To Share Or Not To Share

[Forethat]

It seems the rule is that it's the culture of the country of residence that applies. We have many friends, mix couple Thai/western, living abroad, in "farang land", UK, Canada, Australia ... and they usually live according to western culture . For couple living in Asia, Thailand but also neighboring countries, Thai rules apply.

I think it has to do with peer pressure. It's more easy to have someone accept a culture when all the neighbors share the same rules.

Sounds like a reasonable and fair conclusion. What if they change country of residence, does the rules change as well..?

[Moonrakers]

It's never entered my head as to how the contributions are split. Paying for stuff just happens from either myself or my wife automatically. For instance, last week our health insurance renewals dropped through the post and I said to my wife " If you're going into town just sort this out will you?" while later in the week I noticed the car needed a new set of front tyres so I just ran to the garage myself.

Same here

Money is just a resource with which to get what we need/want. You'll never catch me putting any monetary value on any relationship, I find that creepy.

[F1fanatic]

It's never entered my head as to how the contributions are split. Paying for stuff just happens from either myself or my wife automatically. For instance, last week our health insurance renewals dropped through the post and I said to my wife " If you're going into town just sort this out will you?" while later in the week I noticed the car needed a new set of front tyres so I just ran to the garage myself.

Same here

Money is just a resource with which to get what we need/want. You'll never catch me putting any monetary value on any relationship, I find that creepy.

Exactly, which is why married couples have joint bank accounts. Both salaries are paid into that account and expenses are paid from it.

It works as both husband and wife take shared responsibility for expenditure.

As soon as one party is 'not happy' with a joint bank account, a "monetary value" is being put on the relationship.

[robblok]

Ah someone who pays for girls to stay with him how queer. I knew you would come your a true defender of sex pats.

It makes me in a normal relation where everyone contributes to the relation. If i paid id feel that she is with me for money (as many girls are with older ugly guys). Now at least i know its not money that draws her to me. Its genuine.

You are looking at it totally wrong, she is just paying her share of expenses as is normal in a relation. If there are reasons for her not to work (taking care of kids ect.) The guy pays it all. But if she is able to work why not contribute ?

Look that you are trying to get a clean conscience about paying a girl of to stay with you and thinking because your such a "hansum guy" is ok with me. Don't let reality hit you to hard.

Robblok, normal in Thailand is the man pays the bills and if the lady works she keeps her own money. It seems normal to me also as my mother or grandmother never worked outside the home. Dad and grandfather paid the bills. What is normal to you is not necessarily normal to everyone.

Perhaps you did not understand what I was saying. I am not talking about an allowance. Most men in Thailand pay the rent, food, utility bills etc... (and to show you how generous I can be in a discussion lets not even say most but a large number of both Thai and Farang pay the household bills.)

In your case you are making (you said you would leave if she didn't pay) her give you money for the household bills because she is not young and attractive. You said, quote “I would only pay to support an 18 yr old drop dead gorgeous coyote dancer.”

Different circles Kerry different circles. I am talking about girls that are educated and studied so they could make money. They are changing, not all of them of course but most are.

I seen it with all my friends and her friends, they share in the costs. No they are not Hi so Thai/Chinese girls.

I would only support a woman if there was a real big age gap and she was drop dead gorgeous. The point i make here is that it would not be a wife it would be a paid live in.

I understand what you said my only query is why are you making her support you? I am not talking about an allowance but contribution to the household expenses.

Thai women are a market and Farang men are a market. There are different segments of the market, some upscale and some downscale.

An attractive educated Thai women can assume that she will have a man who pays the bills especially if it is a Farang.

I think you are thinking like a Farang and not a Thai. The Thai men I know pay the food and rent.

To be sure not all but a majority. I live with a Thai Engineer I pay the rent and utilities, I always have both in Thailand and the West.

I would suggest if you can't pay the household bills that you can't afford a wife in Thailand.

You got strange reasoning Kerry, she is not supporting me at all. If i were alone i had less cost then i do now. I don't need a girl to support me i can easily pay for it all. But this way i know its love and not greed. I understand you defending this to ease your conscience telling yourself your so hansum and she is not staying with you for the money.

