ludditeman Posted January 16, 2012 Share Posted January 16, 2012 As for the rest of you who have alternated between criticism of my wife's age, appearance, their assessment of my family's joy at our celebration, and cynical assumptions regarding money and the cultural tradition of sinsot; I think you're probably revealing more about yourselves than you imagine - certainly you're far less qualified to judge my own situation than I am. To be completely serious. Considering the amount of money you spent on her 'big day', she didn't look all that happy. Personally, I would have been disappointed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aussiebebe Posted January 16, 2012 Share Posted January 16, 2012 It looked like a lovely wedding, good luck to the couple - what does the title of this thread actually mean? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pwm Posted January 16, 2012 Share Posted January 16, 2012 If you think that giving large sums of money to the wife's family will "prove your ties" to the Thai authorities - you're living in cloud cuckoo land.... I don't blame you though for deciding its better not to sully yourself by 'putting the record straight' . I think you need to adjust your spectacles - there are two subjects being discussed: the accuracy of the article, and the question of whether sinsot was returned to the groom. I've explained why I won't be answering the latter, and correcting the various factual errors in the article would not sully me in any way, but similarly confers no benefit. I am presently content with the amount of information about my private life which has become public, and have no desire to refine it to the point where it may become useful to someone with malicious intent. Contrary to your own view, participating in civil and social customs and activities is appreciated in most cultures, and Thailand is no different in that respect. People who have some appreciation for the way in which "networking" (to use the Western expression) operates in Thailand can easily grasp that a wedding is an ideal venue for enriching ones' circle of contacts. Without trying to big-note myself, I'm more than satisfied with the outcome of my function in that respect. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pwm Posted January 16, 2012 Share Posted January 16, 2012 To be completely serious. Considering the amount of money you spent on her 'big day', she didn't look all that happy. Personally, I would have been disappointed. In prior comments, you've stated that you think my wife is unattractive, compared her to an elephant, somehow decided I'm American, and expressed with confidence that Thai women are comfortable with public displays of affection. Given that you have no idea how much money was spent on our "big day", and that this would have no bearing on the happiness of anyone with some substance, I'm quite comfortable dismissing your opinion of her degree of happiness based upon a 3.5 minute video of a day-long event. I think that people who believe that money should buy happiness are often disappointed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ludditeman Posted January 16, 2012 Share Posted January 16, 2012 (edited) To be completely serious. Considering the amount of money you spent on her 'big day', she didn't look all that happy. Personally, I would have been disappointed. In prior comments, you've stated that you think my wife is unattractive, compared her to an elephant, somehow decided I'm American, and expressed with confidence that Thai women are comfortable with public displays of affection. Given that you have no idea how much money was spent on our "big day", and that this would have no bearing on the happiness of anyone with some substance, I'm quite comfortable dismissing your opinion of her degree of happiness based upon a 3.5 minute video of a day-long event. I think that people who believe that money should buy happiness are often disappointed. 1) If we all thought the same woman was attractive, 1 would be busy, the others would be lonely. 2) Compared her favourably to an elephant, so a back-handed compliment. 3) Microsoft employee = American, sorry for the stereotyping, but an understandable mistake. 4) Most Thai women under the age of 45 have 'moved forward', and are faily happy with PDAs. 5) It's nice that at least one of you was happy on that day. (learn Thai and you will understand more about the culture both past and present, and increase your chances of a successful marriage) Edited January 16, 2012 by ludditeman Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pwm Posted January 16, 2012 Share Posted January 16, 2012 1) If we all thought the same woman was attractive, 1 would be busy, the others would be lonely. 2) Compared her favourably to an elephant, so a back-handed compliment. No further comments on the insufficient expression of matrimonial bliss (in your opinion)? In any case, I accept your contorted apology for insulting my wife. 4) Most Thai women under the age of 45 have 'moved forward', and are faily happy with PDAs. I disagree with you regarding Thai women and PDAs. As in any society, there are forces at work in Thailand that evolve and weaken traditional taboos, however there are many who retain their respect for their family and cultural ties and traditions, and do not simply become different people because they are exposed to alternatives. I, for one, cherish the modesty and demureness of the Thai women I know, all of whom are uncomfortable with anything more than holding hands in public (and for all the Thai couples I know, even that is too much). (learn Thai and you will understand more about the culture both past and present, and increase your chances of a successful marriage) Given you didn't notice that it plainly says I'm Australian in the linked article, I think you should probably take your own advice on learning Thai before you make incorrect assumptions about my language skills. It's actually quite interesting that your previous comments on this thread include those of your own wife/partner, apparently expressing a positive view of my function, while yours are almost exclusively critical or negative. Perhaps you're not the right person to be providing marriage guidance? