What Is The Best Way To Heal Heart Broken?

[Candyflip]

The greatest thing is to love and beloved in return,

but sometimes it does not go that way.

What is your best way to heal a heart broken?

[Jeepz]

It varies but generally, you have to go through anger, denial, depression, then you start getting on with your life. Some people just take a few days to get through it, others take months or even years. I suppose it depends on how deeply you felt about the person and if it affects how you see yourself. Surprisingly, guys usually take longer to get over girls than vice versa.

Best to get busy and let time do its work healing any hurt feelings. After a bit, you feel like seeing other people again. Then if the magic happens, you are ready. If you go chasing it too quick, well, you may be bringing angry baggage for your next lucky lover to deal with.

Getting drunk is good for one time .. maybe twice if the bartender is good. After that you are just being a juiced goose (or gander).

Jeepz

[terdsak_12]

get pissed and get laid, or don't fall in love with folks.

[Davidcharles]

TIME is a great healer (so is a new Girlfriend!).

Hang in there kid.......

[dr_Pat_Pong]

Getting laid is the way to go Candy

[johnnyk]

a few days and nights on soi6, Pattaya

[p1p]

Spend time with friends, go anywhere and do anything to take your mind off your broken heart but do not jump into another relationship, you'll just compound your problems.

Time is the only great healer.

[Khutan]

Get Drunk, Get laid at least 3 times, stay with the nicest one for 3 days in Pattaya and it will all be forgotten

[megashox]

There's always the option of jumping off a high-rise in Pattaya!

[KevinN]

Course message deleted.

Edited February 2, 2004 by dr_Pat_Pong

[impy_la_blimpy]

Best way to heal a broken heart . . . .

Mmmmmmm - it's a tricky one - we all go through it . . [don't we! ]

For myself - having been in that situation once before - I got out - got my head together - went travelling - and built up a life around myelf & my friends. Two years on I'm just about ready to date again [should I be in the situation where I wanna!! ]

Good luck . . . . . & try no to let cynicism prevail!!

[Bluecat]

Hmmm, not so easy to reply without knowing your background. There is heart broken and there is heart broken,...

Anyway, in a nutshell

DO NOT

1.Drink, or at least do not get drunk. It will probably make you sad and depressed, not talking about making you sick,...

2. Go in a short time relationship with any girl, it will remind you of your "girl", and the comparison will probably not be in favour of the "short time" girl,...

DO

1. Meet as many friends as possible. Talk about everything and nothing but TALK

2. Go out of your usual environment, do not go to the same places, bars, restaurants you went with her. CHANGE.

3. Keep yourself busy, which will help you not to THINK

And as somebody else said, do not worry, time is a great healer

Cheers

[pongster303]

yes gettin a root is the best way to heal i suppose...

[warriors]

close your eyes and think about the money you just saved yourself.

Then like most of us go out and do it ALL AGAIN

Life is to short to be alone enjoy.

Just watch her eyes more closely next time

if she kissers you can you feel it or is it just lust?

Nothing changers we do know the right one when we are with them.

Just go out there with more knowledge this time

chokdee mark

[DSBones]

Good Question.

I am considering jumping ship before I sail too far into deep water.

I have been seeing a girl for a few months now who works in Soi 33 whilst finishing University. We have a good relationship and we talk a lot. She has no problem in expressing her feelings about many personal things. For example, she said that she had special feelings for one expat guy who frequents Soi 33 a lot. I could tell by the way she spoke about this guy that she was very close to loving him. I have no problem with this. You can not dictate how people feel. I do not live in Thailand but visit once a month. I know that the expats who live there have an advantage, particularly in Soi 33, where you can build up a good rapport with the girls. I encourage her to continue working because I think it gives her some independence and stops her from getting lazy.

However, when it comes to talking about her feelings for me it is not so straightforward. Whatever she says is clouded in my eyes by the fact that I give her money. I do this because I want to try and keep things at a sensible level but it is not working. Last month when I was in Bkk I did not see her for a few days & I missed her. It was quite scary for me.

Unless I can find some way of determining her true feelings for me I may have to end our relationship. I do not want to hang around for another year until she finishes University & then find that her feelings for me were not as genuine as they currently appear and that I was merely a convenient financial (& occasionally emotional) crutch. The emotional upset would be too great.

It's no use discreetly talking to her friends because they know the game and would not wish to jeopardise her 'relationship' (read that how you wish) with me. We talk a lot and have agreed that if one of us gets bored then we should let the other person know and we can end the relationship amicably. This is easy for me to do ..possibly,not so easy for her. I suspect that she would say nothing and I would be moved effortlessly from "potential boyfriend" into the "customer" category and I would be none the wiser.

Ending relationships is never easy. I have been on the receiving end & also the giving end. It is not nice. Drinking solves nothing. I have been keeping myself busy to try and avoid thinking about the situation. It does not help to dwell on past conversations or experiences because this just confuses your thoughts. I am back in BKK next week..and at the moment I do not know which way I am going to jump (metaphorically speaking ).

It feels good to have put my thoughts on paper. If you are still reading this then thanks a lot..you may have more staying power than me. Only time will tell!!