Of course im thinking like a farang, i am a farang. Why would i give up my identity. If a Thai girl chooses a farang she did not choose a Thai. If she wants Thai style choose a Thai. (nice isn't it reversing your argument).

But there is no such thing as a generic answer, like i said b4 if a guy is a pensioner or if there are kids involved totally different rules aply. But if your both working both can contribute to the household its only fair. I would also support a gf / wife to set up a business that is nice and can make some money so she is independent. I think it scares a lot of guys independent woman so they like to say they pay it all and keep power.

I don't see why a wife who is a member of the household should be excluded from paying (if she has a job) Unless you don't see her as a member of your household but as a live in gf you rent.

Its in a way the same as giving an allowance because it saves her money in an indirect way.

[robblok]

Clearly, this is a matter of cultural differences. Problem is, many Farangs doesn't know which culture to apply, and an all fairness who can blame them? Is there a rule somewhere that says you have to live according to Thai culture because you married a Thai national..? What if the couple moves to Farang-land, does the culture preference change...?

It seems the rule is that it's the culture of the country of residence that applies. We have many friends, mix couple Thai/western, living abroad, in "farang land", UK, Canada, Australia ... and they usually live according to western culture . For couple living in Asia, Thailand but also neighboring countries, Thai rules apply.

I think it has to do with peer pressure. It's more easy to have someone accept a culture when all the neighbors share the same rules.

Good thing i don't care about peer pressure. But just think of it this way if a Thai girl wanted everything Thai and Thai standards she could marry a Thai instead of a farang.

This argument goes both ways of course. But both should give and take a bit. I just see a household as an economic unit where everyone contributes.

It would feel real strange to see one person pay it all while the other keeps all the money for him / her self.

[MidoriApple]

It's never entered my head as to how the contributions are split. Paying for stuff just happens from either myself or my wife automatically. For instance, last week our health insurance renewals dropped through the post and I said to my wife " If you're going into town just sort this out will you?" while later in the week I noticed the car needed a new set of front tyres so I just ran to the garage myself.

Same here

Money is just a resource with which to get what we need/want. You'll never catch me putting any monetary value on any relationship, I find that creepy.

Exactly, which is why married couples have joint bank accounts. Both salaries are paid into that account and expenses are paid from it.

It works as both husband and wife take shared responsibility for expenditure.

As soon as one party is 'not happy' with a joint bank account, a "monetary value" is being put on the relationship.

umm..interesting thread, actually.

Have never spoken about this with him for me, not yet living together, so far

but my idea... I will want to share my income to use in our house expenditure. Sure I cannot let him has no money to have leisure himself, whilst I have too much to spend. Maybe is not 50-50, up to one who has more income, then should pay more.

I think it depends, not always that Thai couple, the husbands have to pay all, it is yes in the past, since most of the wives would be home and took care of house and kids..

As seen most of my friends, may be husbands pay for house, bills, but wives will also pay for food, groceries, the dining-out, and if they have kids, the wives will also pay for the kids' school and toys.

I agree with F1fanatic... maybe the joint account is good idea. Well, I am sure my BF will let me being our house's bookkeeper.. and of course, I am one who hold the ATM..

[JurgenG]

Ah someone who pays for girls to stay with him how queer. I knew you would come your a true defender of sex pats.

It makes me in a normal relation where everyone contributes to the relation. If i paid id feel that she is with me for money (as many girls are with older ugly guys). Now at least i know its not money that draws her to me. Its genuine.

You are looking at it totally wrong, she is just paying her share of expenses as is normal in a relation. If there are reasons for her not to work (taking care of kids ect.) The guy pays it all. But if she is able to work why not contribute ?

Look that you are trying to get a clean conscience about paying a girl of to stay with you and thinking because your such a "hansum guy" is ok with me. Don't let reality hit you to hard.

Robblok, normal in Thailand is the man pays the bills and if the lady works she keeps her own money. It seems normal to me also as my mother or grandmother never worked outside the home. Dad and grandfather paid the bills. What is normal to you is not necessarily normal to everyone.

Perhaps you did not understand what I was saying. I am not talking about an allowance. Most men in Thailand pay the rent, food, utility bills etc... (and to show you how generous I can be in a discussion lets not even say most but a large number of both Thai and Farang pay the household bills.)

