Are Western Getting All The Thai Ladies...the Good Ones?

[bkkgriz]

55555555555. No.

[mauGR1]

I'm gonna add my tongue in cheek comments and say...

No, Western men aren't getting all the 'good' Thai ladies cause the good Thai ladies aren't daft enough to go with you guys!

(I'm joking by the way)

But Western girls obviously get always the best Thai guys ..

[bonobo]

What is a "good" Thai lady? One with a sweet personality and who is a loving wife and mother, or one with an education or position in society? Not that they are mutually exclusive, but I rather think "good" is defined by the person rather than her circumstances.

As far as education, I don't think I know socially a single Thai women without at least a bachelors degree. Most have at least a masters or Ph.D. Exactly two of them are in relationships with non-Thais. Every one of the rest are married or in relationships with Thai men. On a business level, either as employees or as customers/suppliers, I don't think I know a single woman who is in a relationship with a foreigner.

The only exception to this is that I socialize sometimes with fellow military expats around the country. Most of them are married to Thais, and I have no idea as to their wive's backgrounds. But I only know the women as so-and-so's wife. None are what I would consider friends by themselves.

[Boo]

I'm gonna add my tongue in cheek comments and say...

No, Western men aren't getting all the 'good' Thai ladies cause the good Thai ladies aren't daft enough to go with you guys!

(I'm joking by the way)

But Western girls obviously get always the best Thai guys ..

I don't see western girls trying to justify their choices by asking if they get the best, that seems to be a male only pastime. It must be a horrible way to live, needing that kind of validation.

Edited April 6, 2013 by Boo

[mauGR1]

I'm gonna add my tongue in cheek comments and say...

No, Western men aren't getting all the 'good' Thai ladies cause the good Thai ladies aren't daft enough to go with you guys!

(I'm joking by the way)

But Western girls obviously get always the best Thai guys ..

I don't see western girls trying to justify their choices by asking if they get the best, that seems to be a male only pastime. It must be a horrible way to live, needing that kind of validation.

C'mon Boo, just kidding

[MrHammer]

Is this a troll post cause certainly people don't believe this?

[NeverSure]

I'm gonna add my tongue in cheek comments and say...

No, Western men aren't getting all the 'good' Thai ladies cause the good Thai ladies aren't daft enough to go with you guys!

(I'm joking by the way)

No you aren't joking. You're also right.

[Jayroo]

Out of all the westerners i know of,

only 2 has a thai gf with bachelor's degree or above, and a job that goes with it,

myself included.

That may work out to be around 3%.

So to answer the question: Nope,

the westerners are typically stuck with prostitutes,

that stay with the westerner in a on-job relation

you have nfi...what makes you think you're an exception?

Sent from my GT-I9100 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

[Ulu Watu]

What is a "good" Thai lady? One with a sweet personality and who is a loving wife and mother, or one with an education or position in society? Not that they are mutually exclusive, but I rather think "good" is defined by the person rather than her circumstances.

As far as education, I don't think I know socially a single Thai women without at least a bachelors degree. Most have at least a masters or Ph.D. Exactly two of them are in relationships with non-Thais. Every one of the rest are married or in relationships with Thai men. On a business level, either as employees or as customers/suppliers, I don't think I know a single woman who is in a relationship with a foreigner.

The only exception to this is that I socialize sometimes with fellow military expats around the country. Most of them are married to Thais, and I have no idea as to their wive's backgrounds. But I only know the women as so-and-so's wife. None are what I would consider friends by themselves.

I wonder how many of them are beaten and cheated on,as is the accepted norm with a Thai spouse?Hardly surprising that those in the know would rather choose a Farang husband,it's only poor education that would lead them to think that physical abuse in a relationship is perfectly acceptable!

Edited April 6, 2013 by Ulu Watu

[ExpatJ]

My wife and I have just celebrated our 14th wedding anniversary, she has a degree, we moved here 3 years ago from the UK. All of our friends are Thai/farang mix and none with a bar girl...(well one). They all are former air hostesses or currently still are and mainly all Bangkok families!

