Going Home

[pigeonjake]

good luck to you mate, youll get there,

im in scotland at the moment, yes my home is in thailand we have a small pig farm, that keeps my wife and her mama busy and pays them,

so while im fit and able at51 i still come to work for maybe 4,5,6 months of the year, but its all to hopefully give us a better life in the years to come, yes we both sacrefise but we know what we have to do, and we have a baby due in sept, but its my job to support my wife and child, so ill work the 7x12hour shifts on a power station or on an oil rig, my goal in to live and retire in thailand, and i know with the hard worki put in here and with my wife and her mama working hard with our pigs we will get there,

so good luck to you my freind and i mean that from the bottom of my heart, respect to you mate for what you are doing,

jake

[flying]

What on earth would be the point of staying here and going broke in five years... and then having to leave anyway and having nothing to give my wife to support her?

As for moving all my money over to Thailand, I have a similar lack of trust about moving all my resources to a country that will never allow me to be a citizen and can deport me at a whim, or change the rules and confiscate my assets.

Sorry to hear about your move. I cannot imagine being in a spot that made me choose as you have.

A couple of things I did wonder while reading your post is...

1- The five years possibility.....Since you have capital for five more years do you not think that is a decent buffer to get something going here

& not have to split up your marriage?

2- While I agree in not moving *all* of your assets...your sense of distrust of the system you are trying to live out your life in may always be a problem for you...no?

I do agree/think having a trigger is a good idea. Meaning if you reach a point you should move while you still have capital to finance your re-entry to another country. But your trigger ...if I am understanding your post correctly seems to be perhaps more of a hair trigger than I would use.

Personally I could/would never be able to leave my wife. We are not geared that way & have made preparations to never need to.

By having her obtain citizenship first in my country of origin if things ever went pear shaped ( our trigger point reached ) here we would move back there.

I feel terrible for you & cannot imagine what that decision took for you.

Good Luck in your future endeavors & hope you have a speedy result that reunites you with your wife.

[IMA_FARANG]

Good luck to you....you seem like a sensable person, and I think you'll do fine.

You probably realise too that your family expenses here in Thailand won't dissapear just because you're home in the UK.

In fact, you'll have a further source of "expenses" involved with living in the UK.

But at least you'll be generating an income there to help the picture.

It's only my own opinion, but I don't believe the financial crises you spoke of is going to get better soon.

In fact, my opinion again, it is going to get worse rather than better.

But that's a long rambling story, and not really relevant to this topic anyhow.

As my Buddhist friends might say, all things are impermanent anyhow, and to imagine otherwise is a illusion caused by the false dellusion of "self" as an independent entity.

Anyhow, good luck.

[phuturatica]

I'm very sorry to hear this but remember, its not the end of the world! Go back home and stay determined to get your ass back out here. It's what will keep you going. I wish you all the best for the future Mister.

[jshorts]

I, too, am confused when many people speak about interest rates of 1%. I am getting more than 6% (albeit before taxes) on my investments. Are people talking about "investing" in a savings account?

Yes I think they are talking about savings accounts interest rates. Show me a bank that will give you more than 6% on your savings?? And I'm not talking about time deposits for a year or on money above 100k gbp....which most people do not have. How are you getting 6% or more on your savings?!!

I never said that my money was in a bank. Sorry if I confused you. I don't consider a bank savings account as an "Investment." For the last seven years I have belonged to a very small group of private investors in Nevada. We lend money only to medical professionals as "bridge loans" to cover outstanding receivables (mostly outstanding government receivables). In all of the years I have invested money with this group not once has there been a default.

[reenatinnakor]

Thank you for doing the sensible thing and going home to get some money together. Thank you for not becoming another example of Farang refuse that litter Thailand, people who should have gone home much earlier when the wheels fell off their wagon.

Always had money. Money wasn't so much the problem as career. If you let your professional career slip (however much you may hate it), then you're in trouble. A big gap in your CV is a difficult hole to plug.

Unless you work for yourself??

Gave up a decent career working in a white man's glass ceiling 9 to 5 office world 6 years ago and don't regret a single minute of it. Even though my disposable income prevents me from buying gadgets every month like before. A career is not everything, there are other things that are less damaging to one's soul.

[crazykopite]

Thanks again to those who have posted messages of support. I really appreciate your encouragement.

