Having A Katoey Gf, How Thai People Will React?

[AlexLah]

Just want to know how Thai people will react while I introduce my GF being a Transgendered.]

KR Alex

[BambinA]

well, IMHO ... if your GF look too feminine..well no need to tell other people about her past. There is no reason to tell people..when you have a good time or bad time, its just you and your GF who take care each other.. and just the 2 of you guys will stay together .. so u'd care your feeling and your GF more than care other people..

i have a female friend .. she is not a lesbian..but one day she fall in love with a girl..so i ask her ..how come?

she said ..she love a person that have character like this .. even this person is male or female .. she love the person from what he/she does , its not about what he/she is..

(i like her thought)

and for my experience when i had BFs.. people get it..( they just think im a genetic girl)

goodluck

Bambi

Edited November 8, 2005 by BambinA

[meadish_sweetball]

Moving this to the general forum as it is not really a gay forum-specific topic.

[The Gentleman Scamp]

Just want to know how Thai people will react while I introduce my GF being a Transgendered.]

There will be little or no reaction as they will not be shocked or have any issues with it, which I doubt would be the case if you were introducing her back in your own country.

[StateSix]

And if they do have a problem, it is their problem and they are not worth knowing anyway

Good luck

[awarrumbungle]

There will be little or no reaction as they will not be shocked or have any issues with it, which I doubt would be the case if you were introducing her back in your own country.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

That doesn't sound like the Thailand I know. Good luck, hope you and her have tough skin.

[Wolfie]

TGS is a past master on peoples reactions to Katoey GF's

[Sir Burr]

and for my experience when  i had BFs.. people  get it..( they just  think im a  genetic girl)

Checking to make sure she doesn't have a Y chromosome.

Forget adam's apple, timbre of voice, size of feet, mannerisms etc.

I have found only one sure-fire way to tell.

The palm of the hand of a genetic male is roughly square shaped. A genetic female's palm is narrower making a rectangle.

[meadish_sweetball]

Ok Sir Burr... I have to bite.

"I have only found one surefire way to tell..."

The way you put it, it sounds like you've done extensive research on the subject. If it isnt too private, would you mind letting us know how you came to these insights?

BTW, Alex, to the best of my knowledge (I have had a friend with a ladyboy girlfriend, but that is the only direct experience I have of the matter):

Most Thai people will not say anything, and will be totally normal, but some may think things to themselves, or talk about it when you are not around.

Either way, you should try not to worry about it. If you and your GF are happy with your decision, that is what matters.

I think you will find enough tolerant people along the way to make up for the ones who are not.

Good luck.

[The Gentleman Scamp]

TGS is a past master on peoples reactions to Katoey GF's 

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I remember thinking she was too good to be true.

So I hadn't just cause to envy you at all.

[Morden]

Just want to know how Thai people will react while I introduce my GF being a Transgendered.]

KR Alex

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

You probably won't have to much of a problem in LOS because people either won't mind or will be too polite to express or otherwise show any prejudice. Other countries may be different.

I hope that there's not too big an age difference between you, though. You may have seen from other current threads that that really does upset some people!!

[Sir Burr]

Ok Sir Burr... I have to bite.

"I have only found one surefire way to tell..."

The way you put it, it sounds like you've done extensive research on the subject. If it isnt too private, would you mind letting us know how you came to these insights?

Meadish,

No, not extensive research. Been in SE Asia for 25 years now, in that time you inevitably get introduced to lady-boys by other people (who know, or, don't know) and you see a fair few as you go about your business, they are represented in all walks of life.

In all the time I have spent here I have only seen two lady-boys that would fool most people. No adam's apple, no deep voice, small feet and no over the top female mannerisms. Completely indistinguishable from the real McCoy, except for the hands; a feature that cannot be surgically altered.

I didn't come up with this check myself, somebody told me, but, it definitely works.

[daleyboy]

Ok Sir Burr... I have to bite.

"I have only found one surefire way to tell..."

The way you put it, it sounds like you've done extensive research on the subject. If it isnt too private, would you mind letting us know how you came to these insights?

Meadish,

No, not extensive research. Been in SE Asia for 25 years now, in that time you inevitably get introduced to lady-boys by other people (who know, or, don't know) and you see a fair few as you go about your business, they are represented in all walks of life.

In all the time I have spent here I have only seen two lady-boys that would fool most people. No adam's apple, no deep voice, small feet and no over the top female mannerisms. Completely indistinguishable from the real McCoy, except for the hands; a feature that cannot be surgically altered.

I didn't come up with this check myself, somebody told me, but, it definitely works.

Sounds like pretty in depth research to me

[britmaveric]

No surprise really! However that being said - how does bring up one has a transgendered bf/gf in a convo to someone? "Hello I'd like you to meet Nok - she is a katoey!"