In your case you are making (you said you would leave if she didn't pay) her give you money for the household bills because she is not young and attractive. You said, quote "I would only pay to support an 18 yr old drop dead gorgeous coyote dancer."

Different circles Kerry different circles. I am talking about girls that are educated and studied so they could make money. They are changing, not all of them of course but most are.

I seen it with all my friends and her friends, they share in the costs. No they are not Hi so Thai/Chinese girls.

I would only support a woman if there was a real big age gap and she was drop dead gorgeous. The point i make here is that it would not be a wife it would be a paid live in.

I understand what you said my only query is why are you making her support you? I am not talking about an allowance but contribution to the household expenses.

Thai women are a market and Farang men are a market. There are different segments of the market, some upscale and some downscale.

An attractive educated Thai women can assume that she will have a man who pays the bills especially if it is a Farang.

I think you are thinking like a Farang and not a Thai. The Thai men I know pay the food and rent.

To be sure not all but a majority. I live with a Thai Engineer I pay the rent and utilities, I always have both in Thailand and the West.

I would suggest if you can't pay the household bills that you can't afford a wife in Thailand.

I understand what you say and kind of agree. You marry a Thai woman, it's her culture, its part of the package, if you don't like it, you shouldn't marry her.

But what if your wife, who has a very good salary and a lot of savings because she doesn't have to pay for anything, one day decides to buy a flat. And says the flat will be hers and hers only because she bought it with her saving. How will you react ?

It's not a rhetorical question as it's just what happent to a friend of us.

It was our main subject of discussion for lunch last Sunday. The debate went like this :

- It's fair, it's her saving, the flat belongs to her.

- It's not fair, she can save so much money because her husband pay for everything. To be fair, she should share.

- It's the husband duty to provide his wife with the living standard she is entitled to. He cannot use that as an argument to ask for half of her flat

From there we went nowhere and at the end we just agree to disagree.

Edited September 27, 2011 by JurgenG

[nocturn]

Call me old fashioned but I still subscribe to the understanding a man is the bread winner and the wife is the caregiver.

So with that in mind when a man gets a good woman who will nurture him and take good care of him, he should in return pay the bills.My mother never had to work outside the home and I didnot grow up in Thailand

It bothers me guys come here and talk up how cheap it is to live here, then still want the wife to assist with home costs.

The only way I can see both sharing is if they are both young professionals and are persueing careers. In the average household a good wife can be kept quite busy just keeping things in order.

In my humble opinion if you really love the woman and want a good home life together, the woman should stay home and be taken care of by her husband.

mate, you would be lucky to be old fashioned, the reality is you are just old.

if you are with someone with an equivalent social status and a modicum of pride, these questions don't even arise.

[Misterwolf]

Love how some of you have this notion that there is an exclusive "Thai" culture and exclusive "farang" culture of doing things.

there is not and a lot depends on the socio economic standing of the couple wherever they may be living.

<deleted> there are farang couples in farang land still today where the wife/partner stays home and hubby pays for everything just like there are farang/thai or thai/thai couples in thailand where the same principle exists.

You can draw any type of permutation to the above, ie wife working/not working, earning crap money, earning heaps and it could be applicable to either thailand or farang land.

Do what makes you happy and works for you and dont judge others.

[Kananga]

What is a farang marriage? Are we attempting to label marital cultures from numerous counties and continents as being exactly the same because of the colour of their skin?

Aren't we all past that now...

[kerryk]

You got strange reasoning Kerry, she is not supporting me at all. If i were alone i had less cost then i do now. I don't need a girl to support me i can easily pay for it all. But this way i know its love and not greed. I understand you defending this to ease your conscience telling yourself your so hansum and she is not staying with you for the money.

Of course im thinking like a farang, i am a farang. Why would i give up my identity. If a Thai girl chooses a farang she did not choose a Thai. If she wants Thai style choose a Thai. (nice isn't it reversing your argument).

But there is no such thing as a generic answer, like i said b4 if a guy is a pensioner or if there are kids involved totally different rules aply. But if your both working both can contribute to the household its only fair. I would also support a gf / wife to set up a business that is nice and can make some money so she is independent. I think it scares a lot of guys independent woman so they like to say they pay it all and keep power.