My point finally, is that if they know a little about the world, they will go for farang every time! It isn't about money, we are not rich, comfortable, but not rich, we both still have to work. It's about respect, Thai women do not feel respected by Thai men. Their are exceptions of course, one of my brothers in law for one, great man, good dad, good to his family, the other one who is married to a loverly women, is a <deleted> of the highest order!

If you think it's all just about money, your doing it wrong!

"Thai women do not feel respected by Thai men." lol, have to laugh at the Thai ladies who tell their farang bfs/husband this because more than half of them seem have thai boyfriends on the side. Its purely stroking the egos of the farang men and it seems to work most of the time- you have to wonder at the naivety of the farangs who believe the whole "Thai man no good, drink to mutt, etc etc"..

[Nuna]

I'm gonna add my tongue in cheek comments and say...

No, Western men aren't getting all the 'good' Thai ladies cause the good Thai ladies aren't daft enough to go with you guys!

(I'm joking by the way)

But Western girls obviously get always the best Thai guys ..

What is the definition of "the best thai guys" you have? As far as I know most of the "Hi-So" guys try to date actresses. They are educated, money more than enough but only one thing they aren't is being famous and dating actresses can complete it.

Some are married to good girls who born in to gentry families with long history.

Besides, less classy thai men than above prefer well educated chinese-thai women. I don't want to insult anyone but thai men in general believe that asian women in general ( not bar girl ) are more conservative and less slutty than western ones. It's considered lucky if they have chance to marry a virgin.

Edited April 7, 2013 by Nuna

[bonobo]

What is a "good" Thai lady? One with a sweet personality and who is a loving wife and mother, or one with an education or position in society? Not that they are mutually exclusive, but I rather think "good" is defined by the person rather than her circumstances.

As far as education, I don't think I know socially a single Thai women without at least a bachelors degree. Most have at least a masters or Ph.D. Exactly two of them are in relationships with non-Thais. Every one of the rest are married or in relationships with Thai men. On a business level, either as employees or as customers/suppliers, I don't think I know a single woman who is in a relationship with a foreigner.

The only exception to this is that I socialize sometimes with fellow military expats around the country. Most of them are married to Thais, and I have no idea as to their wive's backgrounds. But I only know the women as so-and-so's wife. None are what I would consider friends by themselves.

I wonder how many of them are beaten and cheated on,as is the accepted norm with a Thai spouse?Hardly surprising that those in the know would rather choose a Farang husband,it's only poor education that would lead them to think that physical abuse in a relationship is perfectly acceptable!

I guess you missed what i wrote. Pretty much every single Thai woman I know on a social level (excepting those married to my expat friends) are well educated. I will go further to write that probably half of them were educated in the West. So not only have they been well-educated, but they are familiar with Western culture. Yet they married or are in relationships with Thai men.

Spousal abuse is a world-wide issue (and 20% of it in the US is female to male abuse.) Abuse and especially cheating are rampant, not just here in Thailand.

[ABCer]

Ahahahaha. That was a good one. There is a reason Thai dudes don't get upset about farang men 'stealing' their women, because most of us are taking women that they have no interest in at all. Ask some Thai people, foreigners have a reputation for liking ugly women. Foreigners also tend to get the mentally ill, prostitutes, gold diggers, drug and alcohol addicts, and the unemployable. Even women without those major problems usually have something that Thai men consider undesirable, such as being a single mother or just being unattractive. There are a large number of problem women specifically targeting foreigners, as they are seen as easy marks. Foreigner aren't limited to the left overs, but that is what is throwing themselves at them, and a lot of guys just end up with the first girl to hop in to his bed without quoting a price.

"...such as being a single mother..."

I'm afraid there is a different mechanism in action here. It is not that we get 'good girls' or girls not attractive to Thai men. In most cases a girl seeks LOVE first. Gets the result in a form of a baby and than starts looking for a father for her baby.

Thai men do not mind because they do not lose anything. Sorry for sounding cynical, but this is how it works here in most cases.

[FunFon]

NO,,, most thai men will marry a "good thai lady" but also many (not all) will have a gik or second wife, but almost never take a bar girl.

