irlguy1 Posted April 26, 2012 Share Posted April 26, 2012 I plan on getting married in September but we have both decided to hold off on the party/Thai wedding until the following year when all her family can attend. My question is this.. Should I pay Sinsod now or at the party? Please no comments on whether I should or should not pay. I am happy to do it and its not a big amount.I wasn't badgered into it. I just want to know what would be the opinion of the forum on the when not the why. Thanks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
necronx99 Posted April 27, 2012 Share Posted April 27, 2012 If you have the option then obviously later is better. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ShanePashen Posted April 27, 2012 Share Posted April 27, 2012 Hi I don't know enough about Thai culture to answer your question. I'm sure others here will. But I am curious to find out. What was the process of arriving at a figure, I won't ask how much. And what part of the country did your wife come from. At what point in your relationship was the subject raised. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brit1984 Posted April 27, 2012 Share Posted April 27, 2012 If you pay now the money may well be forgotten or spent by the time of wedding party I think the main reason for sin sod nowadays is for the family to show it off at the wedding party so I doubt they will mind to wait However, as with all questions about sin sod, it is difficult to make generalisations For example, the family may have some reason not to trust you to pay later; or pay me unfamiliar with the concept of "buy now, pay later" I recommend you sit down with your partner and her family and agree payment terms so that everyone is happy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mario2008 Posted April 27, 2012 Share Posted April 27, 2012 Sin Sod is paid during the party and showed off then. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David48 Posted April 27, 2012 Share Posted April 27, 2012 Hi I don't know enough about Thai culture to answer your question. I'm sure others here will. But I am curious to find out. What was the process of arriving at a figure, I won't ask how much. And what part of the country did your wife come from. At what point in your relationship was the subject raised. Sigh ... ShanePashen, why do you ask to be spoon fed EVERYTHING? A pinned Topic here (directly above this Thread as I write) is sin-sod-an-explanation ... with 39,539 views ... but obviously not yours. You know I (and others) try and help you ... but stop being so frigging lazy and do your own research. Apologies to the OP for this small diversion. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bangkokburning Posted April 28, 2012 Share Posted April 28, 2012 Exactly as Mario has stated, it will be waved around like a flag during the ceremony. If you pay now, they may "forget" I hope you are not paying: second marriage bar girl with child more than 60K Unless ss is a done deal, you might think about gifting rather than cash. Poor people with a cash windfall and all that... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
2unique Posted April 28, 2012 Share Posted April 28, 2012 Exactly as Mario has stated, it will be waved around like a flag during the ceremony. If you pay now, they may "forget" I hope you are not paying: second marriage bar girl with child more than 60K Unless ss is a done deal, you might think about gifting rather than cash. Poor people with a cash windfall and all that... But isn't the going rate 1 million baht now?!? Sent from Android please excuse errors in type or judgement Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
irlguy1 Posted April 28, 2012 Author Share Posted April 28, 2012 Exactly as Mario has stated, it will be waved around like a flag during the ceremony. If you pay now, they may "forget" I hope you are not paying: second marriage bar girl with child more than 60K Unless ss is a done deal, you might think about gifting rather than cash. Poor people with a cash windfall and all that... "Please no comments on whether I should or should not pay. I am happy to do it and its not a big amount.I wasn't badgered into it." Always one 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cardholder Posted April 28, 2012 Share Posted April 28, 2012 (edited) Exactly as Mario has stated, it will be waved around like a flag during the ceremony. If you pay now, they may "forget" I hope you are not paying: second marriage bar girl with child more than 60K Unless ss is a done deal, you might think about gifting rather than cash. Poor people with a cash windfall and all that... "Please no comments on whether I should or should not pay. I am happy to do it and its not a big amount.I wasn't badgered into it." Always one I am not sure which is worse - someone paying sin sot who has "not been badgered into it" or someone paying sinsot who has been badgered into it. Sin Sot - Just say "No"! (note - my post is not directed to the OP who has asked for "no comments" on paying sin sot, it is a response to bangkokburning who has commented ) Edited April 28, 2012 by cardholder Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Naam Posted April 28, 2012 Popular Post Share Posted April 28, 2012 But isn't the going rate 1 million baht now?!? Sent from Android please excuse errors in type or judgement the going rate has been raised recently to 5 million Baht, payable in gold-pressed Latinum. Sent from planet Kronos on modulated subwave frequency. Please excuse any nonsense the message might contain. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
