Advice For New Thai/falang Baby.

[ramayer]

Hi everyone hoping to get some advice on my situation. I have been with my Thai gf friend for 4-5 years since we first met with me making regular visits to Thailand to see her and staying in touch online. The last visit was in January and things didn’t end to well and I thought it would maybe come to an end. Instead of our regular online chats and calls we haven’t spoke much in the last few months. Just last week she has told maybe she is pregnant with my baby and its due in a few weeks time. With the distance between us and lack of recent contact I was quite shocked at the news so had a good chat with her and have seen her on web camera and the hospital scans, she says its 100% my baby and even wants me to name her.

Now i can’t get over to Thailand for another 2 months due to work but as long as any DNA tests confirm i am the father i want to do things by the book and be a part of the baby’s life.

When the baby is born what then happens in terms of the birth certificate and names? And do I need to be there to sign them?

The mother has never asked about moving to the UK, she has another son in Thailand and a settled home, job etc.. so i think it looks like she will stay there with the baby and i will visit as much as I can. Legally will i be able to be on the birth certificate and get the baby a Thai and UK passport?

As its happened so fast and i wont be there until 6-7 weeks after the birth I just don’t want to miss anything and hope someone can offer some advice. Thanks for any replies.

[krisb]

Go chat with Mario, hes got the answers you need.(Mario looks like Fozzy Bear)

[Mario2008]

To become the legal father, you will have to go to court. it is not a difficult process, especially with DNA proof and the mother agreeing. But will take a few months. Upside is with that after the court approves you and gives you custody together with the mother over the child you will be able to get non-O visas.

More info: http://www.thaivisa.com/forum/topic/381917-how-to-gain-parental-rights-as-a-father/

You can be on the birth certificate without being present, but it has no real signifigance. It is only a claim by the person who reports the birth that you are the father.

But with the birth certificate and the mother you will be able to claim you are the father at the UK ambassy and the child might be entitled to your nationality. (That depends on how you got your nationality).

Because of the motehr the child will have Thai nationality, because of you he will be a Brit. Both countries allow dual nationality.

[ramayer]

Thanks very much Mario thats some great information and advice. Can i just clarify a few things... so I should have my name put on the certificate by the mother as I will not be there which can later be used for a UK passport but no legal parenting rights in Thailand?

For this I need to go to court and take your option 3." The father petitions the court to become the legal father of the child. This is the only option that can be used when the child is too young or the mother or child don't consent to the legitimization. If the mother does consent, it is a relatively simply process, a longer one if the mother doesn't agree."

Can this be done anytime after the birth? and how long would it take? Is it a matter of 1 or 2 court visits for the 3 of us or quite a long wait where I would have to stay in Thailand?

I am hoping to get a DNA test done is this required for the court ?

One last thing Mario when we name the child on the birth certificate can we have a Thai first name English middle name and then 1 or both sir names?

Does my sir name have to be the childs sir name of just named as the father to get a UK passport?

Thanks again for any more advice and answers you can give me its very much appreciated as I had no clue before.

[Mario2008]

It makes things easier if the name is on the birth certificate, but not a real requirement.

legitimisation at the court can be doen at any time after the birth. Wil take a few months, also depending on the court you have to use. (That will be the court for the distrcit where the baby is registered in the husehold book). BKK takes longer as it is very bussy.

It will mean a few appearences, but soemone who went through this process can better advise.

A court will love DNA proof, as that makes it beyond doubt.

The sirname of the child does not have to be yours, it can be the mothers as well and when you have not legitimize the child some amphurs will insist on a Thai name and not a foreign name.

For the UK passport the naming of you on the birth certificate will be enough, together with the mother approving the passport.

See: http://ukinthailand.fco.gov.uk/en/help-for-british-nationals/living-in-thailand/how-register-birth/

and http://ukinhongkong.fco.gov.uk/en/help-for-british-nationals/passports/how-to-apply/thailand/first-time-applications

[ramayer]

Thanks Mario much appreciated.

Do you know much about getting a DNA test done and what it involves? I dont want to upset the mother by asking for it to be done but if it helps get the baby a UK passport and makes me the legal father I think it should be done.

[Mario2008]

A DNA test usually means taking some slime from the inside of your cheek with a cotton but and from the baby too. Then it takes a few weeks to get the results.

You can wait till the court asks for it, then it will be they who are asking for it and not you.

[PoorSucker]

Excuse me.

You meet her last time in January and now it's end of October and she is due in few weeks time.

Is this correct?

[TommoPhysicist]

Your name, transliterated into Thai, can be on the birth certificate, no problem, you don't need to be there.

Easiest way to get full rights over the child in Thailand is to marry the mother, it doesn't matter if it is after the birth.

Child's surname can be yours (transliterated into Thai) or hers, up to the person doing the registering.

They might need a photocopy of your passport.

UK don't requite a DNA test, you say it's yours and it can have a UK passport and UK Overseas Birth Certificate.

(Assuming you are a UK national that was born in the UK)

[ramayer]

Excuse me.

You meet her last time in January and now it's end of October and she is due in few weeks time.

Is this correct?

Hi the last time we met was all of January into first week Febuary she is due anytime now.

[ramayer]

Thanks for the advice Tommo I guess after the birth I will have a better idea of my feelings and what should be done.

[ramayer]

Is there anyone on this forum who has a Thai baby but lives away in another country? With my situation i think this is what I will have to do atleast for the first year with just visits. Struggling to come to terms with how thats going to work and the emotions involved. Any advice or similar stories would be a help, thanks.

[Mario2008]

Children under 3 to 4 years old don't have a very good memory, you probably can't rememebr things from when you were 2 yers old very well.

As a consequence, you being away will mean that you are a stranger to the child. There are things like skype and telephone to keep intact and help keep the memory of you live.

But don't expect to much of a bond with the child if you are away. It will be a oneway street and the imput of the mother is also important in dealing with it.