I don't see why a wife who is a member of the household should be excluded from paying (if she has a job) Unless you don't see her as a member of your household but as a live in gf you rent.

Its in a way the same as giving an allowance because it saves her money in an indirect way.

I am surprised you have a nasty streak trying to belittle me personally instead of sticking to the issues. It is unbecoming in a gentleman. Don't worry I wont flame you in return.

I really don't have a dog in this hunt. My Thai GF has a place of her own and stays with me 6 out 7 nights a week because she wants to. I don't give her any money.

If we were to get married I would pay the household bills in our home. Traditional Thai men of means do this regardless of the economic status of the wife.

So what is the difference between my financial relationship and yours. My lady does not give me money for our joint household expenses.

In my own rather extensive investigation of Thai womanhood I have found that 98.6% of Thai women would rather a man gave them money than giving a man money.

Why does your lady give you money and mine does not give me money? I don't ask my Thai lady to give me money.

You said that you would move on if your wife did not help with the expenses. I assume you have an open and honest relationship with your wife and she knows this. I would assume she gives you money because she is afraid you would leave if she did not (that's what you told us and I assume you are an honest man).

Nothing wrong with motivation through fear. I would not do it but to each his own. You can trust fear; it is a more basic emotion than love and a lot more consistent. How many men would cheat if they were convinced, really convinced their wife would cut off their thing and feed it to the ducks. Thai students might actually study if they knew expulsion was the consequence of cheating.

You can go on about sharing expenses and that new wave equality stuff and Farang thinking but this is Thailand and the basic difference between you and I is your lady gives you money and mine does not give me money. There are any number of ways to explain that. It could be that your lady loves you more than mine loves me. Or it could be that I know something about Thai women that you don't know.

[robblok]

You got strange reasoning Kerry, she is not supporting me at all. If i were alone i had less cost then i do now. I don't need a girl to support me i can easily pay for it all. But this way i know its love and not greed. I understand you defending this to ease your conscience telling yourself your so hansum and she is not staying with you for the money.

Of course im thinking like a farang, i am a farang. Why would i give up my identity. If a Thai girl chooses a farang she did not choose a Thai. If she wants Thai style choose a Thai. (nice isn't it reversing your argument).

But there is no such thing as a generic answer, like i said b4 if a guy is a pensioner or if there are kids involved totally different rules aply. But if your both working both can contribute to the household its only fair. I would also support a gf / wife to set up a business that is nice and can make some money so she is independent. I think it scares a lot of guys independent woman so they like to say they pay it all and keep power.

I don't see why a wife who is a member of the household should be excluded from paying (if she has a job) Unless you don't see her as a member of your household but as a live in gf you rent.

Its in a way the same as giving an allowance because it saves her money in an indirect way.

I am surprised you have a nasty streak trying to belittle me personally instead of sticking to the issues. It is unbecoming in a gentleman. Don't worry I wont flame you in return.

I really don't have a dog in this hunt. My Thai GF has a place of her own and stays with me 6 out 7 nights a week because she wants to. I don't give her any money.

If we were to get married I would pay the household bills in our home. Traditional Thai men of means do this regardless of the economic status of the wife.

So what is the difference between my financial relationship and yours. My lady does not give me money for our joint household expenses.

In my own rather extensive investigation of Thai womanhood I have found that 98.6% of Thai women would rather a man gave them money than giving a man money.

Why does your lady give you money and mine does not give me money? I don't ask my Thai lady to give me money.

You said that you would move on if your wife did not help with the expenses. I assume you have an open and honest relationship with your wife and she knows this. I would assume she gives you money because she is afraid you would leave if she did not (that's what you told us and I assume you are an honest man).

Nothing wrong with motivation through fear. I would not do it but to each his own. You can trust fear; it is a more basic emotion than love and a lot more consistent. How many men would cheat if they were convinced, really convinced their wife would cut off their thing and feed it to the ducks. Thai students might actually study if they knew expulsion was the consequence of cheating.

You can go on about sharing expenses and that new wave equality stuff and Farang thinking but this is Thailand and the basic difference between you and I is your lady gives you money and mine does not give me money. There are any number of ways to explain that. It could be that your lady loves you more than mine loves me. Or it could be that I know something about Thai women that you don't know.

