Effeminate Thai Guys...

[ChrisP]

Ok, my bf is definitely the Fem type. No problem in LOS...

But last week, in my conversation with his Mum (who is an English teacher) she kept referring to my bf as "she"... like it was absolutely normal.

I will say that my bf is not a transexual or LadyBoy/Kathoey, and has had no operations... but is definitely pretty and fem. He even sometimes uses the feminine Thai grammar in conversation.

I don't have a problem with it at all, and I know Thai sexuality is somewhat fluid.. but I was just trying to imagine a Western mother of my ex-bf's referring to her male son as "she"....

Nope.

ChrisP

[PeaceBlondie]

As our best student lay dying, the Ed.D. teacher in the staffroom was trying to be as sympathethic and politically correct as she could about him. Yet she accidentally referred to him as 'she' and he wasn't outrageously katoey, never wore female clothes, seldom raised his voice, etc. It's not that unusual, even for Thai mothers, to think of her gay son as 'she.' Maybe Thai pronouns are different. When I teach English pronouns to matayom (teenagers) I say that in English if not in Thai, a student who wears short pants and short hair is he/him/his, while a student who wears skirt and long hair is she/her/hers. That even covers the lesbians in the closet. But when the boys want to go to the lady's toilet, I let them. I don't always correct students when they innocently use the wrong gender English pronoun when talking about a katoey.

We were playing "Who is It?" in a matayom 1 class. Nut (the girl) wanted the class to identify Beem, a notorious ladyboy. She gave the wrong clue in English that she was thinking of a girl! I had to correct her, and we all had a good laugh, and Beem wasn't offended.

[fits and starts]

My ex bf is what I would consider soft and not overtly sissy. He is never invited to family gatherings because of this. They are ashamed of him in public but will talk about his achievements to anyone who will listen like the fact he has a good job in an Embassy. The Thai two- faced scenario. This is not uncommon and although many of the lower class boys can be accepted as sissy by their parents it is definitely frowned upon in higher societies hence so many in the closet. The poorer the family the less they care so long as they can send some money home.

[bkk1970]

I guess Asian culture accepts more easily fem-typed gays due to its belief in karma.In their eyes,a fem guy is just a girl because "she" knocked at the wrong door when trying to get into her mum's belly during her pregnancy according to the belief.This is a budhist thing,so I don't think that your BF's mum was trying to put her son down or making fun of him when using the "She".

[Eman]

Ok, my bf is definitely the Fem type.  No problem in LOS...

But last week, in my conversation with his Mum (who is an English teacher) she kept referring to my bf as "she"... like it was absolutely normal. 

I will say that my bf is not a transexual or LadyBoy/Kathoey, and has had no operations...  but is definitely pretty and fem. He even sometimes uses the feminine Thai grammar in conversation.

I don't have a problem with it at all, and I know Thai sexuality is somewhat fluid.. but I was just trying to imagine a Western mother of my ex-bf's referring to her male son as "she"....

Nope. 

ChrisP

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

My assumption is that someone who is overtly a Ladyboy probably considers herself a woman (born in the wrong body)....

And as such, I always think of them and refer to them as women.