[meadish_sweetball]

Thanks for sharing, Sir Burr. Will put it to the test next time I have the chance.

[Sir Burr]

Sounds like pretty in depth research to me

No, as I've already said, someone told me. I'm the beneficiary of somebody elses extensive research.

Anyway, I think it's a very useful factoid.

Bet half you guys have already checked your missus's palm to see if it's true haven't you?

[daleyboy]

Sounds like pretty in depth research to me

No, as I've already said, someone told me. I'm the beneficiary of somebody elses extensive research.

Anyway, I think it's a very useful factoid.

Bet half you guys have already checked your missus's palm to see if it's true haven't you?

No i just check to make sure there not hairy.

Old Chinese proverb say "lady with small hand make cock look big"

[AlexLah]

Hi all,

Thanks for the reactions,

So I guess it won't be much of a problem in Thailand when I have a TG GF.

Just thinking too mut.

KR,

Alex

[PeaceBlondie]

If by 'trans-gendered' you mean your girlfriend formerly was a male and has now surgically been changed into a female with appropriate sex organs and mammaries, she's a woman. Now, maybe the people down at the govt. ID office won't change the gender on her ID, but who's to notice?

If it's as I just outlined, your girlfriend is now a female, and there's nothing unusual about it. She's just a lady with a low voice; there are plenty of them around the world. So, I wouldn't mention it. I might even avoid starting sentences such as, "When Sarah used to be a boy...."

P.S. And that's perhaps why the moderator moved this out of the Gay section. Your girlfriend is not gay. She's a female who wants to be with a man. I'm not sure if the term 'katoey' should be applied to her anymore; she's reached her goal of being a woman. Enjoy her as such, unless you get some thrill out of remembering that she used to be a boy.

Why, just an hour ago, here in Malaysia, I was chatting and flirting with a young Asian with flat chest and short hair. When the person realized I was asking him out for a date, the person replied, "I'm a girl!" I apologized, saying that I kind of like boys who look like girls who look like boys, but at the end of the night, they need to be boys. She understood and promised to find me a young man-man.

Edited November 8, 2005 by PeaceBlondie

[Darkling]

Sounds like pretty in depth research to me

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

No, as I've already said, someone told me. I'm the beneficiary of somebody elses extensive research.

Anyway, I think it's a very useful factoid.

Bet half you guys have already checked your missus's palm to see if it's true haven't you?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

[taxexile]

last year when i lived on samui , in the house next to mine was a falang guy shacked up with a katoey , they made for very good neighbours , both of them were outgoing and friendly people , her ironing was world class and we got on well with them , she divulged all the gory details about her surgical conversion to katoeydom and why she wanted to go that route and lots of other interesting stuff about the nether world that they exist in.

the guy was madly in love with her and wanted to take her back to his home country etc.etc.etc.

and although the thais in the area accepted her like a long lost sister or cousin and would spend hours gossiping with her and cooking food together , they would neverthess quietly ask me when no one else was around what was wrong with the falang , why , how , what for and are there many wierd falangs like that in my country etc.etc.

she was accepted without question , it was the falang who was the oddity for being with her.

[BambinA]

@PeaceBlondie ,well said

@taxexile , good story

Sexual confusion and disorientation.

Guys ask me for advice. "I met this transsexual woman at a club and I am really attracted to her but I am concerned that it means I am gay or something. Am I?"

Some careful dialogue with the guy usually uncovers the fact that he was very attracted to the TS's femininity. Her look, her voice, her movement, her laugh, her smile, her scent, and all those other feminine cues that trigger interest and a masculine response from a guy. Gay guys are not attracted to those attributes.

Therefore, if a straight man finds himself interested in a pre-op transsexual and is experiencing  some confusion as a result, then he needs to consider exactly what it is about her that is attracting him. If it's her femininity, then he's not responding like a gay man would, and thus shouldn't worry about whether he's "turning gay." If the guy can accept that he is attracted to a somewhat different kind of woman and still wants to pursue it, take it just one step at a time.

Take her out to dinner or a movie. Talk to her about whatever, listen to her words. Look into her eyes. Can he get lost in her eyes, as he can with a GG? Can he relax around her and just enjoy being with her, as if she were a GG? If so, take one more step. Hold hands, kiss her good-night. In other words, treat her like he would any GG date, at a pace that he can handle, given his concerns. Easy!

FROM tsgirlfriend.com

[OxfordWill]

You'll have significant peace of mind for the large part Alex - enjoy it to the full!

[agsnowdon]

@PeaceBlondie ,well said

@taxexile , good story

Sexual confusion and disorientation.