There seems to be some confusion in certain posters mind over this figure of a monthly budget of 120K Baht. This would represent wealth beyond the dreams of avarice!

This figure was posted by someone else.

My income has dropped below 40K per month, I'm not going to go into my exact budget or what it's spent on each month, just to say that it has become insufficient.

I'd also like to thank the Mods for tidying up the thread and for deleting posts that are not relevant.

I must be the 1st to apologise then! I thought it was your numbers. Will have to read more carefully the thread. But yes 40k is impossible to survive on in Thailand with a wife and kids, I don't care what anyone says, it's just impossible!!.....good luck in England. Hope you come back soon.

But 120k a month? Is the person who posted that Bill Gates or something??

There are many Thais who would love to earn 40 k how do they live !!!!!

[Banzai99]

It takes a brave man to bare his financial soul, especially so, on TV which is not exactly known for sympathy.

He's anonymous.

Edited June 24, 2012 by Banzai99

[transam]

Thanks again to those who have posted messages of support. I really appreciate your encouragement.

There seems to be some confusion in certain posters mind over this figure of a monthly budget of 120K Baht. This would represent wealth beyond the dreams of avarice!

This figure was posted by someone else.

My income has dropped below 40K per month, I'm not going to go into my exact budget or what it's spent on each month, just to say that it has become insufficient.

I'd also like to thank the Mods for tidying up the thread and for deleting posts that are not relevant.

I must be the 1st to apologise then! I thought it was your numbers. Will have to read more carefully the thread. But yes 40k is impossible to survive on in Thailand with a wife and kids, I don't care what anyone says, it's just impossible!!.....good luck in England. Hope you come back soon.

But 120k a month? Is the person who posted that Bill Gates or something??

There are many Thais who would love to earn 40 k how do they live !!!!!

120000 a month equates to 30,000 UK pounds a year which is the average salary of someone in a good job in the UK before tax and less again after all the other add on taxes, so how any one needs 30,000 UK pounds in Los is crazy unless one is living a high flying life or has a very big extended family in tow. .

[crazykopite]

Hello ikbenhet,

I'm afraid that I have no qualifications to work in Thailand. I spent most of my working life in retail or the service industry before moving into security. My understanding is that a Farang cannot (legally) obtain a work permit if the work they do can just as well be done by a Thai person.

I'll be going back into security, and working 12 hour night shifts, and as many of them as I can get.

Yes, I understand only too well how expensive it is to live in the UK on poor wages... I did it until I was fifty. The only way of accumulating cash is to live very carefully.

One thing I give Thai's credit for is when they need money they will get out the cooking pots and sell food on the street what is wrong with your mrs not doing the same to make up your shortfall as for security work in the UK the money is shit the only way I can see you saving is by living rent and food free from a family member

[crazykopite]

I can survive on 40,000 THB a month and that nots being frugal, that being quite frivilous with my cash. I earn around 15,000 THB a day everyday, so I can afford a lot more. 40,000 a month is a fortune in Chiang Mai. Surely you cannot be spending more than 100,000 a month or you need your head looking at.

WOW 15,000 bht a day x 365 that is 5,475.000 million bht a year or £265,537.50 sterling I never earned that in the UK ,had my own company with 10 staff working for me !!!!!!!

[crazykopite]

I wonder about all those +65 year old farangs living in Thailand? Sooner or later thay will need serious medical care. I finally gave up on the hot weather, the financially grasping family, poor sanitation, etc. Returned to Canada, only to find that I have Prostate Cancer. Could have been disasterous in Thailand. I met many older farangs there that never check their prostate. That is playing c/w fire. Now I visit Thailand for 2 month golfing trips. No more long time relationships.

If I went to the hospital and was told I had the big C I would say thanks a lot and enjoy what time I have left ensuring I have done all my funeral arrangements, having seen other family members go through so much pain and succumb in the end I do not wish to go down that road. and yes I do have medical insurance.

[BigJohnnyBKK]

I can survive on 40,000 THB a month and that nots being frugal, that being quite frivilous with my cash. I earn around 15,000 THB a day everyday, so I can afford a lot more. 40,000 a month is a fortune in Chiang Mai. Surely you cannot be spending more than 100,000 a month or you need your head looking at.

