Phronesis Posted September 5, 2012 Share Posted September 5, 2012 I am currently spending some time up in my girl's village in deepest darkest Isaan. One of the things that I love about visiting is getting to chat with her Grandmother and Grandfather. I love seeing them, they are inspirational...tough as nails...and still get up every morning at dawn to wander off and tend the farm. They are both in their nineties and literally founded their village a half a century ago in the wake of WWII. Grandad is a gem and he still has a spark in his eyes. The other night I shared a few cups of whiskey with him and I quietly asked if he still has a crack at Grandma. His response was: "mai bpen rai...hetdang fi...hetdang fi". My Thai is fair but my Isaan is horrid so the next day when I was with my girl and her Grandma I asked what is "hetdang fi". At first all I got was puzzled looks so I had to explain in English to my girl about the topic of my drunken chat with Grandpa the night before. My girl then erupted in animated discussion, in Isaan, with Grandma and they both broke out in a roar laughter and then carried on like two 13 year old school girls. Using my girl as the interpreter, Grandma then explained to me that hetdang fi was an Isaan concoction that was used to give older men "power". After some negotiation, and more laughter, I was given the following recipee from Grandma: ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Hetdang Fi Recipee Ingredients 6 red mushrooms (Het dang). These look like the mushrooms you would see in a old European fairytale book. They are big with a lovely bright red top. There are several in the photograph I have uploaded below for your reference. I have no idea regarding where they can be found throughout Thailand. But from personal experience, with a deal of hard work, they can be picked from the mountains surrounding my girl's village. 2 medium sized five minute potatoes (Man Ha Na tee). These potatoes look more like ugly grey pointed sticks with rough bark. They are well known and you will have little trouble getting your hands on some at a talad sod up north. 1 good handful of fire flys (Hing Hoy). I love these little blokes, and seeing them float around in the Thai bush after dark. The best way to catch them is with one of the fine mesh nets that the Isaan kids use to catch fresh water shrimp. 2 litres of clean water Method Roughly chop the mushrooms and the potatoes into cubes. DO NOT skin the mushrooms or the potatoes. Pick the wings off the fire flys and finely chop their bodies. Put the the mushrooms, potatoes, fire flys and water into a cooking pot on a hot flame and bring quickly to the boil. Then take the pot off the hot flame and put it over some gentle embers. Apparently it is very important to let the ingredients slowly stew over 4 to 5 hours while the water gently evaporates off. Stir the mix vigourously every half hour until it has reduced to the consistency of stiff porridge. Storage and application Once cooked the mixture should be let cool to room temperature. It can then be spooned into a bamboo tube for storage (it doesn't keep for long apparently a week tops...). The mixture must be rubbed onto the blokes tackle about ten minutes before he has to be on the job. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- This week, I spent most evenings running around like an lunatic in the bush catching fire flys with the kids. I have already secured the red mushrooms from a neighbour as it is shrooming season up here at the moment. Today, the missus is going to the talad sod and I have told her to get some five minute potatoes. I plan on cooking up a batch of Grandma's brew in the next few days and will provide you with my feedback once it has been road tested. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
smokie36 Posted September 5, 2012 Share Posted September 5, 2012 Haha...grear thread....we await your report....this could have drastic results for the firefly population! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tinfoilhat Posted September 5, 2012 Share Posted September 5, 2012 these look remarkably like Amanita muscaria, although they are too small. google suggests it might be these http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amanita_rubrovolvata, which might explain how or why they work as they are toxic (though all "magic" mushrooms are to some extent). interesting Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
travelmann Posted September 5, 2012 Share Posted September 5, 2012 Good on Grandma/Pa my Wife seems to think when you get old you dont have sex any more, she's only 36 and have no idea why she thinks this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
submaniac Posted September 5, 2012 Share Posted September 5, 2012 ^^because it is a good excuse to avoid having sex with you? 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
onionluke Posted September 5, 2012 Share Posted September 5, 2012 ok well , flyagaric mightn kill you whereas phisolsibon might just make you want to die . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
smokie36 Posted September 5, 2012 Share Posted September 5, 2012 ok well , flyagaric mightn kill you whereas phisolsibon might just make you want to die . I'm a fan of the latter...especially in a field by a stream on a lovely summer's day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
notmyself Posted September 5, 2012 Share Posted September 5, 2012 Tried it but all I got was a stiff neck Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swissie Posted September 5, 2012 Share Posted September 5, 2012 You may well be on your way. Mix funny mushrooms with the advice of Grandpa and Grandma and you may find a cure for cancer. Just enjoy your stay as long it will last and next time you visit, bring along some Viagra or Ciaiis. That will dramatically reduce "sexual-disfuncions" among the male village population, After that, they will not care much about collecting mushrooms in the forest anymore. Trust me. There is a drawback: As opposed to mushrooms and the advice of Grandpa and Grandma, above mentioned medication is not free of charge and has to be bought at a pharmacy. If there was a ready supply of natural plants that have the same effect, I don't think that farmers would bother to grow standard crops anymore, Cheers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bkkjames Posted September 5, 2012 Share Posted September 5, 2012 How anyone cannot get a hard on here is beyond me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chris1dna Posted September 5, 2012 Share Posted September 5, 2012 ^^Apparently.^^ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Naam Posted September 5, 2012 Popular Post Share Posted September 5, 2012 How anyone cannot get a hard on here is beyond me. because you are clueless? 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GuestHouse Posted September 5, 2012 Share Posted September 5, 2012 I would have thought feeding the kids, aunts uncles and everyone else living in the house might be a more practical solution. Knock the family out so Granddad and Grandma can have a bit of privacy for their nuptials. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CharlieH Posted September 5, 2012 Share Posted September 5, 2012 Messing with mushrooms.. , thank god its a topical application and not one you have to ingest. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