[Candyflip]

Hello All,

Thank you for the votes and comments. Valentine's Day is coming up but lot of mates are breaking up with bfs and I am bad at giving advice.

Surprisingly, nobody votes to stay alone. Finding a new lover seem the way to go huh?

I voted for crying ( super girly!) After crying out loud , I always feel better ( way to release my stress and tension ) and after seeing unhealty face the next morning, it always makes me say " that guy is not worth my beauty!"

Keep smiling

[NedKelly]

Well Candyflip. As someone said. Time is the best healer. Only time. Getting drunk is no good as it makes you dependent on alcohol (or could do anyway) and the last thing you need to do is to damage your health as well. You just need to say F ... it and get on with life. Many people forget to have their own life when in a relationship so when it ends they feel lost like they have nothing. The only answer is within you.......talking, drinking etc etc is what some people do to get over it. Crying is natural so let it happen and just let the normal grieving processes take their path. Why do you ask ? Did someone break your heart ?

[Khutan]

Ok;

here is some salient advice -:

When somethink is broken, you repair it with glue . .

Yes ??

so if you break mum's christal (whatever the spelling is) you use a special glue like that invisable "super Glue"

Yes ??

So for a broken heart you use "Pygama Glue"

Ok.

off you go

[The Gentleman Scamp]

It's all good advice buddy, personally drink and sex does it for me short term, though it's been a long while since I've been stung, and touch wood it's never happenned in Thailand.

R.E. Valentines day, that's bad enough when you're single, let alone when you're heart is covered in scaffolding.

There will be girls out there in the same boat and they'll be out on the night looking for love or simply companionship - I suggest you find one.

This will be the first year in a long time I haven't been alone valentines day, though I'm not in love with her, I'm madly in 'like' with her, so it all works out in the end for us nice guys.

[impy_la_blimpy]

I voted to stay alone - thats because I have been - for the last 2 years [through choice]

now I'm kinda thinking that it'd be cool to meet a nice guy and have some fun. Know what you mean about Valentines Day tho - time of year you get it drilled into your head that you 'should' be with a significant other!! I'm strong - and have enjoyd singledom immensly [to the surprise of my friends!] - but hey - it's time to move on to purer shores!

Keep smilin'

Imp

[Girlfrombar]

Once (again) I would never ever forget,

When a guy who i was falling in love with said me this to refuse the love from me;

"Well, life goes on"

truly hurt but his words kept me back to REALITY.

and these 2 things do help me A LOT: lifetime friends and KARAOKE!!!!!!!!!!

It ain't gonna be easy to get it thru..

but

Well.. Life goes on!

GFB.

PS. When admin gonna unban me?

[Bluecat]

PS. When admin gonna unban me?

Soon, soon, soon,...

Do not be so impatient.

I think, they are dying to UNBAN you,...

[Nat]

Surprisingly, nobody votes to stay alone. Finding a new lover seem the way to go huh?

When you've had your heart broken the best thing is getting absolutely smashed (pollutants of your choice) and getting laid. True doesn't settle things inside, but it's a great ego boost - it helped make me feel human again (but than I haven't had my heart broken in a long time - that's one of the side effects ).

Think that one needs to spend time alone - it's the only way you learn who you are and what you want out of life. Once you're happy with you, everything else is easy - besides men make women messy (right ? ). Seriously though there's nothing wrong with taking a lover on to help in the healing process - but as long as you recognise it's someone on the rebound (all is fine). Enjoy singlehood as long as you can before you become a "smug married couple" (as bridget jones would say )

[tutsiwarrior]

Become philosophical. Some 30 years back the McGarrigle sisters had a song that went:

Some say the heart is just like a wheel

when it's bended

it can't be mended

Then there is a famous bumper sticker in the US that had to do with being damaged by the people you love then hunting them down and shooting them.

All open to interpretation, of course.

Chin up...and eyes forward. Don't get drunk...get even. Violence is messy.

[Candyflip]

Nat, I love your idea of getting laid to get ego boost!! Excellent.

Last Valentines' day I went to museum, I think this year I will go to museum again!

[dr_Pat_Pong]

Nat, I love your idea of getting laid to get ego boost!! Excellent.

Last Valentines' day I went to museum, I think this year I will go to museum again!

They stuff things at museums Candy...good luck

[Nat]

Nat, I love your idea of getting laid to get ego boost!! Excellent.

Last Valentines' day I went to museum, I think this year I will go to museum again!

I have a warped way of thinking sometimes.

Going to the museum isn't a bad idea - valentine's day is always a disaster for me, even when I do have a boyfriend! Actually, spending it in a museum would've been great

[e-san]

I'll do my laundry before going to museum. Hate Valentine's day!

[impy_la_blimpy]

I'll do my laundry before going to museum. Hate Valentine's day!

I'll stay in bed . . .ALONE . . .watch Love Story with a box of Kleenex and depress myself as much as poss!

THEN I'll do the laundry

THEN I'll go to the museum

[dr_Pat_Pong]

Ohhhhhh jeez.............