Your only playing the gentleman and hiding your attacks better as mine. You are totally missing the point.

Suppose you rent a house 5000 bt

Suppose electricity 3000 bt

Lady does the same

So if she moves in with you your giving her 8000 bt and maybe even more if your electric bill and food bill go up. So your paying for your lady. She is saving 8000 so your paying her this amount.

While i just share in cost before we both had 8000 cost now we both have 4000 cost (maybe more if the electric bill goes up. Seems much fairer what im doing. Here i assume we both make the same amount of money so a 50% 50% share.

I have an open honest relation she actually read these posts of you. But its not fear that makes her stay with me. (who was that again about personal attacks your making them too and hiding them in remarks, im Dutch we are blunt and attack in the open).

I would move on for sure if a girl would not share in the cost of a household. That means she is not committed and would only live on me. As i said before if i were a pensioner and not working then i would not find it strange if he paid her to stay home too. Same with kids.

You don't seem to grasp that a should is a unity where both contribute. You seem convinced you just have to pay it alone. For me in a household you share money, good times, bad times. If you dont even share money there is a good chance she will be gone the moment you cant pay for something anymore.

[Forethat]

Love how some of you have this notion that there is an exclusive "Thai" culture and exclusive "farang" culture of doing things.

There is. The fact that you struggle to recognize this is remarkable.

Where do you live, on the North Pole...?

[Kananga]

Love how some of you have this notion that there is an exclusive "Thai" culture and exclusive "farang" culture of doing things.

There is. The fact that you struggle to recognize this is remarkable.

Where do you live, on the North Pole...?

What exactly is farang culture? Would it be a blend of Scandinavian, American, British, Mediterranean, Australian, Canadian, South African and numerous other cultures? Never seen a single person demonstrate that before as a single culture.

[Forethat]

Love how some of you have this notion that there is an exclusive "Thai" culture and exclusive "farang" culture of doing things.

There is. The fact that you struggle to recognize this is remarkable.

Where do you live, on the North Pole...?

What exactly is farang culture? Would it be a blend of Scandinavian, American, British, Mediterranean, Australian, Canadian, South African and numerous other cultures? Never seen a single person demonstrate that before as a single culture.

When I used the word I used it as a common denominator for any culture other than Thai.

[rgs2001uk]

Love how some of you have this notion that there is an exclusive "Thai" culture and exclusive "farang" culture of doing things.

There is. The fact that you struggle to recognize this is remarkable.

Where do you live, on the North Pole...?

What exactly is farang culture? Would it be a blend of Scandinavian, American, British, Mediterranean, Australian, Canadian, South African and numerous other cultures? Never seen a single person demonstrate that before as a single culture.

When I used the word I used it as a common denominator for any culture other than Thai.

What is Thai culture?

Would it be, Thai-Chinese, Thai-Vietnamese, Thai-Indian, Thai-Malaysian, Tai, Mon, Khmer or Indian?

[Kananga]

Love how some of you have this notion that there is an exclusive "Thai" culture and exclusive "farang" culture of doing things.

There is. The fact that you struggle to recognize this is remarkable.

Where do you live, on the North Pole...?

What exactly is farang culture? Would it be a blend of Scandinavian, American, British, Mediterranean, Australian, Canadian, South African and numerous other cultures? Never seen a single person demonstrate that before as a single culture.

When I used the word I used it as a common denominator for any culture other than Thai.

So when you say its a fact there is an 'exclusive' farang culture, you mean there is an 'exclusive' common denominator of any culture other than Thai? What exactly would that 'exclusive' common denominator be then that makes this 'exclusive' farang culture you speak of?

[DP25]

She could live with you for free if you were old and ugly but since you are not you charge her. Right?

Yeah that's pretty much how it works

[Forethat]

So when you say its a fact there is an 'exclusive' farang culture, you mean there is an 'exclusive' common denominator of any culture other than Thai? What exactly would that 'exclusive' common denominator be then that makes this 'exclusive' farang culture you speak of?

You must have mistaken me for someone else. I have never used the word "farang-culture".

The word I used was "farang-land". Read again...?

[Kananga]

Love how some of you have this notion that there is an exclusive "Thai" culture and exclusive "farang" culture of doing things.