-

Actually most surveys I've seen on the subject indicate that the vast majority of Thai males are customers of the sex work industry, often figures of 80% or higher depending on the frequency indicated in the survey question.

In many western countries the figure is more like 10-20%, although of course that figure is much higher for those that choose to come to Thailand.

It would be pretty much inconceivable these days for a group of men in a business entertainment context to go out to visit a brothel together in most NES countries, whereas it's quite acceptable and common here.

Personally I don't think anything wrong with that, IMO these issues have nothing to do with true "morality".

Just sayin'. . .

[Trembly]

NO,,, most thai men will marry a "good thai lady" but also many (not all) will have a gik or second wife, but almost never take a bar girl.

-

Actually most surveys I've seen on the subject indicate that the vast majority of Thai males are customers of the sex work industry, often figures of 80% or higher depending on the frequency indicated in the survey question.

In many western countries the figure is more like 10-20%, although of course that figure is much higher for those that choose to come to Thailand.

It would be pretty much inconceivable these days for a group of men in a business entertainment context to go out to visit a brothel together in most NES countries, whereas it's quite acceptable and common here.

Personally I don't think anything wrong with that, IMO these issues have nothing to do with true "morality".

Just sayin'. . .

I think by "take a bar girl" wildorchid meant to take a bar girl as a wife.

[poanoi]

No she meant almost never take a karaoke girl for a ride, which isn't true.

[FunFon]

NO,,, most thai men will marry a "good thai lady" but also many (not all) will have a gik or second wife, but almost never take a bar girl.

-

Actually most surveys I've seen on the subject indicate that the vast majority of Thai males are customers of the sex work industry, often figures of 80% or higher depending on the frequency indicated in the survey question.

In many western countries the figure is more like 10-20%, although of course that figure is much higher for those that choose to come to Thailand.

It would be pretty much inconceivable these days for a group of men in a business entertainment context to go out to visit a brothel together in most NES countries, whereas it's quite acceptable and common here.

Personally I don't think anything wrong with that, IMO these issues have nothing to do with true "morality".

Just sayin'. . .

I think by "take a bar girl" wildorchid meant to take a bar girl as a wife.

-

I don't think so, such an idea is so far beyond the pale for a Thai it's not even worth mentioning.

The fact that the type of sex work establishments frequented by Thai men don't use "bar girl" as their cover story may contribute to a misunderstanding as well. Coffee shops, hotel lobbies, massage parlors, barber shops, picnic style food and whisky stalls in the street, office girls and students making a bit on the side are much more common than the farang-style freelancers playing pool or barfine arrangements.

Edited April 10, 2013 by FunFon

[MrHammer]

I'm gonna add my tongue in cheek comments and say...

No, Western men aren't getting all the 'good' Thai ladies cause the good Thai ladies aren't daft enough to go with you guys!

(I'm joking by the way)

Are you daft enough? ;-) Send PM with measurements and photo.

(Not joking)

[MrHammer]

I'm gonna add my tongue in cheek comments and say...

No, Western men aren't getting all the 'good' Thai ladies cause the good Thai ladies aren't daft enough to go with you guys!

(I'm joking by the way)

But Western girls obviously get always the best Thai guys ..

I don't see western girls trying to justify their choices by asking if they get the best, that seems to be a male only pastime. It must be a horrible way to live, needing that kind of validation.

But with the last sentence you show you care anyway. Totally unneeded. Me thinks you also have some issues with (western) men.

[Trembly]

NO,,, most thai men will marry a "good thai lady" but also many (not all) will have a gik or second wife, but almost never take a bar girl.

-

Actually most surveys I've seen on the subject indicate that the vast majority of Thai males are customers of the sex work industry, often figures of 80% or higher depending on the frequency indicated in the survey question.

In many western countries the figure is more like 10-20%, although of course that figure is much higher for those that choose to come to Thailand.

It would be pretty much inconceivable these days for a group of men in a business entertainment context to go out to visit a brothel together in most NES countries, whereas it's quite acceptable and common here.

Personally I don't think anything wrong with that, IMO these issues have nothing to do with true "morality".

