Naked! Look Any Better?

[IMHO]

Just read your updated ad, allow me to have a go at a rewrite:

2010 Mazda2 [Groove|Spirit|Maxx] 1.5L Automatic Hatchback for sale in Bangkok.

One (farang) owner, only 34,000KM travelled, full service history. Full option with steering wheel audio controls and body kit. Registration and 1st class insurance to May 2014. 430,000 Baht, offers considered.

Call [insert name] on [phone number] for further details or to arrange an inspection.

No tire kickers or men of their word, please.

You could probably omit the last sentence though

That's all you need to establish with potential buyers it's the model they've been looking for. You're not going to convince someone looking for a Camry that they should also consider this car, and the rest of the fluff added make you sound like a used car salesman - and if they wanted that, they'd just go see one

Just as an aside to this, even after reading the ad in full, I had to scroll up and down, re-read big chunks of your ad before I was able to understand the core info presented in my version.. and no, I don't need a bigger screen

[IDL]

Just read your updated ad, allow me to have a go at a rewrite:

2010 Mazda2 [Groove|Spirit|Maxx] 1.5L Automatic Hatchback for sale in Bangkok.

One (farang) owner, only 34,000KM travelled, full service history. Full option with steering wheel audio controls and body kit. Registration and 1st class insurance to May 2014. 430,000 Baht, offers considered.

Call [insert name] on [phone number] for further details or to arrange an inspection.

No tire kickers or men of their word, please.

You could probably omit the last sentence though

That's all you need to establish with potential buyers it's the model they've been looking for. You're not going to convince someone looking for a Camry that they should also consider this car, and the rest of the fluff added make you sound like a used car salesman - and if they wanted that, they'd just go see one

IMHO makes a good point.

What model is it as there was a fair bit of difference between the bottom

of the range Groove to the Maxx?

Regards

Will

It's a 'Spirit Sport' (silly title had nothing to do with me-LOL).

If I recall correctly there were [2010] 4/5 models available at the time, I chose the penultimate [to top] as the small (in my mind unnecessary) differences simply weren't worth an extra 50k. In addition, I had 10 more [Mazda] options added to the car.

IMHO, and yourself, have pointed out what I feel many have missed. And from what I've seen from other ads, it appears the models are donning fewer options these days.