Why Is It So Difficult To Find A Good Friend In Thailand

[bendix]

I like the fact that the OP is politely 'Likeing' posts which are a bit critical of his position.

He seems nice and pleasant.

thequietman, can we be friends please?

Need to be cautious towards those seemingly nice and pleasant chaps.

They're not always whom they appear to be.

Nah , as I say on my profile page, TV is a fun and sometimes informative outlet. If something is funny or helpful irrespective if its my post or not, i feel it should be acknowledged.

Bendix, NO, we cannot be friends.

For someone who whines that you are lonely and can't find friends, are you sure you can afford to be so choosy?

[necronx99]

To have a friend, one must first be worthy of friendship.

thank you, grasshopper.

Did ANYONE think that Caine looked like a half cast Chinese? I could never understand why he was always getting in trouble for being Chinese, as he looked so European ( which of course David Carradine was ).

the part was originally supposed to go to Bruce Lee. The studio thought he looked too asian for mainstream american audiences....

[brit1984]

You did not say where you are.

the sticks.

but quite a few farangs around. at least 30. from all different nationalities.

Do farang in the sticks really run home when their wives tell them?

Seems very strange - surely they are there as they have the money, and then surely the say of what they do.

"wives" are not the same as pets

[edwinclapham]

You did not say where you are.

the sticks.

but quite a few farangs around. at least 30. from all different nationalities.

Do farang in the sticks really run home when their wives tell them?

Seems very strange - surely they are there as they have the money, and then surely the say of what they do.

There are some that would say that the westerner has no power over his money once he has given it away.

"Do farang in the sticks really run home when their wives tell them?"

I have a commitment to the family which I adhere to. My wife respects that I also need my own space/time as well as she needs hers.

I do not expect a phone call from my wife when I am out with the lads other than for an emergency.

[chooka]

You did not say where you are.

the sticks.

but quite a few farangs around. at least 30. from all different nationalities.

Do farang in the sticks really run home when their wives tell them?

Seems very strange - surely they are there as they have the money, and then surely the say of what they do.

There are some that would say that the westerner has no power over his money once he has given it away.

"Do farang in the sticks really run home when their wives tell them?"

I have a commitment to the family which I adhere to. My wife respects that I also need my own space/time as well as she needs hers.

I do not expect a phone call from my wife when I am out with the lads other than for an emergency.

Geez I am not allowed out, have to be along side the wife 24/7 can't even go to the local mum and pop store alone or it is 500 questions if I am gone more than 60 seconds.

[samsiam]

Geez I am not allowed out, have to be along side the wife 24/7 can't even go to the local mum and pop store alone or it is 500 questions if I am gone more than 60 seconds.

Do you iron ya frilly knickers too ??

[chooka]

Geez I am not allowed out, have to be along side the wife 24/7 can't even go to the local mum and pop store alone or it is 500 questions if I am gone more than 60 seconds.

Do you iron ya frilly knickers too ??

yep and hers

[kerryk]

I never figured out this “out with the mates thing.” I did go to Australia in the 1970's and found it rather odd then.

I take my GF/wife/significant other with me when I go out. To Go go's or wherever. I have no desire to go out with men without women. I never did.

Maybe something in my early bonding experience was messed up. I suspect I bonded with a woman instead of a guy.

Before my current “hi so Thai Chinese MBA rich father GF” I dated a number of whores and we all went out together. It was fun.

When I was in the Army they wanted me to sleep in a room with other men. I got out of that by going to a combat zone. Ladies in a combat zone were a little rougher than normal women but one gets used to it.

[chooka]

I never figured out this “out with the mates thing.” I did go to Australia in the 1970's and found it rather odd then.

I take my GF/wife/significant other with me when I go out. To Go go's or wherever. I have no desire to go out with men without women. I never did.

Maybe something in my early bonding experience was messed up. I suspect I bonded with a woman instead of a guy.

Before my current “hi so Thai Chinese MBA rich father GF” I dated a number of whores and we all went out together. It was fun.

