the sin sod is something that she wants/feels she has to do for her family so she can deal with it. Like i say it if all went wrong then i would be able to walk away. I understand many people say wait a year or so and save. But this would mean a year apart when she could be in Scotland working plus it would still be my money at risk even if did save. My main aim in the question was to find out of the a loan would be possible if i backed my wife to start wife, you say she would need a guarantee so would her family or sister who all have full time jobs be able to act as this for her? Strange question i know, but i some case you have to think out the box. It is all to easy to say no and walk away, but i am hoping some where down the line we can reach a compromise and this way would allow us to do so. Thanks again. From information you've given about your wife's current status. The answer is simply 'NO'. No bank in Thailand will grant such loan to an individual who hasn't been working in a well established company for at least 6 months. I will be prepared to give you 10,000 Baht if your wife can get a loan. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobRoy76 Posted June 23, 2010 Author Share Posted June 23, 2010 Thanks for that Avcomth i might hold you to that I am sure that we will find away Cheers Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
onnut Posted June 23, 2010 Share Posted June 23, 2010 Ok. 200k for sin sod. That's a big loan on it's own. Where will the rest of the money come from to pay for the wedding? My wedding cost 488k altogether. No sin sod but I had to lay out 200k for show and they gave me back after the wedding. My advice to you would be wait another year or so and save the money up. That way you get to know each other much better and don't need to take out a loan. 488k for a Thai wedding They get you one way or another Was a nice wedding, that was for the lot. Rings, dresses, suits, food and Booze, transport, hotels, ceremony and reception. 5 years ago and both still very much in love and heading the right direction. We also have a two year old boy now. All very much worth it. No sin sod, I think I did well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
onnut Posted June 23, 2010 Share Posted June 23, 2010 Ok. 200k for sin sod. That's a big loan on it's own. Where will the rest of the money come from to pay for the wedding? My wedding cost 488k altogether. No sin sod but I had to lay out 200k for show and they gave me back after the wedding. My advice to you would be wait another year or so and save the money up. That way you get to know each other much better and don't need to take out a loan. 488k for a Thai wedding They get you one way or another Sheesh | i cant believe how people are so happy to throw their money away..... for what???? find a girl who doesnt want money or whose parents are dead its so much easier/simpler. That's my advice.......... yeah Im sure she's "special" I got married for about 300 odd baht, that was the cost of the roadside meal for two of my wife's friends as witnesses. 4+ years later no problems. Suckers!! Ummm! I'm not a teacher and so can afford to pay more for a special day. We also had a decent buffet meal with our guests, After all it's a wedding and we plan to spend the rest of our lives together. So why not do it properly? I also did not marry a bar girl so have no reason to suspect foul play on her side. Her family asked for 200k for show as part of the traditional ceremony and gave it back. Also we were both 31 at the time so I am not some 50 year old prick that's been divorced and cleaned out 3 times so have no reason to feel like I shouldn't give my all in this marriage. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cdnvic Posted June 23, 2010 Share Posted June 23, 2010 There's no reason at all to berate each other over how you chose to go about getting married. Just state your point without the bluster please. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berkshire Posted June 24, 2010 Share Posted June 24, 2010 Thanks for the the responses' guys. I understand that many are against the sin sod now a days, and it does seem a outdated practice. But i am neither for or against it my fiencee wants to do this and pay her self then i would back her. But the reason i am asking this idea is of course for my own protection. I dont want to put my own money at risk. Buy getting a loan in her name Should something go wrong and i say SHOULD then it would be her who would take the fall not me. I am more that willing to support my wife in other things, but the sin sod is something that she wants/feels she has to do for her family so she can deal with it. Like i say it if all went wrong then i would be able to walk away. I understand many people say wait a year or so and save. But this would mean a year apart when she could be in Scotland working plus it would still be my money at risk even if did save. My main aim in the question was to find out of the a loan would be possible if i backed my wife to start wife, you say she would need a guarantee so would her family or sister who all have full time jobs be able to act as this for her? Strange question i know, but i some case you have to think out the box. It is all to easy to say no and walk away, but i am hoping some where down the line we can reach a compromise and this way would allow us to do so. Thanks again. RR76, please answer the question: Has your GF/family agreed to this? If not, I think you're just spinning your wheels here if you haven't even gotten the ok from the main principals. The bottom line is you're basically asking your girlfriend for a loan so you can pay sin sod, and you "may" pay her back eventually. I can't believe your GF/family would fall for this scheme. The answer to your question is "no," she will not be able to get a loan with no income/collateral. And I can't believe anyone would co-sign for such a loan, not even family. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Groongthep Posted June 24, 2010 Share Posted June 24, 2010 No Thai bank will give somebody with less than 20.000 baht/month (after proof of at least 6 month) a loan of 200.000 baht Correct. Might as well forget it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mjnaus Posted June 24, 2010 Share Posted June 24, 2010 Ok. 200k for sin sod. That's a big loan on it's own. Where will the rest of the money come from to pay for the wedding? My wedding cost 488k altogether. No sin sod but I had to lay out 200k for show and they gave me back after the wedding. My advice to you would be wait another year or so and save the money up. That way you get to know each other much better and don't need to take out a loan. 488k for a Thai wedding They get you one way or another Sheesh | i cant believe how people are so happy to throw their money away..... for what???? find a girl who doesnt want money or whose parents are dead its so much easier/simpler. That's my advice.......... yeah Im sure she's "special" I got married for about 300 odd baht, that was the cost of the roadside meal for two of my wife's friends as witnesses. 4+ years later no problems. Suckers!! You do realize there are also people out there who do have $$ and who are happy to spend some on a nice wedding? We're not all cheap... no offense Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jackdawson Posted June 24, 2010 Share Posted June 24, 2010 (edited) to get a loan in her name for the sin sod amount who says romance is dead ? ps please let us know how ur beloved and more importantly her mom react to this idea (paying their own sinsot w/ interest over time) pss DESPITE what you read here , they do do sinsot here . and in the grand scope of things , 200,000 is peanuts (for the privilege and pleasure of living with a young thai woman AND making her mom happy--for a while at least). if ur brain / soul is telling you that privilege and pleasure is not worth 200,000, well, that' something different . personally, i'd hate to pay sinsot and have that be the only thing i think about when i look at it's recepient Edited June 24, 2010 by jackdawson Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chunky1 Posted June 24, 2010 Share Posted June 24, 2010 ulterior. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
robblok Posted June 24, 2010 Share Posted June 24, 2010 Ok. 200k for sin sod. That's a big loan on it's own. Where will the rest of the money come from to pay for the wedding? My wedding cost 488k altogether. No sin sod but I had to lay out 200k for show and they gave me back after the wedding. My advice to you would be wait another year or so and save the money up. That way you get to know each other much better and don't need to take out a loan. 488k for a Thai wedding They get you one way or another Sheesh | i cant believe how people are so happy to throw their money away..... for what???? find a girl who doesnt want money or whose parents are dead its so much easier/simpler. That's my advice.......... yeah Im sure she's "special" I got married for about 300 odd baht, that was the cost of the roadside meal for two of my wife's friends as witnesses. 4+ years later no problems. Suckers!! You do realize there are also people out there who do have $$ and who are happy to spend some on a nice wedding? We're not all cheap... no offense I also paid a few hundred baht for the wedding and im not a teacher. I make decent money now, still I would not throw money around just for a stupid wedding. For me a wedding is nothing more then a piece of paper. But that is for everyone to decide, i think i did good. The gf thought she did good. No need to have a big wedding to impress people (MIL wanted it and sin sod too) But we did not. Better to spend the money on a holiday for ourselves and our house. But everyone makes their own choices and as long as your happy with your choices life is good. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jts-khorat Posted June 24, 2010 Share Posted June 24, 2010 The usual way to get enough money together for the sin sod is to go to the local loan shark: as the money is only needed for the days of the ceremony and then handed back, the cost is acceptable and securities for the family of a university-educated girl should be not difficult to get. Also some goldshops will loan out gold pretty much under the same idea. It might not be a bad idea ensuring the help of a member of the family to make this cost-effective, the money is purely for show anyway. Of course, somebody must at least come up with the money for the festivities. Overthinking it with loans from a bank seems not necessary at all. I am assuming here the OP is aware that he will get the sin sod back. If not, he is already in to be scammed!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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