Just sayin'. . .

I think by "take a bar girl" wildorchid meant to take a bar girl as a wife.

-

I don't think so, such an idea is so far beyond the pale for a Thai it's not even worth mentioning.

The fact that the type of sex work establishments frequented by Thai men don't use "bar girl" as their cover story may contribute to a misunderstanding as well. Coffee shops, hotel lobbies, massage parlors, barber shops, picnic style food and whisky stalls in the street, office girls and students making a bit on the side are much more common than the farang-style freelancers playing pool or barfine arrangements.

Making allowances for the fact that English is not wildorchid's first language, I understood that wildorchid was using "bar girl" as shorthand all or any of those. Let's just call them "working girls" then. I also understood that working girls being beyond the pale for the vast majority of mainstream Thai men to be the point that she was making.

That was just how I read it anyway . . .

[FunFon]

Making allowances for the fact that English is not wildorchid's first language, I understood that wildorchid was using "bar girl" as shorthand all or any of those. Let's just call them "working girls" then. I also understood that working girls being beyond the pale for the vast majority of mainstream Thai men to be the point that she was making.

That was just how I read it anyway . .

-

Completely agree that most Thai men wouldn't consider entering into a long-term relationships with a sex worker, and think the farang who end up doing so complete idiots.

However I took her meaning to be that most don't even partake of such pleasures short-time, which is of course <deleted>.

Plus you've got the fact that most westerners would call many typical mia noi arrangements prostitution anyway, any kind of polygamy is immoral etc, and the cultural differences really begin to muddy the waters.

[givenall]

Don't worry there are planty more out there

[Tchooptip]

Where there is a big age difference it is probably safe to assume in most cases that the foreigner is marrying a Thai from a lower socio economic group than himself.

Nothing wrong with that. As long as both parties are happy with the arrangment.

Of course it is only natural to also assume that the better educated more monied Thai women will not be so readily available for foreigners. They have more options and they probably dont come into contact anyway with the vast majority of foreigners who visit thailand.

The only place where this doesnt apply is here on thai visa where everyman is married to a girl with a degree or pots of money.

Where there is a big age difference it is probably safe to assume in most cases that the foreigner is marrying a Thai from a lower socio economic group than himself.

... a lower socio economic group of some blokes... is totally impossible to find even in Thailand

[bostonboy]

to the OP

here in Vancouver

pretty much every educated Thai girl that is from an upper middle class family prefers to date Thai men only

you very rarely see anything but former bg's and couples with a big age gap with foreigner's

it just the truth

and my wife is an ex-bg.......so i am not looking down on that

that being said. if your wife is conservative, and acts appropriately.......why wouldn't she fit in with family and friends?

not to sound snooty, but i work in an industry that is very lucrative( i am not at the top of the chain, not at bottom)

my wife has been to conferences that have had many millionaires attended and by all accounts, has gotten on fine

been to homes worth 4-5mil usd regularly

goes out regularly with my friend's wife, whose family owns one of the biggest independent clothing chains in Canada

goes to the movies with my friend's wife and her friend, who is a doctor

none of that is some kind of brag.

it is just reality and i don't think any of these people give it a 2nd thought of what she may have done before or where she comes from

my sister's adore my wife and she spends most days with them when we go to visit back in the states( but my family shouldn't look down on anyone!)

on the flip, so it is not just a money thing

my wife's best friend here is married to a local author. he isn't rich but obviously socializes with other intellectuals

and they absolutely adore his wife

so for the OP, i honestly can't think of a situation i know of the many where the thai girl's are not accepted by friends and families. i would be hard pressed to think about a situation where they don't totally adore their new sister-in-law/daughter-in-law

[isawasnake]

It depends entirely on what "good ones" are to you.

I answer this question thinking about back home though. Are the foreign guys getting girls. Sure. But their numbers are relatively so small that it doesn't put any sort of damper on things. For the most part, the locals are pulling in almost all the available tail. Farangs pulling in the same 1% (or less than) of the female population, over and over again, isn't providing much real competition to the Thai men.

Edited April 13, 2013 by isawasnake