When I was in the Army they wanted me to sleep in a room with other men. I got out of that by going to a combat zone. Ladies in a combat zone were a little rougher than normal women but one gets used to it.

Mates are everything to an Aussie. You have your mates, your dog, your ute, the footy and then the cook. Australia was built on mateship and an Aussie will die for his cobber. A good mate is something to be cherished, had, lost and disposed of a few women over the years but the mates have always been there. You can be as ocker as you want with the mates but not the cheese and kisses.

[samsiam]

I never figured out this “out with the mates thing.” I did go to Australia in the 1970's and found it rather odd then.

I take my GF/wife/significant other with me when I go out. To Go go's or wherever. I have no desire to go out with men without women. I never did.

Maybe something in my early bonding experience was messed up. I suspect I bonded with a woman instead of a guy.

Before my current “hi so Thai Chinese MBA rich father GF” I dated a number of whores and we all went out together. It was fun.

When I was in the Army they wanted me to sleep in a room with other men. I got out of that by going to a combat zone. Ladies in a combat zone were a little rougher than normal women but one gets used to it.

Mates are everything to an Aussie. You have your mates, your dog, your ute, the footy and then the cook. Australia was built on mateship and an Aussie will die for his cobber. A good mate is something to be cherished, had, lost and disposed of a few women over the years but the mates have always been there. You can be as ocker as you want with the mates but not the cheese and kisses.

You forgot the 'tinny'

[SCOTTIEDAM]

I too feel your pain. I've lived here 6 years, and I have a wife and 3 yr. old son. I no longer do the "Pussy" mongering, and am quite happy with my life, I have met alot of great people, but, being American, there are very few fellow Yanks over here, as the whole Pacific-Rim has a lot of bad Karma for Americans because of the wars fought over here, the P.O.W., the M.I.A., etc., etc. They don't consider this a vacation destination.

I have maybe 5/6 people here I consider friends, English n Aussies, but no Americans, and I do miss talkin about American stuff, that a fellow American could relate to. However a new bar has just opened on Soi Chaiypoon, called "The Rest Stop", " free plug", ha! ha! ha!, that is owned by a nice guy from Florida, so I go there a few times a week, but other than that, don't seem to run into too many. That and some creature comfort foods are the only things I miss about America.

[chooka]

I never figured out this “out with the mates thing.” I did go to Australia in the 1970's and found it rather odd then.

I take my GF/wife/significant other with me when I go out. To Go go's or wherever. I have no desire to go out with men without women. I never did.

Maybe something in my early bonding experience was messed up. I suspect I bonded with a woman instead of a guy.

Before my current “hi so Thai Chinese MBA rich father GF” I dated a number of whores and we all went out together. It was fun.

When I was in the Army they wanted me to sleep in a room with other men. I got out of that by going to a combat zone. Ladies in a combat zone were a little rougher than normal women but one gets used to it.

Mates are everything to an Aussie. You have your mates, your dog, your ute, the footy and then the cook. Australia was built on mateship and an Aussie will die for his cobber. A good mate is something to be cherished, had, lost and disposed of a few women over the years but the mates have always been there. You can be as ocker as you want with the mates but not the cheese and kisses.

You forgot the 'tinny'

Sorry cob, the tinnie, rods and BBQ.

[TommoPhysicist]

Sorry cob, the tinnie, rods and BBQ.

Chuck another snag on the barbie for me mate.

[poanoi]

I reckon its hard to find good friends in Thailand because people become defensive after what they read on the internet. They form a bad impression of their fellows from the stereotypes that are propagated in informal media

SC

I got defensive after a year of being scammed & blackmailed through insults (kee neaow, etc)

conclusion: i'm better off alone

[Ulysses G.]

I too feel your pain. I've lived here 6 years, and I have a wife and 3 yr. old son. I no longer do the "Pussy" mongering, and am quite happy with my life, I have met alot of great people, but, being American, there are very few fellow Yanks over here

I don't know where you live, but there are tons of Americans in Chiang Mai.