There is. The fact that you struggle to recognize this is remarkable.

Where do you live, on the North Pole...?

What exactly is farang culture? Would it be a blend of Scandinavian, American, British, Mediterranean, Australian, Canadian, South African and numerous other cultures? Never seen a single person demonstrate that before as a single culture.

When I used the word I used it as a common denominator for any culture other than Thai.

Misterwolf said he loves how some of you have this notion there is an 'exclusive' farang culture and you not only confirmed this, but noted that you thought it was remarkable that he doesnt share your same view on this 'exclusive' farang culture you stated is alive and well.

[StreetCowboy]

...

What exactly is farang culture? Would it be a blend of Scandinavian, American, British, Mediterranean, Australian, Canadian, South African and numerous other cultures? Never seen a single person demonstrate that before as a single culture.

When I used the word I used it as a common denominator for any culture other than Thai.

So when you say its a fact there is an 'exclusive' farang culture, you mean there is an 'exclusive' common denominator of any culture other than Thai? What exactly would that 'exclusive' common denominator be then that makes this 'exclusive' farang culture you speak of?

I think Farangland includes the Western European Roman Catholic and Protestant countries, and those that owe their cultural heritage to those countries - principally the immigrant-dominated countries of America, Africa and Australasia. I don't know if Eastern Europeans qualify. I think black chaps from America and Europe qualify, I think black folks who were born or grew up in Africa don't qualify, though that seems somewhat arbitrary.

SC

[Kananga]

...

What exactly is farang culture? Would it be a blend of Scandinavian, American, British, Mediterranean, Australian, Canadian, South African and numerous other cultures? Never seen a single person demonstrate that before as a single culture.

When I used the word I used it as a common denominator for any culture other than Thai.

So when you say its a fact there is an 'exclusive' farang culture, you mean there is an 'exclusive' common denominator of any culture other than Thai? What exactly would that 'exclusive' common denominator be then that makes this 'exclusive' farang culture you speak of?

I think Farangland includes the Western European Roman Catholic and Protestant countries, and those that owe their cultural heritage to those countries - principally the immigrant-dominated countries of America, Africa and Australasia. I don't know if Eastern Europeans qualify. I think black chaps from America and Europe qualify, I think black folks who were born or grew up in Africa don't qualify, though that seems somewhat arbitrary.

SC

Interesting. So Black men who are not from Africa are part of this decisive group, yet Black men who are from Africa are not, yet White men from Africa are? And what exactly do all these people have in common, other than they are not Thai?

[Forethat]

Misterwolf said he loves how some of you have this notion there is an 'exclusive' farang culture and you not only confirmed this, but noted that you thought it was remarkable that he doesnt share your same view on this 'exclusive' farang culture you stated is alive and well.

There IS a Thai culture and there IS a NON-Thai culture. Do you want to argue otherwise...?

I get the impression a couple of posters on here would want to argue that there is no such thing as a Thai culture. If this is correct the argument itself is pretty much <deleted>**ed up (or you live on the North Pole having never been exposed to anything close to a culture).

[Forethat]

And what exactly do all these people have in common, other than they are not Thai?

That they are likely to be pretty pissed off in case their future wife suggested that he must pay for her family, her parents and her two brothers sitting on their behinds back home in the village while she herself spends her days at home doing diddly shit other than planning the weekly trips to the shopping mall...?

[Kananga]

Misterwolf said he loves how some of you have this notion there is an 'exclusive' farang culture and you not only confirmed this, but noted that you thought it was remarkable that he doesnt share your same view on this 'exclusive' farang culture you stated is alive and well.

There IS a Thai culture and there IS a NON-Thai culture. Do you want to argue otherwise...?

I get the impression a couple of posters on here would want to argue that there is no such thing as a Thai culture. If this is correct the argument itself is pretty much <deleted>**ed up (or you live on the North Pole having never been exposed to anything close to a culture).

The term NON-Thai culture is completely different to you earlier agreeing that there is an 'exclusive' farang culture. Apart form the word culture you have completely changed all the words!!! I want to know what you meant when you agreed that there is an 'exclusive' farang culture. We are all aware there is non thai culture and we're not interested in that. We want to know about this 'exclusive' farang culture you agreed is alive and well.