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ludditeman Posted January 16, 2012 Share Posted January 16, 2012 (edited) I disagree with you regarding Thai women and PDAs. As in any society, there are forces at work in Thailand that evolve and weaken traditional taboos, however there are many who retain their respect for their family and cultural ties and traditions, and do not simply become different people because they are exposed to alternatives. I, for one, cherish the modesty and demureness of the Thai women I know, all of whom are uncomfortable with anything more than holding hands in public (and for all the Thai couples I know, even that is too much). I know many Thais both at small rural village level and big city types. Women over 50 (and single women over 40) mostly seem to be the disapproving of PDA types, but then understandable as they were all sold to their husbands, for money or the social advancement of their families. The younger women I know who make no PDAs pretty much don't like their husbands, but have settled for the family arrangements with no love lost on either side. As to which one of us doesn't understand the culture, I hope it is me and that I am wrong on all levels of my understanding. You being Australian, good luck with your future, coming from a country that appears to penalise men upon divorce, more than any other country I know of, you will need it. As Chris Rock says, pre-nups are for the middle classes, if you are rich, losing half of a $20M income doesn't affect your lifestyle that much, if you are middle-class, losing half of a $50k income will really hurt. Edited January 16, 2012 by ludditeman Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trevorg Posted January 16, 2012 Share Posted January 16, 2012 (edited) pwm - Well done for posting and congratulations on your marriage, as you say you probably spent $1000's less on the wedding than you would/ could have done in the west and sinsot or any other similar practice is up to the individuals/couples/ families involved and nobody else's business! (Didn't it used to be traditional for the bride's father to pay for the wedding in the West?). Too many cynics on certain parts of this forum! Good luck for the future! Edited January 16, 2012 by trevorg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
norrona Posted January 16, 2012 Share Posted January 16, 2012 I think that people who believe that money should buy happiness are often disappointed. so are your in-laws dissapointed with their lot then? on a more pleasent and serious note, best of luck for your future Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lovelaos Posted January 16, 2012 Share Posted January 16, 2012 This thread has just got interesting. Let's see how many 'haters' will be back now the man in question is here to defend himself. I guess most of the 'haters' are penniless, jealous, insecure types we all see being dragged around Tescos with that distant blank expression. Good luck with your new life pwm. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ludditeman Posted January 16, 2012 Share Posted January 16, 2012 (edited) This thread has just got interesting. Let's see how many 'haters' will be back now the man in question is here to defend himself. I think you mean the person 'claiming' to be the groom! Edited January 16, 2012 by ludditeman Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zzaa09 Posted January 16, 2012 Share Posted January 16, 2012 This thread has just got interesting. Let's see how many 'haters' will be back now the man in question is here to defend himself. I think you mean the person 'claiming' to be the groom! Yep. We don't know who is who. But then, if it is the gentlemen in question, have to extend some kudos for having some <deleted> to coming around and participating within this [expected] harsh and cynical inter-exchange. As we all know, the world of private and public has become a thin edge. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StreetCowboy Posted January 16, 2012 Share Posted January 16, 2012 This thread has just got interesting. Let's see how many 'haters' will be back now the man in question is here to defend himself. I think you mean the person 'claiming' to be the groom! "I'm Brian, and so's my wife!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
janverbeem Posted January 16, 2012 Share Posted January 16, 2012 (edited) This thread has just got interesting. Let's see how many 'haters' will be back now the man in question is here to defend himself. I guess most of the 'haters' are penniless, jealous, insecure types we all see being dragged around Tescos with that distant blank expression. Good luck with your new life pwm. Uhmm,seems that the computer business is aging their employees quickly as the groom was 5 years younger only a year ago. http://www.thaivisa....ost__p__3334952 Also din't know that microsoft was a Canadian company. http://www.thaivisa....ost__p__2625139 PWM,which bridge was that you were living under? Edited January 16, 2012 by janverbeem Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pwm Posted January 17, 2012 Share Posted January 17, 2012 Uhmm,seems that the computer business is aging their employees quickly as the groom was 5 years younger only a year ago. http://www.thaivisa....ost__p__3334952 Also din't know that microsoft was a Canadian company. http://www.thaivisa....ost__p__2625139 PWM,which bridge was that you were living under? If you'd been paying attention, you'd have noticed that I've already commented on the many factual errors in the published articles, specifically mentioning the ages of myself and my wife! Similarly, if you'd bothered to read the thread, you'd have noticed that others have also confirmed there's no significant Microsoft presence in Phuket, which should have led you to the conclusion that perhaps that part of the reporting was also inaccurate. I'm surprised it's taken so long for someone such as yourself to discover that I do not in fact work for Microsoft at all, as the evidence was readily available, but it's also quite likely that others detected the fact and didn't automatically develop their own conspiracy theories. I have no idea if you're being deliberately dense, or just didn't bother to read before writing, but your assumption that I'd respond to a thread such as this if it wasn't my own wedding being described is deranged. In the interests of shutting up those who doubt that I am the person described in the press, I've attached a photo of a proof of my wedding invitation. I'm sure those of you desperate enough can dream up a way in which I might have faked or obtained such a thing, but I'm fairly confident such irrational theories don't pass Occham's razor, and I won't be responding to them. I won't be holding my breath waiting for the contrition. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ludditeman Posted January 17, 2012 Share Posted January 17, 2012 (edited) I have no idea if you're being deliberately dense, or just didn't bother to read before writing, but your assumption that I'd respond to a thread such as this if it wasn't my own wedding being described is deranged. In the interests of shutting up those who doubt that I am the person described in the press, I've attached a photo of a proof of my wedding invitation. I'm sure those of you desperate enough can dream up a way in which I might have faked or obtained such a thing, but I'm fairly confident such irrational theories don't pass Occham's razor, and I won't be responding to them. I won't be holding my breath waiting for the contrition. 1) Many foreigners in Thailand are actually deranged (some like to put on a dog and pony show for the locals). 2) She looks much prettier in that photo, your hair needs to be changed though! Edited January 17, 2012 by ludditeman Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pwm Posted January 17, 2012 Share Posted January 17, 2012 But then, if it is the gentlemen in question, have to extend some kudos for having some <deleted> to coming around and participating within this [expected] harsh and cynical inter-exchange. It does not take <deleted> to post on a web forum to anonymous armchair heroes, just patience. Similarly, it takes no courage and little to no aptitude whatsoever to post cynical fantasies or outlandish conspiracy theories in the first place. Why does the happy event of a wedding bring out such fear & loathing on this web forum? [don't answer that] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pwm Posted January 17, 2012 Share Posted January 17, 2012 1) Many foreigners in Thailand are actually deranged (some like to put on a dog and pony show for the locals). You think celebrating a wedding is a "dog and pony show for the locals"? I suspect you're nearly alone with that idea (although maybe not in the weird world of TV), and from the sound of it, your wife/partner doesn't agree with you either. 2) She looks much prettier in that photo, your hair needs to be changed though! Is it fair to interpret this comment as "I apologise for doubting that you are the groom referred to in this thread"? Otherwise, I'm not interested in your opinions of my wife's (or my) appearance. You've expressed enough opinions on this thread alone to ensure they're given sufficient weighting in my mind. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ludditeman Posted January 17, 2012 Share Posted January 17, 2012 1) Many foreigners in Thailand are actually deranged (some like to put on a dog and pony show for the locals). You think celebrating a wedding is a "dog and pony show for the locals"? ......... It depends on the number of elephants! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
samran Posted January 17, 2012 Share Posted January 17, 2012 But then, if it is the gentlemen in question, have to extend some kudos for having some <deleted> to coming around and participating within this [expected] harsh and cynical inter-exchange. It does not take <deleted> to post on a web forum to anonymous armchair heroes, just patience. Similarly, it takes no courage and little to no aptitude whatsoever to post cynical fantasies or outlandish conspiracy theories in the first place. Why does the happy event of a wedding bring out such fear & loathing on this web forum? [don't answer that] Welcome to Thai Visa then! I know that I can be a cynic, but I'm happy that I kept my cynicism confined to the news article on this one. Though I stand by my statment of potentially looking miserable doing a jig down the street in 35 degree heat....I hate dancing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BookMan Posted January 17, 2012 Share Posted January 17, 2012 To be completely serious. Considering the amount of money you spent on her 'big day', she didn't look all that happy. Personally, I would have been disappointed. In prior comments, you've stated that you think my wife is unattractive, compared her to an elephant, somehow decided I'm American, and expressed with confidence that Thai women are comfortable with public displays of affection. Given that you have no idea how much money was spent on our "big day", and that this would have no bearing on the happiness of anyone with some substance, I'm quite comfortable dismissing your opinion of her degree of happiness based upon a 3.5 minute video of a day-long event. I think that people who believe that money should buy happiness are often disappointed. 1) If we all thought the same woman was attractive, 1 would be busy, the others would be lonely. 2) Compared her favourably to an elephant, so a back-handed compliment. 3) Microsoft employee = American, sorry for the stereotyping, but an understandable mistake. 4) Most Thai women under the age of 45 have 'moved forward', and are faily happy with PDAs. 5) It's nice that at least one of you was happy on that day. (learn Thai and you will understand more about the culture both past and present, and increase your chances of a successful marriage) Just saying "Sorry, I was out of line" is sometimes simpler. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pwm Posted January 17, 2012 Share Posted January 17, 2012 I know that I can be a cynic, but I'm happy that I kept my cynicism confined to the news article on this one. Though I stand by my statment of potentially looking miserable doing a jig down the street in 35 degree heat....I hate dancing. And your comments were entirely accurate, which is why I didn't bother responding. It was quite hot (although the foreigners were largely Aussies and can handle it), and given the precise time of arrival at the house, and large number of people (not to mention two elephants) in the kan mak procession, they had to stop several times and sweat it out, while attempting to appear happy about it! Encouraging them to dance was about as much as I was able to do - forcing them to put on a smile at the same time might have provoked a rebellion. In any case, after an hour dancing in the sun, they all felt much better when they were able to negotiate an exchange of refreshing beverages for their banana/sugar cane and a shady spot once at the house. Fortunately, the hot dancing part was all over and done with fairly early, with the rest of the celebration and party going on under shade or indoors. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
samran Posted January 17, 2012 Share Posted January 17, 2012 (edited) I know that I can be a cynic, but I'm happy that I kept my cynicism confined to the news article on this one. Though I stand by my statment of potentially looking miserable doing a jig down the street in 35 degree heat....I hate dancing. And your comments were entirely accurate, which is why I didn't bother responding. It was quite hot (although the foreigners were largely Aussies and can handle it), and given the precise time of arrival at the house, and large number of people (not to mention two elephants) in the kan mak procession, they had to stop several times and sweat it out, while attempting to appear happy about it! Encouraging them to dance was about as much as I was able to do - forcing them to put on a smile at the same time might have provoked a rebellion. In any case, after an hour dancing in the sun, they all felt much better when they were able to negotiate an exchange of refreshing beverages for their banana/sugar cane and a shady spot once at the house. Fortunately, the hot dancing part was all over and done with fairly early, with the rest of the celebration and party going on under shade or indoors. When my parents got married in Australia in the early 70's, cause a Thai-Aust marriage was such a novelty the local rag covered it, including the line of my mother calling her parents back in 'Bangalore' instead of 'Bangkok'. So much for accuracy in journalism. If you had known the article was going to turn out that way, you should have given yourself titles and better JD's. All the best. Edited January 17, 2012 by samran Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Briggsy Posted January 17, 2012 Share Posted January 17, 2012 Best of luck to "pwm". Judging by his posts, luck has little to do with it. He clearly knows what he is doing and where he is going. I'm sure the cynics and haters on here are like water off a duck's back to him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
buggerlugs Posted January 17, 2012 Share Posted January 17, 2012 What a cynical lot we all are.Some of us have spent too long here methinks. Can't argue with the truth however. When I asked my "missus" if she wanted to get married and have a big party in the village etc she said 'No,, Better I wait and not get stuck with you" Can't fault her logic. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zzaa09 Posted January 17, 2012 Share Posted January 17, 2012 What a cynical lot we all are.Some of us have spent too long here methinks. Can't argue with the truth however. When I asked my "missus" if she wanted to get married and have a big party in the village etc she said 'No,, Better I wait and not get stuck with you" Can't fault her logic. Your better half sounds as if she is well-founded and square up! Good for her and good for you, mate! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sing_Sling Posted January 19, 2012 Share Posted January 19, 2012 Why does Ludditeman seem so angry with the whole thing and why does he become aggressive when confronted with the man in question? pwm seems too balanced to fall into the category of Caucasian loser marries bargirl and is unhappy. Congratulations, pwm. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ludditeman Posted January 19, 2012 Share Posted January 19, 2012 (edited) Why does Ludditeman seem so angry with the whole thing and why does he become aggressive when confronted with the man in question? pwm seems too balanced to fall into the category of Caucasian loser marries bargirl and is unhappy. Congratulations, pwm. 1) I'm not sure which most I made that seemed 'angry'? (or even unreasonable in any way) Can you help me out here? (I've found the whole circus amusing yet sad) 2) The relationship failure usually comes later, after the buffalo runs short of readies, will this be the same story, only time will tell. Edited January 19, 2012 by ludditeman 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zzaa09 Posted January 19, 2012 Share Posted January 19, 2012 Why does Ludditeman seem so angry with the whole thing and why does he become aggressive when confronted with the man in question? pwm seems too balanced to fall into the category of Caucasian loser marries bargirl and is unhappy. Congratulations, pwm. 1) I'm not sure which most I made that seemed 'angry'? (or even unreasonable in any way) Can you help me out here? (I've found the whole circus amusing yet sad) 2) The relationship failure usually comes later, after the buffalo runs short of readies, will this be the same story, only time will tell. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ludditeman Posted January 19, 2012 Share Posted January 19, 2012 Be sure to pop over to this thread http://www.thaivisa.com/forum/topic/270175-mee-and-my-dad/ and see how their dream wedding ended, they have a video too! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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