We should all pause to remember that it was 100 years

ago today that the Titanic sank after hitting an iceberg.

One of the most enduring questions asked about the

tragedy was as to the exact number of Thais onboard

the stricken vessel.

After years of painstaking research the answer can now

be revealed - absolutely none.

It may at least provide the opportunity to dispel some

urban myths linking Thailand to the tragedy.

It can now be confirmed that a Thai crewman was not at

the wheel the moment the vessel struck the iceberg

and fled the scene soon after.

Rumours also persist that it was a Thai band which as

the vessel began to slowly sink continued to play, with

a three hour version of Hotel California, forcing many

passengers to jump overboard.

Any more?

Reo Dee Kaa Preo is actually a particularly white hi-so thai chinese actor who westernized his nme and dyed his hair.

Rumour has it that in the boiler room there was a noodle station, 3 lottery sellers and a Chang bottling plant, next time I see Captain Shinawtra I will ask him for his memours.

You mean that the accident wasn't caused by the Thai crew looking for ice to put in their beer?

You mean that the accident wasn't caused by the Thai crew looking for ice to put in their beer?

You may say that I could not possibly comment on that, but apparently there were a lot of plastic bags and polystyrene trays floating at the scene!

Rumor is that in the original draft of Lord Jim the guys that abandoned the bridge were Thais, Jim being the dumb farang who took the heat.

None

So the story of all those TG's going down on the Titanic is not true?

None

So the story of all those TG's going down on the Titanic is not true?

The old Titanic disc oat the top of soi bagla years back?

No, I'm pretty sure that's true.

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So the story of all those TG's going down on the Titanic is not true?

The old Titanic disc oat the top of soi bagla years back?

No, I'm pretty sure that's true.

Phew, thanks for clearing that up. I was thinking I dreamn't it all.

You're all getting the story mixed up with the wooden ship Thai-panic that went down in the Andaman sea off the coast of Phuket some 20 years ago with a full cargo of condoms.

Apparently the captain was distracted when there was no fish sauce available for his noodles.

So he left the ship unattended while he went ashore in search of a 7-Eleven store.

In the meantime all crewmembers were busy playing cards and became drunk on laukau, thus allowing the ship to run aground. The captain was forced to pay heavy compensation to the owners of the ship

who re-invested the money in a fleet of jetskis.

All crew and passengers were saved thanks to some handy balloons that acted as flotation devices.

You're all getting the story mixed up with the wooden ship Thai-panic that went down in the Andaman sea off the coast of Phuket some 20 years ago with a full cargo of condoms.

Apparently the captain was distracted when there was no fish sauce available for his noodles.

So he left the ship unattended while he went ashore in search of a 7-Eleven store.

In the meantime all crewmembers were busy playing cards and became drunk on laukau, thus allowing the ship to run aground. The captain was forced to pay heavy compensation to the owners of the ship

who re-invested the money in a fleet of jetskis.

All crew and passengers were saved thanks to some handy balloons that acted as flotation devices.

Well I never! If only they had had jet skis on the Titanic.

What is about "Hotel California" and Thais? Did they want for the National Anthem?

What is about "Hotel California" and Thais? Did they want for the National Anthem?

Imported by American servicemen while enjoying R&R in Pattaya ?

What is about "Hotel California" and Thais? Did they want for the National Anthem?

I keep being asked to sing that, and l can't. They think l am a strange farang cos everybody can (badly).

Surely you mean the Thaitanic.

It's Kate Winslet fault IMO..The Captain was in love with her..And when he saw her in love with the bum ( Leo ) , he drank too much Chang and hit the iceberg..

You can rewrite history if you like, but facts are facts.

Yes there is more, the titanic was built using cheap imported Thai engineers, at the time the Chinese boxer rebellion was in full swing which excluded them, this is the reason why 1 it ripped open so easily on impact and 2 there was a lack of life boats on board, of course this has been hushed up here as the construction industry does not want to loose prospective western clients for there condo developments.

Titanic captain - "My God, we've hit an iceburg, how far are we from the nearest land?"

Thai radar operator - "About 2 miles captain"

Captain - "With God's grace, we may be able to make it. Which direction?"

Thai radar operator - "Straight down Sir."

It occcurs to me that that the iceberg may have hit the Titanic rather than the other way round in a bid to stop illegal immigrants arriving in the USA, in fact these could have been the first Boat People, smell the noodles!

Titanic captain - "My God, we've hit an iceburg, how far are we from the nearest land?"