farang000999 Posted April 30, 2012 Share Posted April 30, 2012 dont pay/for suckers only. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
letitbe Posted May 12, 2012 Share Posted May 12, 2012 dont pay/for suckers only. dont pay/for suckers only. well I know plenty of Thais who pay it and my wifes best friends boyfriend paid 1 million baht and 20 baht of gold. Its nonsense to say suckers only and in many cases it comes back in one way or another. Around 20 years ago I paid 150,000 baht and 20 baht of gold and my wifes family is very poor. In last 20 years except for some extended family her mother has never asked for anything but I have gladly paid for her operations and we got around 80% of sinsod back when she did not have enough to pay for a major needed operation an hospital. The gold she gave 1/2 back straight after wedding. Before giving rest back all shed spent was 20% on a washing machine so she could earn money and a new fridge for her fags and booze corner shop 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
exfarmer Posted May 12, 2012 Share Posted May 12, 2012 I agree with cardholder dont pay its nonsence. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kangeroo Posted May 12, 2012 Share Posted May 12, 2012 i would leave it a long as possible , a lot can happen between now and then . but good luck . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ozzieovaseas Posted May 12, 2012 Share Posted May 12, 2012 Escuse, but is this a troll? Why would anyone pay Sinsod way in advance of being married? Especially in Thailand and having access to pages upon pages of horror stories and rip offs. I cannot believe anyone would have to ask this, but if you are for real then i would suggest mentioning this to your GF and her family. Seriously any legit Thai family would not expect this ,suggest it or even allow it. What would be the point, as others have stated it is for show at the wedding, so if you gave it now then you'd only have to fork out another amount to show at the wedding as i will bet my left one that the money you will pay now will not be there later. Ask your GF and family if they want you to pay this up front, now...if they say yes then start running. I sometimes find it hard to believe that people get conned so easy but when you read stuff like this it really does make you wonder ..whats that saying about jesus weeping? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
irlguy1 Posted May 13, 2012 Author Share Posted May 13, 2012 No I am not a troll but thanks for your input.you may be right on paying before the wedding which is why I put the question out there but with regard to your follow up cynical rant well for thousands of years the father of a western bride paid the the wedding and that was all fine didn't hear anyone complain. Well this is Thai tradition and I don't have a problem honering it within reason to give a family some just standing in the community and it makes them happy. Which is a nice feeling. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aussiebebe Posted May 13, 2012 Share Posted May 13, 2012 I agree with the advice already offered; it should be made at the party, not in advance. I liked 'letibe's insight in terms of putting the payment into perspective; hospital bills and ageing in-laws are the biggest headache for any foreigner who has married a Thai. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ozzieovaseas Posted May 13, 2012 Share Posted May 13, 2012 Maybe I misworded my "rant" a little. I havent a problem with the sinsod issue itself , what i was saying was that no Thai family would/should expect the payment that far in advance of the actual wedding day. My point being that if a family actually did agree to this idea of payment so far in advance i'd consider them to be up to no good. Well sorry, I suppose i am being cynical in a way as i could imagine more than a few thai people receiving payment up front and then saying to the daughter "Well, no need to marry this guy now, this was so easy, lets just go and find another one and do it again" 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