[kevjohn]

My best mate ( friend) comes from Thailand. Meet her in AUS.

As for finding a good friend in Thailand, mine just happened to show up

at the front door.

His name is Fred and he is very close to me as he understands

the aussie lingo and is very happy when he see me.

A dog can be a man's best friend.

[edwinclapham]

I too feel your pain. I've lived here 6 years, and I have a wife and 3 yr. old son. I no longer do the "Pussy" mongering, and am quite happy with my life, I have met alot of great people, but, being American, there are very few fellow Yanks over here, as the whole Pacific-Rim has a lot of bad Karma for Americans because of the wars fought over here, the P.O.W., the M.I.A., etc., etc. They don't consider this a vacation destination.

I have maybe 5/6 people here I consider friends, English n Aussies, but no Americans, and I do miss talkin about American stuff, that a fellow American could relate to. However a new bar has just opened on Soi Chaiypoon, called "The Rest Stop", " free plug", ha! ha! ha!, that is owned by a nice guy from Florida, so I go there a few times a week, but other than that, don't seem to run into too many. That and some creature comfort foods are the only things I miss about America.

There are a fair few Americans living in Issan . More retirees , I think their pension goes further in the main.

[kevjohn]

Geez I am not allowed out, have to be along side the wife 24/7 can't even go to the local mum and pop store alone or it is 500 questions if I am gone more than 60 seconds.

Do you iron ya frilly knickers too ??

yep and hers

That is what I call........Ausie commitment.

Thought I was the only one with such commitment.

[BigJohnnyBKK]

Did ANYONE think that Caine looked like a half cast Chinese? I could never understand why he was always getting in trouble for being Chinese, as he looked so European ( which of course David Carradine was ).

Probably the same proportion that believed he strangled himself alone in his hotel room.

Do farang in the sticks really run home when their wives tell them?

Seems very strange - surely they are there as they have the money, and then surely the say of what they do.

Actually I've known some that have put themselves in a position to be so abused she'd be prosecuted back home.

The mind boggles, my theory is some are masochists.

"wives" are not the same as pets

Some wives are better than a bad pet, some are worse than a good one. Some men like to keep pet snakes, I prefer my pretty ponies.

Whatever floats your boat dude.

[samsiam]

The mind boggles, my theory is some are masochists.

There might be a market for that...

[zzaa09]

The mind boggles, my theory is some are masochists.

There might be a market for that...

More than just a market, but still an vibrant "industry"....

[BigJohnnyBKK]

The mind boggles, my theory is some are masochists.

There might be a market for that...

More than just a market, but still an vibrant "industry"....

No "might" about it, but the older hardened players sometimes don't know how to back off, and the sweet younger ones need a lot of coaching to be willing and able to credibly play dom, very few take to it naturally. But when they do it's sure fun!

[BigSkip]

wow, I agree with many of the posts here, most expats here are not the cream of the crop, just be patient, don't give up the ship just yet......

[Beetlejuice]

Sometimes when we are living in our home country’s it`s easy to dream of pastures anew and for many they turn their dreams into reality.

Thailand comes across as an appealing destination. Full of hope and high expectations believing they will be entering a whole sparkling new way of life, wine, women and song, the meeting of all new friends and that the social prospects are unlimited.

Of course it doesn’t always work out this way and the dream can quickly turn sour.

When we leave our home countries we also leave a great deal of us behind as well. Family members, friends, general attitudes, Western sense of humour, way of life and things that are familiar to us which are maybe considered completely alien to the Thais.

I am going to be completely honest with you all and say there is many a time when I feel the blues, dearly missing having a pint in my local pub with some mates, being able to converse in a language I understand, having a laugh and being able to display my English sense of humour without worrying whether I’ll be offending anyone.