If you've got a few kids and want them to go to a top school, truly excellent health care cover including worldwide evacuation, that'll put you over right there.

And that's not even talking about a "normal" level of consumption by back-home standards for fine food, clothing, furniture gadgets etc.

If you can truly afford it why not, even driving a Ferrari doesn't warrant a DSM-IV listing.

All depends on what your priorities are - and more importantly - can you really afford it? Most grossly err on the side of recklessness there. . .

[Soutpeel]

120000 a month equates to 30,000 UK pounds a year which is the average salary of someone in a good job in the UK before tax and less again after all the other add on taxes, so how any one needs 30,000 UK pounds in Los is crazy unless one is living a high flying life or has a very big extended family in tow. .

Completely disagree...one is not living a high flying life on 120k/m...and in fact you will find people are living a "normal life"

[hopdafru]

Always had money. Money wasn't so much the problem as career. If you let your professional career slip (however much you may hate it), then you're in trouble. A big gap in your CV is a difficult hole to plug.

This is very true when you are an employee but not so much so when an entrepreneur\self employed.

To the OP: after reading this thread my initial hunch is that life in the UK might be miserable far away from your family and the different culture you seem to have embraced (albeit not having learnt Thai which takes more motivation if your wife speaks english).

Going back to work endless night shifts might indeed generate much more monthly cash than you could get in LOS, but once you factor in cost of living, taxes etc. you will probably only be buying some time and IMO end up with about the same war chest you have now (traveling to the UK, finding a job and setting up your 'new' temporary life will have anon negligeable cost) AND be a few years older, unless very lucky.

You seem smart enough to start your own small business and close enough to your wife to put it under her name. I can share some of the things I did to avoid spoiling my war chest / life insurance and ending up broke in a few years. In your case you seem to need only a few hundred $ to make up the missing income for your visa and a bit more for health insuarance.

(As an example I have been buying and reselling cows a couple times going to some baan nork 50-100km away with $2000 in cash then reselling them in the city and making 300-400$ in one day, 1 small hyundai. All under my wifes name and with her family resources.)

Starting your own business always has its share of risk, but so does 'restarting' back in the UK, only you can estimate which is more, but I would strongly consider the various options (and the real impact of missing my wife everyday) after perhaps a small vacation and making sure you actually get a job shortly after landing in the UK. There must be some sort of competition in the UK even for night shifts, especially when over 50.

What is your objective in terms of finances to be comfortable coming back to your wife and step daughter, will you be living with friends/family to reduce living costs/augment real income etc...?

Just my 2 kip worth, ideas after all can be very powerful. Good luck to you, I hope the right path presents itself.

C.

[BOBBYTIN]

Many thanks to you all.

,i think a lot of us are one accident or bad illness from bankruptcy,sorry it did not work out. there before the grace of god goes i,is what a lot will honestly be saying to themselves.good luck

[tombkk]

An attempt at moderation and the replies have been removed. If you think a post does not fit into this topic, please use the Report button.

[Schuimpge]

[As for general expenses, Thailand is no longer cheap (if you actually want to 'live' and not exist that is) I cannot get by on less than 120k a month.

Oh no....here we go again...do you realise what you have done my son ?.....20 hail marys and wash your mouth out with soap right now

One has to wonder your requirements for living at 120K. OK only 2 of us, but my wife and I do fine on 30K. Bills/food/drink/truck and her fags.

Agree with the original poster on 120k. Depending on your level of comfort and living of course, but with 1 or 2 kids, cost go through the roof like a missile.

[jts-khorat]

[As for general expenses, Thailand is no longer cheap (if you actually want to 'live' and not exist that is) I cannot get by on less than 120k a month.

Oh no....here we go again...do you realise what you have done my son ?.....20 hail marys and wash your mouth out with soap right now

One has to wonder your requirements for living at 120K. OK only 2 of us, but my wife and I do fine on 30K. Bills/food/drink/truck and her fags.

Agree with the original poster on 120k. Depending on your level of comfort and living of course, but with 1 or 2 kids, cost go through the roof like a missile.

For all those who think THB 40,000 is enough, I could tell you the school fees for the British International School on Phuket. Possibly your eyes would pop out of your head. Of course, there is the equivalent of Thai village school here as well, and the cost is close to zero. But who would make such a choice?