Thank you

[Ijustwannateach]

Isn't Thailand a 'community property' state as far as marriage property and divorce rulings are concerned? I believe that means that the husband and wife are jointly in ownership of all property acquired or wealth generated DURING the marriage (not what they brought in) and also legally equally responsible for all debt incurred?

If that is correct, I think it would focus minds on the financial meaning of the marriage to suggest (or think about) at the time of proposed marriage a split of both incomes in half and share them one for each, husband and wife. If one party suddenly realises that there is a great disparity, it might give him (or her) the perspective on the reality of the time in marriage and what will be at stake if something goes wrong.

I realise that this model doesn't account for the burden of the partner who works as a homemaker, with no 'official' wage- but that kind of family member is worth every penny, too, and such a financial arrangement would acknowledge this fact openly.

[Forethat]

Misterwolf said he loves how some of you have this notion there is an 'exclusive' farang culture and you not only confirmed this, but noted that you thought it was remarkable that he doesnt share your same view on this 'exclusive' farang culture you stated is alive and well.

There IS a Thai culture and there IS a NON-Thai culture. Do you want to argue otherwise...?

I get the impression a couple of posters on here would want to argue that there is no such thing as a Thai culture. If this is correct the argument itself is pretty much <deleted>**ed up (or you live on the North Pole having never been exposed to anything close to a culture).

The term NON-Thai culture is completely different to you earlier agreeing that there is an 'exclusive' farang culture. Apart form the word culture you have completely changed all the words!!! I want to know what you meant when you agreed that there is an 'exclusive' farang culture. We are all aware there is non thai culture and we're not interested in that. We want to know about this 'exclusive' farang culture you agreed is alive and well.

Thank you

I think you're giving the word too much of a meaning. As I have already said I used it as a common denominator for any culture other than Thai.

If you want to hear something else I simply cant help you. Maybe it's a difference in culture?

[veryruay]

Why must go Dutch with our wife? Foreigners practice this but not in Asia, you mean you will 50-50 with our own wife? Miser?

[Misterwolf]

Misterwolf said he loves how some of you have this notion there is an 'exclusive' farang culture and you not only confirmed this, but noted that you thought it was remarkable that he doesnt share your same view on this 'exclusive' farang culture you stated is alive and well.

There IS a Thai culture and there IS a NON-Thai culture. Do you want to argue otherwise...?

I get the impression a couple of posters on here would want to argue that there is no such thing as a Thai culture. If this is correct the argument itself is pretty much <deleted>**ed up (or you live on the North Pole having never been exposed to anything close to a culture).

So you trying to tell me that there is an atypical Thai culture and atypical non Thai culture?

I would suggest there would be a wide range of relationships throughout "both cultures" generally based on socio economic levels.

For example you going to tell me the couple living in the outer western suburbs of Sydney will have the same "culture" as the couple from a wealthy eastern suburbs suburb?

Likewise you going to tell me the Issan farmer couple will have the same attitude as the professional Thai couple from Bangkok and all these labels are somehow mutually exclusive?

IMHO it may be you that resides closer to the North Pole with your blinkered view of the world.

[Forethat]

Misterwolf said he loves how some of you have this notion there is an 'exclusive' farang culture and you not only confirmed this, but noted that you thought it was remarkable that he doesnt share your same view on this 'exclusive' farang culture you stated is alive and well.

There IS a Thai culture and there IS a NON-Thai culture. Do you want to argue otherwise...?

I get the impression a couple of posters on here would want to argue that there is no such thing as a Thai culture. If this is correct the argument itself is pretty much <deleted>**ed up (or you live on the North Pole having never been exposed to anything close to a culture).

So you trying to tell me that there is an atypical Thai culture and atypical non Thai culture?

I would suggest there would be a wide range of relationships throughout "both cultures" generally based on socio economic levels.

For example you going to tell me the couple living in the outer western suburbs of Sydney will have the same "culture" as the couple from a wealthy eastern suburbs suburb?

Likewise you going to tell me the Issan farmer couple will have the same attitude as the professional Thai couple from Bangkok and all these labels are somehow mutually exclusive?

No, I'd say no to all of those questions if you ask me, and I'm not going to tell you any of the above you cooked up.

Edited September 27, 2011 by Forethat