Other problems that maybe faced by those who have been absent from their countries for long periods is if returning back home could be struck from an acute form of reverse culture shock, whereas it seems everything has changed beyond recognition and is completely different to how they pictured it in their memories and probably end up hating it, with a longing to run back over to Thailand after they have decided that the good old LOS is not so bad after all.

The fact is that it is possible to feel isolated here and like a fish out of water sometimes. I believe there is a type of selfishness and lack of understanding among many towards their fellow ex-pats. Those that don’t care, cant be bothered, not willing to show any common courtesy or want to be sociable with others who are trying to create a life, get established, make contacts and form a social circle here.

It is really up to us for what we make of it, our attitudes and how supportive, sociable and tolerant of each other we are prepared to be that can make Thailand as a home from home, but better.

[edwinclapham]

^^ Good Post and I think this can apply for many ex pats living in many countries overseas as well

[transam]

wow, I agree with many of the posts here, most expats here are not the cream of the crop, just be patient, don't give up the ship just yet......

Yep, cos l am out there.

[BigJohnnyBKK]

Sometimes when we are living in our home country’s it`s easy to dream of pastures anew and for many they turn their dreams into reality.

Thailand comes across as an appealing destination. Full of hope and high expectations believing they will be entering a whole sparkling new way of life, wine, women and song, the meeting of all new friends and that the social prospects are unlimited.

Of course it doesn’t always work out this way and the dream can quickly turn sour.

When we leave our home countries we also leave a great deal of us behind as well. Family members, friends, general attitudes, Western sense of humour, way of life and things that are familiar to us which are maybe considered completely alien to the Thais.

I am going to be completely honest with you all and say there is many a time when I feel the blues, dearly missing having a pint in my local pub with some mates, being able to converse in a language I understand, having a laugh and being able to display my English sense of humour without worrying whether I’ll be offending anyone.

Other problems that maybe faced by those who have been absent from their countries for long periods is if returning back home could be struck from an acute form of reverse culture shock, whereas it seems everything has changed beyond recognition and is completely different to how they pictured it in their memories and probably end up hating it, with a longing to run back over to Thailand after they have decided that the good old LOS is not so bad after all.

The fact is that it is possible to feel isolated here and like a fish out of water sometimes. I believe there is a type of selfishness and lack of understanding among many towards their fellow ex-pats. Those that don’t care, cant be bothered, not willing to show any common courtesy or want to be sociable with others who are trying to create a life, get established, make contacts and form a social circle here.

It is really up to us for what we make of it, our attitudes and how supportive, sociable and tolerant of each other we are prepared to be that can make Thailand as a home from home, but better.

Bravo well said and couldn't agree more.

Compassion and active support for others less fortunate than ourselves is IMO a critical prerequisite to being fully human.

[thaibeachlovers]

To have a friend, one must first be worthy of friendship.

thank you, grasshopper.

Did ANYONE think that Caine looked like a half cast Chinese? I could never understand why he was always getting in trouble for being Chinese, as he looked so European ( which of course David Carradine was ).

the part was originally supposed to go to Bruce Lee. The studio thought he looked too asian for mainstream american audiences....

That's not quite correct. Bruce Lee claimed that the concept was his idea, and he intended that he would play the part. but reckons the tv company "stole" his idea and gave it to Carradine. Mind you, it was before he became a superstar.

In the end, it was probably better that he didn't get the part as he might not have gone on to make all those great movies like Enter the Dragon ( that one got me hooked on Kung <deleted> movies ).

[thequietman]

Thats why I love thaivisa.

this post went from a question about how it is hard to find good friends in Thailand to a discussion about Bruce Lee and enter the dragon. excellent.

Thanks for all your replies guys. all in all a successful post with over 500 responses.

take care and be careful out there.

[samsiam]

Thats why I love thaivisa.

this post went from a question about how it is hard to find good friends in Thailand to a discussion about Bruce Lee and enter the dragon. excellent.

Thanks for all your replies guys. all in all a successful post with over 500 responses.

take care and be careful out there.

did you find somebody ??

You sound more content.