It is a question of responsibilities one accrues in life, by decision. Having a wife, automatically makes her health your responsibility. Having children, automatically makes their education your responsibility.

In the long night shifts Murgatroyd has in front of him, this is something he can always fall back on: to have done the only thing possible, namely: the right thing. And I am sure his wife, still alive, does feel the same, as does his stepdaughter who now still has a future in front of her.

This should bridge a lot of hard moments. And there is light at the end of the tunnel, just need to take it one step at a time to get there.

[TommoPhysicist]

For all those who think THB 40,000 is enough, I could tell you the school fees for the British International School on Phuket. Possibly your eyes would pop out of your head. Of course, there is the equivalent of Thai village school here as well, and the cost is close to zero. But who would make such a choice?

Government school for

Almost anyone who wants their children to fit in with Thai society and working in Thailand.

International school for

Almost anyone who intends their children to not live or work in Thailand.

The alternative of leaving you wife behind, where 'chances are' she finds a local lover to comfort her, and maybe a new father for her abandoned children isn't for everyone. I'm sure this won't be the outcome for the OP. If for some unforeseen reason I were forced to return to the UK, my kids would be coming with me.

My step-daughter intends to train as a doctor, the Thai government school is doing fine with her so far.

Edited June 25, 2012 by TommoPhysicist

[Soutpeel]

For all those who think THB 40,000 is enough, I could tell you the school fees for the British International School on Phuket. Possibly your eyes would pop out of your head. Of course, there is the equivalent of Thai village school here as well, and the cost is close to zero. But who would make such a choice?

Government school for

Almost anyone who wants their children to fit in with Thai society and working in Thailand.

International school for

Almost anyone who intends their children to not live or work in Thailand.

Disagree on that opinion...you should be providing the best education you can afford...in the context of what we are talking about the vast majority of children we are talking about are dual nationals...so who is to say "they" want to stay in Thailand when they grow up ?....putting them in little boxes like this can really restricts their future irrespective of where they eventually end up living, Even if they do live in Thailand, going to an international school will give them advantages.

I am a dual national (not Thai) and my parents could have applied the same rational, but today I am glad they put me through the best education they could afford and didnt take the "cheap" option.

[BigJohnnyBKK]

Well for my two much-loved babes, the international schools cost just for term fees well over our total income so it's just a case of "would be nice" isn't it.

I too would never be able to leave my kids behind, their mother no problem. . .

But that's my situation, I'm sure the OPs doing what he's gotta do.

[plopmeister]

My step-daughter intends to train as a doctor, the Thai government school is doing fine with her so far.

...and she can do it...My wife is 35 and her school friend is a Doctor..They went to the same goovernment village school untill they were 15..

Charles, I want to say publicly that this shitfest is typical of TV knowitall tossers...Most woud have walked away when the going got tough when your lovely wife fell ill ....You are a softly spoken gentleman of great integrity...you stayed through the toughest of times before deciding to go back and replenish the finances. Hardship is when true love and responsibilities show their colours...too many fair weather sailors on this board.....you have shown balls posting this thread!!

[Tafia]

Hi Murgatroyd

I doubt if you remember me (Taff) but I arrived here a few months after you, the advice you gave me prior, during and after my move proved invaluable. I'm sorry to hear of your current situation and pray it can be resolved soon.

Despite the heartache I think you have made once again a sound and sensible decision which is in the best interests of you all.

Gods speed my friend and loads of luck and best wishes to you and your family for what I hope will be a short separation.

Regards

Taff

[mjj]

I can survive on 40,000 THB a month and that nots being frugal, that being quite frivilous with my cash. I earn around 15,000 THB a day everyday, so I can afford a lot more. 40,000 a month is a fortune in Chiang Mai. Surely you cannot be spending more than 100,000 a month or you need your head looking at.

WOW 15,000 bht a day x 365 that is 5,475.000 million bht a year or £265,537.50 sterling I never earned that in the UK ,had my own company with 10 staff working for me !!!!!!!

For man that owned his own company with 10 staff (or is that 20, no 8)your maths is shocking! Try around £109,000 a year. Still a pretty penny though.

[smokie36]

120k a month is quite a lot. That's 2400 quid....I don't think I ever spent that in the UK or US a month ever even after including pensions, mortgage, nights out, strip clubs, gambling, drugs etc etc.....that's a sizeable amount to have to spend every month esp in a country like Thailand.