Guys ask me for advice. "I met this transsexual woman at a club and I am really attracted to her but I am concerned that it means I am gay or something. Am I?"

Some careful dialogue with the guy usually uncovers the fact that he was very attracted to the TS's femininity. Her look, her voice, her movement, her laugh, her smile, her scent, and all those other feminine cues that trigger interest and a masculine response from a guy. Gay guys are not attracted to those attributes.

Therefore, if a straight man finds himself interested in a pre-op transsexual and is experiencing  some confusion as a result, then he needs to consider exactly what it is about her that is attracting him. If it's her femininity, then he's not responding like a gay man would, and thus shouldn't worry about whether he's "turning gay." If the guy can accept that he is attracted to a somewhat different kind of woman and still wants to pursue it, take it just one step at a time.

Take her out to dinner or a movie. Talk to her about whatever, listen to her words. Look into her eyes. Can he get lost in her eyes, as he can with a GG? Can he relax around her and just enjoy being with her, as if she were a GG? If so, take one more step. Hold hands, kiss her good-night. In other words, treat her like he would any GG date, at a pace that he can handle, given his concerns. Easy!

FROM tsgirlfriend.com

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

well said Bamb

Hope your ok

Ash

[ben01]

Ok Sir Burr... I have to bite.

"I have only found one surefire way to tell..."

The way you put it, it sounds like you've done extensive research on the subject. If it isnt too private, would you mind letting us know how you came to these insights?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Meadish,

No, not extensive research. Been in SE Asia for 25 years now, in that time you inevitably get introduced to lady-boys by other people (who know, or, don't know) and you see a fair few as you go about your business, they are represented in all walks of life.

In all the time I have spent here I have only seen two lady-boys that would fool most people. No adam's apple, no deep voice, small feet and no over the top female mannerisms. Completely indistinguishable from the real McCoy, except for the hands; a feature that cannot be surgically altered.

I didn't come up with this check myself, somebody told me, but, it definitely works.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Sounds like pretty in depth research to me

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

wonder what 'the hand ' was donig so close to person....or what it was wrapped around..

[The Coder]

In all the time I have spent here I have only seen two lady-boys that would fool most people.

...except for the hands...this check...definitely works.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Sorry, but you just cannot be 100% sure there were 2. I might add your vulnerability to missing them is greater than others because if one has feminine hands you will be less likely to make the assocation. Everyone seems to have their own sure fire test, and they all invariably fail as far as I can tell. Hands and feet are a good one and usually work, but not always. Some are so convincing that if you come into conact with them for a brief time, they will fly right under the radar without you ever knowing; people who feel otherwise are just fooling themselves. Conversely, people at times incorrectly classify real girls as katoeys because of their faulty detection methods. And once they make this (incorrect) association they flatly refuse to be proven otherwise. I rest my case that if there was a simple test that works, everyone would be using it. There isn't!

To the OP, I think how the katoey presents herself will be the most important factor, just as with girls.

Last to meadish, good job moving this out of the gay forum. I was pleasantly surprised by that because I would have expected to see it move the opposite direction.

[siamesekitty]

Most Thai people would be too polite to say anything to your face, but if your GF is obviously katoey-looking/sounding they might be "kit nai jai" (thinking inside), or discuss it later when you're not around.

They might also wonder (but dare not ask) whether you are aware that she is a katoey or not. Some, meaning well, might quietly inform you in private.

Good luck to you and your GF naka!

Edited November 8, 2005 by siamesekitty

[Dickie_Doo]

I kind of like boys who look like girls who look like boys, but at the end of the night, they need to be boys. She understood and promised to find me a young man-man.

What if it was a girl who looked like a boy who looked like a girl,

...and who was also transgendered.

[chuchok]

and for my experience when  i had BFs.. people  get it..( they just  think im a  genetic girl)

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Checking to make sure she doesn't have a Y chromosome.

Forget adam's apple, timbre of voice, size of feet, mannerisms etc.

I have found only one sure-fire way to tell.

The palm of the hand of a genetic male is roughly square shaped. A genetic female's palm is narrower making a rectangle.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

There is a slightly different way than that I think.Believe it or not, Doctors think it's all to do with the amount of testostrone that people recieve while in the womb.This causes a difference in the length of the index and 3rd finger in males.In females, these two fingers are about the same length.

Edited November 8, 2005 by chuchok

[daleyboy]

At the end of the day it shouldnt matter if you are male/female fat/thin tall/short black/white, as long as you are both happy, dont worry what anyone else thinks. I have lost a few "so called" friends when i told them i had got married to a Thai girl, but in the end it is not them i share my life and secrets with, its not them i share my bed with, and its not them i goto when i want some loving

Learn to be thicker skinned, otherwise i dont think your relationship will last.