Secret Life Of Teaspoons

[khall64au]

A spoonful of science..

LONDON (Reuters) - Australian scientists have proved what is common knowledge to most people -- that teaspoons appear to have minds of their own.

In a study at their own facility, a group of scientists from the Macfarlane Burnet Institute for Medical Research and Public Health in Melbourne secretly numbered 70 teaspoons and tracked their movements over five months.

Supporting their expectations, 80 percent of the spoons vanished during the period -- although those in private areas of the institute lasted nearly twice as long as those in communal sections.

"At this rate, an estimated 250 teaspoons would need to be purchased annually to maintain a workable population of 70 teaspoons," they wrote in Friday's festive edition of the British Medical Journal.

They said their research proved that teaspoons were an essential part of office life and the rapid rate of disappearance proved that this was under relentless assault.

Regretting that scientific literature was "strangely bereft" of teaspoon-related research, the scientists offered a few theories to explain the phenomenon.

Taking a tip from Douglas Adams' Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy books, they suggested that the teaspoons were quietly migrating to a planet uniquely populated by "spoonoid" life forms living in a spoonish state of Nirvana.

They also offered the phenomenon of "resistentialism" in which inanimate objects like teaspoons have a natural aversion to humans.

On the other hand, they suggested, people might simply be taking them.

[Firefan]

Interesting research - maybe they can add a study on my left foot socks... I am having the theory that me washing machine eats them in order to grow and take over the work Terminator style but have no scientific proof...yet....

Cheers!

[Boo]

that may explain why I have about 50 butter knives but only 4 forks left (I bought the set together so there should be 50 of each!)

[ThaiPauly]

Whenever we buy clothes we ALWAYS take the hangers!

We are always short of hangers,

But not as short as left socks, thank the lord I dont wear them anymore and have left the mystery of the "Lost left sock" behind me

So where do the hangers go, same place as the socks teaspoons and 1,000 Baht notes.?

Oh I forgot to mention that whenever I leave my wallet around the house when my missus is at home, they incredibly seem to disappear for a reason I cannot fathom either

Happy Christmas

TP

Edited December 24, 2005 by ThaiPauly

[Gazza]

It's not just left socks that go missing. I was always losing mine so I bought only pairs of right socks and wore one of them on my left foot. They still went missing though.

Maybe they go into that vortex that big toenail clippings sometimes fall into.

[khall64au]

I like to think that all the teaspoons run off on a tour of America with a piece of a string, a can of baked beans, and a sacred stick . Did any body else read that book?

[kayo]

I´m glad to hear tax payers money is going into worthwhile and advancment of mankind type studies.

I´m furthermore real really really glad I don´t pay those taxes.

[The_Other_Mac]

I like to think that all the teaspoons run off on a tour of America with a piece of a string, a can of baked beans, and a sacred stick  . Did any body else read that book?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

...and then they had a party with two jugs of Kool-aid...

[Glauka]

I know that my teaspoons are with my left socks, my pencils, my rubbers, my hairclips and my pencil sharpener...

One day I will find out where they are...and that day they are going to hear me, they will wish to be the toilet (something that never disappear)...

[Patsycat]

When i do the washing up and empty the water out of the sink there is always a teaspoon left at the bottom. I have the same problem with socks and have been known to go out with one black and one white sock on. Same thing with gloves... one black and one blue... But then i often leave my brain at home....

[steveromagnino]

When i do the washing up and empty the water out of the sink there is always a teaspoon left at the bottom.  I have the same problem with socks and have been known to go out with one black and one white sock on.  Same thing with gloves...  one black and one blue... But then i often leave my brain at home....

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I do not understand. Why do you do the washing up with teaspoon and socks and gloves all in the sink?!

What sort of a blaaady blazes show are you running over there Patsycat?!!

The mind boggly boggles .

[rcalsop]

Further areas for study must be ... why is the one shoe on the beach or the road nearly always the left shoe ????.are the lefts refused entry into shoe heaven ?.

Sharp craft knives ,spare blades,, black tape , electrical screw drivers ,and glue are also under abduction from alien forces they also influence expensive glass ,the crystal cracks and shatters when looked at spoiling the set ..the free glass from petrol stations , coffee ,or certain mustards and jams can be dropped bounced treated carelessly given to the kids used to clean paint brushes , stored in the freezer , microwaved .used as a dice shaker etc .but never get lost ,chipped , cracked or broken and the cupboard slowly fills with them ...

[khall64au]

Left thongs on beaches? It's the currents. That study was undertaken about 5 yrs ago. You will only find left thongs (that's Aussie for those ugly rubber footwear thingies) on the shoreline.... accept it!!!!!

[Chang_paarp]

It was all explained in the 4 book trilogy, "The Hichhikers Guide to the Galaxy". Along with the pens, the teaspoons and socks all slip through a wormhole to another dimension in order to live out full filled lives as advertising executives and telephone sanitizers.

[toklong]

The dish ran away with the spoon.......