Thai radar operator - "About 2 miles captain"

Captain - "With God's grace, we may be able to make it. Which direction?"

Thai radar operator - "Straight down Sir."

That can't be right..........the Thai told the truth about direction.

Titanic captain - "My God, we've hit an iceburg, how far are we from the nearest land?"

Thai radar operator - "About 2 miles captain"

Captain - "With God's grace, we may be able to make it. Which direction?"

Thai radar operator - "Straight down Sir."

The mystery has been solved!

Thais were using RADAR (gaydar?) at leat 25 years before it was invented. No wonder they didn,t see the 'berg. Was RADAR sold to them by the same people that sold them those 'Bomb Detectors' and music licences etc

Titanic captain - "My God, we've hit an iceburg, how far are we from the nearest land?"

Thai radar operator - "About 2 miles captain"

Captain - "With God's grace, we may be able to make it. Which direction?"

Thai radar operator - "Straight down Sir."

The mystery has been solved!

Thais were using RADAR (gaydar?) at leat 25 years before it was invented. No wonder they didn,t see the 'berg. Was RADAR sold to them by the same people that sold them those 'Bomb Detectors' and music licences etc

Please don't muddy the waters with actual facts. Thais believe that they invented everything that they use.

Titanic captain - "My God, we've hit an iceburg, how far are we from the nearest land?"

Thai radar operator - "About 2 miles captain"

Captain - "With God's grace, we may be able to make it. Which direction?"

Thai radar operator - "Straight down Sir."

The mystery has been solved!

Thais were using RADAR (gaydar?) at leat 25 years before it was invented. No wonder they didn,t see the 'berg. Was RADAR sold to them by the same people that sold them those 'Bomb Detectors' and music licences etc

Please don't muddy the waters with actual facts. Thais believe that they invented everything that they use.

Hmmm, yes, l have the problem explaining to the kids, the lad is distraught that even our airport was a farang build, and lets not talk about the ''Thai'' Boeing 737 that lands there eh.

Titanic captain - "My God, we've hit an iceburg, how far are we from the nearest land?"

Thai radar operator - "About 2 miles captain"

Captain - "With God's grace, we may be able to make it. Which direction?"

Thai radar operator - "Straight down Sir."

The mystery has been solved!

Thais were using RADAR (gaydar?) at leat 25 years before it was invented. No wonder they didn,t see the 'berg. Was RADAR sold to them by the same people that sold them those 'Bomb Detectors' and music licences etc

Please don't muddy the waters with actual facts. Thais believe that they invented everything that they use.

Hmmm, yes, l have the problem explaining to the kids, the lad is distraught that even our airport was a farang build, and lets not talk about the ''Thai'' Boeing 737 that lands there eh.

Or Kanchburi Fried Chicken or those cars from the Bangkok Motor Works!

This could all have been the prelude to a super Songkran with the first ice in the water( aka Pattaya style ) being propelled, it all went wrong about 1/2 way through the Hotel Calfornica when some one lost the plug! The correct answer is 300 or maybe 3000, not all had work visas or tickets.

Although it was never confirmed it has been suggested that the real reason for striking the iceberg was that approx 5 tonnes of noodles had snagged the rudder, whilst the iceberg was surrounding a tanker old Chang. There is clearly more this than meets the eye

What is about "Hotel California" and Thais? Did they want for the National Anthem?

I was in a bar in Patts and they played it 3 times already.I told mama-san and dj,once more and i'm outta here.Well you guessed it,on it come again,i'm outta there.I was the only customer,and they actually wanted to know why i was leaving,as if they had the only bar for miles.

What is about "Hotel California" and Thais? Did they want for the National Anthem?

I was in a bar in Patts and they played it 3 times already.I told mama-san and dj,once more and i'm outta here.Well you guessed it,on it come again,i'm outta there.I was the only customer,and they actually wanted to know why i was leaving,as if they had the only bar for miles.

They were wondering why you left, becuase every bar for miles was probably also playing Hoten California.

What is about "Hotel California" and Thais? Did they want for the National Anthem?

I was in a bar in Patts and they played it 3 times already.I told mama-san and dj,once more and i'm outta here.Well you guessed it,on it come again,i'm outta there.I was the only customer,and they actually wanted to know why i was leaving,as if they had the only bar for miles.

They were wondering why you left, becuase every bar for miles was probably also playing Hoten California.

Welcome to the ................... couldn't check out quick enough, the song has flogged to death. H.C R.I.P.