irlguy1 Posted May 13, 2012 Author Share Posted May 13, 2012 Maybe I misworded my "rant" a little. I havent a problem with the sinsod issue itself , what i was saying was that no Thai family would/should expect the payment that far in advance of the actual wedding day.My point being that if a family actually did agree to this idea of payment so far in advance i'd consider them to be up to no good. Well sorry, I suppose i am being cynical in a way as i could imagine more than a few thai people receiving payment up front and then saying to the daughter "Well, no need to marry this guy now, this was so easy, lets just go and find another one and do it again" If u had actually properly read my post you would have noticed that they did not ask for anything let alone up front. It was me that asked so I could be better informed as to when to pay if they asked. Thanks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
473geo Posted May 13, 2012 Share Posted May 13, 2012 Are you having a Thai ceremony in the home in September, or and a registration at the amphur, where are you getting married? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
irlguy1 Posted May 13, 2012 Author Share Posted May 13, 2012 Are you having a Thai ceremony in the home in September, or and a registration at the amphur, where are you getting married? The plan is for a registration in Bangkok in September then the Thai ceremony the following Songkran in her villiage when all her family can be together with us. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
473geo Posted May 14, 2012 Share Posted May 14, 2012 (edited) Are you having a Thai ceremony in the home in September, or and a registration at the amphur, where are you getting married? The plan is for a registration in Bangkok in September then the Thai ceremony the following Songkran in her villiage when all her family can be together with us. Based on your agenda, in my opinion, there is no reason at all to 'show' or handover the sinsod until the village party - enjoy Edited May 14, 2012 by 473geo 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
irlguy1 Posted May 14, 2012 Author Share Posted May 14, 2012 Are you having a Thai ceremony in the home in September, or and a registration at the amphur, where are you getting married? The plan is for a registration in Bangkok in September then the Thai ceremony the following Songkran in her villiage when all her family can be together with us. Based on your agenda, in my opinion, there is no reason at all to 'show' or handover the sinsod until the village party - enjoy Thanks for the input mate Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
althemighty Posted May 16, 2012 Share Posted May 16, 2012 I have the same situation. Registered marriage in april as I needed to apply for visa but planned to do wedding party in december. After we got back to the village her whole familiy was at her house to witness the dowry. Had to tell them that I was not paying until the wedding party. which made her parents lose face with the older generation. But they have no choice really. I would make sure her parents know you intent to do dowry at the wedding party to prevent any lose of face. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cheeryble Posted June 21, 2012 Share Posted June 21, 2012 Are you having a Thai ceremony in the home in September, or and a registration at the amphur, where are you getting married? The plan is for a registration in Bangkok in September then the Thai ceremony the following Songkran in her villiage when all her family can be together with us. What, pray, is the conceivable advantage in getting it registered? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RAZZELL Posted June 21, 2012 Share Posted June 21, 2012 (edited) What, pray, is the conceivable advantage in getting it registered? Well, getting "registered" at the amphur makes it "legal" for a start! RAZZ Edited June 21, 2012 by RAZZELL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mario2008 Posted June 21, 2012 Share Posted June 21, 2012 The ceremony is nothing more then that and does not constitues a marriage. Only the registration, done at the ampur, is considered a legal marriage. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
irlguy1 Posted June 22, 2012 Author Share Posted June 22, 2012 The ceremony is nothing more then that and does not constitues a marriage. Only the registration, done at the ampur, is considered a legal marriage. Thanks for saving me the effort of explaining it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
krisb Posted June 23, 2012 Share Posted June 23, 2012 Hi I don't know enough about Thai culture to answer your question. I'm sure others here will. But I am curious to find out. What was the process of arriving at a figure, I won't ask how much. And what part of the country did your wife come from. At what point in your relationship was the subject raised. Sigh ... ShanePashen, why do you ask to be spoon fed EVERYTHING? A pinned Topic here (directly above this Thread as I write) is http://www.thaivisa....an-explanation/ sin-sod-an-explanation ... with 39,539 views ... but obviously not yours. You know I (and others) try and help you ... but stop being so frigging lazy and do your own research. Apologies to the OP for this small diversion. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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