But it's the number one question I ask foreigners like myself that live here....how much do you need to live comfortably like a westerner and not like a Thai family from a village. 50k thb per month seems to be the norm and that's for a family with 2 kids and car, give or take 10k either way.

Maybe thaivisa should do a poll so we have a genuine number to aim for!

What beats me is how a divorced Thai woman with kids, has a house, car, reasonable job earning about 30,000 a month and lives ok.

But when she 'plans' to marry or live with a farang the expenses go up to the above figures??

I concur. The only additional expenses would be my tacos and beer.

Oh hang on...maybe an extra 20k a month...

Ok..10k if on a budget.

[Murgatroyd]

jts-khorat, plopmeister, and Tafia, Thank you very much for your kind posts. I really appreciate them. It means a great deal to me that some members of this board think that I'm not deserting my wife and stepdaughter, only doing what I have to so as to ensure that I will have a secure future with them, and support them in the difficult times ahead.

[letitbe]

sorry to hear your tale but im confused. You say medical costs and education are two of things which drastically reduced your income ?? Can you give some figures since its one of my concerns. Weve also found our income cut dramatically in last 4-5 years and at my age no one is going to insure me. Ive always worked on basis 1-2 million baht should be enough for any major operation of one of treatment and if its longer term care hoped id just go quickly so as not to be a burden. You are quite correct most forang come here thinking its heap which if you live any sort of western lifestyle it is not. We have two children at school and that takes up a huge bit of our income at around 40-50,000 baht a month. Once in a few years when they have finished their education things will improve and in meantime were dipping into capital to pay the eduction. Your obviously much younger than me and I could not work at age of 86 but I hope ive planned enough so my family will be ok when ive gone. My main worry is not about having enough while im alive its after that and weather setting aside 1-2 million baht for medical thing is enough. I know when im gone my families income will drop again but im assuming they will be fine because i wont cost anything then.

Some figures would be useful and fact like ? did you have a house paid for. ? did you have any debt.

Best of luck anyway

[letitbe]

What a lovely positive thread (apart from the idiot with ridiculous living expenses - including his wife's rather large debts!), I almost thought I'd ended up in the wrong forum...

Love and peace...

*** and im not boasting. We live IMO a normal good life here and if you think 120k baht a month is ridiculous I really dont know how you live. Ive always had around same standard of living only before I had large surplus when living in UK or USA and now our income does not quite match our expenses mainly due to education costs. However we do try and economise as much as possible and cant get it below around 200,000 baht a month without seriously affecting our living standards. Of course we could live if we had to in some dump, eat mama noodles, send kids to some crap Thai school, suffer without any air con and travel by moterbike although how I would do that at 86 with a wife and 2 teenage kids takes some imagination. Break down of how we spend a ridiculous 200,000 baht a month :-

2 X kids school fees plus outings and things 40-50,000 pm

My medical costs 10-15,000 pm

My families medical costs 5,000 pm

food household 40-50,000 pm

2 x cars tax insurance repairs 5- 8,000 pm

Petrol (LPG to save costs) 8- 10,000 pm

Maid and help 10,000 pm

Going out entertainment 5,000 pm

My personal expenses (mostly booze) 5,000 pm

My wifes personal expenses (clothes, makeup ....) 8,000 pm

Maintenance for house (repairs ........ ) 10,000 pm

Rest is holidays here and abroad

So I just cant imagine life some of you who say we live great on peanuts are having. Sorry it just baffles me and always has

[MrHammer]

Seems like OP has made his mind up, but if I had 5 years worth of income, I would certainly spend that time learning a valuable skill that doesn't require any specific geographic location. Now, I don't now how old OP is, but if he can use a computer then in 5 years one could become a skilled web designer, writer, programmer, seo/ppc consultant, exporter, ebay seller, travel agent, tour guide, web shop owner and many more which can be translated into a business. 5 years is a long time, it's full university time, a long time to become very good at something which in turn can be swapped for money. Of course, if you're not computer literate then it will be harder. I understand that Thailand isn't an easy place to open a business, but it's not impossible at all. Most of us has been raised to be employees, but give everyone a few years of struggle and persistence and I think most would be able to make a living running their own small business.