How Nasty Can A Neighbor Get?

[CMX]

"moo-barn" "class" "status"

I know very little about Thailand and its people. Were I casting a film in the U.S. that involved such behaviours, however, I'd probably make the rumor-mongers ill-educated types, perhaps overweight or unattractive in some way. I'd give them accents indicating rural backgrounds - Oklahoma or "southern" but exaggerated. Or featuring some other characteristic, demonstrating unhappy people.

I associate (for no valid reason) people who amuse themselves in these lies with ill-educated people. I wonder if anyone in their anecdotes can estimate the educational level of the folks (mostly or all women?) who are telling these crooked tales? Even if true, are there exceptions? Is this village rather more than city life?

I mean, have they nothing more serious to occupy their time? Seems as if every one is so deeply immersed in close personal interactions (and animosities) that they have not a sense of greater perspective, maybe never had one? It's probably fair to say to them, "Get a life!" - right?

Edited December 6, 2010 by CMX

[mccw]

I was living and working in Norfolk for a few months. Basically ended up the wrong side of the chain ferry to my village on the broads after the service had ceased. So I stopped for a couple beers to find out the route to get to the next bridge. Long story short,,,, 2 days later my uncles wife call me up (their local I was drinking in but people didn't know) asking why people down the pub saying this crazy southerner orders pints n a whiskey and starts waving around some huge knife cursing and threating locals for closing down the ferry. Riddiculass rumour mill. It's all about bored sad people trying to make their lives more interesting.

[orang37]

It doesn't actually surprise me. Silly women do stupid things all the time that have no bearing on reality or the consequences of their own actions. Jealousy is usually the motive. Or, it's the "woman scorned" syndrome.

Sawasdee Khrup, Khun IanForbes,

Are you saying that women are more silly, or do more stupid things that have no bearing on reality, or have less concern with the consequences of their actions ... than men ? Everywhere, or just in Thailand ?

Are you saying jealous behavior by males is qualitatively different from jealous behavior by females ? Are you saying a "rejected" male would not react or behave in the same way as a "rejected" female ? Everywhere, or just in Thailand ?

Or, perhaps, are you saying that male behaviors that are expressions of "silly, stupid, jealous," etc., just often happen to be different than those expressed by females. Everywhere, or just in Thailand ?

Or, perhaps, are you saying that these comments are describing female behavior in Thai culture as you have experienced it, or what you personally have observed in Thailand ? If this is the case, then do you think it is possible that the female behavior you experienced/observed here is related to the social types of Thai women you know and regularly socialize with ?

All these comments would have been widely believed by many males in the 1950's, where I grew up in the USA, and not just by the "lower" socio-economic classes, or the uneducated, either; they would have been as middle-class for America's 1950's ... and for many years later ... as apple pie.

A question ... to which we have no answer: in what cases, situations, in Thailand, in a culture in general that loves "sanook," and "talok" (fun, joking) but is exquisitely sensitive to "face," can you distinguish between social phenomena, as described by SB here as:

1. malignant gossip

a. which is part of "human nature" broadly defined ?

b. which is a reflection of modal identity in Thailand.

c. which is a reflection of the cultural change and displacment as modal Thai identity encounters ... drum roll ... Farangs with $.

d. which is done on the spur of the moment because "they can get away with it" (opportunity, vulnerability) ?

2. practical joke : would love to read a good article by a Thai or foreign social scientist, ethnographer, etc. on this aspect of Thai life.

3. an action done with "negative intention:" perhaps indicating that SB or wife have somehow made an "enemy" in the neighborhood. If that were the case, we would find this event "meaningful" in the sense that it might alert us to potential danger or future conflict.

To what extent does what happened in this incident reflect anything uniquely Thai ?

Then, we think you'd also have to consider if elaborating (perhaps exaggerating) such stories involving such behavior by females, where there is a Thai/Farang relationship or marriage might be a phenomenon which is related to patterns of male Farang gossip about Thai women among certain social groups of Farangs ?

Or you could, we guess, take a "Buddhist" view, and say that all these phenomena are essentially meaningless, all driven by the same engine: desire, or greed: all failing to follow the "precepts" of "right action," and "right speech."

You'll note that in all these comments we've danced around making any statement about what we think/believe is true, in Thailand, or in general, about human males and females and gossip, practical joking, nasty japes with intent to disturb or harm, etc. That's a vice we gave up with the help of our soul-and-mind melding with escaped Orangutan #37 which rescued us both from absolute death (although Orang's physical body had to go).

We will say, however, that the most stupid behaviors we have ever seen in Thailand (or anywhere) have been "performed" by Farangs, including ourself(ves).

As a reminder of how culture can come into play in rapid changes in Asian male identity across generations (in this case Japanese), we think you may enjoy : Otaku

All of the above will be on the one question on the final exam, but we do expect your essay to be original and unique

best, ~o:37;

p.s. The stupid behavior we try to avoid the most right now is: looking in the mirror.