onionluke Posted September 6, 2012 Share Posted September 6, 2012 ok well , flyagaric mightn kill you whereas phisolsibon might just make you want to die . I'm a fan of the latter...especially in a field by a stream on a lovely summer's day. up the hill behind Glengoyne distillery , with mod parker pockets full of the little creatures , and they were communicating with a series of clicks and rustle sounds , and so it went , we got to wondering if the water from the hill side for the whisky enhanced the flavour and did the sheep like mushies too Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bkkjames Posted September 6, 2012 Share Posted September 6, 2012 How anyone cannot get a hard on here is beyond me. because you are clueless? exactly. maybe I am the exception (touching wood) but with so many nubile females about, i have a hard time keeping him down. lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beetlejuice Posted September 6, 2012 Share Posted September 6, 2012 I am having sexual dyfunctions. Not because i can`t perform, but because I can`t find anyone willing to have sex with me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chuang Posted September 6, 2012 Share Posted September 6, 2012 It's good to know that you are enjoying yourself in the thai village....good luck... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phronesis Posted September 6, 2012 Author Share Posted September 6, 2012 Alright... The missus wasn't able to get the potatoes at the market yesterday. But this afternoon, with the help of a cousin in law, I got some in a neighbouring village. I traded some tobacco for them. I also got some really big red mushrooms picked fresh this morning. I have already "dewinged" the poor little fire flys and their chopped up bodies are sitting in a glass jar. They look a bit like cracked black pepper... Tomorrow I will cook up my first batch of Isaan viagra. I am having a great deal of fun...I loved science at school... What odds are my fellow TV posters putting on my success??? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WebBangkok Posted September 6, 2012 Share Posted September 6, 2012 Good on Grandma/Pa my Wife seems to think when you get old you dont have sex any more, she's only 36 and have no idea why she thinks this. My wife is 36 and I have to come up with the excuses sometimes........ Poor lad. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bagwan Posted September 6, 2012 Share Posted September 6, 2012 The youth of the past 50 years have always thought that their parents sex lives ended at their conception. The thought of Mum and Dad still enjoying a bit of 'naughty' made them feel sick. When my kids reached the age of 21 years I kicked them out of the house and told them to make their own way in life. At last we could have it away on the kitchen table again when the mood took us - and a few other places too. No, we didn't have any chandeliers, or try it out standing up in a hammock. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dorothy1985 Posted September 6, 2012 Share Posted September 6, 2012 Send me some please. EMS before this saturday evening would be sweet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlackArtemis Posted September 6, 2012 Share Posted September 6, 2012 glad to see it was topical, as fireflies are toxic. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pacificperson Posted September 6, 2012 Share Posted September 6, 2012 Topical works best when applied by an eighteen year old virgin. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fullwhenempty Posted September 7, 2012 Share Posted September 7, 2012 Another traditional remedy is KAEMPFERIA PARVIFLORA ('Krachai Dam'). The only fly you need to mess with is the one sewn into your shorts. Thai TV are advertising a natural tonic they guarantee restores a man's vigor. It is called Tang Seam Jeng and has 8 Chinese herbs, one of which is Ginseng. It's a bit pricey unless you buy 3 bottles at a time (buy 1, get one free). Took about 10 days and the old man is fully recovered. Rascal is standing to attention every time I wake up in the night for a pee. Quite amazing I have to say. There is a concern in Thailand that steroids are added to some of these remedies, so beware of contaminated products. The above is 100% natural (or so the manufacturers claim). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Naam Posted September 9, 2012 Share Posted September 9, 2012 The youth of the past 50 years have always thought that their parents sex lives ended at their conception. The thought of Mum and Dad still enjoying a bit of 'naughty' made them feel sick. When my kids reached the age of 21 years I kicked them out of the house and told them to make their own way in life. At last we could have it away on the kitchen table again when the mood took us - and a few other places too. No, we didn't have any chandeliers, or try it out standing up in a hammock. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rockhopper Posted September 9, 2012 Share Posted September 9, 2012 Monday, October 15, Thai Sidagra (Viagra) available at pharmacy. About ฿45 per 50mg. pill. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stefb1964 Posted September 9, 2012 Share Posted September 9, 2012 5555... can't wait to read your report on this one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tanaka Posted September 9, 2012 Share Posted September 9, 2012 The youth of the past 50 years have always thought that their parents sex lives ended at their conception. The thought of Mum and Dad still enjoying a bit of 'naughty' made them feel sick. When my kids reached the age of 21 years I kicked them out of the house and told them to make their own way in life. At last we could have it away on the kitchen table again when the mood took us - and a few other places too. No, we didn't have any chandeliers, or try it out standing up in a hammock. Did you still have the canopy over the hammock? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kinmaew Posted September 9, 2012 Share Posted September 9, 2012 Be careful my friends. Ever heard of "Death Cup" mushrooms. Not saying these are those but if you do not know what you are looking for you could end up meeting the maker sooner than you think. Here is a something I used on my last visit. Got these from a drug store in Pattaya. They are called "Akara", they are all natural and they work!! Other things to try: There is a Thai herbal tablet called "Grachai Dam" and also "Butea Superba". In addition to that, try Maca powder, and eating the heads of celery sticks. Google these and you will find more info and enjoy!! safely! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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